I think this is the longest chapter yet….hope you guys enjoy it…thanks again for still reading…..
Chapter 21: Rendezvous
Next day: Cooper Mansion
Alex was in Marisa's room, hanging out and chatting. The two are cuddled up on Marissa's bed and lying beside each other.
"Marissa, would you go out with me tonight?" Alex said softly at her while stroking the girl's face.
"Tonight?" Marissa said looking at her.
"Yes!" Alex said nodding at her.
"Like on a date?" Marissa said excitedly.
"No?" Alex said shaking her head "we'll just go outside and hang!"
"oh?" Marissa said disappointingly as Alex lets out a small laugh.
"Of course, like on a date" Alex added "silly!"
"Really?" Marissa said sitting up straight "I would love nothing but to go out on a date with you!"
"Really?" Alex said smiling sitting up as well "me too!"
"That's good to hear!" Marissa said then leans in to kiss her.
The kiss was slow and loving, feeling both their lips with each other as they opened their mouth and let their tongue battle it out. Alex sucked Marissa's bottom lip, receiving a moan from her as Marissa felt her heart racing again. The two were making out heavily until Alex pulled away.
"So I'll pick you up later…. 8 o' clock?!" she said as she touched her lips that is now swollen because of their heavy make out.
"Yeah, 8 it is!" Marissa said breathing heavily then kissed Alex goodbye.
Marissa took 3 hours to get herself prepared for their date. She was ready to pass out until she found a dress that suits her best.
7:50 pm at Marissa's room
"Marissa, Alex is here!" Julie said loudly knocking on her door.
"I'm coming!" Marissa said excitedly then walks out of her room.
"Oh my God! Marissa you look amazing!" Julie said her mouth slightly agape.
"Do you think Alex would like it?" Marissa asked turning around for her mother to see her completely.
"Of course! She's crazy if she won't?!" Julie said smiling at her.
"I'll go ahead mom!" Marissa said kissing her cheeks.
"Remember to use protection ok?" Julie said with a straight face.
Marissa just rolled her eyes then said "Bye mom, don't wait up!"
"Enjoy the night honey!" Julie said happy for her daughter.
"We will!" Marissa said as she walked towards the stairs. this is it
Downstairs.
Alex was sitting on the couch fidgeting with her hands as she waited for Marissa to come down.
I didn't think I'd be this nervous...it's just a date...it's been awhile since I have been on a real date...but let's not go there right now...I'm on a date with Marissa...that's all that matters now...
Then she looked up and saw the most beautiful woman slowly descending down the stairs making her way to her. Wow, I didn't know she could get even prettier than what she already is..
Marissa slowly walks up to her and smiled at her lovingly.
"Wow!" Marissa said looking at Alex who's wearing a black slacks and a red sleeveless top with a plunging neckline.
"You look gorgeous!" Marissa said eyeing Alex up and down as the blonde just continued gawking at her.
Alex just gazed at her taking in her beauty.
"Alex, are you just gonna stare at me?" Marissa said smiling at her.
"Huh?!" Alex said snapping back to reality "I don't know what to say?! You got me speechless!"
"How about, Marissa you look beautiful?!" she said smiling at her widely.
"Marissa, beautiful would have been an understatement!" Alex said as she looked at Marissa wearing a white dress that hugged her perfectly curved body accentuating her breast.
"I don't think words can describe how you looked tonight?!" Alex said admiring her beauty and then staring at her again.
"So are we just gonna stare at each other all night?" Marissa said teasingly.
"Sorry?!" Alex said grabbing her hand "let's go!"
"Ok, let's go!" Marissa said intertwining her hands with hers as they walked thru the door.
"Wait?!" Marissa said stopping at her tracks "I forgot something?"
"What is it?" Alex said looking at her stopping as well.
"This!" Marissa said then she kissed Alex passionately.
After 5 minutes of kissing……
"I think we better go now before I forget where we're going?!" Alex said as she pulled away from the kiss.
"Ok!" Marissa said smiling "where are we going?"
"You'll see" Alex said smiling "but first you have to wear a blindfold."
"Is it really necessary?" Marissa asked.
"Yes! I want it to be a surprise!" Alex said as she puts the blindfold on Marissa's eyes.
