"If you are leader-in-training, then it was idiotic of Peter to provoke you like that during lunch," says Lynn during dinner that night. "Then again, Dauntless women are not seen as strong as the men anyway."
"She handed his ass to him during the last day of stage one," says Will. "You should have been there. It was epic."
"So much about bragging about being the first ranking initiates of the transfers," Lynn grumbles.
"You are aware that he merely ranked first after stage one because he stabbed the eye out of another initiate," Eric points out.
"I am completely aware of that." Lynn stabs her ravioli with her fork. "There was this bullshit story about that initiate provoking the attack. Talk about victim blaming."
"Peter fed me the same bull when I asked him if he had something to do with it," says Eric in reply. "Seems like the little shit told his lackeys, who passed it on to anyone who would listen. Fortunately, he didn't spread that bull about Tris."
"Probably because you beat him up when you caught him," I tell Eric.
"From what I got, I assumed that Peter was your favorite initiate at first," says Christina.
"I don't favor lousy cowards," Eric replies, looking perturbed. "Just by his attitude, I knew that I wouldn't like him."
"But you picked him for your capture the flag team," Christina points out.
"That doesn't mean that I liked him," Eric argues. "Too cocky for my liking."
"Still, I don't understand why you decided to get the tattoo as him," says Lynn, changing the subject. She gestures to one of my forearms. "You two nearly match."
With the bandage off, my right arm and his left arm look like joined pieces of an puzzle when touching each other. It's like the image expanded itself.
"Nearly," I repeat, picking up my fork.
"If you want to match, why won't you get microdermals?" suggests Uriah, laughing.
"No, I'm not going that far," I reply. "That was enough."
Mere seconds later, we are joined by Zeke, Shauna, and Tobias. Tobias doesn't acknowledge me as he sits down. I don't acknowledge him either.
"What took you guys so long?" asks Uriah.
"We had to drag this pansycake out of the training room," says Zeke, rolling his eyes. Tobias glares at him.
"Four being a pansycake?"Uriah shakes his head. "That's new."
"That shouldn't surprise me," says Eric smirking. "It's nothing new, considering that he's actually a Sti –"
Before anyone could think ahead of time, Tobias jumps from his seat and grabs the front of Eric's shirt with his fists.
"Tobias!" I shout, jumping from my seat and running to where Tobias is, just so I could loosen his grip. "Tobias, unhand him!"
Tobias ignores me. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't punch your teeth out," he says to Eric with gritted teeth.
Eric stares at him defiantly. "We know who's in charge, Four. Besides, they already know. It's not like you can keep your actual name a secret."
Tobias pulls back his fist, but I pull his arm back, preventing him from inflicting the blow. "No! Don't!"
Sean and another Dauntless man run from the food line and they both grab Tobias: Sean grabbing his shoulder and the other grabbing an hold of the arm that's holding Eric. The three of us pull on Tobias before he loosens his grip.
I release my hand, and glare back and forth at the two of them. "You two need to stop acting like Lower Levels children! You're both adult men! Act like it!"
I stomp away, not caring if my dinner is half-eaten. I just exit the dining hall, not bothering to apologize to Peter after I smashed my shoulder into his. Maybe Uriah or Christina would eat the food that I didn't touch.
I watch as the punching bag sways from the force of my punches. For the past thirty minutes, I take out my anger: at the recent situation that occurred in the dining hall and at Peter. It's easier to imagine that I'm beating up Peter to a bloody pulp. That he is sprawled on the floor as I land punches and kicks.
As I pull my fist back again, the door to the training room opens causing me to turn. It's Eric, without a doubt.
"Was it really necessary back there?" I demand, crossing my arms. "You were lucky that I was there to prevent Four from punching your teeth out."
"I don't have to like him," Eric retorts, taking a few steps forward. "As I said, this is nothing new."
"But that doesn't make it right!" I point out, the blood rushing to the surface of my face.
"You know, you are sexier when you're angry," he says with his signature smirk on his face, getting closer to me.
"Really? I never noticed," I retorted, pressing my back into the punching bag. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest.
"Yes," he replies and now he's close to me that our noses practically touch. "That angry blush goes with your hair pretty well."
One part of me wants to punch him in the face for being an insufferable person, though the other part wants to kiss him, as a way to take the rest of the edge off. I turn towards the punching bag but at the last second, I lunge at him, locking my fingers around the back of his neck before kissing him hard.
