"In penance for their uprising, each district shall offer up a male and female between the ages of 12 and 18 at a public "Reaping." These Tributes shall be delivered to the custody of the Capitol. And then transferred to a public arena where they will fight to the Death until a lone victor remains. Henceforth and forevermore this pageant shall be known as The Hunger Games."

XXX

"And so it was decreed, that each year the twelve districts of Panem shall offer up in tribute one young man and woman, between the ages of 12 and 18, to be trained in the art of survival, and to be prepared to fight to the death."

I stand in a group of sixteen year old girls looking up at the temporary stage where a woman in a pink wig and lime green suit, with two glass bowls full of slips on either side of her, stands in front of a microphone.

"I just love that!" Effie trinket exclaims, her pink wig shifting slightly off of her head. In Chicago, no one would be caught dead wearing anything like that. She looks oddly out of place. What, with her neon colors and everybody else in dull whites and grays. She's a rock in the middle of some pebbles.

Effie continues on about how being here is an "honor" and she lists the names of District twelve's past victors.

Through the crowd, I spot Tobias looking back at me. He put his index finger to his mouth and fake gags. I smile at him weakly.

Am I taking this too seriously? Maybe Gale was right. What are the odds? There are, God knows how many, names in that bowl. I only had to enter my name once and I made sure Prim did too.

But then there is Gale, and Peeta, and Tobias. What will happen to them? They entered their names a second time for tesserae, grain, and oil. That increases their chances of getting picked.

I guess that since there are a thousand more slips in that bowl, their chances aren't increased by that much.

So why am I so scared?

It's time for the drawing. "Ladies First!" Effie announces, her Capitol accent strong, and crosses to the bowl with the girl's names. She reaches in, digs her hand deep into the bowl, and pulls out a slip of paper.

I hold my breath as she walks back to the microphone, desperately hoping that it's not me. Effie unfolds the slip and reads into the microphone.

"Zinnia Dartmouth."

The group of girls beside me, split to let out a girl with long fiery orange-red hair and freckles. For a minute she just stands there, out in the open, gawking at the stage. She is very pretty with her full pink lips. Her pale complexion brings out her rotund hazel eyes.

"Come on, dear." Effie urges her.

When she finally walks up to the stage, Effie has her introduce herself and then she continues on to draw from the boy's bowl.

Effie walks over to the bowl and grabs another slip of paper. She walks back to the microphone and reads out the name in a clear voice.

And it's like it knocks the wind out of me. My heart stops and I'm unable to speak or breathe as I repeat the name again and again in my head, trying desperately to change it into someone else's. I see him standing in the crowd looking up at the stage, wide-eyed and stunned. That's what knocks me into reality.

Someone is gripping my arm, a boy, and I think maybe I started to fall and he caught me.

This can't be real.

Not him.

There must have been a mistake.

Not him.

XXX

6 days before

"So you're positive he's going to be okay, right?" I ask my mom, referring to the sleeping baker on the couch.

After Peeta had a spasm attack, Gale rushed him here to my mother so she could give him herbs to help with the poison. It turns out the berries he ate were a toned down version of Nightlock berries.

That was five days ago and Peeta is still recovering from it. I check on him every day and do things like give him his medicine or read to him. Whatever it takes to make him feel better.

"For the millionth time: Yes, Katniss. Peeta is fine. You're worrying too much. All he needed was a little nap."

I let out a sigh and sit down at the kitchen table, my head in my hands. My mother comes and sits in the chair next to me and rubs circles on my back. "It's okay Katniss. You know, maybe you need a nap too. You've been taking care of this boy day and night. I know you must be exhausted."

I fold my arms on the table and lay my head on top of them. "No," I say. "I just want him to get better, is all."

"He is getting better. You just need to calm down and not worry so much. You're living in a new place and I bet you haven't even explored it. You haven't met anyone new. You haven't made any friends."

"Mother, this is not my first day of school," I snap.

A hurt look appears on her face. I soften my tone.

"I'm in a strange place I don't know, the boy I…" I hesitate for a second. "… care about is not well and Gale is still acting strange. It's a lot to take in in a week."

"I know, Katniss. I know. And that's why I'm suggesting you go upstairs and sleep. Your body needs it. I should know; I'm the nurse here. It's getting late anyway."

Maybe my mother is right. I've barely gotten enough sleep these past few days. I've been too busy worrying about Peeta and everything else that's going on, I haven't had any time to just rest.

I stand up, scooting my chair back and walk towards the steps to my bedroom. Before I go I turn to my mom, with her graying pale blond hair and her few wrinkles but under that lies the beauty from her youth. "Thanks mom. I love you."

The memory of my mother and me on the couch crying together just four days ago flashes through my mind. It was me telling her how much I missed her, and not just for the amount of time I was in Dauntless. Five years. I've missed her since my father's death. For five years she was a different woman than the one who raised me. For five years I didn't even want to think of her as my mother. I've missed her. "I love you mom," I said.

And I really do.

XXX

5 days before

I wake up to a loud banging on my bedroom door.

"Katniss! Wake up!" Gale's voice is slightly muffled through the door.

