Secluded Chapter 21.
It took a little while for me to wake up fully the next morning. I spent most of the night silently crying, wishing Eric wouldn't have to leave. I cursed Four for getting sick and putting Eric in this situation. I could see Eric in the bathroom shaving his face and sides of his head getting back into his full Dauntless look. Today was our last full day to spend together and I hoped it wouldn't be a sad one. I got up feeling a little better and determined to try and be happy for us, I walked into the bathroom and wrapped my arms around Eric and melted into him.
"How you feeling?" I asked him
"Honestly, I'm not looking forward to going back. I've forgotten how to be mean, intimidating Eric." He says sighing.
"Well I'm sure it won't be THAT hard" I say smiling, teasing him. He grins at me from the mirror and brushes his hair blonde hair back.
"What should we do today?" I ask him
"I thought we had plans?" he asks confused
"You mean out date tonight?" I responded
"Yeah – did you want to do anything else? I can go with you to Amity farms if you need help picking up a few extra things." He suggests
"Nah, I'll be okay. I think I have plenty of food for a while. Now that it'll just be me eating" I say sullenly
"Hey, it's just for two months, tops. I'll be back before you know it. This way you can complete your training and do some painting in peace. Then I get you the rest of the year. Got it?" he asks, focusing on me.
"Ok, but if you are a day more than two months I'm walking back and kicking down Max's door. And demanding you to come back." I say pointing at him in the mirror. He smirks and says "That's my girl". He turns around and kisses me on the forehead. "Let's go eat some breakfast and start preparing for tonight" he says.
"It's not going to take that long to get dinner ready." I tell him, following him downstairs.
"Yeah but I want to spend all day there with you. We should get started so we can go" he says opening the refrigerator. "Why don't you hop in the shower while I get the dinner and blankets together? It's my turn to surprise you" he tells me. Not seeing him in the kitchen the next two months is going to be painful. Or when he rides his horse shirtless, or comes out of the bathroom dripping wet from his showers. That last one usually ends up pissing me off because he likes to sit on the bed soaking wet which makes the bed wet. But I take one look at his arms and chest and it's all forgotten.
"You done daydreaming?" he asks, now facing me with hands full of food. That stupid grin on his face…
"Yup, sounds good" I tell him, pretending I was fully content. Even though I was really not.
"Now get that butt upstairs before I make you get up there. Don't want any tardiness in this house interrupting my hot date tonight." He says in a louder, darker, maybe even sexier voice. I roll my eyes and cross my arms.
"See, I told you it wouldn't take you long to turn it around. And here I thought you'd gone too Amity on me." I say walking 'my butt' upstairs.
*ERIC POV*
I roll my eyes when I watch her walking upstairs. I start to pull a dish together for tonight and hope to God it didn't turn out like shit. Thank god I live with a woman who has the same cooking abilities as I do. I definitely wouldn't admit that in front of her. Were both mediocre at it, not terrible or great but just average. I hear the shower turn on and begin cooking…
While I have a pot of water boiling I run upstairs to the hall closet and begin my search for the one thing we may need tonight. I don't want to assume anything but… safety first, as I always say. We've been getting really close lately and now that I'll be gone for two months she may want to have sex for the first time. And I have no idea if this place was stocked with condoms. Probably not, but you never know. I should have bought them the last time I was in amity. I just didn't want to embarrass Tris or make her uncomfortable. Shit. I didn't see any so I walk down the stairs to finish dinner…
"Hey what you doing?" she asks walking out of the shower in her towel. Fuck I really need to find a condom, and fast. I would take her against the stairs in a heartbeat if I could. But I wouldn't do that to her.
"Uh just looking for… something." I say flustered
"Is it something I can help you look for?" she asks, innocently. Part of me wants to tell her. She would want to be safe. But the other part of me is too embarrassed to ask and afraid she may get the wrong idea. I'm such a fucking pussy… just tell her…
"Fuck…" I say under my breath.
