Cullenary Coupling

by BookishQua

What if Edward lied to everyone, & it really was all about Bella's scent? AU of entire TS on how, why, & when ExB fell in love using a completely different plot. Romance, hilarity, mystery and angst. Rated M. Canon Couples. Dark Edward, Lots of Snark

21. HOD pt 10 Heartbeats and Lullabies

This chapter is dedicated to Ksangi for a hilarious suggestion and to Siouxchef for her insightful reviews that inspire me to write. The suggested nicknames and behavior in part for the Predator in this chapter came from advice from Notmyself, Quirky Alice, JuJuRN40 and Bee. Thanks to you all.

AN: You all just blew me away with your amazing comments and suggestions on the last chapter. Thanks so much! I promised I'd make this chapter extra long, so I hope it lives up to your expectations. I should warn you when I make a promise I keep it. This chapter is about 75 pages. Also it has a whole heck of a lot going on in it, so I strongly recommend reading it more than once. I can promise you that many things that happen in this chapter you will be hearing about later on down the road.

We learned in the last few chapters that Bella has been sparking vivid visions in the Cullens, ones they don't understand, ones that bring back memories. We also saw the back story for the tangled history of the tribe and the Cullen family and how one awful night created years of simmering resentment. Edward and Jacob have had words – words that Edward has made formal by invoking the treaty and claiming Bella as his family. Carlisle has formally sent a message to Harry Clearwater that definitely gets the Quileute Chief's attention.

Special thanks to Fantasy Mother for beta service above and beyond the call of duty and to Oxymoronic8 for her helpful suggestions.

Many thanks to my validating beta vjgm.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Starched Shirt Edward, Paula Black, The O'Sheas, Sister Claire, the Predator, and Hezekiah are mine. So there.

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Heart of Darkness Part Ten - Heartbeats and Lullabies

I think this means that technically I just slept with my human in front of my family, shuddered through my mind as my awareness returned. Bewildered eyes opened to find myself in the forest near Ephraim's rock staring at the trees coated in the golden-colored moss. Fuming at being ripped from her amazingly fragrant warm arms, the desire to smash the rock into smithereens rushed through me. How did I go from the bliss of her embrace to a soggy forest in a cloud of mist? And I had a vague memory of my lips on her flesh - vampires can't have vague memories can they? I was in bed with a woman for crying out loud - a woman I wanted in my bed, thank you very much. How did I end up here?

The Predator appeared shirtless, wearing a tight pair of jeans, and barefoot. "What do you think you are doing?" I snapped. "Are you responsible for this?"

"Trying out different identities practicing for my real name? And no. I'm as confused as you are. I'm still partial to Caligula, so I'm trying to channel the beast-like nature of the caveVamp with my clothing." He sounded so excited, "Oh, and we definitely kissed her, with closed lips on the forehead," that last part was uttered in a disapproving tone.

"It would not be seemly to tongue her forehead in front of the entire family." I couldn't help the snark infusing my tone, "And I do agree with the beast-metaphor you are using in regards to Caligula. Apparently he attempted to have marital relations with large animals."

We both heard Starched Shirt Edward screaming from the other room, "No licking the little one in front of an audience without sacred vows and no bestiality. Absolutely not. We will not take the name of an incestuous deviant! The Holy Father would not approve."

The Predator sulked, looking depressed. Since he had been so helpful to me lately, I felt the need to reward him. "Take heart Jugurtha, we'll remind him next time of some of the more naughty things some past popes have been caught doing, like having children or starting wars."

"What did you just call me?" The Predator blinked in confusion.

"Jugurtha. It's your new name. I think even Starched Shirt Edward would approve."

Starched Shirt Me emerged from the study clasping the works of St. Thomas Aquinas in one hand and a large cotton shirt in the other which he handed to the Predator, blinking at him. Sighing, the Predator donned the clothing and said, "So are you going to vote this name down too? And is someone going to tell me who Jugurtha was?"

"Jugurtha was a famous king of Numidia who plagued the Romans around 113 BCE. He literally had the reputation for being unstoppable and his ruthlessness was well known. In part, he caused the fall of the empire. It's a good name for someone who has shown such tenacity." I clasped him on the shoulder. "I could not have endured that past few minutes without your help." Shamefaced, I gulped. "You definitely have earned the name and my thanks."

Jugurtha blinked back tears of his own. Starched Shirt Edward wiped his eyes with the back of his hands and said, "I would have preferred something simply like, "Oh holy one," or Simon, but I approve of that name. It is fitting. And Aquinas says that even heathens, if they led a life of virtue, could gain paradise. Jugurtha fought against oppression and showed tenacity in his death. I vote yes."

The Predator Jugurtha smiled at us, cleared his throat and said, "Thank you both. Not having a name was bothering me. Now we have to figure out where we are. And I sense we are not alone."

"Do either one of you have any idea how we can get back or where we are?" my voice rose in panic. Morosely, they both shook their heads "no" simultaneously. Desperately, I sank to pinching my arm, and alas, found that I did not return into the presence of my human. Then again; with the hate Lady Fate blasted at me, yanking me from my dear little one's arms perhaps was predictable, I grumbled. From behind me, I heard a familiar gravely voice clearing his throat and turned, schooling my features into a quizzical mask. Mentally, I asked Starched Shirt Me and Jurgurtha Predator to retire.

"Really. It's been too long." I greeted Hezekiah with arms widespread in a welcoming gesture as he grumbled standing there clutching his walking stick.

"You told me to find a better idiot and I did," he cackled.

"Are you telling me that I'm the new idiot?" How, precisely, was this fair?

"In some aspects of your life, the label idiot fits you son, which surprises me considering all that fancy book learning you got," he softly replied peering up at me tapping his index finger to his head.

I harrumphed.

He waved a hand and a plush leather chair appeared out of the thin air to his right. Placing his free hand on the arm Hezekiah wobbled over and sat slowly. Expelling a breath in happiness he leaned against the back of the chair with a smile on his wizened face. Staring, I wondered at the incongruity of an overstuffed chair in the middle of the forest sitting amidst the bright yellow evergreen violets that sparkled on the ground like gold dust. Hezekiah, at my expression, grouched, "It's my reality, Edward; I get to sit if I want to. I'm old." He took out a pipe, stuffed it with tobacco and lit it with a zippo lighter.

"You were merely 78 when you passed away. I'm older. And, as you're quite dead, you shouldn't feel old."

"Is that so?" he left the part where he commented that you couldn't tell my age by my behavior unspoken. But I heard his thoughts regardless. Damn him.

"And how is it that you are a ghost and smoking?" I huffed in annoyance.

"So says the undead guy who's currently sleeping," Hezekiah puffed once and admitted, "It's a bad habit I know; but look at it this way, it can't kill me." He chuckled. "Have a seat." A leather chair appeared out of nowhere behind me. I elected to take it; ignoring his mistaken assumptions about my intelligence and maturity. Besides, his assassination of my character aside, I had bigger problems.

"Don't mind if I do, thank you kind sir. Two visits in one day. I am honored indeed." The chair actually felt quite good to my surprise. Nonchalantly, I uttered the words fearing the reply, "My heart is beating, but I don't feel any differently. Did your heathen magic turn me human again?" I curved my lips into a wry grin.

"I wish I knew," Years of pretense kept my face blank and I pantomimed being calm with suddenly composed features and still hands. Perhaps a group of Aztecs became lost one day and wandered up to Washington State to resettle hundreds of years ago? He should have simply torn my heart out when he reanimated it again.

"......listen.....Edward......hearing?" He waved his calloused palm in front of my face.

I had trouble focusing on his words, and blurted instead, "Why do I have a heart beat?"

"Beats the heck out of me, Edward." He offered me a sympathetic glance. "Considering that these powers were meant for a human, I figure it's trying to adjust to you. At first, using the energy exhausted me. Edward, you wielded more power than I've ever seen or heard of in our legends in the span of a couple of minutes. Had you been human, you'd probably be dead. So your immortal body needs to rest. I'll wait here with you and we'll chat while that happens."

"But I need to ....." My singer needed me. I had to help her. I couldn't just lay there doing nothing. Besides, every second here I missed out on quality singer pressed tightly against my flesh time. Perhaps I should rename that priceless singer pressed against my flesh radiating "scent"-astical fragrances and driving me insane time? And it was killing me, metaphorically speaking, to sit here not knowing if I had truly become a mortal man again. Manners required I be patient, but I'd waited over 80 years for a moment like this. Then there was all that business about Jasper's vision possibly mentally scarring her for life. Psychological trauma would most definitely impair her health, and her ability to emit her scent. I could not stand for that. I had to help my human to smell for me, not sit here gulping trying not to vomit in another dimension. Wait....would she still smell as good to me if I were human? A rumble of my stomach distracted me, as my mouth began to water with bile.

"Could you at least have done something about the stench? Please, you made a chair appear out of nowhere. Have a heart - even if I don't?" have one that may or may not be functioning, I left unspoken.

"You and all your vampire strength can't stand a little odor?" He chided. "All power requires that you give something up to get it. You and I are stuck reeking around each other son, sorry. I thought smoking might distract you." He set aside his pipe.

"How . . ."

"Hush, and listen to me." Hezekiah interrupted my newborn protest. "I have to instruct you on how to use your abilities and access the memories. But I can't do it all at once."

"Are you telling me that you're going to take control of my body whenever the fancy strikes you?" The very idea of being turned into a zombie by a werewolf turned my stomach. Maybe it was part of what I had to sacrifice in order to become mortal again, I pondered.

"No no no, nothing like that, and I'm not controlling your body. Yeesh. Since you've managed to do the impossible and sleep, I'm taking the chance to visit. You clearly don't know how to use the power and this time you were very lucky and no one got hurt."

The idea of harming someone alarmed me and competed with the rising hope that I now had a soul. He did say that I hadn't harmed anyone though.....Perhaps using the powers could help complete my transformation? "Do you understand the powers?"

"It's hard to say what they all are because so much of them were bound in stories. I'm not sure which ones were true and which ones were tall tales. I know that I had the ability see the future - but it happened only rarely."

"Is that why you said Gregory Clearwater had to live 5 years?"

"Yes, I knew his son would lead the tribe. And he was born 5 years later. And he's a good man. Had Gregory died that night, Billy Black would be the chief, and that would have been a disaster. To access the memories, you have to think of my face. It will be a jumble for a while."

"Anything else I need to know about?"

"Well, yeah, there is one thing....he shifted nervously in his seat."

"What?"

"You have a new pet. And she's a wee bit protective."

"A what? Like a dog?"

His brow lowered as he frowned, "No, considering you wanted to kill all the dogs in Forks not too long ago even God wouldn't trust you with one. Or a cat for that matter," he snorted, glaring at me.

"I was concerned for the welfare of my girlfriend and perhaps over reacted." I paused as Hezekiah snorted loudly, again, "Do you intend to inform me what it is?"

"By tradition I am forbidden from identifying her. She might show herself to you if she likes you. And you have to take care of her because if she does take to you she'll bond and will be upset and downright cranky if she feels ignored. She hasn't had anyone since I died, and she's lonely. I don't know if you'll even be able to see her, since by tradition only one of Quileute blood or bond can."

"What do you mean bond? And how do I meet this new pet?"

"It's a ceremony that does not make someone a member of the tribe. It just shows to that person that they are important. As for your pet, she'll find you. Don't worry. How do you think you were able to see so much about Jacob this afternoon? She's your new set of eyes and senses. Your minds are already linked which is a good sign. She's testing you out."

