A/N: I'm sooo sorry for the wait. This semester's workload got really, really crazy, then there was a bunch of family stuff that needed dealing with. Anyways, I hope this chapter makes up for it. Please excuse the middle section's quality. The last… third-ish is what I had the most focus on. Anyways, enjoy.

Oh, and since some of you got the occasional status update/if you're not doing so already, yeah, this is shameless self promotion, but I'm Watson-a-name on tumblr, so if you want the occasional "I'm this far on 2B, expect and update on such and such a day", follow me over there if you have an account.

I won't keep you any longer. Enjoy!

Loki was in Hell.

He and Darcy had just managed to pretend to mend their fight, and it was one big happy party again that was lasting far too long, but everything went downhill from there again.

One- Tony's head of security, Happy, had shown up two hours prior, literally kicking in the door and yelling nonsense in the process. He had claimed that the partygoers had taken Tony hostage and was not going to negotiate but things would be fine. Needless to say, the man was quite confused when he saw Tony relaxing on the couch, feet thrown up onto one of the ottomans with a glass of scotch in hand. He had all but mumbled an apology before retreating to a corner, still not convinced everyone's intentions with him were okay.

Two- Later, Tony had taken up ducking and hiding every so often from Frigga, who was attempting to reason with him that him paying for the wedding on his own would just not do, and Happy was getting antsy about his constant disappearances, despite Jarvis insisting it was okay.

Three- Logan, Steve and Wade had shown up. He didn't mind Logan, since Jarvis had called him in for Loki's moral support. Wade was the issue, having come because he and Logan were on location and he "smelled incoming drama" and wanted to check it out. Steve showed as back-up for Logan.

Four- Coulson, of all people, had shown up over a noise complaint issued by a neighbor, only to spot Steve and completely shut down. He forgot all about the complaint and was now watching the man from what was apparently his hiding spot in his own corner.

Five- His father was starting to mumble complaints about the food he and Thor had set out to appease everyone- food that Jane happened to make for them, and Jane also happened to be in earshot of his father complaining. She was looking more and more hurt by the moment.

Six- All of the excitement was wearing his patience down to nothing, and he knew he was about to snap- he just hoped it wasn't at the wrong person.

Seven- he was pretty sure he just heard something that sounded like a lightbulb explode and then Tony apologizing.

Eight- thanks to everyone and their brother showing up, Loki was fairly sure he didn't know half of the people currently in his house, and that was going to be a very, very serious problem eventually.

Someone was going to die that night. Loki figured if he was lucky, it would be him doing the dying. It would be a nice reprieve.

He was just starting to contemplate setting the place on fire and risking being in huge legal trouble with fines when Darcy approached him, immediately grabbing his arm in order to hit her head on it repeatedly. "We've got half our friends in the know trying not to tell the people not in the know, Tony's… trying to prove he's a genius by inventing everything under the sun a la McGuyver… we picked one Hell of a circle of friends to bring to the family, huh?"

"Oh, the best."

The pair let a silence pass, and Darcy started formulating a plan in her head. After a few moments, she started realizing how dumb it really was and what Loki would probably say about it. She started chewing her lip and bouncing on the balls of her feet absentmindedly.

Loki looked her up and down and arched an eyebrow. "I know that twitch. You're planning something. What the Hell are you about to get us into?"

Darcy pursed her lips and crossed her arms over her chest, arching her own eyebrow.

Loki sighed. "I'm sorry. What's the plan?"

Darcy hesitated, then shrugged. "Well, what if we actually go through with this? I mean, we're not the first best friends to do it, right? What harm could it do to eliminate all the romantic mumbo jumbo, huh?"

Loki frowned. "Darce, where's the point? It's… I just don't lying to them- lying to my mother like this, and… even if… we've been over this. I don't want to hurt her."

"How's it hurting her if it works? All it is is a fancy ceremony and some awesome-ass gifts eventually."

"… It's a little different with my family," Loki replied. "You see, they know."

"So then it's just me that you have a problem with?" Darcy countered.

Loki gawked at her. "What- Darcy- no! Look, if it was any bloody person that I'd go through this with, it's you, but… … if you knew my family you'd understand. It's… marriage is a big to-do in my family, and if the caught wind that this wasn't one hundred percent genuine… I've told you most of this before. I've been the disappointment plenty, I don't want to be it again."

Darcy sighed, then hopped off the countertop. "You know, sometime you're gonna learn that you can't win 'em all, and there are some people out there who actually want you to make your parents happy and are gonna try to help you with that, but you know what? You have to let them first." She hurried off down the hallway.

Loki watched her leave, jaw dropped firmly for a while. "Dar- wha- I- Darcy!" He called. "What the Hell have I done this time?!" He looked around helplessly, stopping short when he saw Coulson and Steve watching him from the other corner of the room. "What?"