The sun shines through my window into my eyes. How long have I been sleeping? My head is throbbing and have this foul taste in my mouth. I roll over and put my pillow over my head. "Go away!" I yell back.

"Come on, Katniss! I have someone I want you to meet!"

"I don't want to meet anybody!" I shout.

"Katniss, I can't hear you through your pillow and your door." He sighs. "Just be ready in twenty minutes or I'm coming in there." I hear his footsteps pad down the stairs.

Why is he being so social all of a sudden? He's barely said anything to me since we got here, and who could I possibly need to meet?

I roll out of bed and go into the bathroom to take a shower. After I braid my hair and brush my teeth, I slip on some boots and a jacket and head downstairs.

I'm met downstairs by the smell of freshly baked bread. In the kitchen, Peeta is bent over taking the loaves out of the oven, his blonde hair is still a tousled mess.

I sit down at the counter. "Good morning."

He sets the loaves of bread down in front of me. "Good morning, Katniss. I see Gale finally managed to drag you out of bed."

"Yeah," I say. "Do you happen to know what time it is?"

"About noon."

"I slept till noon?"

"Well, yeah. You needed it though. You must have been tired, taking care of me this whole week."

He looks so much better than he did five days ago. His skin is not that pale sickly green, but a baby pinkish color. His crystal blue eyes are no longer clouded and his charming personality is back. "It was worth it. I'm just glad you're better."

He looks up at me with a shy smile as he cuts the loaves in half.

Just then Gale barges through the front door and strides towards the steps. He does a double take when he sees me and smiles. "There you are. I was just about to go up there and kick down your door."

"I'm glad you didn't. You would have been thoroughly disappointed."

He laughs and looks at Peeta. "Hey Peeta, are there any strawberries in the fridge?"

"Uh, yeah. I think so."

"Great. Could you put them in a bag for me?"

"Okay."

"Thanks."

"Strawberries?" I ask. "You don't even eat strawberries. At least, that's what I remember."

"No, you're right." Gale says. "I don't eat strawberries."

"So why-"

"You'll see." Gale says.

XXX

District twelve is so much different than Chicago. There are way less people milling around and bumping into you. It's definitely smaller. It has a totally different ambiance. Here the people seem…sadder. As if some well known and well liked person has died. I wonder why that is…

Gale and I are walking towards the middle of town. Whenever I ask him who I'm going to meet, he just responds 'you'll see.'

Finally we stop at a fairly large white house with a blue door and blue shutters on the windows. It looks much better than most of the houses I've seen here in District twelve. Whoever lives here must be rich. "Who lives here?" I turn to Gale.

He starts walking up toward the front door. "The mayor." He says when we're on the porch. He rings the door bell and I hear it make that 8-note ring that you usually hear when ringing the doorbell of a big house. "You're taking me to meet the mayor?"

"No, not the mayor, his daughter."

Before I can respond, a girl with yellow-blonde curling locks and deep blue eyes in a baby pink sun dress opens the door. "Gale!" she exclaims. She wraps her arms around his neck, stands on her tiptoes, and kisses him straight on the lips.

I can't stop my mouth from dropping wide open. I can't be shocked though, right? I mean, I expected him to have a girlfriend. He's very attractive and he's had plenty of girlfriends before.

But he kissed me.

Granted, it was two years ago but still: he kissed me.

Did he forget about that? I did too, but the sight of him kissing someone else brings the memory back. A shudder runs through me.

The girl smiles up at him. When she turns towards me she jumps, as if she just realized I was standing there. "Oh hello," she says. "Gale, who is this?"

"Madge, this is my best friend Katniss. Katniss, this is my girlfriend, Madge." His arm is still wrapped around Madge's waist.

"I could have guessed," I say, scratching the back of my neck.

Madge laughs and you can see she has straight, perfectly white teeth. She extends her hand out. "Nice to meet you, Katniss. Would you like to come in? I'll make some cookies."

XXX

After sitting down talking to Madge, eating cookies and strawberries and laughing for two hours, the sun begins to set and Gale and I start walking home.

"Well?" he asks.

"Well what?"

"Did you like her?"

"She's…nice. A little too nice. She doesn't seem anything like you."

"Oh shut up." Gale laughs. "I really like her." I can tell by the look in his eyes that he really does. But I can't stop myself from asking.

"So what about what happened between us?"

Gale turns to me, confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Two years ago. Before the choosing ceremony."

His face contorts with a dawn of realization. "Oh, Katniss I'm sorry. I was sixteen and acting on feelings I thought I had when really all that it was was just that I cared for you a lot." He rambles. "If you expected anything I'm sorry-"

I laugh at that. "Gale, calm down. I wasn't expecting anything. I just wanted to know."

He exhales. "Well that's a relief. That would have been awkward."

As we get close to my house the door flies open and Prim comes bounding down the steps, her blond hair blowing behind her like a cape in the wind, into my arms. "Katniss!"

"What is it? What's wrong?" I look

"Nothing, Nothing. I was just waiting for you to get home."

"Why?"

"To ask you if you could take me to Tobias's house."

"Tobias' house? Why do you want to go there?"

"He said he was going to teach me to bake Dauntless cake."