He acted like he heard someone calling his name and moved to the edge of his seat leaning on his stick. "Time runs differently here and I don't have much of it."

"I see."

"No, actually, you don't, and that is the problem, Edward. You have to find the new shaman as quick as you can."

"What criteria do you use?" I had never searched for a holy person before and I eagerly anticipated informing the elders that I had been granted tribal sacred powers by their long dead shaman. Clearly, they would be overwhelmed with gratitude. I envisioned them hopping about with glee, throwing rose petals in my wake.

"That's easy, since none of my line exist any more you have to find the person who sacrificed the most for the sake of the tribe. Since you can read minds that won't be too hard."

"Why can't you tell me?"

"You have to make the decision. I can't now. Although I'm hoping you choose wisely considering the treaty."

"How do you know I'll even do that? Now that I have your powers, I could just walk away you know," I needled him.

"I know you'll do it because despite all that poppycock you're blathering, I could tell when I first saw you that you understood all about sacrifice and pain. And deep down inside, Edward you are a decent man and will do your best to keep your word, no matter what you might say otherwise." Curses. The man knew me. Sort of. Heck.

"Fine. I'll do it." I glowered.

"Good." He gave me a fond glance.

"Would you mind telling me what I did with the power moments ago? I'm confused."

Hezekiah scratched his chin, "Well, lemme see. You managed to stop your sister from snacking on your little missy by freezing her in place," he paused and I cringed at the mental image of Mary Alice with black eyes that he had in his mind.

"But I almost killed my girlfriend myself," I whispered mortified flinching at the remembrance of my lips at her neck.

"Well, yes, you can protect her from them to an extent, but not from yourself. That's not how the power works. You have to exert your own free will. Sorry." He sounded like a politician explaining the fine print in a bill after it had been passed.

"But the blood lust faded in Alice and I. "

"Yes, because the vision gave you other things to focus on that were even more powerful that bloodlust."

"I've never heard of anything that could outweigh the pull of bloodlust like that."

"Now you have," The shaman's voice pulled me away from my fears. "then, because you seem to be the dotting the i's and crossing the t's kind of person, you put a barrier up over your little missy's doorway so that the rest of your family could not come inside until the vision ended and they felt no bloodlust."

"I suspect that explained the crashing noises?"

"Sort of. You did it during the vision and moments ago when you fell asleep."

Alarmed, I barked, "Are you telling me someone in my family wanted to drink her just now? And I'm here with you?" I started to hyperventilate.

"Edward, calm down. You and she are both fine. You put up a barrier around the two of you before you went to sleep, I think, because you felt yourself losing control and wanted to make sure she was safe until you regained it. Your family can't separate either one of you at present." He shook his head at me and muttered, "You're a bit protective of the girl, but that's alright. Don't let her fool you; she's a lot like her Grandmother." That part frightened me every bit as much as the idea of my family snacking on her while I idled here.

"In what way? I only met her Grandmother on the day of her birth."

"Well, I never met her considering I died shortly after. But I've watched her over the years every now and then. She's got her tenacity. And she's quiet, too." Well, that didn't sound so bad. And having her be quiet to me was a good thing. I didn't have to talk as much. I did wonder why all of a sudden if he didn't know her he brought up the subject of her Grandmother.

"Did you see the vision?"

Hezekiah trembled for a moment and his voice quavered when he answered, "Mercy yes. I found it horrifying to watch and I felt everything you did. That bloodlust was worse than my death. Those poor men. Your poor brother. I don't go tripping about in your mind. You sent those thoughts to me when you came here." We sat in silence for a moment.

"Are you in communication with Genevieve O'Shea Swan?" I hoped for some answers.

"No, the afterlife doesn't work like that. I'm with my family and loved ones. I'm not sure what it means. Have you had any others?" Briefly I described all the visions and the accompanying sensations as he muttered under his breath rocking in his chair in concentration.

"Do you see why we are so confused?"

"That I do, my boy," Considering that I was older than him I found that amusing, "I'll have to give this some consideration. Clearly, you need to keep a close eye on your girl. Her grandmother had a devil of a temper, just so as you know. I'll come to check on you later. Bye, son. Oh, and I'm still happy about that thought." He and his chairs vanished and vision me fell on my vision behind in the vision leaves looking at the vision Silver firs and Western hemlocks that smirked at me. With a jolt, I fell back into my body.

Eyes shut, breathing like a human, paralyzed; I could feel my heart beating. The sensation of possessing a mortal frame crashed against me - memories I had forgotten until now. Warmth radiated through me. I could hear and see the people around, yet did not use anyone's mind to gain this perspective. I suspect that my mental abilities had returned but my now human body had yet to recover, I thought with glee. My singer and I reclined on a large bed I had never seen that had seized territory in the middle of my capacious room in our own house outside of Forks. Locked in an embrace, my singer lay flush against my body, adorable as usual, sleeping peacefully. From the moment I had first awakened to my immortal life, I can honestly say I have never felt this comfortable. Had I been able to, I would have danced with joy. I could feel my heat pumping human blood. After eighty years, I never thought I'd ever smell my own unique blood scent as it pumped through me. The air tasted different as I breathed in her fragrance that I could still smell. Perhaps I had kept all of my immortal senses? Venom swirled in my mouth but surely that would change as my heart continued beating and my transformation concluded. After all, it had taken three days to become a vampire. God had given a worthless wretch like me a second chance at a human life, and I planned on taking it gladly. Those dreams I never admitting to having of a mortal existence and what I would do if I happened to acquire one - having a wife and children and living in my own home spoiling my family - flashed through my mind. My singer looked good wearing my ring holding a baby laughing at me under her lashes with rosy cheeks as I entered the house of my hope and dreams.

"Run. Sweater. Tree." My human babbled and started to wheeze in earnest. I could tell from her heart that she would awaken soon.

I however, was still suspended in a sleep-like state, although I lowered the barrier around us at her words. The green light surrounding us faded to the relieved sighs of my family. She awoke in my arms and squeaked at the sight of my bemused parents, and Alice blinking at her from the foot of the bed. The exquisite sensation of the blood pooling under her skin as she blushed washed over me as her scent increased in strength. I reflexively tightened my arms around her slightly, and sighed, rubbing my hand through her hair. I sensed the absence of Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett. Wide-eyed my singer whispered to Alice, "Where am I?" Somewhere in my brain, I smirked because she didn't attempt to stop my hand caressing her tresses.

"Honey, you're in Edward's bedroom at our house. You've been asleep for quite some time," Mother walked over to her side and patted her on the arm. I could sense they had turned the heat on in the house to make it comfortable for us.

"Did I make him sick?" my singer scrutinized me in panic, still sussurating despite my family's use of a normal vocal volume. She couldn't move from my embrace although smugly, I observed, she didn't try too hard.

Esme patted her shoulder and stroked her hair as Father spoke, "Edward suffered a seizure. Once the worst of his fit had passed, we placed him beside you to administer medication. You were having a nightmare at the time and cried out in your sleep, Bella. Edward held you. He became combative if we tried to separate you both, which is a side effect of his condition, although it has never happened with him. We did not want to risk your safety so we moved you back to the house. He's been sedated and we are waiting for him to awaken." From Carlisle's mind, I had the image of my family lifting her mattress and running at vampire speed through the woods with Emmet and Jasper holding us aloft like a dinner tray. They couldn't get past the green barrier so they literally rolled us from her mattress to this bed before returning it back to her house.

"Why aren't we in the hospital?" The patter of her heartbeat indicated her concern, though she gazed at me while speaking. She appeared alarmed for my sake as her hand felt my cheek. I knew Mother hovered ready to snatch her hand if it ventured too close to my mouth.

"Because he does not require hospitalization, nor do you. I can easily treat you both from here. There was another earthquake in the area and your house needs to have the glass replaced again," Father said.

"Another?"

"I'm afraid so. This time over 5 miles of Forks suffered the effects. It's made national news." Inwardly, I winced. How, if I had not climaxed, did I manage to make the earth move again? I was, unfortunately, very sure on the not a drop of venom leakage part. This required further study. Alice's thoughts indicated that she pondered it as well.

"Is my Dad's house damaged?"

"Not anything that can't be fixed in an hour. My other children are seeing to it at present." Carlisle soothed.

I could feel sensation returning to my body and actually sensed pain much like I did when I was a human. My leaden lids lifted wondering if I had hallucinated everything until they met the concerned eyes of my flustered human, peering up at me shyly. I could feel the warmth from her skull as her hair trailed through my fingers. As my family's relieved thoughts resounded in my mind the memory of Jasper's vision flashed, "Are you well?" My voice cracked as shaking hands lifted to graze her temples. Something unfathomable flashed in her eyes for a moment before she beamed touching my right hand with her own tentatively.

"Edward?"

"Yes, my Queen?"

"My Grandmother warned me about guys like you..." her expressive eyes held a glimmer of mirth. She shook my hand on the words "guys like you" thrice.

"Like me?" I arched a brow affecting as if I weren't aghast at waking up with her in a bed in my own room surrounded by my gawking family. "And what, pray tell, did your genius Grandmother say?"

"Um...that I should definitely be on my guard for smooth talkers that get me so relaxed that I wake up not knowing where I am and what we did. Do you make a habit of this with women?" she pretended to look scandalized. My family chortled.

"I'll never tell." Her face wore that look on it that I associated with pain, "How bad is your headache?" I moved my hands from her temples to trace her skull. She flinched and displayed a sudden fascination with the collar of my shirt.

"I suppose I could try that medication," she whispered. Her head must really hurt because she hated admitting pain.

Carlisle took the bottle and I reluctantly unwrapped my arms from her so she could sit up and drink her water with her tablets. After a quick examination, he let Esme and Alice help her to the restroom to take a shower. I felt relieved that in my mindless state I had not harmed her.

Once the door closed Carlisle said at vampire pitch, "Edward, you scared us there for a moment," an understatement if ever there was one, "How are you feeling?"

"Almost human," I said with a genuine smile. I knew he could hear my heart, and wondered why he didn't notice my change.

"Son, a vampire you are still." He said gently. I would clearly have to convince them all that I had done the impossible. I had to be careful not to sound too happy, as I did not want to risk offending them.

"But I have a heartbeat and I'm warm!" I held my hand out to him to feel, using a curious tone.

"In all my years I've never seen someone's heart start back up like that, but your transformation altered your fundamental nature. I don't even understand how your heart can be functioning with your system."

Clutching onto my dream like a desperate man hanging by his fingertips over a treacherous ravine, I blurted, "Perhaps I'm a new form with vampire senses and still human?" Even to me my voice sounded pathetic, yet terrified.

Without warning, I noticed my beating heart started slowing. Carlisle sat by me on the bed. We listened as it ever so gradually slowed. Five agonizingly long minutes later it stopped with a mournful final solitary thud. The line from T.S. Eliot's the Hollow Men came to mind, "This is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a whimper." In disbelief, I stared out the window fighting to remain calm schooling my features, and shut my anguished eyes hiding them from my observant Father. The last time I had slept, I had awakened to discover my soul ripped from me. This time, upon arising from my unnatural slumber, I had hoped against all reason to be truly human. Without a word, Carlisle put his arm around me and laid my head on his shoulder. It reminded me of my irrational overemotional days as a newborn. Esme used all her acting skill to stay composed while helping my singer bathe as did Mary Alice. Their thoughts of sympathy lashed at me. Awkwardly, I patted my Father's arm and stood.

