Author's Note: Okay, so I could type up a few paragraphs about why this took so long, but truth is – life got busy! In the past two months, I have: turned 21 (ohmygodthatwasmessy), cooked a 10 dish Thanksgiving meal for 15 people, had my boyfriend come back to live in NC for 9 months, moved in with said boyfriend in our own first place (well, plus my Great Dane), continued with my college courses, still have a full-time job, and have tried desperately to infuse every part of my life with holiday spirit. Sometimes life just gets intense.
But anyway, here is the next chapter for you guys – a nice long one. Hopefully it won't take as long for the next chapter! I'm hoping to do at least one more before Christmas and then get back into the swing of things. Hope you guys still remember this story and like it!
Also, the song used is Missy Higgins' "Where I Stood." I haven't uploaded a downloadable version yet, but I will!
Disclaimer: None of this is mine. Not even a little.
"You came!" Shane opened the door to let Mitchie pass with the tray of food.
"You invited me," she pointed out. "I hope you don't mind water with your steak…" She slid the tray onto the table that they had shared breakfast on so many weeks ago. Felt like forever to her.
"It looks great," he told her sincerely.
"I didn't make it." She winced at how cold she sounded. She was here to make things right with him, not to freeze him out. "But, I remember you like your steak rare, so here's hoping it's okay for you."
They sat down together and she tossed him a bottle of water. They dug in and after they shared a few pleasantries about the food, an awkward silence overtook the table.
"Shane-"
"Mitchie-"
They spoke simultaneously before breaking out in a somewhat nervous laughter.
"You first," Mitchie said eventually, a soft smile still evident on her face. "Mine'll probably take longer anyway."
"Okay, uh…" he stabbed his baked potato absentmindedly for a few moments before putting his fork down and reaching over to halt her similar motions. "I'm sorry for what I said. I should have listened to you and been less…caustic. You're not a nobody, Mitch."
She let out a very unladylike snort. "That's debatable," she muttered.
"You're not," he urged. "It just took me by surprise is all. I said some things I didn't mean."
"Me too." She spoke softly, her eyes drifting between Shane's and the very interesting half-eaten plate of food in front of her. "I'm sorry I…swore at you. I've never said that before to anyone," she admitted. "Not even to the people that have been terrible to me. It just…came out. I'm really sorry. I regret it."
"Well, I can't say that no one's ever said that to me before, but…it's okay. You want to tell me why you didn't just tell me that it was you to begin with? I mean, I get that it'd be a little embarrassing, but you sort of left me in the dark, Mitch."
He honestly didn't want to start a fight, he was just curious. Mitchie saw that and she thought carefully about how to word what she wanted to say. Just when he thought she wasn't going to respond, she spoke.
"When I first met you…at school, that is, I had just gotten rum and coke poured all over me in front of a world-famous band. And then you heard me playing and saw me…sort of…and I don't know. It was surreal, in a lot of different ways. You remember what I said to you?"
"You said a few things that night…"
"Well, when I said that 'of course I would meet Shane Gray the same night that I get publicly humiliated in front of my school,' or something like that. I honestly don't know which part was harder for me to believe – I met you, or I got embarrassed in front of my entire high school.
"And then I came here and I met you in the woods and you were sort of a jerk, and then I was sort of a jerk, and then you didn't recognize me and I thought…I don't know, that I could keep those two things separate. I knew Kylie was at Camp Rock but I didn't know that she planned to make my life a living hell, or at least not the way she has been. I thought this would be my chance to be a different person than who I was at school, you know? I don't think it ever really crossed my mind to not tell you because I was embarrassed."
"But why didn't you ever tell me once we were friends? I mean, it could've been something we talked about. You never mentioned anything about it. Hell, you never even told me why Kylie hates you in the first place."
"I tried to tell you," she insisted, a pleading note in her voice. "I swear I did. I went to tell you after that stupid Beatles Jam and then you said how…how bad you felt for me." She could feel the tears building in her eyes as she recalled the conversation. That had been almost as humiliating as the entire incident itself. "And I was worried that you'd either not want to be my friend at all or you'd only be my friend out of pity, and…and then…and then you said that I looked lost and…"
Her voice broke as the full realization came to her. She closed her eyes and rested the heels of her hands in her eyes, trying to staunch the flow of tears.