"I was looking for….condoms. I was looking for condoms. Just in case. You never know. And I don't want you to assume that this was what this date was about because it's not. I just want to bring one for just in case purposes. And if we do, do it. I don't want you to think I was unsafe and not thoughtful… because I am. Which is why I am looking for one…" I say, quickly. Rambling sentence together, hopefully she heard what I said, or just the point of it. I force a smile, rather awkwardly. Trying to ease tension.
"Shit, I didn't even think of one" she says disappointed and sighing.
"So you aren't mad? Or weirded out?" I ask her
"Why would I be? I mean we talked about it before. Not the condom part but having sex. It wouldn't be weird. And it's not." She says calmly. Thank fucking heavens she's mine. I have the best girlfriend ever. I smile, releasing a breath of air which felt like all the tension inside me and pent up anxiety coming out in one swift breath.
"So, are there?" I ask
"I haven't seen any, and I haven't seen any in Amity farms either now that I think about it. The Amity don't really believe in condoms and birth control unless you see the doctor first about preventing babies. The whole making love until you are married part, they seem pretty serious about it. Now that I think about it, nobody really gets divorced here. They're literally too happy around here" she says, making me laugh.
"So what should we do?" I ask
"We just have to be careful, maybe you can sneak some from dauntless when you get back?" she asks hopeful
"I didn't think of that, but that means tonight…" I say, but she cuts me off
"It means tonight, whatever happens… happens. Let's not overthink it, okay?" she says biting her lip and putting a hand on my arm. Quickly assuring me that things are okay.
"I'm good with that" I tell her and putting my lips on her cheek, leaving a small kiss where her cheeks are red.
"K" she says grinning, looking at her feet. "Well I better go get dressed and you should check on the food…" she says
"Or I could help you get dressed and then I'll go downstairs?" I say teasing her, and watching her roll her eyes at me. I chuckle as she shuts the bedroom door and I hear a muffled voice say "Nice try".
*TRIC POV*
"If we don't slow down the food is going to slide right out of the dish" I yell at him as we ride together on one horse down to the willow tree.
"It's fine, I promise. We're almost there, hold your horses" he says, laughing.
"We should have taken two horses" I say
"What's the fun in that? It's more romantic this way don't you think" he says.
We're almost to the tree and the sun will start in about an hour. I'm thinking he timed this so we could watch the sunset together. A few moments later we arrive and it takes us a couple minutes to soak in our surroundings. Every time I come here it takes my breath away. From this spot, I can probably guess there is not one living human within thirty miles at least. And off the cliff not one person has lived past it in the last two hundred years at least. All that is past the cliff in which we are close by, is trees, dirt and hills.
Eric pats me on my leg and asks "Ready?"
"Yup, let's do this." I say smiling.
A few hours later, it's completely dark except for us. Eric brought a few candles from the barn to illuminate us. If we didn't, we wouldn't be able to see anything. We're lying on the blanket under the tree and on our sides and talking live we've been doing all night. Our bellies full from the delicious dinner Eric made. All night I couldn't help but smile so much. My cheeks were actually beginning to hurt. It couldn't be more perfect.
"So if your dad became factionless, why wouldn't you want to help them?" I ask him, continuing our conversation about our families.
"He wasn't always a nice guy to me and my sister. Always trying to manipulate my mother and us. Once we became teenagers, it's like a switch was flipped. He became controlling and angry. Part of me still misses him but it's still hard to forget and forgive you know?" he says to me.
"Why do you think he acted that way towards you guys suddenly? Seems a but odd" I tell him
"I don't know, once we became of age and could defect, I took my chance and didn't look back. I've thought about it over the years and can honestly say it's bothered me some. I want to forgive him but what's the point?" he says
"You have to forgive him in order to move on, that's why. Doesn't matter what he's done. You'd be doing yourself a favor to forgive. In life, the biggest question is simply, 'why'. And the scary thing about it, is that most of the time we don't get an answer. And we have to just accept that." I tell him
"When did you get so wise" he asks me, caressing my cheek
"I don't know, just lately I've had a lot on my mind I guess. A lot of 'why' questions." I tell him looking down. My mind quickly trying to rid the word 'Divergent' that is plastered everywhere.