"Please excuse me," escaped from my frozen lips in my impassive face. I remembered to smile slightly. All at once, I felt the need for an evening constitutional. Every bit of acting ability I possessed permitted me to calmly perambulate down the stairs and out of the house. I maintained that leisurely pace until I hit the usual spot where I always began running. Feeling almost free, I started to run at my usual lope. As soon as I exited their hearing range, as if chased by a legion of demons from hell, the second my feet touched the earth I sprinted. With bittersweet regret, I found that I could run faster than ever before, most likely due to my own human blood rushing through my system. It strengthened me without transforming my eyes to a newborn red, I theorized in a vitriolic rant.

When I reached my favorite thinking place, my legs collapsed like a sandcastle in a strong wind. Although I desperately wanted to, I could not summon tears, and I rocked back and forth holding my head in my glowing hands. That hated scratch began in my throat and in fury I drank from four animals. Ten minutes later I realized I had to regain my composure. Otherwise, Carlisle would feel guilty for transforming me.

Dressed in black from head to toe Jurgurtha Predator appeared and squatted beside me, putting his hand around my shoulder. "We can't stay gone long. They'll come looking. Hide the carcasses." He was right. I nodded at him and he left for once entering the library and closing the door behind him.

I could not burden Father or the family with the pain that was mine alone to bear. I had created so much turmoil lately with my preoccupation with my singer's welfare. I feared this could push them over the edge and they'd want me gone. Once I managed to harness control of my emotions to my satisfaction, I returned to the house and Father's office wearing a serene mask. Carlisle patted my arm.

"I apologize for my behavior. My emotions feel so strange. I think it's this Quileute human power affecting me." Even to me I sounded like an automaton. Esme and Alice were helping my singer to dress and drying her hair. I could tell from the beating of her heart and her scent wafting from two floors above that the pain medication had entered her blood stream.

"Edward, I am especially impressed you managed to resist your singer considering the circumstances. Can you tell me what happened right before you lost consciousness?" My Father tried to cheer me up with pride.

"I feared she had experienced Jasper's vision and when he started impacting us with his feelings.... The idea of vampire emotions coursing through her human system was more than I could tolerate. I wanted to make her comfortable and calm and I felt this blinding light through me and something jolted through me. I fell asleep and dreamt of Hezekiah lecturing me about using the gift." My Father kept his mind blank. Mary Alice and my Mother concentrated fiercely on the needs of my human. I heard my singer say, "Edward seems so different. Is he ok?"

Mary Alice answered, "Today is the anniversary of his birth father's death. It's very hard on him. Edward's parents passed away within days of one another. He had an illness that impacted his memory so his loss is compounded. He only remembers them in flashes." Carlisle's voice dragged me from monitoring the conversation.

"Are you in physical pain?"

"I have a headache."

"We'll talk about this later after you've had some time to think about it. The past two hours have been ghastly for everyone, especially you, Jasper, and Alice. Your brothers and sister have repaired Bella's house. They should return within the next few minutes. That was very good planning of you to have copies of everything stored far away." I could tell he was fishing. With everything that had occurred, the very idea of him discovering about the unfortunate inadvertent venom leakage incident numbed my mind.

Casually I responded, "Given the earthquake could happen again, I knew I should have replacements." Well, it was the truth. I certainly hoped to have another orgasm. Once we married. And then I'd have to live in the wilderness with her. Or camp as I couldn't shatter canvas. I moved my mind from its salacious thoughts as my singer emerged from the upstairs dressed in her jeans and a lightweight long sleeved shirt. Esme had cleaned them and I kept my features calm trying not to growl seeing her wearing inappropriate attire. Now I understood again why my parents had the heat turned up so high. They were trying not to embarrass her.

We showed my human around the first story of the house. Mother told her that the family had dined earlier. She knew I would insist on eating with her so two plates sat on the table. Making excuses, Mother disappeared into the study with Father and Mary Alice. Dining with my human had never been a physical process that I enjoyed; although I had managed to act my way around the agony. Half an hour ago the wistful thought had flashed across my mind wondering what it would be like to actually taste food again and enjoy it.

Stiffening my spine, Starched Shirt Edward encouraged me as I walked with her to the table, "Forbearance is a virtue." Even he looked miserable.

The Predator Jugurtha stood by him and consoled me, "Your acting ability has served you well these past years. Tell your family it's the powers making you feel this way. They'll not be able to gainsay you." I nodded mentally at them both. Noticeably, my family kept their thoughts blocked and actually it made me grateful.

I gritted my teeth preparing for the worst as the food's stench hit me. If I could handle Jasper's vision and the illusion of my humanity returning this should be a cakewalk. I pulled her chair away from the table and seated her as a gentleman should. It echoed our lunches in the cafeteria at school. As we partook of the Dijon chicken with pasta Esme had prepared, I noticed my singer stared at the table in fascination. Perhaps she liked the wood? Since she was quiet like I, eating in silence did not bother me, and tonight, of all nights, I did not even know what to say. I noticed as time progressed she seemed to become more uncomfortable.

Mary Alice finally whispered from the next room - "Edward, I think you should practice your conversation skills. Perhaps you might mention school?" Desperate, I blurted, "So we should work to catch you up on your schoolwork."

The mention of academic torture - I mean high school - enlivened her, "That would be fine. Are my books here?" she seemed relieved.

"I am not sure. I'll have to check." Considering I had been unconscious when we were transported here like upholstery, I had no idea what had been removed from the Swan house.

On that note, Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie barged into the house. My giant brother took one look at the food on my plate and the determined set in my jaw and mentally called me PukeWard. He shuddered in disgust as I chomped my chicken. Emmett held my human's backpack. They all looked relieved to see me "normal" in their minds. Still fragile, Jasper thought out his love to his mate who returned it unconditionally. I wondered what that felt like, I contemplated without envy, genuinely curious. My human, I could not envisage her offering me solace if she realized the pretend me acted like an edifice for the skeleton of a soul.

With humor, Emmett teased, "Hi Bella, it's good to see you conscious. I'm Emmett, and this is Rosalie and Jasper." My empath brother kept a healthy distance from her and smiled trying not to look at her like she had morphed into an emotional leviathan. Rosalie smiled at her from the other side of her husband.

My singer had finished her plate and politely declined seconds. It had been an hour since she had taken her pain medication for her headache. Her eyelids started to droop. It was late at night, around nine or so.

Mary Alice entered the room. "Bella you looked exhausted. Let's get you back upstairs, and we can work on our schoolwork tomorrow."

"I can't kick Edward out of his own bed." She seemed embarrassed.

"Bella, you don't need to worry. He'll bunk with us." Emmett walked around her nonchalantly to my side. He cuffed my head as I glared at him when her eyes were looking at Mother. Mentally mother told me, "Edward I ordered the bed last week. It's about time you had one. We have to pass as human."

The Predator's voice emanated from the dark corner, "We need to refocus back on our singer. She requires attention. Our needs will abide." Excellent advice.

At vampire pitch I responded, "Thank you Mother for thinking of me. The bed is perfect." Perfect with my singer in it. And now my sheets would be imbued with her scent. And the comforter. And the pillows. Oh, how she spoiled me so. Although I was bitterly disappointed at not being human, I tried to see the good points of my miserable life: my family and my singer. Right now I inhaled to recall all the reasons why she blessed my days. If I could get her to drool a few times on my bed or better yet; me, that would be the crowning achievement and I would be in scent heaven. The idea occurred to me then that perhaps there existed some connection between using the power and her that turned me human. I remember her pendant had flared with a white light. I would have to experiment further when she rested. Her pain medication would ensure that she'd sleep even sounder than usual.

My singer rose from her chair and walked slowly to the staircase. After one flight of steps she started to wobble, reaching for the rail. Two flights of this would give me a nervous breakdown. "I think your medication has made you dizzy. May I please carry you?"

"Are you ok to do so? You had a seizure a little while ago." Her tone diplomatic, I marveled at her consideration.

"I haven't had an episode like that in ages and I feel fine. I wouldn't offer otherwise, as I'd never risk your safety." Well, I wouldn't, sort of. I'd think about risking her safety all the time considering my fantasies, but I'd never consciously risk it.

With a nod she consented, staring at the ground. She trembled slightly for reasons I failed to appreciate. When she continued to shake, I breathed on her six times. I couldn't have my human upset. Dazed yes. But upset? Definitely not. Maybe she feared I'd drop her and fall on the ground twitching? She relaxed after a few breaths so I felt better.

The accusation might have been leveled at me that I walked too slow carrying her up the staircase. It wasn't the sensation of my emotions I insisted, that drew me, although I did feel fondly for her. No, instead it was the opportunity to wear her scent on me as much as possible. I should call it my scent, because I did have a right to it as Nature designed her and her aroma with me in mind.

"Way to take forever lover boy," Emmett whispered at vampire pitch.

I ignored him. This was only the second time I had carried her while she was conscious, an anniversary of sorts. My speed made me considerate of her tender feelings. The fact that she fell asleep on the way upstairs was an added bonus. Now I didn't have to struggle to converse with her.

Mary Alice pulled back the sheets, and I laid her on the right side of the bed. She looked like she belonged there the primitive side of me declared. I left as she briefly awoke while Mary Alice helped her change, and joined my parents in the living room.

Thinking of Jacob, Mother said, "After what I saw today lurking outside her door, I would feel better if you called the Clearwaters." Esme kissed Carlisle's lips as they snuggled on the couch.

"Of course, you are correct." Carlisle dialed Harry Clearwater's home phone and offered him a mild greeting. "Good evening, Chief Clearwater, I assume you've seen the film I sent?" Carlisle's mild tone conveyed warmth and sincerity, attributes that served to magnify Clearwater's anxiety.

"We had nothing to do with that; although we are concerned about Bella's involvement with your family." Clearwater's defensive tone indicated his ploy.

"We have the ability to read minds Chief Clearwater and know Jacob Black lied," Carlisle ignored Harry Clearwater's gasp continuing, "we recognize you as a man of honor. Did your father ever tell you why we made the treaty with your tribe?"

"Yes." Now he sounded cautious, "we were outnumbered at the time and couldn't afford to fight."

"That's factually inaccurate. Ephraim Black, and several of the tribal elders were friends. The entire reason behind the treaty was because of our laws that all of our kind must follow."

"Laws? You have them?" I tried not to be offended at his tone.

"First, tell no one. Second, you are responsible for anyone you turn's behavior. Third if a human does learn of your nature you either kill or immediately turn that person. Fourth, and most importantly, failure to abide by the rules results in death for all involved. When we encountered Ephraim we broke our own laws to form a treaty. Your entire tribe at the time was warned that a key part of the treaty entailed keeping silence about our nature. Do you have today's paper in front of you?"

"How did we go from a history lesson to current events? And who would enforce these laws?" Clearwater snapped as he grabbed the Peninsula Daily News.

"Did you see the story about the elementary school in Los Angeles that exploded?"

"Yes, my heart goes out to all those families."

"A newborn vampire attacked the school in Los Angeles. The Volturi are our rulers and enforce our laws, and were in town on a mission. To prevent exposure, they systematically killed every child and adult and then incinerated the building. They also eradicated the entire coven in Los Angeles to set an example. It took them four minutes to kill 800 humans and no one suspects a thing."

"Oh dear Lord." Clearwater's voice shook.

"Jacob muttered under his breath as he left the hospital waiting room that my son was a cold one and dead. Do you understand if our secret became known not only would we die, but your entire tribe as well down to the last child?" Clearwater gulped. Carlisle's gentle tone made the message all that more frightening.