"Ok?!" Marissa said nodding.
Somewhere in Newport.
"Are we there yet?" Marissa said impatiently.
"Yes, we're here!" Alex said as she parked her car and went over to Marissa's side to guide her to get out of the car.
"Can I take this off?" Marissa said as she holds the blindfold gesturing to take it off.
"Not yet!" she said quickly "just hold my hand and follow my lead!"
After they walked slowly and have entered the place.
"Let me take this off for you!" Alex said as she took the blind off of her.
"Where are we?" she said looking around adjusting her eyes and not clearly seeing because the lights are out.
"Look again?" Alex said then all the lights were turned on. She looked around and then it hit her.
"This is the place where we first saw each other!" Marissa said looking around and finding that there's no one there except the two of them "But there's no one here?"
"Yup! I rented the entire Delicacies just for the two of us!" Alex said smiling at her.
Marissa looked around and saw that the restaurant was filled with roses and petals scattered around the floor.
"Oh my God!" Marissa said as she saw the flowers filling the room and was even more shocked when she noticed that the flowers are arranged to form a message on the wall.
--TO THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN I HAVE EVER SEEN!--
"That's the message you told me when you sent me dozens of roses that filled our entire living room before?!" Marissa said surprised at Alex, her eyes filled with happiness.
"Thank you!" she said hugging and kissing Alex.
"No?" Alex said as she pulls away from her "THANK YOU!"
Marissa just looked at her lovingly as Alex stared at her filled with joy in her eyes.
"So are we the only two people here?" Marissa asked as they stop their intense staring.
"Actually, no….there's a waiter and a chef here to cater to us!" Alex replied.
"So shall we?" Alex said pulling a chair for her.
"Thank you" Marissa said sitting down.
"You're welcome!" Alex pulled a chair across from her and sat as well.
The two are now waiting for their dinner to be served while they were talking.
"I remember the first time I saw you in here" Alex said smiling about it "you were walking right out of that front door" Marissa just smiled at her as Alex points at the front door.
"Right there and then I knew I had to meet you!" Alex said looking thru her eyes.
"I remembered you sitting across that table" Alex said pointing across "I sent you a bottle of wine but you turned it down."
"I remembered!" Marissa said laughing "I didn't accept it because I didn't know who you were!"
"That's why I approached your table and introduced myself to you!" Alex said smiling.
"Then out of the blue you asked me out!" Marissa exclaimed.
"Yeah, but then you turned me down again" Alex said sadly.
"Because I have a boyfriend back then" Marissa said honestly "and you're too cocky!"
"I am not?!" Alex said defensively.
"Yes you are!" Marissa said nodding and teasing her.
"I'm not gonna win, am I?" Alex said half smiling.
"No" Marissa shook her head then smiled.
"Do you know that you're the very first person to turn me down?" Alex said truthfully.
"Really? I didn't know that?" Marissa said shocked.
"Lucky for you I don't take rejection that easily!" Alex said smugly.
"Is that why you came to the party?" She asked.
"Actually, you have Summer to thank that for!" Alex answered as she reaches for her hand and caressed it "she called me then asked me to be your date!"
"Really?" Marissa said holding onto her hand.
"I'm in L.A. that night and I went back here as soon as I can!" Alex said honestly.
"oh?!" Marissa said.
"You should have seen Jodie's face when I told her I have to go and be with you!" Alex said smiling.
"Who's Jodie?" Marissa said curiously.
"Remember the girl I was with when I saw you?" Alex explained "that's her!"
"Yeah, I remember!" Marissa said "She's pretty!"
"Yes she is! Should I be worried?" Alex said raising a brow at her.
"No! Of course not!" Marissa said quickly "I only have eyes for you!"
"Good!" she leans in then gave her a chaste kiss on the lips as the other girl smiled at her.
The two continued on talking as they ate their dinner, the two are now eating the dessert when Alex stands up and walks towards her.
"Do you want to dance?" Alex reaches for Marissa's hand and waited for her answer.
"Uhm… there's no music?" Marissa said looking at her confused.
Alex just smiled at her then said "There will be!"
All of a sudden she heard a music playing on the background, there was a band playing on the stage just for them.