"Tell me" he says, encouraging me.
"I trust you" I simply tell him
"And I trust you, I think we've known that for a while here." He says sitting up a little taller.
"When I was younger, I grew up feeling different from all the kids. I wanted to be different. I remember getting in to trouble multiple times by hanging out and running with other Dauntless. You should have seen the horror on my parents faces. My father would take me on trips to different factions for work. I'd always been so fascinated with each and every one of them. In their own unique ways. Growing up I always knew something was weird about me but it was never thought about or talked about. Until I took my aptitude test… and that's when I learned I was definitely Divergent…" I tell him, studying him, looking for any change and ready for anything he was about to say.
"I always knew you were a weirdo." He says laughing
"Hey!" I say lightly punching his shoulder
"I'm just saying, it explains a lot. I kept wondering and wondering why my girlfriend was so fucking weird and amazing…. I guess I kind of knew. But it doesn't bother me or change anything Tris. I still love you" he says. Loved me? My heart started pounded and my mouth went instantly dry. He loves me?
"You love me?..." I ask him, still in shock.
"You know I do" he says rolling his eyes and bringing his forehead close to mine.
"I love you too" I quickly say, before the moment is lost. I kiss him passionately and straddle him till his back is on the ground and kiss him fiercely. "Show me you love me. Make love to me tonight. I want this tonight" I tell him. I want him to show me how much he loves me. I want to feel the fireworks and the grand finale. To give me something else to remember him by when he's gone. He pushes a strand of hair behind my ear and caresses my cheek. Our faces only a mere few inches away.
"I didn't say that so that we could.."
"I know, but I want this now. Don't overthink it. Just kiss me" I tell him, locking our lips together. I feel his hands on my hips, rocking me into his hardness I feel below me. Sending electricity into my core. I pull away and strip my shirt off and then I push up his shirt and lay kisses from his navel all the way back up to his mouth slowly. His hands find my bra clasp and he pushes each band off my shoulders at once slowly. My nipples quickly harden from my arousal and from the cold. His fingertips graze the sides of my breasts and my head falls back as my body starts to heat up. Quickly he sits up and adjusts me on his lap and then lays me on my back onto the blanket gently.
"We have to be careful tonight, for more than one reason. Just remember that" he tells me, his lips above my bellybutton. I feel his hot breath tickling me and I feel his mouth go towards my nipple. He's teasing me at this point. And he's being way too gentle.
I decide to start unbuttoning his pants to hopefully give a sign that I am ready. He lets me unbutton them as his lips graze each nipple and then he places his lips onto mine and kisses me softly.
"Tonight I'll be gentle but other nights, I can't promise I will be again" he says smiling into my mouth.
"I'll hold you to that" I tell him. I feel his hands yank at my zipper and quickly pulled down aggressively. My panties going down with them too. Giving me a taste of a different sexual side of Eric that I hope to experience tonight at some point. He pulls his tight briefs down with his pants and my heart starts to speed up when I see how hard and long he is. Suddenly nervous about what is going to happen.
Eric quickly senses my nerves and puts his forehead down to mine and runs his fingers up and down my thighs, bringing it to swing around his waist.
"Just breathe, it will only hurt for a second and then you won't be able to get enough" he says chuckling. I smile and close my eyes, relaxing and wiggling my hips down to feel him. I suddenly feel the tip of his cock run up and down my pussy, every once and a while it swirling into my entrance. I can tell already how wet I am from him spreading it. I moan softly every time his head rubs against my clit. My sweet spot as I like to call it. He could make me cum by just doing this. He certainly knew how to make a girl fall apart.
I feel the head of his cock push lightly into me, teasing my entrance and then slowly pushing into me all at once. I gasp quietly, and feel his entire member inside me. Pushing into me with slow strokes. His head falls at the crook of my neck and that's when I hear him groan. Which really turned me on even more. The light pain I felt was all over and I hooked the other leg around his waist and squeezed him to me so that he could go faster inside me. I felt him leave trails of kisses on my neck as he pumped into me faster.