"I had no idea, no one ever told me. I'll handle the Blacks, and I apologize for their behavior. Wait, your son called Bella his girlfriend," Clearwater whispered in panic.

"He also formally declared her a member of our family to Jacob. And I am reiterating it to you as per the treaty."

"You can't claim her. She's like a daughter to me." Clearwater's voice broke.

"The treaty does not stipulate who can and can not be claimed as a family member. And a daughter to you she shall ever remain. She is ignorant of our nature and will continue to remain so. Edward took this step to protect her from Jacob, not keep her from your family, although his intentions toward her are serious and honorable. We are doing all that we can to maintain our obligations and require assurance from you that you can handle the Blacks."

Clearwater felt like his heart was going to explode as he rubbed his chest. The thought of that little girl in their hands, and the treaty bound and gagged him. He wiped away tears. "This is impossible for me. I love that girl." His voice broke.

"Chief Clearwater, my son worships the ground Bella walks on and I have never seen him so devoted to another woman. He would never dream of harming her in any manner. She will still be involved in your life to the degree that you permit her." That stretched the truth a bit. I worshiped her scent, not the ground, and I often dreamed of harming her in various ways, not that my Father knew. Thank God.

"I'll handle the Blacks. I give you my word. Your boy better not hurt her," his voice trailed.

"As a father, I give you my promise to watch over them as well." Carlisle wished him a good night and ended the call.

Rosalie commented to Father, "He seems like a good man and he clearly loves Bella."

"Yeah, I think we can work with him." Emmett agreed.

"It's not like he can do anything otherwise," Jasper, astute as ever, added.

"We will not have a problem from him or his family," Mary Alice predicted peering into the future seeing the Clearwaters from behind visiting our house.

As Emmett and Mary Alice and even Rosalie joined in unraveling our conundrum, I reached out with my mind to the Quileute lands. They were meeting at Mr. Clearwater's house - all the elders save Billy, that is. Harry Clearwater, from his thoughts, genuinely loved my human. I savored the images that came from him of my singer growing into the enchanting woman she now was. He thought fondly of how she had spent almost the entirely of her monthly vacations during the past summers with his wife and children. He had a particular prized memory of Bella at ten with cake laughing while sticking frosting on Leah, who shrieked in laughter as she ducked. His thoughts turned to the Blacks. The elders agreed with his suggestion. John Quill decided Billy Black should receive a phone call rather than a formal public trial. They called him using a speakerphone.

As Billy spluttered in outrage on the line, Clearwater pronounced Mr. Black and his entire family under probation for five years. Further, he threatened them with banishment from the tribe if they continued with their plotting concerning the Swans, who were to be left alone. He concluded reminding him of the treaty. Red-faced, with blood vessels popping on his forehead, Billy Black from Jacob's panicked mind appeared on the verge of a heart attack. Harry hung up the phone without a word. How ironic that the progeny of Gregory had more honor than possessed by Ephraim's. I turned my attention to our house as our parents summoned us to the table.

As she slept upstairs, we discussed the visions. Carlisle started, "Her Grandmother is trying to send us a message, although the clues are peculiar."

"Today's vision ended on two notes: the face of the blond vampire and the O'Shea's," I mused.

Jasper's face twisted in memory, "I witnessed her dismemberment and burning decades ago so the message can't be about her."

Alice speculated, "Maybe it's something about the O'Shea's. Genevieve held an apple and then took her brother's hand. And they walked away into a forest."

Esme asked, "Was there anything special about the apple or the forest?"

Squinting, she considered the memory, "The fruit had a funny color. I don't pay attention to human food but I could research the types online. The forest was oak"

"Is there an oak forest on the peninsula that Bella might go to?" Carlisle asked. We searched our minds but failed to come up with an answer.

"Maybe we're paying too much attention to details. Big picture wise, what does Jasper's vision have to do with the others?" Emmett asked. No one could answer.

We discussed her sleep talking and comments to Dream Edward all night. To our frustration, the only thing we knew is that something would happen soon and red-eyed people haunted her dreams, and somehow Dream Edward kept her pursuers at bay. Not very helpful at all, thank you very much Mrs. O'Shea Swan. The only advantage I saw from the vision today was Jasper's newfound ferocious respect for my singer in regards to his emotional and physical health. He'd never touch her. His mind kept replaying the vision over and over again. He tried to stem the waves of guilt that ate at him. No one complained. It distracted me from mine, and I owed him an odd debt for it. Having my human nearby for such an extended time had spoiled me. Despite the fact that she slept in my bed, I disliked having her from my sight. I stayed away to show my family and me that I had control. Besides, sleep deprivation could harm her ability to produce her scent.

We let her sleep late the next morning. As her pulse quickened Mary Alice and I hurried to her. She appeared restless and, with alarm, I noticed she seemed to be having another nightmare as her feet twitched as if she ran.

Mary Alice said at vampire pitch, "Jasper says she's terrified." My brother remained a healthy two flights below. Fearing the hellfire of her Grandmother, I sat on the edge of the bed and reached with trepidation and jostled her shoulder. Jerking awake in fright, she wore a terrified expression and launched herself into my arms.

"You are safe," I caught her as she gasped for air, stroking her back.

Acting like I did when she was delirious, I lifted her in my arms and moved onto the bed while slipping off my shoes. With my back against the headboard, I sat her across my lap. She leaned on my chest, as I cautiously stroked her hair. Gradually, she calmed as Mary Alice distracted us both with amiable chatter. She carefully handed her medication and a glass of water.

"How is your breathing?" I already knew the answer. She muttered, "Fine." Not that she lied well in the first place, but the accompanying rattling cough did not assist her duplicity.

"You prevaricate terribly. What frightened you?"

"I have bad dreams like everyone else about people chasing me. I'm sorry for disturbing you." She seemed embarrassed and would not meet my gaze. From her expression, I realized that would be all she elected to reveal.

Using my most persuasive voice I breathed on her twice and soothed, "I hate bad dreams. And you can disturb me all you like, you know." Cold comfort, but it was the only words I could offer. I hoped her Grandmother would assist me in my endeavor to protect her. I did have the moral high ground, after all, I sniffed.

"Bella, you've had an awful week," Mary Alice perched on her other side on the bed patting her arm, "It's only natural that you would have a bad dream."

She nodded. I did not want to let her go enjoying, of course, my exclusive access to her scent, but her breathing worsened and she required my medical assistance. With regret, I reached for her nebulizer and medication and shifted her from my lap to Mary Alice's side. I began to set the machine in place. My sister hugged her, teasing, "Bella, you've given us such a fright this past week a nightmare is actually refreshing." My singer returned a watery smile.

"Let's see if you feel better after a breathing treatment, shall we?"

My singer seemed to be feeling anger now, not it seems directed at us, but at herself according to Jasper. Odd. Trying not to fume, she put the mask of the nebulizer over her face, wincing at the taste of the mist as she inhaled the drug into her lungs.

"Keep that fierce expression and practice it in front of a mirror. It will assist you in our next chess game. I'm trembling already, my Queen."

She laughed through the mask, eyes dancing and mouthed, "You wish."

Five hours after taking her shower and dressing for brunch, I soundly beat her in a game much to her irritation, although her lungs sounded better. We sat on my bed opposite one another with Alice at the foot, a delighted spectator. A victory on my part only seemed fair considering my singer had routed me in the other two. Alice had beat her in two games and lost the other. Rosalie had joined in on the fun and had lost with surprising grace to my human in one wickedly plotted game before being called away by her husband. Jasper hid in his library, the coward, but commented on the moves as Mary Alice offered a play by play at vampire pitch. Emmett knocked on the door as we finished a game. I gritted my teeth as my stomach protested this morning's omelet I had consumed along her side. Alice had vomited hers two hours ago.

"Ah, hey Bella."

"Hi." She blushed, picking nervously at the quilt.

"Can you two give me a minute? I promise not to bite her." The sad thing is that he meant every word. Mary Alice remained within sight, so my singer would not panic.

Glaring at him in warning, I left with the chess set and quietly expunged the eggs from my system downstairs. His mind said, "Lighten up HuffWard, I'm trying to make her feel better. Go get ready to chew some more human food." Emmett occasionally had the best ideas, I thought, as I left the bathroom. Placing the game on the kitchen table, I asked Mother to make servings for all my siblings save Rosalie, as I knew better. Rosalie's face took on an unusual cast as she aided Mother in preparing human food.

This was going to be so much fun. I loved faking out my human. It brought added side benefits, like weight gain and improved health. I heard Mary Alice mentally groan as she saw my plan. She laughed saying at vampire pitch, "Ok, fine. But I get more chess time, bucko. And you're right it really will be hilarious. And worth vomiting."

I could hear Emmett at vampire speech whine from my room, "No way! That's disgusting. Darn. Fine, be that way."

Emmett said, "Bella, I'm real sorry you had to find out about your head injury the way you did. That must have really hurt." An epic understatement. My eyes widened in alarm as I expected her to cry. Instead her features remained remote. Noting her composure, Emmett continued, "My Mom and Dad adopted me because I had a severe head injury and my birth family could not care for me." Well, that was exactly the truth. Caring for a newborn Emmett had been a chore. "I deal with my disability every day and have learned a few coping tricks. And I do physical therapy. If you like, you can talk to me anytime. I think I'm done embarrassing you now."

Emmett sat still in the silence before she finally spoke, "Thanks for talking."

Forty minutes later Esme, Rosalie and I happily carried loaded plates with reeking piles of steaming human food to the table. My Mother and Father escaped from eating by claiming that had already dined. Emmett and I sat across from one another. Feeling that he had to support his wife, Jasper escorted her to the table, and sat before a plate as well, eyeing it like the enemy, sitting as far away from my human as possible. Mary Alice started banter with everyone that kept the tone light, discussing our favorite music.

I consumed my meal with precise manners, but just enough gusto to offend Emmett, toy with Jasper, and entertain Mary Alice. Hearing her laughing at our antics from the kitchen chatting with Rosalie, I loudly complimented our Mother on her exceptional cooking. I left out the part calling it "sawdust tasting human nutrients" out of consideration for our guest. Mother had prepared prime cuts of steak, baked potatoes and broccoli along with apple pie. I had, of course, specifically requested that chocolate be left off the menu. Emmett had not partaken of human food in twenty years and stared at his plate. I knew I had to do something desperate to motivate him to eat. She might lose her appetite if he ignored his food. I would use his one weakness besides Rosalie. Betting.

"Hey Emmett," I whispered at vampire pitch, "I bet you a new jeep that I can hold this food down longer than you can."

"A new jeep? That's not going to even make a dent in your pocketbook PantyThiefWard. So what do you get if I lose, although I can't see that happening?" He chortled back at the same frequency. His favorite pastime, aside from spending time with his mate, entailed making ridiculous bets with Jasper. Esme usually served as judge.

"You have to eat human food at school with your wife for a month." Rosalie's mind in the kitchen shrieked her disgust. Now that I spoke more often, this whole torturing my siblings game was one I definitely planned to continue. Throwing Rosalie into the mix only added to my mirth.

"You are so on PukeWard." He challenged.

Carrying a plate, the picture of innocence, Rosalie entered the room and sat by her husband. We all tried not to stare at her and she shifted, self-conscious and prim. Mary Alice gawped as Rosalie precisely sliced the steak into bite-sized pieces and daintily ate without a wince. At vampire pitch she said to her husband, "I would eat human food to prove my love for you. Every day." Her glorious smile lit up her angelic features as she joined in the human conversation which had moved to sports.