Shane got up the second she stopped speaking and kneeled in front of her, beside the table.
"Hey, it's okay." Shane rested his hands on Mitchie's knees, causing her eyes to pop open. "Everyone gets a little lost. That's how we find ourselves."
"Are you telling me your feelings or are you quoting a song?" She joked, sniffing a little. A slow smile spread across his features and Mitchie couldn't help but mirror a slightly dimmed down version. "I'm sorry," she gestured to her tears that were slowing. "I swear, I don't usually cry this much."
"Meh," he waved a hand nonchalantly. "I'm used to screaming, crying girls, so it's no problem."
She shoved his shoulder lightly. "Jerk."
"Maybe," he said with a wink. He handed her a napkin and she wiped her eyes gently.
"Good thing I've already had to wash my face like three times today, or else you'd be looking at a raccoon right now."
"Things have been…tough…today?" Shane stood and backed up a few steps and sat on his bed.
"Things are always tough, Shane," Mitchie said wisely. "But I seem to have managed to aggravate the fangirls to a new level today."
He gave her a questioning look.
"Girls seem to be under the impression that I…um, broke your heart." She felt her face flush as she admitted that. She wasn't saying that it was true or that she had any effect on his heart at all, but still…
Shane winced. That'd explain the excess of dirty looks he noticed in her direction. He wasn't ready to deal with the truthfulness of that statement, so he decided to take the more traveled route: avoidance.
"Good thing you put it together then, huh?"
She rolled her eyes at him and stood up, stretching, suddenly very aware at her plain, mundane outfit of shorts and a tank top. She couldn't have thought to change before dinner with a Popstar, could she have?
"I should probably…"
"Oh no you don't." Shane was up in a second, grabbing her wrist and pulling her to his bed with her. He scuttled up and sat against the headboard, motioning for her to do the same. He reached into the nightstand to the right of him and pulled out a big bag of peanut M&Ms, placing them in between the two of them. "You can't leave yet. We haven't had dessert."
"In that case…" She dug her hand in and grabbed a handful, popping a few in her mouth.
"And you haven't told me why Kylie doesn't like you to begin with."
She almost choked on the M&Ms. So much for just dessert.
"It's a long story…" she hedged.
Shane looked at his watch. "It's only 6:30. We've got all the time in the world."
"Okay then. Um, well, long story short, I dated a guy, broke up with him, and he managed to get everyone in my high school to hate me. Kylie is just taking that to an extreme level."
"Why would someone do that?" Shane was surreptitiously trying to put all the yellow M&Ms back in the bag.
"I see you doing that, you know. Why aren't you eating those?"
"I feel bad eating the yellow peanut ones since he is the animated peanut one in the commercials, if you must know. And don't avoid the question."
Mitchie held back her laughter – barely – at Shane's cute explanation, and tried to focus on what he wanted her to answer. Oh yeah. Joey.
"We dated for…a long time. His name is Joey Carter, his dad is that famous NASCAR guy. Things used to be good between us, but then…not so much." Mitchie played with the M&Ms in her hand, feeling sort of embarrassed. "This might sound stupid, but he just…didn't let me be me, you know? He wouldn't let me talk to the people I wanted to talk to, he would never let me talk to other guys, he planned out every second of my life, he would follow me places sometimes, just to make sure that I was doing what I said I would be. He was just…everywhere, and it was really starting to get to me."
"That doesn't sound stupid, Mitch. That sounds…insane."
She let out a breath of relief that Shane understood. She had tried explaining it to her mom and she had just blown it off, saying that Mitchie was overreacting. That she should consider herself lucky to have a guy that cares that much about her.
"You're telling me," she sunk herself into his pillows, feeling that much more comfortable with the conversation now that she knew that Shane wouldn't think she was being stupid. "I had to change my phone number three times after we broke up. Even after, when he made it clear how much he hated me, he'd still show up at my work, or follow me places. I don't get why, but he did. Does. I don't know."
"Did you ever consider getting something like a restraining order against him?" Shane asked. Mitchie laughed aloud at this.
"I have absolutely nothing to go against him with except for the fact that he has turned into a major creep. Besides, he has so much money that he can buy his way out of any kind of trouble; trust me, I've seen it. I just wish I knew why."