"I have heard Dauntless cake is the best," Gale says.

I exhale a long breath, lifting a lock of hair out my eyes. "Fine, little duck. Let's go."

Prim jumps. "Yay! Thank you!" She grabs my hand and pulls me back towards the town.

XXX

I knock on the front door of Tobias's house. He lives on the other side of the town. In a house just big enough for two people.

The day after we arrived in District 12, Gale told us that the Mockingjay, the resistance group Gale joined, only got one house since Gale told them he only needed one. At the time, Gale hadn't known about Peeta, which is why Peeta has to live with me and my family since he didn't want to share a house with Tobias or live in the seam, where the poor people of District 12 reside.

Tobias opens the door wearing a white apron smudged with brown stains, chocolate I assume, and his brown hair sticking up all over his head as if he's raked his fingers through it multiple times.

Prim covers her mouth, giggling at his appearance and I say, "Well hello there, gorgeous."

Tobias sighs and walks away from the door, leaving it open so we can enter. We walk through the door, into the living room. Primrose goes into the kitchen with Tobias.

His house doesn't look any better than he does. There are newspapers and balled up pieces of paper strewn across the floor, the TV blasting, and a horrible burning smell drifts out from the kitchen.

I walk into the kitchen to find Tobias and Primrose with their elbows on the counter, leaning over a very black and very burned chocolate cake.

"What happened here?" I ask.

Tobias lets out another long exhale and says, "I wanted to bake two cakes, one I made myself and then one Primrose and I would have worked on, so I could give the second one to someone, but I left the one I made in the oven too long and now it's this big round block of charcoal."

I laugh at how childish he looks, all disheveled over a cake.

"It's not that bad," I joke. "Just scrape off the black parts."

Primrose laughs. "And then the whole cake would be gone."

This cracks a smile out of Tobias, but it's gone as soon as it appeared. He sighs for the third time. "Katniss, I need to talk to you." He nods his head toward the living room.

"Okay," I say.

"Be right back, kiddo," he pats Primrose on the top of her yellow head.

I follow Tobias into the living room and up the steps to his bedroom which looks like the only place in his house that hasn't been hit by a tornado. The walls are white and boring, as opposed to his apartment wall that had the words "Fear God alone" painted on it. The only thing that is the same is the smell, which can only be described as pure boy and detergent.

He closes the door behind us.

He walks over to his bed and sits on the edge of it, patting the spot next to him. I sit beside him.

He looks down at his hands for a while before saying anything. All the while I stare at him. There's something wrong with him, and it's not the cake. It's something deeper than that.

"It's Dauntless." He says abruptly. "It's been eating me alive."

His words catch me off guard and I gasp a little at his suddenness. "What about Dauntless?" I ask even though I know the answer because the same thing has been on my mind.

"How we just left them there to fend for themselves. We knew what was coming. We knew. And we didn't even have the decency to warn them." His voice cracks when he says 'warn them' and for a second I think he's crying but I look up at him and his face is hard.

"There was nothing we could do."

"There was something we could have done. We could have warned them. We could have taken them with us. We could have-"

"But Gale said-"

"Screw what Gale said! We could have done something." He stands up abruptly and walks over to the wall, laying his forehead on it. "I may not have agreed with some of the things Dauntless did but they don't deserve to die!"

"You don't know what's happening back in Chicago!" I snap. "For all you know, Dauntless may have been a part of what the Erudite was planning. You were the one who saw the plans! Why would Erudite send over war plans to the people they're fighting against? For all you know-"

He looks at me, then. "You're right, Katniss." His voice rises. "I don't know! But I do know that regardless if Dauntless is a part of it or not, the initiates, your friends, had absolutely nothing to do with it! And right now, I guarantee you, they're in the middle of a shoot out and it's all our fault because we didn't warn them!"

It's true. Everything he is saying is true and I know it. Yet, I can't bring myself to say it and I can't stop the tears in my eyes from spilling over.

"There was nothing we could do." I can't seem to get my voice above a whisper.

"There was something we could do, Katniss!" The force of his anger hits me like a wave. He walks over to me so we're inches apart, him towering over me. His blue eyes, usually thoughtful, are hard and critical, like they're peeling away every layer of me. "Why don't you understand that? People are dying right now. Because of us. Because of you and you say there was nothing we could do about it?" He lets out a breath, and says, his voice low and vicious, "Now I know why you didn't choose Abnegation. Because you're selfish."

I should feel angry and hurt because of the way he is talking to me. He has never spoken to me like this before, as if he hated me. But I feel nothing but emptiness as I slam his bedroom door shut behind me, run past Primrose sitting on the couch with a worried expression on her face, and out the door into the cool starry night.

XXX

4 days before

I sleep…

3 days before

I eat… I sleep...

2 days before

I'm awakened to a soft knocking on my door.

I slept all day yesterday. Maybe it was because all of the running around caught up to me and I finally collapsed of exhaustion or maybe it was just that I couldn't drag myself out of bed. I hear my door creak as its being opened.

"Katniss?" Primrose's child-like voice cuts through my thoughts. "Are you okay?"