"Aw Rosie, I'm the luckiest man on the earth," Emmett said softly at vampire pitch, winking at her. He then proceeded to demolish his tray eating rapidly, adopting a blissed out expression as he mentally squealed with each chew. We all had learned years ago how to pretend being human and this represented the one part we all hated the most. Because I had never offered or participated in our family's long standing practice of betting, this motivated Emmett. He was stunned at my daring and he chomped his way through the broccoli thinking it tasted like tree bark. Too bad it hurt so much going down his throat having the consistency of boulders with sharp edges. This almost made up for the last decade of teasing by him. Emmett finished the entire plate as if he hadn't a care in the world. It helped that Jasper felt he had to atone for the vision by keeping everyone calm as he too, finished his meal.

A nudge from Emmett brought me from my reverie. Mary Alice and Emmett had cleaned their plates and she dearly needed an excuse to leave. Emmett was determined to outlast me. My record was six hours and forty two minutes. He vowed to beat me by an entire moment mentally thinking he had never looked forward to vomiting this much in his entire undead existence. I smirked at him at vampire speed. At human pitch, I said, "Mary Alice and Jasper I think it's your turn to do the chores." A lame excuse at best but they dove for it and exited the room with a chirpy "See you in a few," at my human. Emmett and Rosalie leapt up and offered to help, fleeing the room.

At long last my singer and I were alone, and I couldn't think of a thing to say. Well, this was awkward. Since I had left the game on the kitchen table we didn't have chess - which had been my savior in creating conversation. Gulping, I heard all my siblings save Emmett vomiting in separate rooms. From his shouted thoughts Emmett's mouth watered with venom but he held his stomach. I heard my singer clear her throat nervously as she dragged me from monitoring my family.

Beatifically smiling, I'm sure I confused my human as I heard Emmett's defeat as he lost the bet cursing my name. It elated me to think of watching him eat human food for the next few weeks.

"You look like the cat that just ate the canary." She teased.

"Actually I'm not a bird man. I prefer larger prey," I said without thought. Panicking as the words left my mouth I made my eyes smolder and breathed on her a few times to compensate.

She took on a dazed expression, heartbeat accelerating and squeaked. "Good to know."

The second Emmett finished expelling his dinner, I excused myself. "We have some schoolwork to do; I'll fetch your books if you wait here." She nodded and I walked sedately until out of the room and sprinted at vampire speed for my bathroom. With satisfaction, I relieved myself of the revolting presence of steak and potatoes from my system. I'd never been so happy to brush my teeth, despite having to be careful about destroying the toothbrush and all. I couldn't go around my human smelling of vampire vomit.

She had a history paper due in a few days. I thought I'd help my human by encouraging her mental acuity as I returned to the dining room table with her bag and my laptop. "I'd like to help you with your paper, if I may?"

"No, thanks." She took her calculus book from the stack and opened it to a section and began reading. I gawped at her as I sat in the chair next to her.

"You've been ill, I'm worried the strain of research could give you a relapse," I was not used to being told 'no' by humans. I breathed on her several times just on principle. She maintained a stubborn set to her jaw. Could she be developing an immunity to my scent? The thought disturbed me. I'd actually have to use reason more often and even talk more. How was that fair?

"I appreciate the offer, but I've already written the paper. You can proofread it if you like." She handed me a green flash drive, "It's in the file marked "current work". She looked down at her fingers which were twisted together as if she hadn't noticed her nervous movements and flattened her palms against the table. I started my computer, and opened the file. She took out a notebook, opened it to an empty page and began scribbling notes.

For a female, she picked the most fascinating subjects. "You are interested in battles?" I asked with a raised brow. She never ceased to amaze me.

"Mmmm yes. My Grandfather Swan used to read books to me about famous ones. He and my Great Uncle Liam were nuts about history. I took to it." She continued to work on her math without meeting my gaze.

"Why study humanity at its worst?"

"Because you learn what people choose to do even though they are afraid," she fiddled with a pencil sounding like she gave a speech to herself. I turned to the screen to read.

This treatise examined the battle tactics of Hannibal the famous Carthaginian general. I read through her ten page paper pretending to use a human rate and admired her use of argumentation and evidence. Her paper, while excellent, contained one glaring error. Of course, her suffering would be my suffering, so I gently pointed out the inconsistency to her.

"That's not an inconsistency," she glanced at me with a tranquil expression.

"He did not ever have a battle in which he lobbed serpents at other ships using clay pots."

"I'm sorry, but you're wrong. His army was outnumbered, and he needed to kill King Eusemens. They used the snakes to panic the enemy's ships."

I had a MA in Roman history, although I had studied a different period. I was not wrong. I wanted to explain the error of her ways to my singer.

"Click on the file marked 'evidence' that is right above, please?" Her tone mild, I quickly obeyed.

Drat. Foiled again by my human. Who knew she could also know more than me in history? Of course, I complimented her and admitted my wrong. It wouldn't do to be pig-headed about it. She scribbled her calculus equations in ten minutes completing her homework for the week.

"We have all your assignments from your teachers around here somewhere. We can get you caught up in no time."

"No thanks." I did a double take. Not this again.

"I'm already caught up." She seemed fascinated with her notebook, as she worked on equations.

"Bella, you've missed a week of school how could you be caught up?"

"All my AP classes in Phoenix required more effort. I'm ahead in all my classes because I asked for extra work. I'm probably still a week ahead of them." She said that with such quiet grace. Emmett and Jasper both snickered from the other side of the house. Rosalie sang, "Oh Edward, I neglected to mention she's way smarter than you think." She had known all along about my singer her thoughts revealed. Well, at least her gloating indicated she wasn't possessed by aliens as the old Rosalie roared back to life.

I had just made a phenomenal discovery with my research. She smelled heavenly, rarely complained, possessed a frighteningly bright intellect, played a divine game of chess, and rarely spoke. When her voice did sound, she was right. My singer, I realized, was the perfect woman. I couldn't waste her pristine talents on the mortal world. I was definitely going to have to marry her. After I figured out how to ask her out on a romantic - I mean "scent"-antic excursion. It wouldn't do to rush things. Mary Alice said so.

"Your work ethic is impressive. Absolutely astounding," I meant every word, as I smiled. For some reason, she seemed relieved at my compliment.

Grabbing the chess set, I led her back to my bedroom. She insisted on taking all three flights clutching the banister, my hand at her right elbow. Once she was comfortably settled in my bed sitting across the board, I spoke. I had to earn my pride back. "Jacob Black..." I began hesitatingly. How do you inform her that her Quileute sulker plots to wed her regardless of her wishes? Mentally shuddering at the memory of his rubbery lips on my hand, I did not want to terrify her needlessly, but she did need to exercise caution around him. And I did not know how to approach the 'girlfriend' issue.

"Is a creep but relatively harmless...."she didn't even need to finish that thought.

"He is rather determined to court you. I propose we keep him away by working together. I detest him pestering you. And our ploy at the hospital worked."

"He never calls me. He's never visited the house...." Guarded, her voice sounded as if she attempted to comfort me as to her safety. She wasn't cooperating, I thought in frustration. I would have to offer her sufficient motivation, and take the gloves off.

"I beg to differ. He called 37 times while you slept earlier, and eventually arrived at your home and attempted to order me and my Mother to leave. He claimed he was your future husband, and he acted on orders from the tribe." Using my most persuasive voice I looked her straight in her widening eyes. There. She now should be suitably inspired.

"What?" She wore an expression half irate-half frightened. Her ramrod posture reminded me for a brief moment of her Grandmother.

"Indeed. He asked me to leave for a year and give him a chance to pursue you and, if at the end of a year you were not his, he would give up his attempts to win your hand. I found his request to be positively repugnant."

Her eyes were wide. "He what?" her voice cracked and she started coughing violently. I sped to her side and assisted her by patting her on the back, careful not to break her ribs, while I offered her tissues. Once she ceased hacking up her lung, we resumed the topic at hand.

"Oh the nerve....What did you do?" she did not look so much concerned for Jacob as morbidly fascinated.

"We engaged in a felicitous conversation. I encouraged him to utilize gentlemanly behavior," she daintily snorted at the phrase, "towards you at all times while strolling in the forest enjoying the wildlife and trees. I have the distinct impression that due to his stupidity he will require further, and perhaps repeated, instruction." That sounded innocent enough. And it was the truth. Sort of.

"You're not telling me something. Did you two fight?" Perceptive little thing she was.

"I outweigh him by at least 50 pounds. That hardly seems fair." Why bother when verbally abusing him proved so much more entertaining?

"Where did this come from? He's never said anything like that although he stares all the time. I don't even think he likes me...Orders from the tribe? What hogwash." She stared out the window.

"He's been raised by his father to believe that you will somehow without any effort on his part fall in love with him and marry him by the time you are 18. Jacob seems to believe that soon he will have complete access to you with your father's blessing." Playing the angry-at-her-parent card was perhaps underhanded, but it was for the betterment of our relationship, I reminded myself. The silence stretched on as she stared at the wall in contemplation. Jacob's lies inspired me to act. I would boondoggle Forks with my "scent-ance" with my singer.

"You are quiet."

"I am appalled. And Billy's involvement. Ew." She scrunched in features into a mask of distaste.

"So you do not intend to accept his suit?"

Her voice rose, "Has hell frozen over?" she blazed, seething in fury. My singer was awfully cute when irate. I should make her angry more often.

"Will your father defend you from him?" Again that was mean, but I needed to make sure she understood her peril.

"No. Jacob's like a son to him. He probably loves him more than me since he's spent more time with him." Her face took on a sad expression.

"You've only recently moved in with your father. Perhaps he needs time to adjust as well. And surely he'll help you with Jacob." Somehow, my attempts to comfort her ended up twisting the knife in her more, as she flinched. I realized she needed to be sufficiently frightened, but hated having to be the one to do it.

"He's had 17 years, Edward. I don't resent him for the way he feels. It's not his fault life turned out this way. He's always wanted a son." She shrugged.

"Well then we will have to address the matter ourselves. Until we are sure that Jacob's been sufficiently handled, you have just acquired yourself a very eager Fake Boyfriend. I can promise you eternal vigilance, continued security, witty repartee, and endless bouts of afternoon chess." I brazened it out looking at her trying to banish the pleading from my eyes. She blushed to the roots of her hair, and looked sad for an agonizing moment. I feared she planned on rejecting me, as she maintained an interminable quiescence. Somehow my family had disappeared from the house.

"I accept your kind offer Fake Boyfriend," she cautiously extended her hand to seal the bargain with queenly grace.

"I am delighted to return your affections Fake Girlfriend," I happily took the aforementioned limb and shook it with care as it disappeared in my clasped hands.

"Does this mean we're going to be playing fake chess?" she appeared horrified, holding her free hand to her chest.

"Alas, no because I refuse to fake my victory over you." I smirked, taking and kissing her hand with closed lips, despite Jugurtha the Predator's grousing.

To my astonishment, she decisively beat me in all three games. I was pathetic. She distracted me with the glimmer in her whiskey eyes and the longing for her smile.

Emmett warned me of his approach and entered the room carrying a box labeled with her name. "Hey Bella, this came for you by delivery earlier. There were three boxes, and this is the first. What would you like me to do with it?" He remembered to smile at her without showing too much of his teeth.

"Could you please open it?"

"Do you know the contents?" I wondered who would send her such large boxes. Her bank account didn't show any recent activity so she could not have made a purchase.