"You're an idiot," Coulson deadpanned before motioning at Steve for them to go back into the living room. Steve offered an apologetic smile in Loki's direction before following through.

Loki glared at Coulson's retreating back before Jarvis sauntered over, also having seen the whole thing."

"You need to go after her," Jarvis insisted, and Logan nodded in agreement.

"Well, what the Hell can I say after… that?" Loki demanded, waving his arms in the process. "What the Hell was that? Is it… her, time, or something? That was uncalled for."

Jarvis clenched his jaw, then finally broke. "I can't take this anymore- she fancies you, and shame on your for not picking up on it the way you are with her. You need to go after her and talk things about before this gets ugly."

"What gets ugly? You do something to Darce?"

Loki wanted to groan when Logan popped up from around the corner. He really didn't need the other man's input now, but apparently he was going to give it anyway. And why was he on Darcy's side?!

"Look, do you love her or not?" Jarvis cut in.

Loki looked at Logan for support, but he merely shrugged in response. "… … I, I don't know, eventually, maybe? Oh, who the Hell am I kidding? Yes. Yes I bloody do and I've just blown it by being an ass."

"How the Hell were you supposed to know?" Logan countered.

"Not exactly true, I thought she was being anything but secretive of it," Jarvis pointed out.

The other two frowned at him.

"She… might have made a drunken confession to me when you two were slightly on the outs," Jarvis admitted, then shook his head. "Look, you two are mad for each other, go after her. If you don't at least try, you'll regret it… or watch her fall for another man."

"Personal experience?" Logan asked.

"Pepper," Jarvis deadpanned.

"Ooooh," Logan nodded, taking a swig of his beer.

Of course, it was that moment that he and Loki had noticed Pepper in the archway, now gawking at Jarvis. Loki tensed and looked at him, and Logan took another swig.

Jarvis looked at them then frowned. "She's behind me, isn't she?"

"More like to your right but that doesn't change the fact she heard it," Loki replied.

Jarvis coughed and glanced at his watch. "Oh, look, I think I have to pick up Eugene and that Devon Umbridge fellow right about now, I totally forgot about that," he got up and without bothering to look at Pepper, made for the back door.

Pepper snapped out of her daze enough when he did so. "I- James! I- I try to check on Loki when I see you boys like that and I hear that?! You can't leave !" She hurried after him, standing in the doorway once he made his escape. "I- Jarvis!... … James?! … … … JAMES EDWIN JARVIS YOU GET BACK HERE AND FACE ME THIS INSTANT!" She took her high heels off and ran outside.

Loki and Logan stared at them before turning back to each other. "Man down," Logan muttered.

"He'll survive… maybe with a heel imprint or two, but he will," Loki replied. "Me, on the other hand…"

"Just go for it. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, you'll be back to prank wars and being best friends seconds later."

Loki sighed. "She's too good for me,"

"Kayla was too good for me. Our happy marriage and two kids later, here I am," Logan countered.

Loki frowned. "But-"

"Hey, Loke, can I talk to you?"

Loki turned around and tried to smile at Darcy weekly. "Sure…?" He let her lead the way outside, stopping momentarily to notice that Jarvis and Pepper were nowhere to be seen. He hoped both of them were calmly talking things out and had gone a fair bit away for privacy, but at the same time, he knew it could go any way. "So, what..?"

"Look, I know that was kinda much, but really I'm just trying to be an awesome friend here, and… well, I…"

Loki stared at her for a long while, losing all of what she was struggling to say in the process. She was looking out for him. That was all. She cared and she was doing all this for him. His heart clenched. And then made his decision. He wasn't going to talk his way in or out of this one. She didn't deserve that skill being used on her. He wasn't his father's son. And so without another thought, he yanked her forward and kissed her.

Darcy yelped into it before all but collapsing against him, perfectly content with the outcome.

After a few moments, Loki pulled back. "Look, I'm sorry about that and I swear I had that all planned diff-"

"Screw talking. Here, now, Idiot!" Darcy yanked him back down for another kiss and was all hands up until both of them heard Wade wolf whistle from one of the windows and call for them to get a room. Darcy waggled her eyebrows at Loki, almost willing to go with it, but Loki merely pulled her back towards the house, where he was pretty sure Tony had just made something else explode… … again.

Halfway across the house, Thor was reluctantly fishing out a ten dollar bill from his wallet and handing it over to Jane. "Should've known,"

Jane nodded, beaming as she took the money from him. "We totally started that. It always works. Have one couple get into an argument that doesn't help two friends that're connected to them, they bond over being annoyed about that, voila. We totally nailed it."

"Must've been the fake tears and screeching at me," Thor supplied.

"My acting stinks. Besides, who could ever really be mad at you?" Jane asked.

Thor beamed, then offered his hand. "Come on. Let's go see how they're mentally progressing after that."

"Sounds good to me."