"Sounds like he's still hung up on you." Mitchie scrunched up her face in confusion. It did? "Don't get me wrong, he's hung up on you in the creepiest sense ever, but yeah."
"I wish he wasn't," she muttered darkly. "He's ruining my life."
"And these girls – Kylie and all of them – they just go along with it?"
"Well, Kylie never liked me to begin with. She was actually a year ahead of me, but she stayed back this past year to redo her senior year." They both got a good chuckle at that. "But yes, they just go along with it. Joey was my ticket in. He was the only reason I even got to meet those people. I don't come from money; they never would've given me a second glance if it wasn't for him."
"And so they're mean to you because of that?" She shrugged. "Mean to you how?"
Mitchie froze. She stopped tracing the M&M that was now leaving blue melty trails along the palm of her hand. She stopped breathing. How was she supposed to answer that?
"You know…" She popped the M&M in her mouth and licked her palm, unaware of the darkening in Shane's eyes at that action. "Same stuff they do here, really."
"What do they do here?" He wanted to hear it from her mouth, to really see things as she saw them.
"You know," she repeated. "Trip me, or pour stuff on me. And, I mean, they just do other, high school girl stuff."
"Like what?" He pressed.
"Like…I don't know. Stupid stuff. Spraypaint words on my locker. Prank call me. This girl, Melissa, got me fired from my job…somehow, I'm not even too sure on the details of that one."
"Wow, Mitch, I had no idea…"
"Don't. I mean, it's fine. It's just high school, right? It'll be over after a year and then I can get out of there. I just have to survive that long."
"You know, if you ever want to talk about it…"
She sighed. "I don't know if I'm just not used to talking about it or what, but it's not going to make a big difference either way, right? I mean, there's nothing I can say that's going to change the way things are. And I don't want you to…to pity me because kids are mean to me."
"I don't pity you, Mitch."
"Why not? Kids are mean to me!" She said in a petulant voice, coaxing a smile out of him.
"Hah hah," he said, poking her in the side. "I just mean that knowing all this…I think you're pretty amazing."
"You didn't think I was amazing before?"
"You are just full of sass today, aren't you?" He poked her again. "What I'm saying is that now, knowing all that you deal with and seeing how you handle it so well, it makes you seem even more amazing."
"Handle it well?" She scoffed. "Shane, you've seen me cry like, five times today. That is in no way 'handling it well.'"
"Yeah, well, you're a female, sooo…"
That earned him an elbow to the side, but it did make Mitchie laugh, too. She repositioned herself, settling her head against his shoulder comfortably. Shane lifted her up slightly and then settled his arm around her shoulders.
"So, are there any other of my most humiliating moments that you'd like to know about?" Mitchie questioned in between M&Ms.
"Not so much humiliating, but do you think…maybe you could, um, play the song you were singing in the auditorium that day?"
"Right now?" She craned her neck up to look at him, disbelieving. She had just gotten comfortable!
"Nah, but maybe sometime this week? I told you that I still hear it in my head, and I only heard maybe two verses at the most…"
"It's not a very happy song," she warned. "I played it for him when I broke up with him. I thought it'd help him get over me and explain some things but…not the case, apparently."
Mitchie felt her eyes start to grow heavier as her and Shane chatted; they had both not gotten very good nights of sleep in the past two days, and she hadn't realized how calm she would feel after clearing the air between the two of them.
"I wrote a song after hearing you sing that time in the auditorium, maybe I could play that for you sometime, too. You could tell me what you think." Silence greeted him. "What do you think, Mitch?"
"Yeah," she said softly.
"Are you falling asleep on me, girl?"
"Yeah," she repeated.
"Are you going to stay asleep?"
"Yeah."
"Are you going to remember this conversation?"
"Yeah."
He knew that was a lie as he felt her body slowly become dead weight against him. He decided that he could probably use a few more hours of sleep, and it was early anyway, and it had nothing at all to do with the fact that Mitchie felt so right against his body and it had nothing at all to do with the sense of comfort he got knowing that she was with him and not mad. It was none of those things at all. Right?
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"Shh!"
"But I wanted to work on my birdhouse!"
"Be quiet, both of you!"