"It's only books and some heavy things from old my room that I packed and asked my mom to ship. She kept forgetting, so I asked my step-dad to handle it." Emmett and I tried not to stare at her as we both thought what idiots her parents were.

I sincerely hoped warm clothing lurked in one. Using a pocket knife, Emmett handily opened this box. "Ah, do you want anything in here. It says box number two on the side?" He wanted to respect her privacy.

"There should be a picture album in there. Could you bring it here, please?"

Moving the paper aside, he found the item. Of course, the box contained books. From Emmett's mind, I could see that all were hardcover and her taste fortunately had improved. Not a single dreary English romance inhabited the box, although it had other more interesting volumes. My singer appeared to have a collection on famous battles. How she enchanted me so.

Emmett handed her the album. She said, "Thanks so much." Clearing his throat at my raised brow, my brother found a quick reason to depart inventing an errand from Rosalie.

"I've never made an album. What kinds of things did you choose to save?" Her mind constantly surprised me.

"This has every summer I spent in Forks." She hesitated, "Would you like to see?"

"Most assuredly, I would." The thought of her captured in film....I could remember the images forever. Of course I wanted to see. Perhaps this was how humans became close by sharing memories? My heart lightened as she had seemed so comfortable in my arms earlier. I hoped my campaign was working.

She turned to a random page. "Do you know the Clearwaters?"

"Only socially." That much was true. I kept my tone light.

"I spent almost all of my summers with them. Seth and Leah are like siblings to me." She displayed a picture, "This is from my fake birthday."

"I'm sorry?"

"My parents aren't good with remembering dates. Six years ago Seth decided that he and I should share a birthday since his is in July, and we've done it ever since. We call it his real birthday and my fake birthday. I've made the cake for the past four years." She pointed to a picture of an elaborate confection. More interesting than the cake, however were the people. Sixty-one year old Harry Clearwater was significantly older than his wife Sue, whose grinning face shone from the picture as she embraced three people. My singer stood on the left wearing shorts, a loose cotton white shirt, and a silver bracelet around her right wrist. Leah, a tall girl with short hair that reached her chin, stood next to her. On the far right of the picture, the spitting image of Ephraim Black stared back at me - with two noticeable differences. This is what Ephraim must have resembled as a teenager. Second, Ephraim's face wore my singer's distinctive brown eyes. Seth Clearwater had an interesting lineage. I wondered what a Black by birth was doing standing in the middle of the Clearwaters wearing their name. Thinking over our investigation and calculating his age by appearance, I put the puzzle together. At vampire pitch, I whispered to the family that I had just discovered the identity of Paula Black's child: Seth Clearwater. Jaws agape, a collection of "oh my's" sounded around the house. My singer's voice tore me from my thoughts.

Acting my most charming self, I asked her detailed questions about each picture. She appeared to truly love the Clearwaters, most likely more than her own parents. Historic enemies aside, I felt thankful for the presence of the Clearwaters in her life. And from my memory of reading Chief Swan's mind, knew him to be completely ignorant of his son. How could one overlook one's own offspring: both the known and the unknown? Seth took after his mother's side in appearance but his eyes -clearly matched my singer's.

We played another game of chess, and she trounced me handily. Although her lids drooped, she seemed to fight the need for respite, shaking herself awake as we discussed her victory and pored over pictures. I moved the set to the side jostling the pieces, tipping a few. At the sound of a pawn falling she started eyes wide in fright.

"Hey there," I moved to sit at her side with my back against the headboard gathering her in my arms, "Fake Girlfriend, you need your real sleep."

"Sorry." Her lids began to fall again, and she surrendered to the lure of Morpheus. I thought over the events of the day, while she drooled on my shirt again, as she snuggled against me, a positively endearing gesture I cherished. The drool, that is, the snuggling certainly pleased me as well. Her saliva I could treasure, a souvenir of her affection. At the rate I retired my shirts; my Mother would need to purchase more clothing for me. Once a shirt contained her sensational saliva, I sealed it in plastic to preserve it; the equivalent, I suppose, of vampire stamp collecting. I might never wear this shirt again, but I would definitely smell it every chance I obtained. Mary Alice rousted me from my singer's side, telling me I had to go hunt before I turned my Fake Girlfriend into a real vampire chew toy. Grumbling I left as my sister called out to me, "The Fake Girlfriend is brilliant," as I exited the house running into the night for alternative prey.

Pretend me delighted in waiting on my Fake Girlfriend and seized every opportunity I could to touch her to see if I could get a vision. Selfish me celebrated that she appeared to grow used to my touch, and hesitatingly made a few overtures of her own. Late Saturday night in her sleep she turned to me and said, "Dream Edward?"

"Yes?" I put down my copy of the Iliad.

"Don't leave," she sounded so forlorn.

"My heart is yours. You simply don't know it yet." I vowed.

"Good. Dream Edward?" she sounded worried.

"Yes, dearest," Carlisle and Esme came into the doorway with Jasper trailing behind.

"Grandmother has a message."

"I await it, my sweet." Esme adored how I crooned to her, as I brushed a lock of hair from her temple, entwining my hand in her own. We were now joined by Mary Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie.

"Jasper needed to remember and you needed to see. She feels bad for hurting everyone." That had my family's undivided attention. Her tone of voiced sounded both guilty and sad.

Using my warmest voice, I grazed my fingers across her cheek, "Jasper will be fine. Please thank your Grandmother Genevieve for her kind thoughts. We would be delighted if we could converse with her in a more direct fashion."

My singer said nothing to my frustration. Apparently making my life challenging with indirect conversations entertained her harridan of a Grandmother far too much to abandon.

"Is there anything else she wanted you to tell me? You're doing a wonderful job conveying her words." I remembered what happened the last time I had acted confused, and did not want to cause her to weep.

"Not harridan. Fake is good. Stay. Safe. Card. Apple. Soon." She cuddled against my side with a sigh, as we all wondered what that message could possibly mean. The first two words certainly gave me pause.

Clearly, tormenting me was a family trait. I anticipated paying it back; in chess, of course.

"Edward, your girlfriend needs to have her own warning label." Emmett insisted looking at her in awe.

"It's not her fault that visions come from her. She means no harm." I tried to keep from sounding offended, as I lay her down on the bed, and covered her with the comforter.

"If that last vision is what Mrs. O'Shea Swan does to get our attention, I don't even want to think about what she would do if she was angry."

I winced at remembering thinking of her as a harridan; and wondered at her next form of vengeance. Emmett pointed his index finger at me, "You're never breaking up. Her Grandmother would kill us all."

My family broke out in various stages of hilarity. I couldn't quibble with Emmett. Genevieve O'Shea Swan definitely represented a force of her own. Besides, why would I break up with my singer? That would be idiotic. And I was not, despite Hezekiah's insistence, an idiot. Given the success of my master plan to fake loving my human, my intelligence had clearly been illustrated. I sat on the edge of the bed, and stroked my singer's hair reveling in how I had her scent on my hands.

With great reluctance, I needed to leave her side to see to her safety, thinking of Hezekiah's words. I asked Jasper and Emmett if they would mind accompanying me. Intrigued, they both agreed. As we shut the car doors and drove away, Jasper initiated a conversation with, "Thank you for asking us to join you Edward. Why don't you tell me what I can do to help you?" His voice was kind. Emmett nodded in agreement from the back seat.

"We have to go see an old family friend. I need him to be calm and could use your expertise in questioning him." When I reached our destination and told my astonished brothers of my intentions, their eyes lit in anticipation, as they offered excellent suggestions. It took us seconds to collect our ninety-one year old friend and escort him undetected into the car. I smirked at a recently dressed Gregory Clearwater quivering by Jasper in the back seat and said, "It's delightful as usual to see you."

"Demons!" he hissed.

"I'd like to introduce you to my brother Jasper. He's the reason why you're so calm at present."

Taking out my cell phone, I called Harry Clearwater, and asked him to meet me at a set of coordinates in an hour with all the elders on urgent tribal business. Hearing his father bellowing in the background might possibly have contributed to his eagerness to comply. I parked the car five miles from our destination on a gravel road. Emmett carried Gregory as we sprinted through the trees to a higher elevation. We wrapped a fuming Gregory in a down filled sleeping bag, and set him out of the wind as we waited for the others to arrive. Henry Clearwater, surrounded by six men, stood on neutral land.

"What is the meaning of this?" he shouted.

"We're about ready to uncover some tribal dirty laundry that you all should hear." I replied. I walked to a rock wall covered with boulders. Purple piper's bellflowers sprouted from the cracks around the rocks, "Emmett, a hand please?" My brother placed Gregory with care on the ground in the arms of his son. We quickly moved the stone to reveal a cave. Panicked thoughts raced through Gregory's mind as he imagined spirits fleeing into the night. The elders were astonished at how easily we moved the massive boulders.

"That cave has been blocked for years. What is so important you had to drag my 91-year-old father from his bed in the middle of the night?"

"A man should stand by his deeds shouldn't he Gregory?" I scolded him. Carefully we led him into the cave as he grumbled. The flashlights that we had taken from the car lit the cave. We only had to walk in five feet to find the corpse.

"What in the living daylights is that?" John Quill sounded sincerely terrified, a inconstant state with him, I thought. He had been so brave when attacked by his brother, Lee, all those years ago.

"Hezekiah Stone. Gregory knows what happened to him. And Ephraim as well as Larry and your brother Lee. Isn't that right Gregory?" I said as I reached for Hezekiah's walking stick that emanated light in my hands, changing my eyes. My audience gaped seeing me turn the green their stories described. I thought the glowing eyes were a dramatic touch.

Jasper offered a charming smile that displayed his teeth quite nicely while keeping the elders calm, "What happened to Ephraim?" my brother inquired politely using a mild voice.

"I'll tell you nothing. I'm old you can't frighten me." I saw in Clearwater's mind as he shot Ephraim in the back in the pitch dark of the forest. While writhing and starting to regenerate, Gregory had decapitated Ephraim.

"I see. Well then how about telling us what you did to Larry, Lee, and Hezekiah?" Jasper prodded.

In Gregory's mind, Larry Uley met the same fate. His dismemberment was blamed on sharks. Because the wolves were so young, they had been easy for him to kill. Larry and Ephraim, at least hadn't expected murder at his hands. Lee had been pathetically easy to dispatch since he had been drugged, thanks to the leeches. The shaman Hezekiah expired of heart failure at Clearwater's hands after refusing to answer his questions. In this dark cavern with a low roof, Gregory Clearwater had literally tormented the man to death trying to access the tribe's secrets to regain the leadership. Unable to phase, Hezekiah had refused to utter a word, and had put himself into a trance. Screaming in rage, a crouching Clearwater had repeatedly kicked the shaman's frail body with his boot. After using it to break Hezekiah's legs, he had tossed aside his walking stick. The clatter of its impact with the cave wall echoed. Using the same stick, I sent the thoughts from Gregory's brain to the minds of the tribal members in the cave. Gregory mentally crowed that we'd never get him to confess; a thought they all heard. That leech with the glowing stick couldn't do a thing to him.

"Ah, but that's where you're wrong," I grinned and leaned forward. "I sent the thoughts from your mind to these fine gentlemen here. They now know everything you did." He swung around and saw the horrified looks of revulsion on their faces.

"I did it to protect the tribe. All the wolves were seduced by the leeches."

"Me and mine left the area to protect them. You murdered for power. And you drove Ephraim and Larry's family into poverty. We bought them houses and set up trust funds for their children because you butchered your own kind." Emmett said.

