AN: Somebody fill me in on where I should go to college already. Seriously. I'm sick on doing scholarships for three different potential places. /shot

Hey, long time no update. Sorry about that. DX Long story short, life was not so kind to me these past few months. The only things I've managed to post lately were written a super-long time ago. OTL This, however, is actually pretty new (and pretty truthful, too), so hopefully it works out.

Because our dear Russia uses the Cyrillic alphabet and his own language for a minute, I just want to point out that he's saying "America, No, I can't. Russia." And no, that other phrase Russia uses in here doesn't actually translate into "capitalist." It's a little more... vulgar than that. Also, BABELFISH: Y U NO ACCURATE? XD

XXX

Chapter 21

Title: Of Communism and Coca-Cola
Main Characters: America and Russia
Publish Date: March 28, 2012

XXX

Damn Commie Bastard,
What the fuck is WRONG with you?
America

America,
In case you have not noticed, I am not a communist anymore. And what is your question asking?
Russia

Damn Commie Bastard,
You'll always be a communist. And I KNOW you can read English! You saw the question!
America

Америка,
Нет, я не могу.
Россия

You ASS.
America

Oh, I thought we were much more mature than that.
But with the name-calling put aside, what is it exactly you want from me?
(Вы хуесос.)
Russia

I want to know why you DID it, that's what!
(WTF does that mean? "You [khuesos?" Wow, Babelfish really screws that translation up...)
America

What did I do? I do not know what you are speaking of.
(It's a less common word for "capitalist," da.)
Russia

You are pretty much SCREAMING to the world, "FRANCE AND ENGLAND NEED TO GET TOGETHER!" What the FUCK!
(Oh, okay.)
America

...I do what?
Russia

You DO! Ever heard of FrUK? Or do you live in a hole - OH WAIT, SIBERIA IS A HOLE. NEVER MIND.
America

Are you going to get to a point in this conversation? Or should I begin to ignore your emails?
Russia

No, seriously! Why the hell do you want them to get together? And through a kind of SODA, seriously!
America

...Perhaps I do not always mean this when I say it, but I have not gotten the idea you are talking about at all. Soda?
Russia

Wait. Wait, you don't know?
America

No... I do not. Please explain.
Russia

Um. Well, this is awkward.
See, apparently, somebody in your country had the GENIUS idea to create a drink called - OF ALL THINGS - Fruktime. France found a bottle of it last week and thinks it's HILARIOUS since he's been trying to molest England for God knows how many centuries, but England is fucking PISSED and out for MY blood! This isn't MY fault! Why the hell he blames ME, I don't know, but I KNOW this was somehow your fault since it came from YOUR country! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU DAMN COMMIE?
...Also, what the heck does a handbell taste like? That's one of the flavors. The fuck?
America

There are probably many things that you would say are very wrong with me. Communism is currently NOT one of those things.
I looked up this product. It is made by Coca-Cola. Is that company not American?
Russia

Wait, it's made by - oh fruk it IS made

My bad, I didn't mean to send that. And I meant "fuck," not "fruk." Um.
...
It IS made by Coca-Cola! SHIT. So... I guess this isn't your fault anymore? (God dammit how do I explain this one to England?...)
America

You're very much welcome, America. You perhaps should just phone him, I think.
Russia

Dammit! You commie, that didn't work!
Hey, you didn't answer my question. What does handbell taste like?
America

Dude, seriously, I'm curious. Please?
Also, England is still pissed. Suggestions?
America

Helloooooo. Handbell flavor. What's it taste like?
And ENGLAND. How do I get him NOT pissed off at me?
...Look, I'll even call you a capitalist! YOU'RE A CAPITALIST. There. Now reply already!
America

In Russian? Will that help?
Вы хуесос, see?
America

Lithuania,
By the end of this week, I would like to have pulled a prank on our friend America. I say you create a false order of Fruktime under his name and his money to send to England. Make it at least 100 liters large, da?
Russia