Shane didn't open his eyes as he became aware of what was going on in his cabin, but he could already envision the scene in front of him. As he peeked one eye open, he wasn't disappointed. Caitlyn stood at the foot of his bed with Jason and Nate flanking her sides with her hands securely covering each of their mouths. She was wearing a shit-eating grin and he could only assume that his two bandmates were too, underneath her hands of course.
"Please be quiet," Shane finally said as he opened both of his eyes.
"You're awake!" Caitlyn whisper shouted.
"Thanks to you."
"Shh!" Caitlyn gestured wildly to Mitchie's still sleeping form.
"She can sleep through an earthquake," he informed the group. Caitlyn slowly let her hands down from Jason and Nate.
"You two are so cute!" Cait squealed.
"Just because her ear drums won't burst doesn't mean ours won't," Nate complained as he backed away from the loud girl.
"Oh, please. So you two made up then?" Caitlyn shot a pointed look at Shane, daring him to defy her.
"Yes. We did."
"And…?"
"And what? We made up. We talked about it and now I know the whole story."
"The whole story?"
Shane sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yes, the whole story. I know all about Joey and all about Kylie. The whole story."
"Just checking, sheesh!" She turned and grabbed Jason and Nate who were still staring at Shane and Mitchie. "We'll just go and find…something else to do."
"Wait! What time is it?"
"Just past nine. We were just going to watch some TV, but…"
"No, it's cool. You guys can stay and watch. We're just friends. Hanging out together. One of which happens to be asleep."
"Oookay then…" Caitlyn let go of the boys.
"Yay!" Jason exclaimed and promptly jumped on Shane's bed with him and Mitchie, prompting her to wake up.
"What's going on?" She murmured sleepily, stretching beside Shane.
Shane let out a little laugh and brushed some hair out of her face.
"Guess we fell asleep," he told her softly.
Nate and Caitlyn watched from across the room as they settled in on his bed, against the headboards. Nate couldn't actually believe that the guy lying on the bed across the room was Shane Gray. A sensitive, caring, sweet Shane Gray. He had seen Shane with girls before, and those adjectives never came into play. He got girls by being a mean, arrogant jackass and by virtually not paying attention to them. They latched onto him and he would eventually give in and play with their heads a little, then let them go. He had never actually seen him care about someone like this before. And try as he might to deny it, Nate knew that Shane was starting to fall – or had already completely fallen – for Mitchie. It just never got less shocking to see him act the way he did around her.
"They're so funny together," Caitlyn said to him softly, looking at the other bed. Shane was resting his chin on Mitchie's head as she listened to Jason talk animatedly about something. "He seems to not have an issue with Jason when he's the one that has Mitchie in his arms," she noted.
"They're in over their heads," Nate decided as he flipped on the TV in the corner. Mitchie was now reaching behind her and smushing Shane's face up, causing both her and Jason to launch into uproarious laughter. "Way over their head."
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By the time Thursday rolled around, Shane and Mitchie were back to their normal selves. No more awkward silences and no more heart-wrenching talks. Mitchie had spent Tuesday night working on Jason's birdhouse, assuring him that she had called her dad and would be getting some extra supplies for it that weekend (he was over the moon), and then Wednesday, a summer storm had made the camp into a mud pit. They had joined the rest of the campers in the mess hall for board games for a while, but it didn't take long for Caitlyn and Mitchie to talk the boys into playing outside in the rain. Well, talk Nate and Jason – Shane was worried about his hair, but he jumped right up after Jason had agreed to join them. They had played for a long time, getting completely disgusting in the mud and rain, and it was the most fun Mitchie could remember in a while.
So now, on Thursday, people were starting to talk about the upcoming Friends and Family Jam, debating what they wanted to do and how they wanted to do it. The group was gathered after dinner around one of the many campfires that were going along the shore of the lake.
"It's on fire!" Mitchie yelled to Jason, who had conveniently forgot that he was holding a marshmallow over the fire for a s'more. He looked back to the task at hand, only to see his marshmallow completely melt off and fall into the fire.
"That's the third one!" He cried unhappily, but he got over it fairly quickly and speared another marshmallow onto the end of his stick.