Cheerfully I added, "Hezekiah appeared to me today and suggested we chat. Since I liked him, I could hardly refuse. He also eagerly shared with me tribal knowledge that, I suspect, you may find useful." I turned to the elders.

"Is this some kind of joke?" Harry Clearwater gawped.

"No. I sincerely wish it were. He did not trust your father, correctly it seems, so gave me the memories of all your ancestors in 1940 without my knowledge. He unlocked them yesterday. Considering all the lies your father has spread over the years, don't you find it interesting that your own shaman trusted a vampire over a member of the tribe with the lore of your traditions?"

Harry and the elders spluttered. Gregory looked like he wanted to explode, seething in fury as he glared at Hezekiah's grinning corpse.

"What do you get out of this?" John Quill asked.

"Nothing. Would you like to have over a century's worth of my family's memories lurking in your mind like an unwanted dinner guest? Even Gregory Clearwater would agree that I should not know the things that I do," I said in their language. That seemed to help prompt their credulity. And Gregory Clearwater, by his expression, wholeheartedly agreed with my sentiment.

"He spluttered aghast, "What do you want?" The elder Clearwater pleaded.

"Why are the Blacks after the Swan family?" Jasper barked

"Pshaw, that nonsense? It's just tomfoolery." He waved a trembling liver-spotted hand.

"Then you should have no fear revealing it to us. We would prefer the Blacks not take leadership of the tribe." Since Clearwater loathed the Blacks he had no problem sharing. He hoped it would distract from that pesky quadruple murder confession. The elders were too stunned gawping to silence him.

"It's all about the land the Swans own that adjoins the reservation. There is a Quileute story that claims the owners of that land hold a priceless power." Gregory snorted, "It's hogwash. Charles Swan refuses to sell it claiming it's his daughter's inheritance. Those fools want to marry her to get it." Neither Jasper nor I detected any deception. His thoughts indicated he knew no more of use.

"Chief Clearwater, do you have any questions for your father?" I addressed Harry.

"He's not my father," Harry responded disowning Gregory in a single line.

I uttered the words I had pulled from my Quileute treasure trove of memories that seemed most appropriate; pointing the stick at him as green fire surrounded us both. I'd like to think my friend the shaman would be pleased, as the color leached from Gregory Clearwater's face. Using their ceremonial language, I cursed Gregory Clearwater to roam the earth away from his loved ones after his death. It was the most powerful punishment the shaman had and only whispered about between generations, feared, never before used. Jasper kept the other men calm. The circle of elders watched in silence. None disputed the punishment.

The elderly Clearwater stammered, "You don't have the right."

Scoffing I said, "Actually, I do, as it was given to me by Hezekiah." Gregory Clearwater's eyes widened in fear. "Now that I've uttered those words, Hezekiah's spirit can visit you at will and explain things to you. Ephraim and Larry as well are so very eager to catch up on old times. Goodness, Lee is just foaming at the mouth for his chance at you." Gregory whimpered. John touched his stomach in memory at the sound of his brother's name.

Harry Clearwater's weary expression settled upon his terrified father and hardened.

"I would appreciate it if you and your family visited Bella, or at the very least, called in the next few days. She misses you, and needs you all." I handed him a card with my cell phone number and address on it.

Harry Clearwater stiffly said, "You'd let us?"

I adopted a stunned expression, "Of course. You're her family. I would never dream of keeping her from you." I was a vampire prince above immortals, I thought.

Gruffly, he answered, "Thank you. I'll take Gregory from here." As I had the moral high ground, there really was nothing more he could have said, I inwardly gloated.

I temporarily re-sealed the cave to ensure Hezekiah's remains stayed where they were, carrying his walking stick. According to Jasper that whole quadruple-murder of fellow tribe members issue meant the elders would not start a war with us, not that they could, I mentally chortled. What would they do, throw wooden stakes at us? We ran to the car through the firs and hemlocks. Emmett drove to the house in silence. I tried to banish the images of the men's murders from my mind. As we pulled into the driveway, Mary Alice met her husband, took his hand and raced away into the woods to hunt deer and comfort one another. The vision's effects still tore at us all.

Trying to shake off the horrid memories, I remembered my vision of my human Father and Carlisle's comments about my things that had occurred on the first day she was hospitalized with pneumonia. Entering the house, I climbed the stairs to the attic. Absorbing the silence of things long forgotten, I found a wooden trunk bearing my name in a corner. I shook as I remembered the agony I had felt all those years ago when staring at my possessions. I had literally forgotten their significance, and in my grief had wanted to destroy them. Struggling with me, Carlisle had reasoned that perhaps one day I would recover my memories. He cautioned if I acted recklessly, I would always regret losing the vestiges of my human life. I had left the cabin to run and weep in private. While I had been gone, he had packed everything I had intended on crushing, and had stored it for me.

When the vision of my human Father giving me the pocket watch had occurred, my singer had been ill, and I never even considered leaving her side for such a self-absorbed reason. It felt wrong in my mind: both leaving and looking.

I heard Esme moving behind me, "I still have his things."

"Pardon me?"

"Your brother David's clothes and a toy I had made for him. They are preserved so they don't fall apart. And I take them out from time to time and think about my little boy."

"I cannot imagine what it feels like to lose a child, Mother."

"I would not wish that on anyone, Edward. The pain never diminishes, but you learn to live with it. I know it pains you that you have forgotten parts of your human life. I feel the same way about my own. Sometimes I think I've tried so hard to be a good Mother to you all because I can't remember everything I should about David." Her eyes were so understanding and full of love. I stared at her speechless.

"You're a wonderful Mother, you know, far better than I deserve."

"Thank you, dear. And I treasure you as my son." She touched my face with her hand and pointed to a picture of my human family, "You are not betraying me and Carlisle by thinking of them, or wanting to recover your memories. They were your parents, and they loved you very much, as we love you." I could not look her in the eye as I gazed at the trunk. "I can't even begin to tell you how it felt to recover my first sight of Carlisle from that vision Bella gave me. I now realize that I loved him fully from the first glance; and that's a gift I can never repay, a memory that will forever bring me joy. It's ok to want to feel that way about your human past, Edward."

With trepidation, I slowly lifted the lid. She put her hand on my shoulder, "Edward, in the end they are simply objects that cannot hurt you. Open your eyes sweetheart. You are not doing anything wrong."

With a sigh, I gazed down at the contents, schooling my features into a bland shape. Only one thing looked familiar. It was my human Father's watch. I took it and examined it in the light from the window. I opened its face to find an inscription, "To my son". I felt like my human Father stood in the room, telling me to remember what it meant to be a Masen. For once, I thought it a good thing he had long ago passed to his eternal reward. The man I remembered in that vision would have cried if he could see what I had done with the Masen honor. I hoped that with my 75 years of penance, that I had somehow made it up to him my sullying of the family name.

Ironically, my eyes fell upon a black jet rosary and a medallion of Saint Augustine. And now for some odd quirk of fate, a tiny human with a simple touch had the ability to remind me of the humanity I had long ago ceased to remember. Pocketing the watch, leaving the medallion and rosary, I closed the trunk. Kissing Esme on the cheek, I thanked her for understanding. She realized I needed to be alone, and nodded as I walked out of the attic and down the staircase. I felt the watch in my pocket, burning with a memory like a fire against my conscience. It truly represented a miracle that it even existed.

Memories long repressed surged back at me. I recalled crying as I had held the watch on that day decades ago in my palm, rocking back and forth on the ground and screaming in rage. Opening it, and reading the inscription on the watch had triggered my rage. When I had read the words, "To my son," I had not been able to call up the image of my own human Father in my mind. To the best of my recollection, I had almost shattered the watch then and there. I felt so grateful to Carlisle that he had prevented me from doing so, by wrestling it out of my hand and doing his best to calm me. He had described my human Father to the best of his ability for me, and he had saved my possessions. Staring at the watch, I realized unwittingly my singer and Carlisle both had given my human Father back to me. Confident that she slept soundly, I crept into my dark room.

I almost felt like my bedroom belonged to a stranger, as I scrutinized my possessions, grabbing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and a long sleeved cotton shirt from my chest of drawers to change in the bathroom. Now that we cared for my human, we had to make the effort to appear as such. Seeing my once bare bathroom counter with something so mundane as her hairbrush and toothpaste lying on it felt surreal. Whereas once I had rarely been inside these walls, lately, my human's presence kept me there. Walking back into my room, I glanced at the small wooden box that contained my most valued possessions: Sister's Claire's strange knife, my Mother's ring, and the bottle cap. Seeing the things I treasured reminded me of how I had nearly lost my singer.

I could feel my composure crumple as the past days took its toll. The terror of trying to protect her from myself and my family during the vision, while feeling the agony of all those men had scourged me. That indescribably horrific event, compounded with the mirage of my humanity being restored, had required every scrap of acting ability and control I wielded not to collapse. Adding in the memories of my friends being murdered, and the thoughts about my human family, made me reach the depths of despair. I knew what would come, yet feared it still. At that precise moment, feeling like it had split in twain; my heart started to beat, a fact I and my family desperately struggled to ignore. Realizing all that I had become since my death, had recalled unfamiliar human feelings long buried. Knowing that soon my heart would stop again, I cringed at the wave of emotions I expected. I wondered how many more times I would have to endure this torment. In any other case, I would have fled to the park to suffer in private. She needed me, however, and I couldn't leave her, not after seeing the visions and knowing something would happen soon. Anchored to my singer, I stared out the window praying for solace. The intensity of her Grandmother's vision added to my anxiety - I feared I could not protect her and having almost lost her three times - my mind recoiled.

I sank to my knees on the thick carpet. With my back to her, clutching the watch to my chest, despair washed over me. For a few shameful moments, I wondered how I could please both Fathers and still be me; how I could continue persuade her to love me and not drive her from my side. I smelled my own human blood again, and once again the desolation hit me, as I prayed my heart would not stop. I felt buffeted about with these strange feelings that I think stemmed from my human life: hope, happiness, longing, and anguish. My ability to cope cracked, as I realized I was about to repeat that hideous experience of losing my half-humanity all over again. Indeed my undead existence had now taken on qualities that made Sisyphus appear to have received a fair punishment.

Mary Alice and Jasper hunted in the woods near where I preferred to think. My human needed me at her side to protect her. She was a deep sleeper, anyway. I would remain trying to master my emotions and regain my exceptional control. Squeezing my eyes shut, I rocked back and forth, sensing for a moment my human Mother's hand on my face from the vision. I wrapped my arms around me to remember her embrace. Feeling again like Tantalus, I tracked my cruel heartbeat longing for the humanity kept one step from my grasp. Shuddering, I silently fought the urge to weep. I felt the fire of the watch in my hand, loathing myself for not being stronger. Clearly God had not finished rewarding me for my sins as he meted out the most devastating punishment: hope.

A hand touched my shoulder, and to my utter shame, my completely awake Fake Girlfriend walked around to face me. She halted my rocking frame with her small hands on my upper arms. Tasting human tears on my face that were my own shattered what little composure I had left, as she quietly took me in her arms. Considering for over 80 years, I had longed for almost every moment to reattain my humanity - having it halfway granted and yanked away became a new form of torture that decimated me in twenty-four hours. Standing there barefoot in her nightgown with the baby roses, her hair cascading around her shoulders, she wordlessly held me against her chest. Her hands caressed my stiffened shoulders. For half a second I panicked, and contemplated fleeing the room. Somehow, she seemed to know, as stubbornly she held me tighter and whispered in a determined voice, "You're not leaving."

