I know it's been a long time since I've updated and I hope you guys aren't too mad about that. I'll try to get back to my regular updates again and I hope you guys will enjoy this chapter.
WARNING: there is some very fresh language content in this chapter. (It was necessary.)
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"Isn't it ironic?" Nikita said breathlessly as she let the hot flame of the lit up candle make contact with Owen's red chest.
"Plea-Nikita, please!" Owen screamed.
"I mean, you must certainly know how it feels to be cheated on." Nikita continued.
When she thought he screamed too much and could draw neighbor's attention, she disposed the candle back on the drawer.
She knew what she was doing... She wanted Owen to pay but she wouldn't leave any scars that could get her in any type of trouble in case the idiot decides to go to the police.
"You wanna know what upsets me a lot?" She asked as she put the tape back on his lips and pulled a chair in front of the bed.
"What upsets me is that I had to try so much... Fight so much and convince myself to love you even when my heart still belonged to a man-a good man that I left behind for nine years only to have you cheat on me in my own house." She told him.
Tears appeared in the corner of Owen's eyes as sweat dripped down his forehead. "I'm sorry." He said. But it was muffled by the tape on his lips.
Nikita rolled her eyes. "No," She said. "Don't apologize now because it doesn't matter anymore." She continued. "I never loved you, Owen but I was good to you." She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed. "What did that get me?" She chuckled and raised her head to look at a miserable Owen on the bed.
"What did it get me?!" Nikita screamed at him.
Owen flinched... He was a terrified, so shaken... So scared, it almost amused Nikita.
"It got me cheated on, and punched in the jaw." She said as she touched the purple bruise on her face. "A little bit insensitive don't you think?" She asked.
Owen slightly nodded. "Didn't mean to-" He said.
"Excuses, excuses! God what is it with you and your excuses?!" Nikita yelled. "Do you not understand what the point of all this is?" She asked. "You hurt me and didn't even once bother to say sorry!" She yelled. "You're so selfish. All you did was try to win me back like I was some prize."
Owen tried to scream but with his whole entire body taped to the bed, he wasn't at luck.
"We-we can talk." He said. "Please. Take the tape off."
He couldn't believe this. Did he marry a fucking psychopath? Holy shit!
Nikita whipped the tape of his lips roughly. She wanted to hear from him. She planned on making this session so much longer. Even if it took all night, she'd make him pay.
Pay and beg her to stop psychologically fuck with him. Worse torture is mental torture. It can really fuck someone up for life.
Owen took a few deep labored breaths before he spoke. "This is not you Nikita." He said.
Nikita scoffed. "You don't know me. You never did." She told him.
He looks confused and worried. This woman might kill him. God he's been living with a psycho and never knew!
"What does that mean?" Owen asked frightened.
"When we met..." Nikita begin. "Do you remember?" She asked.
Owen nodded silently with wide eyes. "Y-yes." He stuttered.
"It was at a library, I was studying and you hit on me." Nikita said. "Didn't like you at all, you weren't my type because the one man I loved with all my heart, I left him." She told him. "But you were so into me, it was weird. When you approached me and asked me randomly if I wanted to go to lunch with you, I thought you were sweet."
"I'm still that guy." Owen said.
Nikita shook her head. "No-no." She said as he put the tape back on Owen's lips to shut him up. She wanted him to listen, not talk. He tried moving his head left to right but all that got him was a smack in the head and more tape.
"You looked strange... Like why would a guy like you be interested in me?" Nikita started again. "And then I thought that it didn't matter. You looked decent enough for a fuck. I hadn't had sex in a long time and toys weren't really working out for me anymore so I thought if only you were worth something- if only you could satisfy my need for two hours or more, then maybe- just maybe I would have lunch with you." She told him. "That was the plan I had in mind, until you got all 'I'm looking for a serious relationship and you're beautiful and as creepy as it sounds I wanna get to know you and hopefully we might find a few things in common'." She quoted something from three years ago. "Real cute. I thought so at the time." She said as she lit up a cigarette.
She hasn't smoked in so long. Almost twelve years now. When she got with Michael, she gave up a lot of bad habits. He changed her and she broke his heart. That's what hurts most.
And for what? To be cheated on? Punched in the face? Well that worked out so good for her didn't it?