I turn over in my bed and look up at the angel-like figure that looks down at me. I never really noticed how beautiful Primrose is; with her porcelain skin and her golden locks. It sometimes amazes me that we're related. Everything about us is different. Katniss and Primrose is an oxymoron. She's incredibly innocent and hasn't seen the corrupt world for what it truly is. I'm astonishingly cynical and know that the world really is a complete and terrible disappointment.

"Yeah I'm fine little duck," I say, wiping the sleep from out of my eyes. "I just needed a little rest."

"Well, you ran out of Tobias's house in tears, and you didn't even come back to get me. Tobias had to take me home. And then you ate and barely said anything yesterday and you slept all day the day before. I thought, maybe, something was wrong. Tobias didn't say a word the whole time we were baking." Her voice is full of concern and worry. How did she get to be so sincere and caring when I'm a heartless, selfish, cretin?

I sit up, throw my legs over the side of my bed, and pat the spot next to me. Primrose sits down without taking her hazel eyes off of me.

"I'm sorry, Prim. For everything. For not picking you up from Tobias's house, for leaving you to go to Dauntless. I'm just sorry." I sigh. "I know I'm not the best big sister, but-"

"What are you talking about?" She interrupts.

"I was just apologizing because I know I haven't been there for you and-"

"Are you kidding me?" She asks, incredulous.

"No I just-"

"Katniss, you're the best person I've ever known. I haven't met one soul that has a heart as good as yours. Maybe Peeta, but I don't really know him that well. You're incredible. You took care of me for five years and acted like a mother to me when our real one wasn't there. You've always put me before anything else. You're incredibly selfless and one day I wish I could be just like you. In school they asked me who my favorite superhero was and all that came to mind was an image of you because you're that for me."

I'm speechless. Primrose wants to be like me? Primrose, the ridiculously kind hearted little girl who would cry every time she saw a dead animal? Primrose, the little girl who would pick yellow daisies and give them to the factionless? That girl, she wants to be like me? She thinks I'm the selfless one?

All I can do is hug her and she hugs me back, even harder. "I love you more than anything," I whisper to her.

We sit there for a few minutes, basking in the moment, before she tells me. "You should probably get dressed. Gale said he wanted to take you somewhere."

XXX

After I get dressed, I open my front door to see Gale, in hunter's boots, a cap, with a foraging bag slung across his shoulder, looking down at the empty flower bed in front of the house.

He looks up at me. "Someone should really plant some flowers here. It'll give this drab house just the right amount of color."

"Oh shut up," I say. "Where are you dragging me to?"

"I just thought that since you slept all day yesterday, you might want to get out today."

I raise my eyebrows. What has gotten into him? Basically half of the time we spent getting to District 12, he wouldn't say a word, and now he's all 'let's spend the day together.' There's something phony about his kindness. Like he's hiding something.

"Okay," I say. "Where are we going?"

XXX

Gale and I cross the meadow and stand in front of the chain-link fence that separates it from the woods. Gale put his ear close to it the fence, like he did when we first got here, and then we both slide under.

"So you take me to the woods?" I ask as we climb the hills and meet with a rock ledge overlooking a valley.

"Yes." He says. "I thought you might like hunting."

"And why would you think that?" I joke.

He shrugs. "You just seem like the type of person who would." He retrieves a bow and sheath of arrows from a hollow log and hands it to me. "You're pretty good with the arrow, right?"

I see a bird soaring in the air, just above the trees, and string the bow and let it fly. The bird hits the ground with an audible thump. "I guess you could say that."

Gale examines it and lets out a breath. "Damn," he says. "Right through the eye." He picks up the bird and puts it in his bag.

I take out another arrow. "You obviously just brought me out here to catch all your meat for you. I'll have you know, I'm not doing it."

He laughs as I shoot a squirrel. "Wow. I should take you out here more often. You and that arrow can collect way faster than me and my traps," he says. "It's like it's a part of you."

I look at the arrow. The last time I held one was in a simulation back in Dauntless. Then, I kept missing my target and I got frustrated. Now, it's like I'm free. "I guess so."

"Well, it's yours. You can have it, if you want."

I look up at him. There he goes again with that kindness. It's like he's making up for something. Could it be because that he came back to Chicago so many times and didn't even stop to see me or tell me he was alive? Or is it something else?

"Gale?"

"What?"

"Is everything okay?"

"What do you mean?"

I sit down next to him on the rock. "I mean, before we got here, you barely said a word and it seemed like something was bothering you, and now your acting like everything's all hunky dory like nothing even happened."

He looks down at his hands with this guilty look on his face.

"What? What is it, Gale? What's wrong?"

He exhales. "It's what I was talking about last time we were in the woods."

I recall Gale talking about Panem and how he thought it would be better than Chicago. Our conversation was cut short because that's when Peeta discovered the berries.

I swallow the lump in my throat. "What about it?"

"Katniss," He hesitates. "I think I was wrong. About everything. About Panem being a safe haven, about Chicago, about bringing you here, about everything. I thought it would be better, but it's not. It's much, much worse."

I stand up and face him. "What are you talking about, Gale?" I can hear the own sharpness in my voice. I'm scared of what he's about to tell me. I've never seen Gale so unsettled before.