He presses my body with his, my back touching the punching bag. His hands twine into my hair, twisting the strands until they go around his hand. His body is hot against mine and one of his hands reaches down to the hem of my shirt and begins lifting the fabric from my skin.
"No," I hiss, grabbing his wrist. "Not here. Not now."
It's too risky to engage in such an activity here, and it's too soon to have it progress to sex after we been together for only a month. I don't want to go fast.
He pulls away from me, but he doesn't look disappointed that I prevented the making out from going further. "Yeah, it would be stupid to continue here."
"Not to mention too soon," I point out. "We have been together for barely a month."
"If you don't want to have sex yet, I understand," he says. "I don't want to pressure you."
Hearing that fills me with relief, as I don't want to be pressured into going too far in an relationship.
"Somehow, people will not place you doing that," I say, "that you are willing to respect my wishes."
"Then others do not know me as well as you do," he says.
I brought my care materials and a change of clothes to Eric's apartment, locking my own apartment for the night. If this keeps up, I might as well move in with him.
As I shower, I hear him moving around the apartment; probably adjusting it before he goes to bed. He wouldn't be such a hard person to live with, since I prefer keeping things tidy as well. However, it might be too soon to think about living with him.
I turn the shower head off before stepping out of the shower, drying myself before throwing on an pair of his sweatpants and one of his old shirts. He has no objections over me wearing his clothes to bed. I leave the bathroom and walk into the dark living/kitchen area, though the overhead light above his stove is still on.
Technically, everyone in all the factions are supposed to turn off all their lights in their dwellings to conserve energy, though he probably keeps it on at night for an reason. Since he's an Dauntless leader, he probably doesn't want to bump into something if alerted in the middle of the night in case of an emergency. I can easily forgive that reason.
I go over to one of the bookshelves and pull out History of the Ancient World before walking to his bedroom, where I see him already occupying one side of the bed, reading an book. Though he owns books, I never saw him read one until now, and it's weird seeing him with an open book in his hands.
Old habits die hard and I guess that's one of the Erudite habits that he retained. I slip under the covers on the other side of the bed and prop myself against the pillow to sit up as I open my book.
"Usually its one person reads before a couple goes to bed," he notes.
"Well, I'm not Abnegation enough to do nothing before going to bed," I tell him before opening the book. I haven't marked my place, but I don't mind rereading the first couple of chapters.
I allow myself to get absorbed with what I'm reading at first, though something nags at me; something that I haven't asked Eric about since the end of initiation; something that I should have asked him a long time ago.
"Eric, why does Four think you have something to do with Amar's death?" I ask.
He closes his book shut and sets it on his lap before looking at me with an pensive expression. "There is something that you need to understand, Tris. Sometimes, things happen that cannot be explained. Also, it's never smart to take the word of someone who hates their guts."
I nod. "Which is why Four thinks it was you."
"While Amar had the tendency for Dauntless recklessness, he was very smart," Eric says. "Smart enough that he could have passed Erudite initiation if he chose that faction. One thing about Divergents is that their minds work very fast. They tend to keep up with things that others wouldn't usually do, like with that computer programming tutorial. I heard that you were the second to finish."
"Well, Lauren was fast when explaining the basics, but I was able to keep up with her," I say.
"I discovered that Amar was Divergent during my initiation," Eric replies. "It wasn't intentional on my part. I was heading back to the dormitory when I thought I heard Amar and Four talking. I didn't pay any mind to what they were saying until I heard Amar say 'I was like you. I could change the simulations. I just thought I was the only one'."
"What did you do?" I ask.
"I froze in place, just wishing that no one else was around," he replies. "This was before Jeanine gave me that wretched assignment, though I went to Max, saying that there might be a glitch in the system causing people to be simulation aware. I thought he was going to get the technical support. I didn't think he would summon Jeanine to Dauntless."
"What happened to Amar?" I ask.
"Jeanine viewed their simulations and ruled them out as flukes. Keep in mind that Erudite created the fear simulations for the Dauntless and the software has to be updated every four years, because there will be glitches and program errors. However, after I passed the selection process for leader-in-training, Jeanine told me to keep an eye on Amar, for she thought he showed signs of Divergence in the behavioral area. I told her I would, but that wasn't entirely the truth. Then five days before his death last year, he exhibited some knowledge about psychology when talking about the fear landscapes with Four. The average Dauntless attention span isn't much, though I suspected that he retained what he learned at Upper Levels, and retaining information like that is an Erudite trait."