I glance down between us and watch his cock pump into me and then look up at him and see his eyes already waiting for me. Lust in both of our eyes, he reaches down to kiss me again and again. My body begins to tingle again like he's made once before. Knowing my orgasm was about to happen I squeeze my pussy around his cock and then all at once my fireworks flew. And so did his, inside me.
"Fuck, Tris" he groans
"I know, that was amazing" I tell him panting
"How are we ever going to stop? I'm literally going to cry because I will be without this for weeks" he says putting head into the crook of my neck. I laugh. "At least you will have something to look forward to" I say
"I would have even before" He says giving my lips a peck.
"You came in me" I tell him, realizing we weren't even careful.
"Yeah, I don't know what to say about that. I was in the moment…" he says
"It was just as much my fault, we should be okay. I don't reach my ovulation for a while" I tell him
"We should think about some kind of birth control though, when I get back I won't be able to keep my hands off of you" he tells me, grinning at me.
"I'll talk to the amity doctors about birth control while you find condoms in dauntless. Deal?" I tell him
"Deal." He says
The next morning, we wake up in our bed naked and tangled in the sheets. Eric has to leave soon and I really don't want to be alone for weeks. It's going to be hell.
"Good morning beautiful" he says kissing my cheek
"Morning" I tell him, trying to put on a good smile and attitude
"Don't be sad, we will see each other again. We both have agendas and deals we have to fulfill. But I will be thinking of you every day though." He tells me.
"You better" I say and he grins at me. I kiss him before he gets up and walks to the bathroom and I lay back reminiscing the last twelve hours. It was one of the best nights of my life. Magical even.
A tear sneaks its way out of my eye and I'm silently crying. Fuck you Four.
A Dauntless vehicle approaches us as we stand side by side on the porch.
"You ready, do you need anything for the ride back?" I ask him, putting my hands on my hips.
"I'll be fine, you've done plenty Tris" he says. I made him a big breakfast and made sure his old Dauntless clothes were clean and pressed just how he liked them. And made sure he shaved everywhere he needed and that it looked perfect, just how he liked it. I had put a book in his bag with a few pressed flowers from our garden to remind him of us. And I even snuck a pair of panties in there for him, to also remind him of something else.
"Okay" I say
We watch the car stop in front of the house and Max step out of the drivers side along with Peter in the passenger seat.
"Hey you two" Peter says smirking as he walks closer.
"Staying long, Peter?" I ask him
"Nope, just here with Max on a mission. First stop, picking up Eric." He tells me. I turn to Eric, and realize he has to go now. My eyes tear up and my lips quiver slightly.
"Don't cry, Tris. I will be back soon, I promise." He tells me, kissing me full on the lips with both his hands on the side of my head. I reach up and put my hands on his hands and kiss him back. I don't know how long the kiss lasts but I hear someone clear their throat. I don't bother to look because I only have these few seconds with Eric before he leaves and I don't want to waste them on anyone else.
"I'll think of you every day till you get back. I love you" I tell him
"And I love you, Tris" he says pulling away. I watch him walk to the car and before getting in he looks back at me and waves. The car drives away and that's when I sink down against the door and clutch my chest and cry. And I stay there all night, wishing the best thing in my life would just come back.
A/n: PHEW! Longest chapter I've written! I really really hope you enjoyed it and will review. I would love reviews of this chapter, please! I wanted to say that, please, if you have sex. WEAR A CONDOM. I don't condone not wearing one if you aren't married. This is just part of the story... And also everyone's first time is different. I wanted to get all that out of the way before I receive weird and mean reviews/comments. Also, I apologize for POV switching a few times...This chapter was roughly edited, so I apologize bad grammar, writing, and misspelled words. I was just really excited to get this chapter out! Thanks for all the reviews I have gotten so far. My story has finally reached 35k reads which is amazing! Thanks again readers, Eric lives on!