He takes a deep breath and looks at a spot above my head, avoiding eye contact. "Every year here, they have these games they broadcast-"

"Games?" I ask. "What's so wrong with games?"

"Let me finish," He snaps. "They aren't ordinary games like you would see on TV back at home. People die."

"What?"

"Every district has a public ceremony. They pick one boy and one girl from the ages of 12 to 18 and they send them off to this arena to fight to the death."

"Who is 'they'?"

"The capitol."

"When is the ceremony?"

"In two days."

This sets me over the edge. I'm filled with a blind fury towards Gale. I lash out at him and punch him square in the face. He stumbles and falls to the ground. He puts a hand up to where I hit him, his mouth agape with shock.

"How could you?" I spit. "How could you do this to us?"

"Katniss, I-"

"Primrose could be called you selfish bastard."

He's crying now and I don't think I can ever recall Gale crying before. I feel an edge of sympathy for him but I quickly push it down. He's a monster.

"I'm so sorry Katniss." He says. Despite his tears, his voice is a steady as ever.

I throw the bow and arrow down at his feet and I run.

I run down the hills, through the meadow, across the town and I don't stop running until I'm through my front door. I slide down the door, close my eyes and collapse in tears, which is what I seem to have more and more of lately. When did I get so soft? Or is it when did my life get so hard?

None of that matters because in three days, my sister, Peeta, Tobias, or I could be shipped off to some unknown land and forced to kill or be killed. And it's all Gale's fault. I'd rather be in Chicago in the middle of a war than be here.

"Katniss what's wrong?" I open my eyes to see the blurry figure of a blonde boy towering over me. "Are you hurt? What happened? Where's Gale?"

I just continue crying in response. "Shh Shh Shh, calm down," he says in a soothing voice. Peeta grabs both of my hands and helps me off of the floor. He helps me to the couch where he sits down and I lay down with my head on his legs. "Now, tell me what happened." Looking up at him, I recount the whole story of my afternoon with Gale.

Peeta exhales, "Wow."

I wipe my eyes. "Yeah, I know. He's a bastard."

"You shouldn't be mad at him."

I sit up and look at him.

Peeta truly is beautiful. The way he's looking at me, with such sincerity in his crystal blue eyes, makes me want to believe everything he says. It makes me want to trust him with my whole heart.

But I can't do that. Not just yet.

"Why shouldn't I be?" I ask.

"Because he didn't know. He just wanted to get you out of Chicago because it wasn't safe. All he was thinking about was keeping you safe."

"But that's the thing. He didn't keep me safe. He didn't keep any of us safe! He just brought us into more trouble."

"He made a mistake, Katniss. People make mistakes." His blue eyes search mine and it's like he's looking right through me, looking right through my brick wall that I've put up to keep people out, and right into my soul, looking right into who I really am. "And they make even bigger mistakes when it comes to the people they love."

"But he-"

"Was trying to protect you," He finishes. "Because that's what people do when they love someone. They protect each other."

And then he kisses me. My arms wrap around his neck instinctively, pulling him closer to me, and I get that feeling I got in the woods: that this is what's right. This is how it's supposed to be.

Everything melts away and it's just me, Peeta, and the fire crackling in the fire place. His fingers undo my braid and run through my hair. I inhale the scent of him. He smells of warmth, bread and home.

He lays me down, him on top of me, and kisses me deeply, as if this is what he's been waiting for for days. He traces circles on my leg which gives me goose bumps. I run my fingers through his blonde locks as he twirls my hair around his finger.

I can't even remember what I was upset about. That's what happens when I'm with him. Nothing else matters but us.

Someone clears their throat, I didn't even hear anyone come in, and Peeta and I spring a part, Peeta falling on the floor. I stifle a giggle as I look up to see who interrupted us.

Tobias stands there, glancing between Peeta, with his hair sticking up from where I ran my fingers through it, and me with my, I'm sure, pink flushed cheeks.

"I'll, um," he begins. "I'll come back later." I can hear the hurt in his voice.

"Tobias, wait!" I get up from the couch and start to chase after him, but I stop, looking back at Peeta.

Peeta looks at me and nods his head. "You should go talk to him."

How could Primrose ever compare my soul to his? Peeta is the perfect example of a good person. He's everything God wanted mankind to be. I can't even come close to coming close to that.

I give a little nod and run out the door into the cool starry night.

XXX

I see Tobias walking down the path back to town and run up beside him, grabbing his arm trying to get him to stop walking.

"Tobias-" I begin.

"What?" He jerks his arm away from me and looks me in my eyes. "What could you possibly have to say to me?"

I'm speechless. What did I run out here to say? That I'm sorry for kissing Peeta? Because I'm not. That I didn't mean it and it was just a "spur of the moment" thing? Because it wasn't.

"Don't be mad," Is all I can come up with.

He chuckles humorlessly. "I'm not mad, Katniss. It's obvious you love him. I just wish you would have told me so I didn't have to find out this way."

Obvious? It's obvious? How can he tell when I don't even know myself?

I look at the ground. "I'm sorry," I whisper. "I don't know who I love."

He takes my face in his hands and I look up into those dark blue eyes, that when I first met him, I use to always get so easily lost in. Like now.