"How did you …" Marissa said as she stands up and Alex led her to dance.
"That's the advantage of being rich and having connections" she said as they danced slowly and closely to each other.
Do you know where your heart is?
Do you think you can find it?
Or did you trade it for something
Somewhere better just to have it?
Do you know where your love is?
Do you think that you lost it?
You felt it so strong, but
Nothing's turned out how you wanted
Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold
I can't believe this is happening to me? She's so sweet! I'm so lucky to have her! Marissa thought while they were dancing.
Alex puts her hand on Marissa's lower back as they swayed back and forth to the beat of the music. While Marissa's hand is placed on Alex's hip and the other hand on her neck. Alex began to kiss Marissa on her neck so the brunette titled her head to the side to give Alex more access.
Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold
Well, all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head
Do you know what your fate is?
And are you trying to shake it?
You're doing your best and
Your best look
You're praying that you make it
I can't believe I'm doing this? Since when did I become sappy? Jodie's gonna laugh at me if she knew this! Well, I don't care! Marissa is so worth all this and a lot more! Alex said to herself holding Marissa closer to her and gave Marissa kisses on her neck and her face.
Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold
Well, all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head
I said all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Better than you had it
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Yeah, better than you had it (Better than you had it)
The two just stood there dancing and very much preoccupied at each other. They both felt like they were floating in the air because of happiness that they were experiencing just by dancing. As the song ended, the two just looked into each other's eyes filled with love and happiness.
"Alex I think we should sit down now" Marissa said stopping and gesturing for them to sit down.
"Wait, there's more!" Alex said still not moving from where she stands.
Marissa looked at her confused then she saw another band playing at the stage.
"Whoa!" Marissa said as she looked at the stage where the band was playing.
"I know you liked them" Alex said as they dance again to the song.
What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
The two were dancing as Marissa let her lips come crashing down on Alex, as they made contact they both moaned in excitement, they had both been craving each other since they arrived at the restaurant. Alex tentatively responded to Marissa's delicate lips upon touching hers. The two had yet to say how they truly felt about each other, but every thing that words could describe was being spoken through the soft passionate kiss the two were sharing.
After a long time of exploring each others' lips, Marissa's knees were weakening from the taste Alex was leaving on her tongue. They both felt something that can't be explained.
There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
The song ended and Marissa couldn't be any happier and so is Alex.
The two sat down again on their table smiling at each other.
"I can't believe you got Onerepublic and Lifehouse to play for us?!" Marissa said overwhelmed.
"Anything for you!" Alex said smiling at her and reaches for her hand.
"So do you want to go to the beach?" Alex asked as she squeezed her hand softly.
"Yeah!" Marissa said excitedly.
"Let's go!" Alex said standing up and led Marissa out of the restaurant.
Newport Beach.
Marissa and Alex walked hand in hand as they sat down on the beach.
Alex sits down on the sand then Marissa sits in between her legs then she leaned her back against the blonde while Alex hugged her tightly.
"Alex, thank you for the wonderful date!!" Marissa said blissfully happy "I really had a great time with you!"
"That's good to hear!" Alex said softly as she embraced Marissa tenderly.
"Considering I spent a lot on this date!" Alex said smugly.
Marissa quickly turned around to face Alex then gave her a knowing look.
"I'm joking!!" Alex said grinning at her "I really love it when you're looking like that!"
"Like what?" Marissa asked still looking at the blonde confused.
"You're very beautiful when you're angry!!" Alex said smiling "it's really a total turn on to me!!"
"Wait till I throw something at you!!" Marissa said teasingly.
"Ok… I can take a hint!!" Alex said laughing at her.
"Seriously though.." Alex said staring intently at the brunette's face "you really are beautiful!!" She touched her face and admired the beauty in front of her.
"Really? I bet you told every girl you've been with the same thing?!" Marissa said jokingly "That they're beautiful…..hot…sexy…"
"Of course not!!" Alex said quickly as Marissa raised a brow at her.
"ok, maybe I did tell them that but I really meant it when I said that to you!!" Alex said truthfully "there's just something about you...I can't explain."
"Tell me.." Marissa said curiously "what is it with me that you don't see on other girls?"