"First date, you were ok, did anything that could impress me. You were a foul but it was alright because you're the first guy I took interest in, hoping you would or could replace the only man that's ever loved me." She said as she puffed out the cigarette smoke. "You failed buddy. You failed!" She chuckled devilishly. "But let's not go about every date you ever took me to or else I'll fall asleep." She said. "Your sense of humor sucked. You could never make a good joke and when you did I'd force myself to laugh because I did not want to hurt your feelings." She said. "You grossed me out most days and when you'd sleep over sometimes and I'd wake up and you weren't him-you weren't Michael, I'd get so pissed, you never knew."
Owen shut his eyes closed. Shit! He's been used.
"But I grew to care for you because you were the first person I let myself get close to in a very long time." She continued. "And then that night came after five months of dating you, we slept together and my toys did way better than you did." She insulted him. Nikita has waited so long to say those things; it felt great to get them off her chest.
"I wanted to kick you out right after that and tell you that we weren't working out." She said truthfully, "But you just had to- you had to be a boy and say it. I didn't like you but you said it. You said you loved me." Nikita said as tears ran down her face. "I watched you tell me those words while you stroked my hair to sleep and that little bit of compassion reminded me of someone I loved and missed so much." She said. "It's the first time I can say you did something right." She told him. "Good job. You nailed that one."
The first candle faded as the clock on the wall ticked three in the morning.
Nikita swallowed hard. "The next morning, you disgusted me less than you would on regular days. We stayed in my little apartment and watched TV the whole day, and we talked about families. You talked about how yours parents died and how you were adopted. I had nothing to say about mines so I had to fabricate a story to you. They seemed similar enough. Almost like we had something in common right?"
Owen's eyes widened. What does that mean? Jesus!
"I lied." Nikita said. "I told you that my parents died in a car accident when I was five."
More tears streamed down Nikita's face as she continued.
"I lied." She repeated as she chocked on her tears. "Truth is, my parents didn't die in a car accident!" She yelled. "And if you even knew an inch of me, the real me, you'd know that I lied but I guess the tears gave it away, right?"
Is this some type of twisted game?
"I never knew who my parents were!" Nikita yelled. "I never knew because my mother died giving birth to me and my father, I wouldn't even know him if he walked by!" She said. "I have issues. Daddy issues because I never had him show me how to ride a bike, he didn't take me to my first day of pre-school! He never read me bedtime stories, and he never told me he loved me because I never knew him!" She cried. "So trusting men, that was a lot for me to handle and then one day, that man, the perfect one that I imagined my father would be like came along in my life and he loved me without questions. When he looked me in the eyes, I saw the father of my kids and the man I wanted to marry for better or worse, for richer or poorer and what did I do? I left him!"
Somehow, everything seems to lead back to Michael and early two thousands
"I grew up, going houses to houses, hoping someone would think I'm good enough and living with fear of not knowing where I'd end up and when I finally had a stable home, what I knew was the perfect family, where I knew I'd be happy, you know what happened?" She asked. "I watched my foster dad slap my foster mother around. I watched him get drunk every day after work and turn her into his whore while he made us kids clean the house spotless. I got bossed around a few times as well. When things didn't go his way, he became cruel." She continued. "The bastard molested and raped the one person that I cared for. He molested a girl named Nicole that used to live with us. She was only thirteen when she got so tired one day and smoked so much and got high. She wanted to fly, so one night, she got on the rooftop of a building and she tried to fly. She took her own life."
Oh my God!
"I spent years getting abused. I'd seen enough and thought about taking my own life too. But then I met Michael and he changed everything. He was sweet and charismatic. He cared for me every passing day that I was with him, and he loved me. He became my everything; my one and only. He helped me through all the difficult times I've been through. I was messed up, broken and he fixed me. He never judged me and he showed me that life doesn't always suck." She smiled finally. "It was only fair that I loved him back. I fell for him and I fell hard. He was my first and I'd never hurt him a day in my living existence but I did. He loved me then and he loves me now and still but he's afraid to love me again, he's afraid to give his heart to me and trust me again because I left him. I hurt the one person that meant everything to me."
Nikita lit up another cigarette and hummed as she inhaled the smoke. "Bu-but I'd never leave on purpose. My son a bitch foster father decided that I was too happy one day and killed his wife because he's sick in the head and thought that his wife was banging our next door neighbor."