"Don't be sorry." He says in his quiet voice. "I actually came over to apologize for the way I yelled at you the other day. I was way out of line. It's not your fault. I just get mad and take it out on whoever is closest to me at that point. I'm so sorry."

He pulls me into his warm embrace and I'm buried in the scent of him, which is so much different from Peeta's. While Peeta's is warm and inviting, Tobias's is cool and intimidating, but I've grown use to it to the point where it actually comforts me.

We stand there in the dark of the night, the stars our only illumination. I can feel is steady heartbeat through our clothes, strong and persistent, and I close my eyes as I listen to its rhythm.

He rests his chin on the top of my head. "I love you," He whispers so quietly I'm not sure if it was him or the wind.

I don't respond to him because I'm not sure exactly who I love.

XXX

When I finally get back into the house, I find Peeta curled up on the couch, a faint snore coming from him as he sleeps.

I smile at how innocent he looks, with his mouth slightly open and his hair still sticking up. I grab the blanket off the back of the couch and drape it over his sleeping body.

I make my way upstairs, into my room, and collapse on the bed and fall immediately to sleep. It's been a long day.

XXX

Christina, Tris, and Will look down upon me, their bodies outlined against the cloudy gray sky. What's going on? I want to ask but no sound comes out.

I'm laying down on something soft and there are dirt walls around me. Am I in a ditch? I try to sit up but I can't move. Help! I try to shout, but, again, no sound escapes my lips.

"You killed us…" Christina says in a robotic voice that doesn't belong to her.

"So now we kill you," They all say in unison.

Suddenly they all have shovels in their hands and they scoop up dirt from the ground and throw it on me. The dirt gets in my eyes but I can't wipe it away. They continually shovel dirt on me until I can no longer see them. I try to scream but it's no use.

I'm buried alive.

"Katniss! Katniss, wake up!" Someone is shaking me and I thrash out, but strong hands catch my fists.

I open my eyes to find Peeta, kneeling by the side of my bed, with my hands in his. His whole appearance is in disarray, like he literally just rolled out of bed. "Calm down, Katniss. It was only a dream. You're okay."

"What happened?" My voice is raspy and my throat hurts.

"You were screaming like you were being hurt or something. I ran in here as fast as I could." He still holds my hands in his.

I take a deep breath. "I'm okay. It was just a bad dream."

Peeta locks our fingers. "Want to talk about it?"

I look down at our hands that fit so perfectly together, it's like they were made for each other.

"It sometimes helps," he continues.

I nod my head and he sits on the bed, in front of me, never letting go of my hand. "So what happened?" he asks.

I sigh and recount the terrible nightmare and then I tell him about the argument Tobias and I had and why he came over tonight.

"So do you feel guilty?"

"Yes, of course! Don't you?"

He finally let's go of my hand and immediately I feel its absence. "Even if I did, there is nothing we can do about it."

I get a thought and look out the window. Maybe, I think, just maybe.

"Katniss," Peeta's voice interrupts my thoughts. "Is there something we could do?"

I shake the thought out of my head. No. We couldn't.

I sigh. "No. But that doesn't make the pain bearable. It just makes it worse."

"Sometimes, Katniss, you have to let things go. What's done is done. If we can't do anything about it, there is no use in making yourself feel like you've done some horrible evil. If you could do something, you would, right?"

"Yeah…"

"So don't get all upset about it." He squeezes my arm and stands up to leave.

"Peeta?" I look up at him.

"Yes?

"Could you, maybe, stay? Here. Just for tonight. I don't think I could go to sleep otherwise."

"Of course," he says. He walks to the other side of my bed, flips the covers over, and gets in the bed, scooting close and wrapping a strong arm protectively around my body, my back to his stomach, and automatically I feel safe, as if nothing bad could happen while Peeta is around. His other hand fiddles with my hair and I close my eyes, listening to the sound of him breathing. I take a strange comfort in the sound, like the sound of him living puts me in a weird state of tranquility.

And then it hits me. It's Peeta. That's who I love, and that's who I've always loved. The dandelion in the spring. I don't know why it's taken me this long to figure out.

Is this what it feels like to love and be loved?

"Peeta?" I ask again.

"Yes?" His voice is low.

"What will happen if one of us gets picked for the Games?" I ask quietly. I know it's a morbid question but I can't stop myself from asking.

"That won't happen." He states without hesitation.

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because," He says matter-of-factly. "I would never let that happen to you."

But how? How could you protect me against the reaping, Peeta? I want to ask but for once, I don't demand an explanation. I just let myself take comfort in the thought that maybe everything will be okay.

XXX

1 Day Before

I open my eyes to the blinding sunlight shining through my window. I turn over and find Peeta gone. All that's left that proves he was ever in my room last night is the crumpled sheets.

I swing my legs out of bed and walk into the bathroom to take a shower and do all of the other things you do in the morning.

When I'm done, I open my door, but I don't smell any aroma of food. I pad down the hallway and down the stairs to find Tobias and Gale sitting on the floor with Peeta sitting across from them, fully dressed.

I freeze in my tracks.