With a chill, I understand what he is saying. I would retain information I learned for an particular school subject and in Biology an few years ago, my desk partner, an Erudite girl, commented that for an Stiff, I seemed to retain a lot of information.
"Are you actually Abnegation, because I don't know too many Stiffs who retain information," she commented one day.
"So, I gave him that 'incriminating look', though I didn't say anything nor did I tell Max," says Eric. "Then, five days later, they found his body by the train tracks."
"Did someone else tip off the leaders?" I ask.
"Though that might be a stretch, I have my mind on Shauna and Lynn's mother," says Eric. "She was within earshot of the conversation as well, and she's the type of person who would blow the whistle to the Dauntless leaders about it, since she's narrow-minded enough to be afraid of something that she doesn't understand."
"Why would you think that it was Shauna's mother?" I ask him incredulously.
"I overheard her talking with some of her friends about how Divergents have loyalty problems because of their aptitude for multiple factions and that what makes them dangerous." Eric snorts, like that idea is malarkey to him. It is to me, too. "Anyway, I can't vocalize it because I have nothing to back it up, unlike Four, who vocalizes his accusation sometimes."
I'm not going to tell Shauna and Lynn what Eric just told me, because I don't know if they too believe that Divergents have loyalty problems. Especially if it's just a circumstantial accusation. That is an Erudite trait: only voicing opinions if you have something credible to back it up with.
"So, it wasn't you," I say. "You weren't the one that killed Amar."
"Even with my ironclad alibi, Four thinks that I was the culprit," says Eric. "He just wants me to be individual that did it. That's all there is to it."
"I told him that it easily could have been the other four that killed him, but I'm not sure if Tobias listened," I reply.
"Four is very bullheaded," says Eric. "Stubborn to where he believes his own intuition over others, even if it isn't true."
The next morning, I eat a bowl of plain oatmeal for breakfast before going to the conference room by the leaders' offices. Idly, I wonder what today will bring, what they will have me do to kick off these months of training to be an Dauntless leader.
When I approach the conference room door, I just knock twice and mere seconds later, someone opens it. Stepping into the conference room, I examine the Dauntless leaders. As I know, there are five of them: two women and three men. I know Eric, Max, and Veronica, though I don't know the names of the other two, though I have seen them during the final examinations. What I notice is that they have the same tattoo running up their necks. It's probably a tattoo signifying their status within the faction.
Just seeing them makes me small compared to them.
"Hopefully you got your sleep," says Max.
"Don't worry," I reply. "I'm a heavy sleeper."
Three of the five chuckle at that and Max gestures to the other Dauntless leader beside him, an severe looking woman with short blue hair. "This is Jackie. You'll be taking her place when your months of training are over."
I take an step forward. "Hello," I say nervously.
Instead of greeting me back, she sizes me up before dismissing me with an glance. I'm sure she preferred for a Dauntless-born or someone else to succeed her, not some girl that originated from Abnegation. Then again, Uriah said that Jackie was one of the three Dauntless leaders that voted to keep Peter in Dauntless.
"Jackie, I'm sure you know who Tris is," says Max.
She turns to him. "You couldn't find someone better to replace me?"
I knew it, just by that dismissing glance she gave me.
"She fits the criteria needed," says Max. "She also has a good vision for this faction."
"Also, you'll be surprised," Eric adds. "You never want to underestimate the former Abnegation."
"Max, I think we should get the ball rolling," says Veronica.
"Yes, of course," Max replies. "Why don't we all sit down?"
The five Dauntless leaders sit in an panel at one side of the table while I sit down in the chair across from them.
Max is the one that starts talking. "Unlike most professions here, this has high expectations considering that this is a government position, which is why you'll be taking a set of skills tests and accompanying us in meetings and patrols during the next seven months." He looks at the other four leaders. "Who wants to explain it to her?"
"I will, since being general is only going to lead to errors," Eric answers.
Veronica puts her face in her hand and groans. Max looks at Eric like he might disagree but he gives him an stiff nod.
Eric turns to me, his hands folded in front of him. "Sorry if I will sound like an Erudite for an few minutes, but since this is an leadership position, it doesn't deserve to have an gross oversimplification."
