DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO, although I wish I did.

Legend:

"Humans talking"

'Thinking'

*Writing*

"Non-human talking"

'Non-human thinking'

Jutsu

Flashback, Time Skip

(Cough and things like that)

Chapter 21: Idiot's Guide to Failure

Silence, that was all that could be heard as the group of Kumo ninja traveled through the forest. Not even the horse made a sound. It was so quiet that Naruto, and every other ninja could hear the beating of their bloody hearts, as it pushed blood throughout their body. The ninja looked around as it was far too quiet.

"Where are the birds?" asked one man to another as we hadn't encountered a single bird for the last five miles, something very strange indeed.

"Keep an ear out, I don't trust this fog." spoke the commander as a heavy fog started to roll in.

'Jeez, this is like a cliche ambush setting.' thought Naruto while looking around with extreme suspicion.

"And? I mean it is a perfect situation isn't it?" asked Kyuubi making Naruto silently face fault.

Fortunately for Naruto, and I guess unfortunately for you, the reader, no ambush took place as they wandered past the fog blanketed area. Naruto and the other ninja kept looking around, but never spotted any rebels, and they heard a bird after another mile.

"I guess we were just being scared for no reason." spoke a random ninja to the commander.

"I guess, we continue to the wes." rapped the commander.

"Oh god, you've been hanging around B-sama haven't you!" shouted a nearby ninja as the man continued to rap.

Naruto ignored them as he smiled and let loose a sigh of relief. The reason why is that they had just got into the two mile stretch of land that had very little fog at any time, and almost no area to hide for an ambush. Naruto was glad as it was nearing nightfall, and he was getting tired once more. Naruto slowly nodded off to sleep to the lull of the moving cart, after all he had been awake for nearly twenty hours, and a total of about two hundred miles. They had already passed the halfway mark around eighteen miles ago, and were making the last stretch till Naruto had to fight Yagura.

Naruto had been asleep for about three hours before something happened that many people later in history would call The Walking Typhoon. The reason was simple, Naruto had been kicked out from under the covers of the cart due to an ambush. Naruto yawned while growling, and he looked around seeing jutsus being thrown back, and forth some accompanied by kunai and others not.

Naruto was still tired, yet he was pissed, he had been woken up from his sleep. Naruto now understood why Kyuubi hated to be woken up, and why she was angry every time. Naruto looked around once more before flipping through hand signs groggily. No one even noticed Naruto for a full minute until he spoke.

"Whirlpool style: Oceanic Hydra!" whispered Naruto in a groggy yet angered voice so as no one would hear him. In a single moment dozens of large heads burst forth from the air. It seemed to phase into existence as the large maw and head began to grow a neck that had spines all along its spine. The large plethora of heads crashed into the ranks of both friend and foe. Blood painted the short grass, and limbs litted the air and ground as a large body that was easily the size of a large mansion stood behind Naruto. The large beast born of water had one hundred and sixtyeight heads attached, and each head had two eyes that gleamed a pale and sickly green. The razor sharp teeth made from water glowed a deep green as the 'teeth' spun around viciously. The beast roared into the sky, yet instead of a roar, the sound of waves thrashing about on the sea could be heard for miles.

The beast glanced around as Naruto yawned once more. Its sickly green eyes focusing on every ninja present. Naruto looked around before each head shot forth at the enemy ninjas this time. The enemy seeing what the heads were capable of quickly ran away. Just as a few were about to be caught the heads of the hydra suddenly just dropped to the floor soaking the battleground. The enemy ninja counted their stars for their luck as they continued sprinting away.

When the Kumo and Kiri ninja looked for Naruto they saw him snoring once more in the middle of the battleground whispering "ramen" and "Stop Kyu-chan" thus eliciting many sweat drops all around.

"Stupid blonde ninjas." whispered a Kiri ninja as they carefully placed him back in the cart to sleep.

"Didn't know that Kaminari could do that." whispered an older Kumo nin who had mocked Naruto when he said that he had killed the three ninja when he walked in with their heads attached to his belt.

"Has he always been that powerful?" asked Karui with a slight amount of edge in her voice.

"I don't think so." spoke Samui emotionlessly as her face set into one of calculation.

"If he hid this from him, then he might be hiding other things from us. If he happens to be hiding that he is part of the enemy then he could easily-" began Omoi on his rant of anxiety before Karui slammed a fist into the back of his head.

The rest of the day passed by with no event to note besides Naruto sleeping twelve hours and waking only for the last two hours of the journey.

They arrived in the village with very little celebration from the locals as they all held scowls on their face. The commander in charge of the convey however sent them off to a corner of the village to train and to sleep for the week to come before they would head back.

Naruto could be seen in the middle of a flat plain surrounded by forest as he meditated. He was trying to increase his weak sensor abilities, because right now he was merely running on instinct and Kyuubi's emotion detection. Granted the emotion detection would be way better than a chakra based sensor, but some people had little to no emotions, one such example is Itachi about fifty percent of the time.

Naruto sat stone still for several minutes, unknown to him he was naturally calling in small amounts of natural energy. He began to gain slight canine features such as elongated canines, and his three whisker marks started to darken and thicken. He sat there for a long while as he started to feel the chakra around him. Then all of a sudden two large sources of chakra that dwarfed everything in the city save a select few entered the village. Naruto's eyes shot open, he knew he was screwed if his guess was right.

