A/N: I'm alive! I'm not dead... yet. If you want to, I give you permission to kill me. I deserve it. On the bright side, school's over! Actually, it was over on my birthday, about two weeks ago, but my mom signed me up for SAT classes, and things are a bit squished on time. But, if you've made it this far, I thank you for sticking along. Sorry for the lack of updates throughout the school year. Anyway, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I wish I owned The Outsiders. But I don't.

Warning!: Language (and some possible grammar mistakes since my computer was lagging)

Chapter 21: What Happened?

Darry's POV

Ponyboy was... raped.

Oh no, oh no no no no no, no! My little brother wasn't—that's not—he can't—wait... what?!

My mind was short-circuiting.

Doctor Lewis was still going on about something, but I wasn't paying attention. My little brother was raped?! Well, technically, Ponyboy wasn't my brother... but I do consider him as one. I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. Wasn't that what got Ponyboy kidnapped? He was so upset about the news that he ran away and then when he was all alone, he was...

It's all my fault. My fault. If I hadn't...

"Mr. Curtis? Mr. Curtis, are you alright?"

"Wha—huh? Oh," quickly trying to compose myself, I cleared my throat. "I'm... It's just that I'm a bit... uh..."

"Shocked?" Doctor Lewis supplied.

"Uh, y-yes."

He nodded. "That's a normal reaction for such a situation. However, while the damage may be physical, I am more concerned of Ponyboy's mental health. Rape victims are often emotionally unstable and will tend to cut themselves off to others, so if he ignores or doesn't want to be touched, please heed his requests and all. Try to make him feel as comfortable as possible, and give him some space as well. I will be recommending you to a psychologist for treatment, and during his stay at the hospital, he'll be taking some medication for his acquired STD's. However, when he is released, he will still need to continue taking the pills for the full treatment to work."

Doctor Lewis paused and glanced at me.

Truth be told, I wasn't exactly paying attention; his previous words were still echoing in my mind.

He must of have noticed that I had enough on my shoulders as it was, so he gave me a small smile and said, "Son, I think I'll leave you with just that much for now. Go take care of your family. We can talk later when you're a bit better. If you have any questions, you can always ask me or call for a nurse, alright?"

Letting my guard down just a bit, I allowed myself to rub my hand over my face. "Yes, that... that would be much appreciated. Thank you."

With that, the doctor left, leaving me standing in the middle of an empty hallway, my thoughts going too fast for me to comprehend. My thoughts were all over the place. Jumbled around and in one big ball of mess.

I didn't want to believe it. I didn't.

Granted, as a greaser, we've seen more of life than we probably would've liked. But it was our life; the life of a greaser. And Ponyboy was one of the innocent—if not the most innocent—greaser there was. He's as innocent as you can get on the East side. And I wanted to protect that innocence for as long as I possibly could. Sodapop and the rest of the gang probably felt the same—it was an unspoken rule.

And I ruined it.

It was all my fault.

If I had told Ponyboy that he was adopted sooner, he wouldn't have ran out. And then he wouldn't have been kidnapped. Or if only I had chased him down after he ran out the door. I could have saved him from those weeks of torture. So many if's... and I didn't take any of them.

Slumping against the wall outside Ponyboy's room, I drew my up to my chest and buried my head between them.

Ponyboy... raped... shot... kidnapped... lost a bit of blood... stabbed... cuts and bruises... gash on his head... beaten almost daily... wouldn't be here...

"Superman?"

State... court... STD's...sexually assaulted...

"Darry? Hello?"

All... my fault...

"Darry!"

I shook out of my reverie to meet Two-Bit's gray eyes.

"Yes?" I tried to clear my thoughts but I couldn't, though I managed to put on a stoic expression.

I don't know when he got here, I didn't hear the door open. The gang must have sent him out after waiting for me to come back in.

Two-Bit looked at me, his normally goofy nature gone, all the mirth and mischief was gone from his eyes. He sighed, a heavy one, one that conveyed the sense of a man with weight on his shoulders.

Two-Bit opened his mouth, but then closed it again. I waited.

He tried again, but his words got stuck. I guess such situations could even render Two-Bit speechless.

One more time.

"What did the doctor say?" he finally asked.

My thoughts started back up again. I lowered my gaze to the floor.

Should I tell them now? Sodapop was already a mess, who knows what will happen if I told him what that monster did to Ponyboy? Two-Bit seemed stressed enough, and Johnnycakes would probably go into shock from hearing the news. Dally would most likely get up and go find that son-of-a-bitch to kill him before any of us could stop him. Then we'd have to deal with two cases.

Steve looked like the only sane one to be able to take the news, but even then, his anger will eventually take over after him trying to keep it suppressed for Soda's sake, and before you know it, Steve will be hunting that man down too.

Maybe after everyone's just a bit more calmed down, I'll tell them. After everyone's had a breather.

But isn't withholding secrets was what got us into the mess in the first place?