They had let Jason sit on his own log by the fire and man the bag of marshmallows and the graham crackers and chocolate. He was at first put off by this, but after Shane assuring him that it was like the position of Banker in Monopoly (apparently Jason was never allowed to play that), he was much more eager to comply. Nate and Caitlyn were sitting cozily next to each other, along with a few random girls at the end of their log. Shane and Mitchie had a log to themselves, due partly to Shane's fame and partly to Mitchie's lack thereof. While the dirty looks themselves hadn't subsided throughout the week, Mitchie had to admit that Shane and her publicly hanging out had definitely helped her social situation.
"Here, get some crackers," Shane told her as he pulled a marshmallow out of the fire.
"It's all burnt, though."
"Mitchie, Mitchie, Mitchie, have you never had a burnt marshmallow before? It's the only way to eat them!"
"That's like char-broiled, Shane." She was giving the marshmallow the side eye, but continued to break apart the chocolate and put it on some graham crackers. "I can't believe you're going to eat that."
"Oh, I'm not. You are."
"Whoa! I never agreed to that!"
Shane slid the marshmallow and it's crispy exterior onto the chocolate slab, making it start to melt almost immediately.
"You won't regret it," he told her sincerely.
"How do you get me to do things that I've never done before?" She muttered as she tentatively took a bite of the intimidating s'more. She had to admit that it was…different than she expected. She didn't taste any of the gross burntness she had been anticipating, instead it was just a little crunchier and a lot hotter than she had expected.
"Drink!" She mumbled through the inferno that was her mouth. "Drink!"
The next five seconds were like something out of a James Bond movie. Someone had (not kindly) chucked a bottle of water at Mitchie, probably intending to hit her, and suddenly, Shane's hand reached out and just…grabbed it out of nowhere. One second he was sitting beside her, trying to locate his own bottle of water at his feet whilst simultaneously chucking at her and then the next, he was sitting up straight, holding a bottle mid-air.
"Whoa." He stared awestruck at his hand, marveling at his capabilities. Mitchie just rolled her eyes and grabbed it from him, eagerly guzzling down the cool water.
"I am amazing," he declared after she had finished and shoved the bottle roughly back at him.
"Yeah, yeah, well, I'm burnt." Mitchie leaned closer. "Do you see anything?" She stuck her tongue out for him to peruse in the firelight.
"Umm…" He leaned in closer, close enough for Mitchie to… "Ew! You licked my nose!"
"You've licked my hand before!" She countered with a cheeky grin.
"Touché," Shane acquiesced. All he got in return was a wide smile.
"Disgusting." Kylie Stile was suddenly behind her with her posse of about 8 kids, all glaring daggers at Mitchie. She didn't think that Kylie would try something right now, especially with all the counselors around (she saw Brown trying to make his way over from a little ways away, probably trying to prevent trouble before it started), but Kylie was always a mystery to Mitchie anyway.
"Are you two going to do a lovers duet for Friends and Family Weekend?" Kylie asked in her overly nice tone, which always had an undercurrent of pure evil as far as Mitchie was concerned. Mitchie just stared at her blankly, confused. "You two have made it official by now, haven't you?"
"We're not dating, Kylie," Mitchie told her while cursing herself for having her voice not be as strong as it could be. She hated showing any weakness to her.
"You're…not?" Kylie's eyes traveled down to where Mitchie's hand was resting casually on Shane's leg. She instantly picked it up and dropped it in her lap.
"We're just friends." As much as I wish things were different, they're not, Mitchie told herself. The last thing she needed was for her to slip up and confess her feelings to Kylie Stiles of all people.
"Aw, bummer." An evil smirk appeared on Kylie's face and Mitchie felt herself tense up in preparation for whatever was about to come out of her mouth. "I was hoping you two could double date with me and Joey."
Mitchie felt her stomach drop to her shoes.
"After all, it is Friends and Family Weekend. Of course my loving boyfriend will be here," Kylie continued. "That won't be weird for you, right? I mean, everyone else here hates you, what should one more person really mean? Even if he is the person that hates you the most, after you threw him away like yesterday's trash. I guess no one told you that you are the trash…"
"Kylie," Shane began at the same time that Brown managed to worm his way over.
"Miss Stiles," he said once he was within earshot, shooting Shane a silencing look. "Why don't you and your friends go enjoy some s'mores over at that campfire?" He pointed to one several yards away.