"Attention men!" shouted an officer who walked throughout the camp "All shinobi please report to HQ!" shouted the man as all the present ninja started to walk to the place stated.

Naruto fell in line as he was near the center of the group with taller men around him obscuring him from vision. Naruto's hawk like gaze drifted around as he saw two people surrounded by several ninja approach. The first was a child looking person with sand colored hair, violet eyes, and a stitching like tattoo under his left eye. The second was a giant of a man with dark colored skin, whitish blonde hair, a goatee, two weird parts of a mustache but no center, golden gauntlets, and an open white robe showing off his muscles. A giant golden belt with the head of a boar blocked the sight of his abdomen muscles as his stern gaze drifted around the group of ninja who stood steady.

Naruto could just feel the power rolling off of the two people. He didn't need to be a sensor to tell they were powerful in their own right. Just like the Hokage of his village. Naruto stood straighter as he felt the scrutinizing gaze of the Mizukage and Raikage land upon him.

"You there in the center with the hiate 'round yer neck!" shouted the Raikage as everyone around Naruto took a huge step away from him. Naruto gulped before he turned, and stared upon the large man.

"Yes, sir!" shouted Naruto as he stood tense ready for an attack. If it came to it he would be hard pressed on a retreat. He could take one Kage if he took the person by surprise, but two was suicide for the boy.

"What's your name boy." spoke the Mizukage barely above a whisper, yet it was loud enough to be heard from Naruto's position.

"…" Naruto remained silent with a defiant glint in his eye. The Raikage's eye glinted with mirth before he dismissed it.

"What's yer name?" asked the Raikage with a commanding voice.

"Kaminari sir." spoke Naruto quickly as Yagura gave an angry glance to the boy, clearly displeased with the blatant defiance.

"And your reason for not answering me?" questioned the Mizukage heatedly as his hand drifted to his back slowly.

"I do not answer to you Mizukage." spoke Naruto emphasizing the last word.

The air began to grow thick with tension as Yagura drew his flower staff, and held an angered glint in his eye. A single moment, and then the tense air was broken by a laugh filled with amusement.

"Ah this one has spunk!" shouted the Raikage approvingly easily disarming the situation "I would think of you as a Kage candidate with that attitude, but sadly you aren't strong enough." spoke the Raikage with a sigh. He obviously knew of the horrors of a Kage. That damn blasted horror known as paperwork. Yagura nodded as he understood what the Raikage meant. However unlike the silence the kages and their guards expected they received slight giggles, snorts, and laughter.

"Is there something funny about what your Raikage just said?" asked one of the guards heatedly. Silence quickly fell upon the shinobi as everyone shut their lips tight.

"You" spoke the Raikage as he pointed to a shinobi who laughed the loudest "Why were you laughing?". The man whom was asked the question began to sweat visibly.

"U-um just that he is more powerful than he looks, especially if you wake him up during a nap." spoke the man while whispering the last part with a shiver.

"Oh? and pray tell how powerful he is?" spoke Yagure with a raised eye, yet his face held an emotion of disinterest.

"He could have single handedly defended the caravan from anything less than a Kage." spoke another man as he stood firm.

"And what jutsu did he use?" asked the Raikage with interest.

"It was like a water jutsu, but it held some examples of a wind style jutsu." spoke the same man as he stood rigid.

"A combination jutsu then?" asked the Mizukage as he gripped his staff hard waiting to pounce incase it was something else.

"Yes, what I used was a combination jutsu." spoke Naruto instantly defusing the tense air. 'Well a combination to an extent.' thought Naruto with an internal snicker.

"Ah that good, you'll have to teach the battalion about it sometime." spoke the Raikage as he eyed the Mizukage cautiously.

"Now then onto the real order of business. Tomorrow we will be marching towards the rebel camp as one of our scouts have found its location." spoke the Raikage "You are all dismissed for the day." spoke the Raikage as he went towards the head tent no doubt to speak with Yugito, Bee, and Darui.

Naruto drifted off to the very edge of the camp where he set his tent up making sure no one knew what he was doing. Naruto looked around real quick, and then made a mad dash for the forest going unnoticed by all, or so you, the reader, have been led to believe.

Naruto was several minutes into the forest as he looked around once more before seeing the coast was clear. He quickly went through a set of hand signs before saying "Summoning Jutsu" in front of him was a familiar small wolf.

"Yo, Ya rang?" asked the small yellow colored beast.

"Yes, I did. I need you to take this to Mei-chan, do you understand Subayai?" asked Naruto with a slight glare.

"Hai Hai, don't get your knickers in a twist." spoke Subayai with a tinge of a british accent in his voice this time.

"Good now get to it." spoke Naruto as the beast took off.

Naruto huffed before he took off in the opposite direction back to camp.

AN: Yes, yes, I know short ass chapter for such a late update. In my defense though I been hit with writer's block, and found tons of amazing stories that I've been reading. Aside from that I need some reviews please for ideas, in this case jutsu as I want something that is more of a single assassination technique, not my super flashy ones. Also if you can guess exactly why the chapter name is what it is you'll get a shout out, and I'll try to think of something else. See you all next time, oh fuck it Ja ne!