They are murmuring to each other, and obviously unaware of my presence. What could the three of them possibly have to talk about and why are they being so secretive?

I clear my throat and they all look up, abruptly stopping their conversation. I walk over and take a seat on the floor, next to Peeta, and none of them take their eyes off of me.

"So, um, what's this about?" I ask hesitantly.

Now all of them are looking at each other, each of them willing the other to tell me.

"Can one of you just tell me?" I snap.

"Shh, Katniss," Peeta whispers. "You don't want to wake up your mom."

"Then tell me what's going on!" I shout whisper at them.

Gale looks at Tobias and then at Peeta and when they both say nothing, he takes a deep breath. "I guess I have to be the bearer of bad news…again." There is a fading bruise on his jaw from where I hit him yesterday and I feel guilty. Did I really have to do that?

"Tobias, Peeta, and I were just discussing tomorrow."

"What about tomorrow?"

"We, um." He stutters. "We have to put our name in the bowl a second time for the reaping."

I stand up. "What? Why?"

"Katniss, shh," Tobias stands up, puts his firm hands on my shoulders, and looks at me with his dark eyes. "It's to get more oil and grain from the capitol. We need it."

"Why? Why do you all have to do it and I don't?"

Gale walks over to me and puts his hand on the small of my back. "We would never let you do that."

It's Peeta's turn to console me. "This is how we can protect you."

"This isn't protecting me! Putting yourself in more danger for what? Nothing important!"

"We need the oil and grain, Katniss," Gale says. "And we definitely weren't going to let you or Primrose put in your names any more than they have to be in there.

I'm lost for words. I sit down on the couch and take a deep breath.

Gale sits down beside me. "There are still going to be thousands of other slips in those bowls," he reassures me. "The odds are in our favor."

XXX

After I apologized to Gale for hitting him and after everyone was finished reassuring me that it wasn't likely any of them would get picked, I walk outside into the sunny day and take a seat on my front steps. A few minutes pass and Tobias comes out and sits next to me.

"It's a lot to take in, isn't it?" He asks.

I lay my chin on my knees. "Yeah."

"At least you don't have to go through it alone."

I don't respond to that, hoping that this conversation won't go down that road.

"Katniss, you have to tell me," he says. "I have to know before tomorrow."

"Why?" I ask.

He doesn't respond.

How can he demand answers from me but not give me answers when I ask?

"Katniss, please," he pleads, taking my hand. His blue eyes are already filled with hurt. He already knows my answer but he just needs to hear it from me. But can I do that? Can I hurt him any more than I already have? "I need to know."

I don't look at him when I say it because if I see him break, I'm afraid I might break too.

"It's Peeta," I rip the band-aid off. "It's always been Peeta."

He laughs humorlessly and let's go of my hand, "I can't pretend like I didn't know. I knew it since the day I walked in on you two in the infirmary."

I recall Tobias standing in the doorway while Peeta and I lay our foreheads together. I remember not being able to read the expression on his face. But now I can, and it was hurt.

"I'm sorry," is all I can say.

"Don't be," He replies, pushing a lock of hair behind my ear. "We can't help who we love."

XXX

That day flies by fast. Gale explains to my mom and Primrose about what will happen tomorrow, Tobias disappears for the rest of the day, and now it's late afternoon and Peeta and I lay on the grass in front of the house, watching the sun go down. I lie with my head in his lap while he fiddles with my hair like he always does.

"Why do you always do that?" I ask.

"What?"

"Play with my hair."

He laughs. "I don't know why." His hands go still.

"What?" I ask.

"I wish I could freeze this moment, right here, right now, and live in it forever," he says.

I dreamed of this. Back in Dauntless, I dreamed of this very moment. But then, we were on the roof on top of the Dauntless building and now we're in a completely different circumstance. It's funny how things can be so different, but still exactly the same.

I close my eyes. "Me too."

"Do you love me?" Peeta whispers so quietly I barely even heard it.

This is the moment. Memories of Peeta flash before my closed eyelids. The first time I saw him: shooting a gun at a target and making it every time. Him laughing with that sparkle in his crystal blue eyes. Us standing in front of a water fountain. Him telling me, "If I'm going to be Dauntless, I want to still be me." Him standing at the door of the infirmary, a worried look evident on his beautiful face. Us sitting together at the top of a Ferris wheel, looking down on the world below us. Him standing in front of a target as knives are thrown at his head, for me. Me, looking at him through my blurry tear streaked eyes. Our foreheads resting together as he intertwines our fingers. Us talking together at the railing in front of the chasm. And finally, us lying on a blanket together, eating and watching the sun set before our eyes. Nothing is more perfect than that moment. Except maybe this:

I open my eyes. I lie with my back on the grass, staring up into the light sapphire eyes of the person that I have fallen in love with. Peeta is on top of me, with his hands on the ground to elevate himself so he doesn't crush me under his weight. Looking into his clear blue eyes I can finally say it.

"I do, Peeta. I love you," I say.

He lowers his head to kiss me as the sky turns from a radiating pink to a vibrant orange. As the sun goes to sleep, my inner essence is finally awakened.

XXX

Today.