"Eat all that chocolate and sugar? No thank you, I'm actually trying to not be a heifer. That's something that most guys like." She directed that last comment to Mitchie and tossed a sensual wink to Shane, whose eyes widened in what could only be described as paralyzing fear.
Mitchie had no idea what possessed her to do what she did next. She would later tell Caitlyn that it had to have been the beginning stages of a sugar coma, but at that moment, all she could think of was how Kylie Stiles was so convinced she was better than everyone.
Mitchie picked up Shane's hand, still gooey from playing with the burnt marshmallow and she locked eyes with Kylie.
"Thanks for the advice," she said as she lifted Shane's fingers to her mouth and sucked off the marshmallow residue that was there, causing just about everyone's mouths to drop, including Shane's.
"Alrighty then," the grin could be heard in Brown's voice as he ushered Kylie and her friends away, trying not to laugh, which proved to be unsuccessful as he thought back on the looks on everyone's faces.
As soon as they were out of range, Mitchie turned to Shane, her cheeks a deep red.
"I am so sorry!"
"What the hell was that?" Caitlyn questioned in between bouts of laughter that had both her and Nate hunched over.
"That was…interesting," Shane managed to get out, shifting a little in order to hide his true reaction. "Not exactly expected, but…interesting."
"I have no idea why I did that! Well, I do, but I didn't mean to and then…oh gosh, you must be so embarrassed!"
"He is?" Nate scoffed. "You look like a tomato, Mitchie!"
"Excellent," she muttered, letting her hair cover her face.
Shane swept her hair behind her ear, turning her face towards him. He was a lot of things right now but embarrassed wasn't one of them. More like turned on, completely infatuated, borderline obsessed with her, but no…no embarrassment.
"Did you see the look on her face, Mitch?" A huge smile spread across Shane's at the memory. "That was priceless. Don't ever apologize for that. Just…uh, give a guy some warning next time."
"Deal. Next time I decide to suck on your body parts publicly, I'll give you warning," she said dryly. Shane had to once again reposition himself.
What is your deal? He mentally berated himself. She is Mitchie. She is your best friend. She is not a sexual being. Although if she were to suck on something else like that, it'd definitely be sexual…stop it! Oh, Christ. She's too perfect for words.
Shaking his head to rid himself of his traitorous thoughts, Shane focused on the group in front of him once again.
"I'm confused," Jason whined, causing everyone to erupt in laughter.
Shane and Mitchie decided to let Nate and Caitlyn take over the task of explaining what just happened to Jason.
"Let's go," Shane whispered to her, standing up and offering her his hand. She took it tentatively.
"Go where?"
"Well, with this next Jam coming up, I figure the camp needs to hear another Mitchie Torres original. And I believe you promised me a performance of a certain song," he told her as he pulled her up to stand next to him.
"Now?"
"Do you have a better time? At least we know where everyone is," he argued.
"Okay, okay, fine. Let's do this."
"We'll see you guys later," Shane called as he slung his arm around Mitchie's shoulders (If Jason can do it, I can do it, he told himself). He looked to where a flustered Jason was sitting as Nate tried to explain the little dispute that had just occurred with Kylie. "Good luck with that, man," he told Nate.
"Bye guys!" Mitchie ran a hand through Jason's hair affectionately as they made their way past him. "Bye Jase."
"See you tomorrow!"
Shane pulled her just a little bit tighter as they walked away from the group.
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"Are you worried?" Shane asked Mitchie as they made their way through the winding paths towards the mess hall.
"About what? Playing for you? You've heard me play before."
"No, not about that. About Joey coming up for the weekend."
"Oh, that." Mitchie was suddenly very interested in the cuff of her zip up hoodie. "I don't know. A little bit. You haven't seen him and Kylie together, they can just be awful and…okay, so I guess you have seen them together," she amended at Shane's pointed look. "He used to be a nice guy, but now…"
"Well, now you've got me and the guys. And Caitlyn, who may or may not be scarier than us."
She had to laugh at that. "I'm not sure if having you guys is a good thing or a bad thing."
"Why's that?"
"I just don't want you guys to get caught in the crossfire is all."