"Go ahead," I encourage.
"The training you will go through for seven months is going to be very detailed, very strenuous and demanding," Eric explains. "Unlike Dauntless initiation, which tests your strengths in the physical, emotional, and mental areas, this will help train you in the areas of diplomacy, inter-faction relationships, and also, skills on combat and computers aside from overlooking how things are performed in this faction."
This is different from initiation, since this concerns with leadership skills.
"The last three months of the year are very busy for all five factions," says Eric. "Expect to accompany us on meetings and visits to another faction's headquarters, predominately Erudite, since they provide the serums for the fear simulation program. These meetings will teach you about how inter-faction relations are, and you will be tested on the practices of the other factions."
Of all the other four factions, they will be most friendly with the Erudite, especially if Jeanine planted Eric specifically for hunting down Divergents.
"Like stage one of initiation, there is some combat training, but it is brief and tests how well you hold yourself in a fight and how well you fight. You'll be sparring with a private trainer to identify threats from an opponent, as well aim at virtual targets. This means that a Dauntless leader should excel at combat more than the other faction members."
I'm relieved for the three I earned from stage one or else I wouldn't make it.
"You will be educated on the main computer programs that I mentioned earlier, about how they function and the proper criteria to run them. You will go through tests concerning programming and other technical aspects. You will also learn about how to rotate feed, since an Dauntless leader will also monitor situations in this faction and other factions."
I'm glad that it's him that is explaining this to me, since getting a general idea wouldn't be enough to succeed.
"During the seven months, while you will only be replacing one of us, you will be trained in the aforementioned areas by most if not all of us. Once the training commences, you will sign an document that you agree with the faction's ideals. Well, was that too much for you?"
"No," I say. "I felt that this was nothing to be general about."
"Since I have finished explaining what she'll be trained on, Veronica should tell her what she should explain today," says Eric.
He nods to her and she lifts her head up to look at me. "Today, you will pay a visit to the fence. An Dauntless leader will survey the patrols from time to time. Also, you might learn how to administrate memory serum to those on the outer limits in the patrols."
"Memory serum?" I ask.
"Abnegation serum is what it is," says Eric. "Resets your memory and you have to give them details about their life while they're in some sort of haze, so you'll forget what you saw. Usually the Amity inject it, but sometimes an Dauntless leader will. I have injected it twice and it's quite scary to see them go under it."
"Why would the Abnegation have a serum that resets your memory to forget just one thing?" I ask incredulously. "I thought that the Abnegation didn't have an serum."
"Sometimes, there are things outside Amity that are best left to be unknown," said Max.
Next to the conference room is what they call the Temp Office, where I'll be occupying during my training period until I have become official. It's obvious that it's for an leader-in-training, since the filing cabinets are absent and there is just one chair, that is behind the desk.
On the desk is a packet that says Weekly Schedule on the top of it. I pick it up, and look at today's schedule:
10:00 AM – 12:00 PM: Fence patrol overview w/Veronica and Ross
12:30 PM – 1:30 PM: Lunch
1:45 PM – 3:00 PM: File Management w/Jackie
So, they are going to test me what I will learn today. File management is easy to guess. It's probably to organize files within the compound. I turn the page to see tomorrow's schedule.
9:20 AM – 11:30 PM: Visit to Erudite HQ w/Max and Eric
11: 45 AM – 12:25 PM: Revising Memos
12:30 PM – 1:30 PM: Lunch
1:45 PM – 2:32 PM: Currency Tracking System check
It seems like the days have no strict schedule, since I end my training sessions in various times of the afternoons. Flipping through the schedule, I see that I have Saturday and Sunday off, though I see reminder saying: YOU WILL BEGIN TO WORK WEEKENDS ON THE SEVENTEENTH OF NOVEMBER.
However, I find myself returning to the second page just to look at the first thing listed for tomorrow's schedule. I am going to go to Erudite tomorrow morning with Eric and Max. Probably to learn about their inter-faction relation with them, though seeing Jeanine again makes me feel woozy. Another thing that makes me anxious is that I might see a glimpse of my brother.
I doubt he'll recognize me, since I have a piercing, colored streaks in my hair, and tattoos, but he probably might squint and wait to hear me talk to confirm that it's actually me.
And to show loyalty to my faction, I can't acknowledge him. As far as relations go in the view of others, we just share the same last name.