With a sigh, I surrendered. Falling from my nerveless fingers, the pocket watch landed on the carpet with a soft thud. I unclenched my fists and wrapped my arms around her hips like a drowning man clutching a lifeline, gasping. She rocked back and forth for a moment, as the force of my grasp hit her. Rather than trying to break away, she stroked my hair. Her gesture humbled me, as I shivered. Bereft of pride, I couldn't stop crying, feeling shamed and weak, although I made not a sound. She kept one hand running through my hair, the other stroking my back and shoulders. My tears soaked her nightgown, as I listened to her poor lungs wheeze to the tune of her beating heart. After fifteen minutes, I started to calm, most likely due to the combined luxury of being in her touch and scent. Shamefaced, I realized how much time had passed and felt guilty.

"I apologize," my voice cracked, as I reached down for the pocket watch, lifting it from the carpet. My right arm remained around her.

"You're always the one being strong for me. Now it's my turn." She caressed my cheek, took the watch from my hand, and placed it on my desk, "Edward, come to bed." She whispered.

"It's not...." her fingers touched my lips, silencing me. I froze at the contact, as her warm fingers slid to my jaw, blithely dancing away from sure death. She tipped my chin up, with her hand grazing my jaw with her fingertips.

"Is this the part where you worry about my virtue?" My human looked fierce in the moonlight as she vowed, "You will be a gentleman; I have faith in you even if you don't, Fake Boyfriend. You are exhausted. I get to win this match."

She tugged at my arms. I decided to let her have her way and rose to my feet. Gently, she nudged me towards the bed. As I slid beneath the covers, I knew there'd be hell to pay. Regardless; I couldn't summon the will to care, foul creature that I was. Selfishly, I needed her. She crawled in beside me, yanked the comforter over us, and tenderly pulled me towards her saying my name. Broken, I crept as she directed me, and allowed her to arrange me to her satisfaction against her. My head rested upon her chest, listening to the symphony of her heart. She stroked my hair, murmuring soothing words with one hand, and my back with the other. I now understood why she enjoyed my fingers on her hair. I could feel the heat of my body temperature rise towards normal with the pumping of my heart. The silence resounded in the house.

I heard Starched Shirt Edward, who wiped away tears of his own, lament, "I would prefer you be outside the covers; but if you behave like a gentleman, I will excuse this just once. We have had a torturous few days. And our dear little one is definitely our Queen." Jugurtha the Predator snuffled alone in his lair, "What he said," echoed from the depths.

Waves of exhaustion from using the power that evening washed over me, as she whispered of how brave and strong she believed me to be. Combined with the loneliness that nibbled at the tatters of my soul, desolation's tide washed away my hope for humanity restored. I might not be able to live as a human, but I could still remember the vestiges of being one, thanks to her. The second she touched me, I felt calmer, like I had arrived home after a long journey. I ignored my beating heart to concentrate on hers.

Alerted by Father, Mary Alice and her mate had returned to the house. My brother quietly asked if he could send calming waves to me. At vampire pitch I whispered, "Please." Then I blocked everyone's thoughts. Even Jasper's power couldn't banish my woe, although it ameliorated it a bit. For the first time in my undead life, I fell asleep being held by a woman, to the lullaby of her words. Of all my cherished possessions I only had five things that meant anything to me; and the most precious had a beating heart, her tiny arms wrapped around me, as we lay entwined in my bed. I realized, in that moment, that I would give anything to be able to feel this kind of peace every night. Jasper's power swept over us both again, and carried us away to dream.

I dreamt of sitting in my human parent's bedroom in Chicago, as Mother styled her hair, preparing for an evening out with Father. I had her hair color and cheekbones. She wore a lavender gown, diamonds at her neck.

"Edward, I saw your father gave you the pocket watch last night. I also have something to offer you. Now that you are a man, you are old enough to court a young lady. This was your Great-grandmother's," she handed me a silver locket. I opened it to read the tiny words, "To my heart's beloved," inscribed within.

"It's lovely Mother, thank you."

"In order to find a suitable bride, son, you have to converse. I am going to throw a series of teas so you can practice. I know you're shy. After a few months, we'll hold a dance, and invite your favorite young lady and your group of friends from school."

The dream ended as I saw my human Mother's smile. Tomorrow was the anniversary of our death.

Despite sleeping for hours, I awoke in the same position, cradled in my singer's arms, my head in the hollow of her shoulder early the next morning after sunrise. Because I had neglected to close the shutters the night before, soft light illuminated the room. She had awakened before me, and caressed my hair. The sensation indescribable, imbuing her scent calmed me; as her tiny hand stroked my head, the pleasure ironic given the pain that I anticipated as I heard the echo of my heartbeat. I had no idea what I would tell her, and at the moment didn't even care. My heart would soon cease beating, and I girded myself for the incipient misery. Carlisle told the family to please leave me in peace, as they all listened to my gradually slowing heart. Real human tears welled in my eyes, and fell on her gown, as Mary Alice, Esme, Jasper, Emmett and particularly Rosalie wept along with me in solidarity. I thought of the dream and my human Mother's face, recalling the locket packed in the trunk upstairs. My family and I listened, and my human held me in her arms, as my heart slowly stopped. With the last beat, I felt her lips on my forehead. Somehow peace eventually settled in my screaming mind. I had kept my eyes shut the entire time too, afraid to look at her. I could only take so much, and weeping in her arms.....I dreaded her reaction in the light of day.

In a welcome distraction she spoke, "Edward," she whispered, kissing the top of my head, "I think we should take a holiday - just the two of us." A jolt of power ripped through me, at the touch of her lips against my skin. I genuinely wondered what she considered a holiday to be as she stroked my back. Her voice sounded so loving. I decided to pretend as if I hadn't spent the night in her arms sobbing like a child. A man had to have his dignity. She elected to let me pretend, smart girl.

"Capital idea, my Queen." I answered, swallowing. Reaching for the nightstand across her, my long arm captured her medication and handed it to her along with a glass of water. She gulped the pills, and emptied the glass. Unable to meet her eyes, I helped her stand, and escorted her to the doorway of my bathroom. Her lungs sounded clearer, and she walked with more ease. Staring out the window, I listened to her movements as she relieved herself, washed her hands, and brushed her teeth and hair behind the closed door. Morosely, I wondered how long it would take for her to dismiss me from her sight. It was early, and she required more rest,I thought, as I used the shutters to darken the room. Girding myself for rejection, I tried not to start in surprise when she padded behind me and took my hand in hers. Rather than sneering, her face appeared tentative as she searched my features. With a shy smile, she turned to the bed and decisively pulled me away from the window. I liked my bossy silent human. Who was I to deny her when she pushed me towards the welcoming sheets? A true gentleman never refused a lady's nonverbal request. I did wonder what she had in mind, I confess, as she pulled the covers over us. So too, damn them, did my family, whose thoughts I studiously ignored.

Once we were under the covers, she scooted against me cuddling, "Tell me about the watch." Fortunately for me, I acted as a gentleman only when it suited me, as I pondered a whole host of lies, and settled for a severely edited version of the truth. The best deceptions, after all, contained an element of fact.

"It belonged to my late Father. I stumbled upon it yesterday...It was the anniversary of his death, today is the anniversary of my late Mother's," an epic understatement, if ever, but ironically the truth. I recalled the tumult of memories and long dead emotions. My expression in the dim light must have conveyed my distress.

"I'm so sorry, Edward." She didn't waste useless platitudes or pity on me. It amazed me that she respected my grief. I had no idea what I had done to merit such an angel. Since my devious mind couldn't think of anything else to say, I took the coward's route. I pretended to fall asleep as she lay stroking my hair, relaxing my body and slowing my breathing rate. Even Emmett refused to tease me as I anticipated. As he and Rosalie left for the day, he announced their intention on eating human food at a local eatery, even though it was the weekend. Mary Alice and Jasper remained in their room, my Parents in the library. My brother complimented me on my strategy in avoiding conversation. He sent what perhaps was the strongest wave of calm I've ever allowed wash over me, which had the effect of knocking my singer out like a pugilist's punch. I switched positions to cradle her. It was, after all, my turn, as I arranged the covers around us. Despite my cooling body temperature, her pendant seemed to protect her.

Over and over in my mind, I recalled the image of her holding me in her arms as I wept, of the sensation of falling asleep in her embrace. I realized something that day. My singer might be tiny, but she was deceptively strong. Even better, she seemed to accept my emotional weaknesses. That should serve her well. Being my Fake Girlfriend, perhaps my real fiancée, was definitely going to test her if I had my way. I imagined the glass shattering around us with a smile, ignoring the shrieking of Starched Shirt Edward as he pontificated about chastity, as I caressed her back hearing her sigh, "Edward." Take that Jacob Black, I smirked, as she kissed the fabric of my shirt in her sleep. Rubber-mouthed Rapscallion. Speaking of lips, I'd have to work on that whole kissing while conscious business; I decided. With a sigh, I ruminated over last night's blissful sensation of her lips on my brow, and the top of my head. I'd been too upset at the time to properly enjoy the feeling, a fact that I intended on remedying as my vampire mind replayed the image continuously. After all; Fake Girlfriends required real kisses, I thought in anticipation, as my fingers grazed from her neck to rest on her cheek. With a wicked smile as I gazed down upon her gorgeous face; I justified that it was, if I recalled correctly, my turn.

---

Author's Note: Edward wakes up to find he's in a vision with Hezekiah who is trying to help him understand his powers. When he returns back to real life, Edward thinks he's a human for a few blessed moments but he can't let everyone know how happy that makes him because he's never told anyone in his family how much he loathes being a vampire. (His newborn years sure he had lots of emotional outbursts in front of Carlisle but they were about the process of being a vampire - forgetting his memories, etc. and he didn't want to make Carlisle feel guilty.) So to have his heart start and stop twice in 24 hours broke him. Also he has all these raging emotions floating about that he can't identify that drain him physically and emotionally. Edward and his brothers kidnap Gregory Clearwater and take him to the cave where he murdered Hezekiah Stone all those years ago. Edward uses his powers to "show" to the Quileute elders all the murders that Gregory Clearwater did as they stand over the decomposed body of Hezekiah. Without blinking an eye, or an ounce of regret, quiet shy Edward stripped Gregory Clearwater of his ability to be in the afterlife with his family - in front of the stunned elders and his equally floored brothers. Also, he is finally getting a bit of time to think about the human memories that he's recovering through the visions that Genevieve sparks; and he's afraid that his family will be offended if he shows how happy that makes him. So the scene with Esme was written to show that he has two vampire parents who love him unconditionally and he doesn't understand that. And then there are those powers....

Edward has constructed this elaborate self-delusion as a response to trauma - the perfect vampire shy son who never offends anyone for fear of rejection. You are starting to see that start to shake and rattle as he picks fights with his siblings, breaks Mike's legs, threatens people at school, obsesses over Bella, Speaks at length for crying out loud which is agonizingly difficult for him (esp with Bella), and actually cries in front of her even after she finds him. In what perhaps is the lowest moment of his life so far he reaches out to her for comfort, and she's strong for him. And Edward can't believe it. He's never let himself be vulnerable like this with anyone much less a human. So in the last paragraphs you are starting to see him begin to change the way he thinks about her. Next up we'll see how he reacts to them. Thanks for reading. :) Books

Dream Edward is blinking around Jugurtha the Predator's shoulder begging for a review, blowing kisses at you. :)