"Girl, that's why we're here. We get caught so you don't have to."
"You're a dork," she joked, pushing open the doors to the mess hall.
"You wound me! But don't worry, I know your secret, Mitchie Torres."
"And what would that be?" She turned around only to be face to face with Shane, their chests touching if they were to breathe deeply. She looked up in his eyes, surprised by the darkness that was there. He tenderly brushed a lock of hair behind her ear, smiling gently at her.
"You may be just tough words and sarcastic comments on the outside, but on the inside you're just full of rainbows and unicorns. You're a marshmallow, Mitchie Torres. A burnt marshmallow."
If someone were to be listening in, that one statement would mean very little to them. But to Mitchie, who was standing there, an inch away from Shane Gray the Popstar and former jerk, it was so much more than just words. From the undecipherable look in his eyes to the small smile that wanted to grow, she did the only thing she could think of.
"Maybe," she replied softly, and swiftly leaned up and placed a kiss on his cheek. She turned just as fast and started making her way to the baby grand piano that she had come to know and love. "Well this marshmallow is about to get gooey fast if you're going to make me play that song."
"What's the name of it?" Shane asked as he followed her into the hall, ignoring the tingling sensation left on his cheek.
"Well, I've been calling it 'Where I Stood,'" she told him, situating herself at the piano and pulling out her songbook. She rolled her eyes as she propped it up in front of her. "Force of habit, I guess. It's not like I don't know the words, but it has been a while since I played it."
"Have you played it since…?"
"No, not since that night," Mitchie confessed. "Ready?"
"Take it away, girl," Shane said as he slipped onto a nearby table.
She began with a simple strain of piano and just her voice, as haunting as ever.
"I don't know what I've done
Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run
And honey, you know me
It's all or none.
There were sounds in my head
Little voices whispering
That I should go, and this should end
Oh and I found myself listening."
She gathered her strength for what she had deemed the chorus. She didn't realize how hard it would be to play this song for Shane, especially a Shane that knew the entire back story.
"'Cause I don't know who I am,
Who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand
Another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cause she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood."
She focused all her energy on forcing the tears back in her eyes as she continued playing for him. His stare bore into her from across the piano and she had to fight to remain composed.
"See, I thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you ain't leaving without a fight
And I think I am just as torn inside.
'Cause I don't know who I am
Who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand
Another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cause she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood."
The first tear trickled down her face as she remembered the look of sheer pain on Joey's face as he heard her play this song. But she knew it now just as she knew it then: she had made the right decision. The relationship she had with Joey wasn't healthy. It was nothing good and she needed to get out of it. And in the end, it was going to be worth it. It had to be.
"And I won't be far from where you are
If ever you should call
You meant more to me than anyone
I ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself
And so I say to you:
This is what I have to do.
'Cause I don't know who I am
Who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand
Another hand upon you
All I know is that I should…"
Mitchie broke off. She was barely discernible as it was; the tears were coming down so fast. In an instant, Shane was on the bench with her, hugging her tightly to his chest.
"All I do is cry on you," she mumbled into his shoulder. "I get your shirts all wet."
"It could be worse," is all he said.
They stayed like that for a while, until Mitchie's tears dried up. She pulled back, wiping her eyes carefully.
"It still sucks, huh?" Shane asked not-so eloquently. She shrugged.
"I don't regret it at all. I really didn't know who I was with him…he was so controlling and demanding and it was just so hard all the time. But yeah, it sucks that he's made it his personal mission to ruin my life. I didn't see that one coming. I gave him a lot and that's all I seem to have gotten in return."
"I'm glad you don't regret it," Shane told her softly, the only light in the room coming from the moon filtering in through the screened windows. "You seem happy. That is, when you're not getting drinks poured on you or getting screamed at by jerky Popstars."
"I think I am happy. For the most part, at least." She cast a sidelong glance at the boy sitting next to her. "What about you, Popstar? Are you happy? You're not a jerk anymore, so I know it's gotta be tough for you…"
"Hah." He nudged her with his shoulder playfully. "It was never that much fun, I'll have you know. Being a jerk isn't all it's cracked up to be. But, to answer your question…yes. I think I am happy. I think I'm finally learning what it means to be happy."
"Me too," Mitchie agreed, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Me too."