"And so it was decreed, that each year the twelve districts of Panem shall offer up in tribute one young man and woman, between the ages of 12 and 18, to be trained in the art of survival, and to be prepared to fight to the death."

I stand in a group of sixteen year old girls looking up at the temporary stage where a woman in a pink wig and lime green suit, with two glass bowls full of slips on either side of her, stands in front of a microphone.

"I just love that!" Effie trinket exclaims, her pink wig shifting slightly off of her head. In Chicago, no one would be caught dead wearing anything like that. She looks oddly out of place. What, with her neon colors and everybody else in dull whites and grays. She's a rock in the middle of some pebbles.

Effie continues on about how being here is an "honor" and she lists the names of District twelve's past victors.

Through the crowd, I spot Tobias looking back at me. He put his index finger to his mouth and fake gags. I smile at him weakly.

Am I taking this too seriously? Maybe Gale was right. What are the odds? There are, God knows how many, names in that bowl. I only had to enter my name once and I made sure Prim did too.

But then there is Gale, and Peeta, and Tobias. What will happen to them? They entered their names a second time for tesserae, grain, and oil. That increases their chances of getting picked.

I guess that since there are a thousand more slips in that bowl, their chances aren't increased by that much.

So why am I so scared?

"Zinnia Dartmouth" Effie announces. I wasn't even aware that she had begun calling the names. I let out breath that I didn't even know I was holding. I'm safe. Primrose is safe.

When Zinnia mounts the stage, Effie has her introduce herself and then she moves to the boys bowl and reads the name out in clear, capitol accented voice.

"Peeta Mellark."

And it's like it knocks the wind out of me. My heart stops and I'm unable to speak or breathe as I repeat the name again and again in my head, trying desperately to change it into someone else's. I see him standing in the crowd looking up at the stage, wide-eyed and stunned. That's what knocks me into reality.

Someone is gripping my arm, a boy, and I think maybe I started to fall and he caught me.

This can't be real.

Not him.

There must have been a mistake.

Not him.

"I voulunteer!" I smoky male voice says. "I volunteer as tribute."

And I don't believe my eyes as he mounts the stage. Tall and lean, tousled brown hair, face as hard and unfeeling as a rock, deep dark mysterious blue eyes.

Tobias.

XXX

One time, when I was younger, I was working on a science project, without any safety gear or anything, mixing random chemicals and such. I was just playing around until the concoction exploded before my eyes. I fell to the ground, dazed, confused, and in horrible pain.

That's how I feel right now as I'm thrown into a room with thick, deep, carpets and a velvet couch with Tobias sitting on it, his head in his hands.

"You have three minutes," the peacekeeper says as he shuts the door.

Peeta and Gale have already said goodbye. I couldn't bear to look Tobias in the eye. But eventually I had to.

"Why?" I ask in a shaky voice. I wasn't aware of my tears before but now they come in a steady stream.

"Why would you do that? I know you didn't do it for him, so why?"

He looks up at me for a few moments before getting up and wrapping me in his embrace. I inhale deeply because this may be the last time I ever get to smell his scent.

"Please don't cry, Katniss. You already know why I did it."

Yes, I do, but I can't bring myself to say it.

"You couldn't live without him and I have a better chance of surviving than he does. I did this for you."

I can't speak. I'm so stunned, this all is happening so fast. One day Tobias is here, and tomorrow he won't be.

His tone all of a sudden turns very serious. He takes me by the shoulders and looks into my eyes. "Listen very carefully, Katniss, we don't have much time."

I'm taken aback by his straightforwardness.

"I didn't just do that because you loved Peeta. I did it because I know that without him, you wouldn't be able to accomplish what I am about to tell you."

I open my mouth but no words come out.

He goes on, regardless. "In two minutes, the peacekeepers will be here to collect you. I need you to run, Katniss. Run and don't stop until you're back to Chicago."

What? What is he talking about?

"Don't say anything, Katniss. Listen. You, Peeta, and Gale need to go back to Chicago and stop Erudite. We were wrong leaving them behind and it is not too late. It's something bigger than Erudite wanting to take control. It's something that involves you, and you have to stop it, Katniss. Don't you see? I've already told Gale and Peeta what to do. They're waiting for you outside. As soon as he opens that door, you have to run, and don't look back. I'll be fine. Your family will be fine. I can't tell you how I know these things, but I do, and you just have to trust me. You have to trust me." He wraps me in a tight hug and whispers very quietly, "I love you. It's time."

The peacekeeper opens the door mid-sentence and I run. I run down the steps and out into the daylight. Peeta and Gale have appeared by my side out of nowhere. We run and run until we cross the meadow and crawl under the gate into the forest. We keep running and keep running for what seems like an eternity and for all I know, maybe it is.

To be continued...

A/N: Thank you all soooooo much, my God. You are all the first readers of my very first story. I love you all and thank you for going on this journey with me :) I will make another story continuing this one. It's going to be from Katniss's AND Zinnia's point of view. So look out for that. And I am working on another story about Gale and his new life in District 2 after the war. PLEASE read lol. But yeah, I love you all. * tear* I'll answer any questions you guys have. Just message me or post in in the reviews. So thanks, guys. - Tamyaa.