Madeline had often compared me to a spider monkey when I was a child. My wandering slim fast hands that always gave Mademoiselle Perrul the terrors were always exploring, climbing things. I had often wondered if I was just trying to get myself out of that hell that was my childhood home. I could feel my hands trying to climb up a well. Blood of all the men that I had murdered was on me the walls were slippery with it

I had woken with a gasp with Asa beside me. She was asleep but she reached over trying to comfort me. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep anymore so I swung my legs out as they touched the cool marble and I had remembered where I was./div

I replaced the mask and got out of bed not disturbing my sleeping companion. I looked over at her with the firelight making her face look alive even when she was asleep. I had insisted that even when she stayed with me the lights were bedded down. True she knew my face but I could not bare it if at the moment of my ecstasy she would cringe.

I walked to the door wrapping my robe tight around me opened it. I knew no one would be in the courtyard at this time of night ever since I came to Persia my love and appreciation of the heavenly bodies had come back in full force. When I got there I looked up and sighed heavily feeling my chest relax I had wandered over to one of the wicker chairs and slumped into it./div

I took off one of my leather gloves put my hand over my eyes tiredly. I must have fallen asleep because one moment my lap was empty the next the little Siamese kitten was on it looking at me with those sliitted beautiful blue eyes of her looking at me with concern purring then she chirruped. I began to caress her absentmindedly her back arched her back legs stood up "What are you doing up my little one?"

Suddenly my head snapped all of my attention was focused on something that was coming although I don't know what it was. My heart raced in my chest, my breath intensified, my guard was up but nothing but a fog had obscured my sight. I didn't want to give away my position. My hand went to the Punjab Lasso in my pocket and tightened. I got up and wished I wasn't so undressed. I could feel what should have been a warm wind blowing across my exposed hand but it was icy. Whoever had dared to come into this courtyard without my knowledge will die tonight

I had never seen fog in Persia but it seemed to be everywhere tonight. "Who's there?" I growled. There was a form in the fog but I didn't know if it was male or female. Voices seemed to grow and hiss out words that I had heard since I was a baby "Monster" "Corpse" "Freak" "Murderer"

I turned away and closed my eyes muttering "It's just a dream. You aren't there." A young girl's scream of horror, a body falling on masonry, a harsh cry "I've been there. You can't hurt me." but my voice cracked

A familiar voice spoke out chilling me to the bone "Corpse...are you ready?"

My eyes widened but I never looked behind me. I could imagine his bowels falling out of his gut, his fleshy dough of his skin falling off of his fat pig like face "I killed you!

A evil chuckle from the other voice "True true my corpse but in your mind..we are always here" I could feel a cold dead finger touch the side of my temple as I shuddered and pulled away. Another chuckle "You're a monster and no woman would love you.

"The next moment I was in Nadir's bedroom but the fog was with me. I could see he was awake and crying. I wanted to reach out and comfort him. Javert was gone but another ghost of my past was with me. "You'll have to kill his son..the same way I should have done with you when you first drew breathe. If he knew what you looked like he would die wouldn't he because he would scream..and scream and scream!"

""No...Reza would never.." I could feel my chest hitch

"Yes he would." I could feel a hand on my shoulder but it was warm not cold. Nadir was looking at me sadly "We both know that I am just a lonely man. When you are killed by the Khanum I will find someone else."

Then he went back over to his bed and just like that I was back in my own room along with Asa's dead body. I could see her murderer standing above her but his back was turned. "No...No please! Not Asa! Not her!"

I ran over to the bed and began to take her pause but her throat was slit. I turned to the murderer and saw a very familiar face...it was me! My mask was off and I had this sadistic smile madness in my eyes. "No...I wouldn't!" \

"The other me sneered "But you will...soon you will be out of your mind and you will kill everything that you ever though you loved." I picked her up and clutched her to my chest crying

The "Mad me" jerked me away and the fog enveloped both of us. I could feel the coldness of me radiating and I could smell the madness. We were in Reza's room the mad me put a finger to his lips "No..dear God no...not like Asa...he's just a child!"

He'll die like the rest." the mad me said rationally

""But I can help him..." the mad me went over to the boy's bed and put his hand on his forehead and then raised the knife. I tried to run over and protect his small defenseless body but my feet felt nailed to the floor

Reza woke up and said quietly "Whose there?"

The Mad Me looked over to me and smiled sadistically "It's me Reza. Go back to sleep"

But the mad me's mouth never opened I looked down to my hand and saw a bloody knife. I didn't know why but I was over Reza and he was dead his throat was slit open. I started to scream Nadir ran in and saw what "we" had done. When he saw the knife he ran over and scooped up the boy's body. He never had the chance to turn around because I was stabbing him over and over again tears were rolling down my face. When he was finally dead I howled my grief and despair and rage over killing my only friend, my lover the innocent child.

I awoke shaking the bed with my horse screams Asa was comforting me looking at me with concern. Tears were streaming down my mask all I was saying over over again " I'am so sorry. I am so sorry. I am so sorry." serif;"I could hear her saying very quietly "It's alright."

She dried my tears but I needed to feel flesh upon flesh. "I need to feel something my dear Asa please let me take off my mask...please." I didn't need to say anymore she did it for me. She kissed my forehead gently. I collapsed on her chest shuddering. There was an urgent knock at the door as Asa got up but not before promising that she would be back. I put my head in the pillow tears were still trailing.

The door opened as I heard Nadir's voice "Is he alright Asa?" I heard her say yes that I had a nightmare. Nadir said if he needs anything come and get him and then the door shut. Her lilth body came and sat back down on the bed gathering me in her arms shushing me and trying to keep me calm. I put my arms around her waist my tears soaked through her nightgown. She took it off as I felt her flesh. I started to cry even harder. "It's alright Erik." /div

She had started to kiss me all over as I closed my eyes at the onslaught of the sweetness of her. For the next few hours it was just us. The next morning Nadir was in the dining room with two cups of very strong coffee. He looked at me over the rim of his with a look I couldn't fathom then put it back down on the table. "Asa told me about the nightmare...are you alright?" he asked softly

I had picked up my coffee moodily and drank it "I'm fine Deroga." /div

"Hmm.."

"What does Hmm mean?"

"You usually call me Deroga when you don't wanna talk about it." he said nonchalantly

"What if I don't?" I snarled at him

He picked up the mug again and sipped as if my answer meant nothing. "When you wake up my son with those screams a young girl in your bed it does concern me Erik."

I could have denied him and I was about ready to when my chest hitched again. Suddenly I had found my voice come bubbling out and confessing everything. He did not judge me just sat there and listened with infinite patience. When I was finished I looked up at him silently, He just said "It was nothing but a dream my friend. I know you will never harm Reza like that or myself"

"But Asa..."

"He raised a hand up to silence me "You did not let me finish...you love her yes?"

"I hung my head and said softly "Yes as much as I could love anyone."

He got up and picked up the coffee pot and filled both of our lukewarm coffee with a small tired smile on his face. "I'm sorry my friend...Reza had a rough night."/div

"I jumped up "Why didn't you get me?" I asked in concern

He shrugged his shoulders and said "I thought you also might like to be alone..." one of his elegant eyebrows arched "Has Asa not pleased you my friend?" I said nothing but he pressed on gently "But the nightmares are coming back more?"

"It's not of Persia my friend."

He said nothing more and neither did I.