Nikita never talked about this. Not even with Michael. Sure he knew some stuff but not all of it. Nobody really knows the entire story and she wasn't about to sit and tell Owen the story of her life in just one night. She was telling him those things for a reason to get to her point. Nobody really understands your situation unless they walk around in your skin. They never really do.
"We live in a world with six billion people and counting, and yet I felt like I'm not being heard." She said coldly as she played with her fingers. "I'm not invisible, I'm right here." She wiped the tears away before taking off the tape from Owen's mouth.
He took a few deep breaths again. "I-I'm so-"
"Save it!" Nikita said.
So he shut up. He didn't want to upset her anymore than he already did.
"So tell me, how many times since we were together have you cheated?" She asked.
This was what all that talk was warming up to. She wanted him to know how much of a bad life she once had and how much it took to welcome any men into her life. She wanted him to know how much his act of betrayal and his physical abuse brought her so far back into her past. Back somewhere she's buried long ago and tried to forget.
"Just that one time." Owen said shakily.
"Don't, lie to me!" Nikita yelled. "Couldn't have been the first time if you had the guts to do it in the room next door!" She said.
"Three times." Owen whispered.
Nikita sniffled. "Three times hunh?" She smiled. "You're sure? That's it?" She asked.
Owen nodded frighteningly. "Yes."
Nikita picked up the candle on the drawer and flipped it upside down and let the grease burn him.
"Do you wanna tell the truth yet?!" She asked.
Maybe he's forgotten how bad of a liar he is and that she's a lawyer.
"Stoooop!" Owen cried. "Pleaaaase!"
"How many times?!" Nikita yelled.
"I don't know!" Owen screamed. "Over fifty times! I don't fucking know! Stop!"
Nikita stopped and settled the candle back on the drawer speechlessly.
"Over fifty?" She repeated. "Wow! You must have enjoyed yourself." She mocked sarcastically. "Bravo! That's bloody impressive! You really couldn't keep that small thing in your pants could ya?"
"I'm sorry." Owen said. "I was a sex addict when I met you!" He revealed.
What?
"I don't give a fuck!" Nikita screamed. "Shut your fucking mouth, asshole!"
He really was. He was in therapy for a few months until he stopped going and thought he could change after he proposed to Nikita. Although he satisfied himself when she'd let him on top of her, it still wasn't enough. She wasn't enough. He had to do it again and again a few times a week to feel completely good and Nikita wasn't at that place in her life where she could have sex ten times a week.
So he lost his job. He went broke when he would spend all his money on hookers occasionally.
Nikita would flip shit if she knows about the hooker part so he kept that to himself. Smart choice after all.
This whole shit is twisted and it just seems like they've both been living a double life and lying to each other at some point.
...
Nikita paced around the room. More than fifty times! How disgusting does that sound? Her lips have been on that thing a few times, they forgot to use condoms on few occasions!
STD's, herpes, cunt worm, so many goddamn diseases he could of catch and transmit to her.
All she wants to do right now is scrub off her body until it turns pale white or bleeds but unfortunately that won't help at all!
"I swear if you had given me a disease, I'd kill you right fucking now!" She yelled. "You're a piece of shit! Oh-my! Fuck you mother fucker!"
Owen didn't dare get a world out. He deserves it.
And because Nikita got so frustrated, she walked to the bed and punched him in the face!
Although her fist weren't as big as his were, she wanted to hurt him. She wanted to hurt him bad!
"I'm sorry!" Owen cried.
"I hate you!" Nikita spit in his face. "You deserve to die!"
She never felt so much hatred towards a man before. It surprised her. She's afraid she might get too upset and die before this motherfucker does.
"You punched me in the face, probably have broken jaw, and cheated on me over fifty times." She breathed heavily. "I hate you and I hope the rest of your life is miserable and the memories of all the shit you've done to me hunt you for rest of your fucking life! I hope your soul burns in hell. I, fucking, hate you!"
She didn't want to spend one more second looking at him. She took her bag and turned around and left. She never wants to see him again, she never wants to hear about him and that's why she's going to accelerate the procedure for the divorce papers. She wants nothing to do with him ever again! Heck, she never wants to hear the name Owen ever again in her lifetime!
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Well that was it! I hope the long chapter made up for the long wait. I'll try to cover some pretty crazy things around the break for this story and just a little spoiler ahead, (there's a little twit coming up and I think you guys will like It.) anyways, please review and let me know what you guys thought of the chapter. Until next time, xoxo my darlings.