(A/N - I missed yesterday because I was busy, but overall I think I've been pretty consistent with my daily (ish) uploads so I hope that pleases you! Also thanks to CArfwedsonFan91 for her review of the last chapter, and also ConstanceBeauchamp who reviewed chapter 18 and I forgot to credit, as I like to do because I really appreciate all the support I get from you guys!)
"I have a proposition for you…"
Star opened her mouth for a moment before closing it again, unsure what on earth to say. To her surprise, the person who'd just stood up from where they'd been sat on the small bed in the room was Cal.
"W-what?" Was all she could blurt out in her current state of shock.
"Hear me out," Cal requested, not pausing long enough for her to neither agree nor disagree. "I've been thinking, about what you told me the other week, about the baby. I know I didn't handle it the best, or anything over the past few weeks, if I'm truly honest," He continued, and although Star was unaware he was currently suffering a low, and a craving for drugs, as he had run out and hadn't had the chance to get more, "But I want to show you that I'm truly sorry and I want to try and fix this –I'm truly serious about this Star, I promise, I've changed, I'm stopping the drinking for one. I know that's a chance that this baby could be mine, and I do know you have a boyfriend. However I also know that things between you aren't good,"
"How do you know that?" Star cut in, confused as to how he'd know this, but she wasn't aware of Cal's talent for finding things out but on top of this he'd heard them having a brief argument on their way into work one day. He simply ignored her and pressed on,
"Anyway, I think it's only fair that you and this baby have the best chance at life; that's why I think it'd be best if you came to live with me. I don't think its right that you bring up a child in that sort of environment, a broken home, or without a father figure – just like you were. Don't you agree?" He asked, his voice lowering as he approached the end of his sentence. Star stared at him wide eyed; completely bewildered by this suggestion, as it was the very last thing she was expecting to hear him say. She was about to try and formulate some sort of response, but he ploughed ahead once again, not allowing her to get a word in edge ways. He then stepped a little closer to her, and took a brief hold of her hand, "I know that that means you'd have to break up with him, even if that's just to stop people talking, but think it over yeah?" He finished, dropping her hand and leaving as suddenly as it all happened. His tone throughout had all seemed genuine, and almost warm, and it reminded her so much of the man she'd met on her first day – the one that she might not like to actually admit she fell for, at least to some extent, on that one night.
Star stood in the middle of the room for a few minutes, trying to process what'd just happened. A long breath came in and out of her lips, before she exited the room to take the long walk home where for the second night in a row she'd be alone. As she followed the new and unfamiliar route home she replayed her conversation with Cal over hundreds of times in her head, wondering what she should do. Surely it wasn't the right thing to do? He'd hurt her badly before, yet he seemed so different, so genuine this time. What if he had changed and she would never know? Was she truly kidding herself that things with Arthur would pan out again? Here she was again, mulling over all the what ifs. She sighed to herself as she unlocked her flat door after exiting the lift. Her eyes looked over to the clock, realizing that it had now just gone 11, as her detour with Cal had meant she'd got home later than expected. Due to this she wasted no time in removing her make-up, throwing her hair into a messy bun and pulling on a large grey t-shirt, which came to mid-thigh, to sleep in. After this she then headed over to one of the kitchen cabinets and pulled out a plastic day of the week pill box which contained her anxiety medication, among other things. She swallowed them all with a swig of water from a glass she'd just filled, as her doorbell rang. Unsure of whom it was she headed over to go and answer it. For the second time that day she was very surprised as to who she saw looking back at her,
"Ethan?" She queried, shocked to have seen both of the brothers in such unexpected circumstances that day, and also slightly embarrassed at her state of dress. "What's up?" She added, moving to allow him in out of the corridor.
"I can't actually stay," He remarked, sounding a mix of apologetic and almost sad. "Strictly business I'm afraid, so please don't shoot the messenger! I've just had a call from Zoe, a major incident has been declared as there's been a huge RTC on the ring road. The night shifts short staffed, so they need as many of us in as possible, and I remembered you said you'd moved here and it's not too far from me so I said I'd ask," He explained. Star nodded as he spoke,
"That's not good! I'm sorry though, I can't; I've just come home after a shift, and obviously wasn't thinking I'd be needed back, so I've taken my sleeping pills and stuff," She told him. Ethan's brow creased,
"Sleeping pills?"
"Yeah, I've had reasonably bad insomnia all my life but since I fell pregnant it's gotten worse so I got them from my GP. I doubt I'll be much use to anybody in that state so.." She explained simply. He nodded,
"Ah, I see. Well that's understandable, and I'll pass the message on for you, but I should probably get going though – I imagine that they'll want all the help they can get ASAP," He replied, sounding slightly apologetic once again. Star gave a slight nod and walked over to the door to let him out,
"Yeah, see you tomorrow," She answered, before closing the door behind him. She paused for a moment before doing anything else, wishing he could've stayed a little longer so she could've at least asked him about the whole Cal situation. However it looks like that was a decision she'd have to make all by herself.
A very short while after this she headed to bed, as she was beginning to feel drowsy due to the pills. Once again she found herself curled up in the middle of the bed, feeling gripped by the intense loneliness. She could go on like this; she hated the feeling of being alone, and feeling almost unwanted by a lot of people sometimes. It was a joke to her, thinking she could bring up a baby like this, what was she thinking? Surely she was kidding herself that things with Arthur would work? If he was serious about it why hadn't she heard from him and why was fight all they ever seemed to do anymore? Perhaps Cal was right, and it wasn't fair to bring the baby up in an environment like that, where it'd all be so unstable? The comment about not having a father figure had hit her very hard personally, as it was something which obviously hit home with her since it's something she knew about all too well. As well as this she knew he was definitely right about what he could offer her, as well as just material things like money, it'd mean she'd have the companionship which she really felt was missing from her life at the moment, which had been leaving her feeling so empty. It was this though that threw her off, knowing just what'd happened there'd been any form of intimate relations (Or drunken attempt of) between the two of them. Although it'd been many weeks ago she'd still been left slightly haunted by the situation. Thoughts of that was one of the things that really put her off accepting, in fear of it happening again. As well as this the fact that the offer had all come about so suddenly, which gave it all a very weird vibe especially as she hadn't heard a word from him since he found out she was pregnant. She knew that this wasn't a decision she should take lightly, and it shouldn't be hurried, especially as there was of course a baby in the picture which she knew should be of the upmost importance here. Luckily though the sleeping tablets served their purpose, and served as a reprieve from the turmoil her thoughts were in, as they caused her consciousness to slowly fade away and allow her to sleep peacefully.