If only I had told Ponyboy...

"Darry?" Two-Bit's voice repeated my name.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Glancing up, I saw Two-Bit had taken a seat down on the floor next to me, and was looking at me in concern, all seriousness. I have never seen that look close-up on his face before.

"Nothing," I ground out. "The doctor didn't say anything."

Two-Bit's eyebrows furrowed. I think he knew that it wasn't "nothing".

It was quiet for a moment before he broke the silence.

"Hey, just because we call you Superman doesn't mean you have to always be super. Superman has his weaknesses too, ya dig?"

Something so wise was coming from Two-Bit... I glanced at him.

What he said did make sense, and I really did appreciate someone being there for me, but...

"But if Superman doesn't stay a hero for the town, how is he going to protect everyone?"

Soda's POV

I didn't know what to do.

I felt so relieved and happy that Ponyboy was back, I felt angered beyond belief on what that monster did to him, I felt like crying because of what Pony had been through, I was scared because of what might happen if the state decided to take him away—in other words, I was a flurry of emotions.

So many emotions were going through me, and I didn't know which one I wanted to unveil on my face to the world to see.

So I settled for a sad expression, but I didn't bawl—I couldn't bawl. All my tears were gone, it felt like someone had sucked all my tears away, and no matter how much I wanted to, I couldn't. I guess those couple of weeks of a crying fest left me with no more water in my system.

On one hand, I could feel my emotions, I wanted to pour them all out; but at the same time, I was numb. Like I couldn't feel anything, everything was surreal.

But through all the haze and pain from my emotions, or lack of them, I knew that there was one thing I wanted more than anything right now.

Right now, I wanted my Ponyboy to wake up.

I wanted him to wake up and open his gorgeous eyes so I'll know that he'll be alright. Maybe he'll be a complete mess after he is fully conscious and gets what's going on, maybe he'll shy away from people, maybe he'll need help and a hand to guide him back to safety...

But even for a second, just a split second, I would want to see his eyes open so I could see the little shine of happy, the little shine of hope—of Ponyboy—in his eyes, and know that my baby brother is going to be okay, even if he's only going to be innocent in that little moment.

His eyes may dull or turn into fear or shock or panic, but in that one moment before he is fully alert, when he is still groggy, I would like to see his eyes.

So I held his hand and murmured nonsensical things to him, in hopes that he'll awake, hoping he'll hear my voice.

I was aware of things that were happening around me—Two-Bit had just left the room to go talk to Darry—but all the while, I wasn't. I felt like I was apart from the world, from my surroundings. There was just me and Ponyboy.

After a while, the door slowly creaked open. This time, I glanced up, just to see Darry's expression, to see if what the doctor said was bad or good.

Two-Bit first entered, and he resumed his position on the floor. I hardly noticed.

But when Darry came in, he shot me and Ponyboy a sad, heartbroken look. A look with so many other emotions mixed in. There was no hope buried deep in them, like he'd given up. I didn't like that look. It meant that whatever the doctor said, it wasn't good.

I turned back to Ponyboy. I looked at his bandages, bruises, and injuries.

Oh Ponyboy... what happened to you?

It doesn't take a genius to know the answer. Just a mere high school drop-out could tell you.

A lot happened.

... Someone can kill me with a heater now, if they wish. Sorry, this was like a filler, but with SAT over my head, my writing skills refuse to work. Grr. I tried by best though. It was still terrible. Sorry for the filler, I'll try and make the next one more exciting. Anyways, if you are still following this story, I give you my millions of thanks! Stay gold!

Jessieklove: The gang will find out a bit later, when the time is right, but their reactions are going to be priceless, I guarantee you that! Thanks for reviewing! Stay gold!

marmarpenn: Thanks!

bigbangtheoryk8: Aw, thanks! I'll be sure to write a one-shot or something with Kevin and Randy when I can!

Rainbows in the Dark: Yeah, on the bright side, IT'S SUMMER! (But then I have classes... *sigh* why can't I be smart like Ponyboy?) Anyway, thank you!

Guest: Whoops, sorry about that. I'll fix it when I can!

a. coco12: Thanks, sorry for the wait. School was torture! But the reactions will be later... and they'll be priceless!

Phoenixx Rising: LOL! Yes, yes it did.

HerBrokenSmile: Thank you! I wouldn't say I'm that good though, as depicted in this failed chapter. Sorry for the lack of updates. But thanks!

panda: Thanks, oh, and senior year! Man, I don't even want to think about senior year yet! I'm only a sophomore! Anyways, hope you did well on finals, I know I didn't. ;P. Thanks for reviewing!

The Curtis Crew: Heheheh. Sorry... but here ya go!

Pony'sgirlfriend: Thanks! Pony will wake up in a bit, so you'll get to see what happens!

Mickiecuteknight: Thank you! Sorry for the filler, the next chapter will have more "action", so to speak.