"That's a tough question!" Alex paused for a while then looks at Marissa again "Honestly, I don't know?" Alex said "it's like I'm drawn to you….like I'm addicted to you!!"
"Addicted ?!" Marissa repeated as she looked at her confused while Alex nodded at her.
"I've been with dozens of girls before but nothing can compare to you!!" Alex said truthfully as she looked at Marissa seriously.
"Wait….is that true?" Marissa said surprised moving away a bit from her.
"That's true!!" Alex said nodding.
"That you've been with dozens of girls??" Marissa said with a hint of jealousy on her voice.
"uhm, no that part……was not true?!" Alex said shaking her head "that came out wrong…..let me rephrase it…"
"Dozens??" Marissa said the word dozens of girls repeating inside her head, not liking the idea at all so she stands up quickly and face Alex.
"So uhm…. Would you…" Alex said changing the subject knowing that Marissa is pissed at her but she cuts her off.
"Tell me…" Marissa said seriously as she started to feel the jealousy eating her up inside "how many girls have you been with before me??"
"I have lost count …" Alex said not looking at Marissa.
"That many ??" Marissa said with a hurt look.
Marissa can count in her fingers all the guys that she had dated before but to say the words – I have lost count - is a different story. It just means that she had been with more than a dozen of girls and the thought of it just pissed her off.
I knew Alex have been with girls before but to hear her say "I've been with dozens of girls before" that's something I don't think I can comprehend! Marissa thought to herself as she looked at Alex.
"No… that's not what I meant….." Alex said standing up and walking towards her.
"You didn't answer my question?" Marissa said backing away from her.
"Do I have to?" Alex exclaimed. oh not again
"You have to….I wanna know!" She said as she looked at the blonde for an answer.
"It's all in the past and it's not important anymore." Alex said inching closer to her.
"Well, I want to know?!" Marissa said adamantly.
"You think I will tell you?" Alex said as she looked at Marissa who obviously wants to know the answer.
"I'm your girlfriend!"Marissa said frustration evident on her voice "I have the right to know!"
"Let me ask you this.." Alex said looking at her "Did I ever ask you about your past relationships?"
Marissa just looked at her.
"No!" Alex answered her question without waiting for Marissa's reply "So just give it a rest!"
"You said it yourself…it's all in the past!" Marissa said persistently "so what's wrong if I want to know about your past?"
"Didn't you hear what I just said?" Alex said getting irritated at her "Why are you biting my head off?"
"Because you're keeping it a secret from me!" Marissa exclaimed.
"That's why it's called a past!! there's no need to bring it out again! " Alex said not wanting to talk about it.
"Is there something in the past that you don't want me to know?" Marissa said sadly looking at her.
"Marissa, I really don't want to talk about this right now!" Alex said as she walked over to her and held her hand.
Marissa just stared at her blankly then said "I want to go home" in a distant manner.
Alex took this as a bad sign and let goes of Marissa's hand.
"Ok?! I guess, I better get you home then" Alex said not really wanting to go.
"Yeah……It's really getting late you know" Marissa said softly as Alex looked sadly at her.
"Ok?!" Alex said distantly as they walked slowly away from the beach and back to the car.
Alex and Marissa are now inside the car not talking to each other.
Alex wanted to talk to Marissa but she chose not to because she didn't know what she could say to her to make it all better.
Marissa on the other hand wanted to cry but she chose not to because she knows crying won't do her any good.
The ride back home was very long and very quite neither one of them said a thing after they left the beach. They were both very preoccupied about what happened earlier to even talk.
Should I tell her? Does she really have to know about this? Am I being hard on her? I don't know what to say to her Alex thought while she was driving.
Why won't she tell me? She doesn't trust me…..is that it? Is it really wrong to know more about her past? Marissa on the other hand thought to herself.
I should have known these kinds of things will come up eventually. This is the reason why I don't want to be in a relationship..
But Marissa is different from all the other girls I have been with. I should trust her but I'm not ready to open up to her…Alex thought to herself then glanced at Marissa who is still not looking at her.
What's in the past that she didn't want me to know?? Or should I say who's in the past that she didn't want me to know?? What's there to hide? It's really not a big deal to me…ok it is a big deal to me……
if she told me the truth we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place….I would understand..instead she kept it a secret from me..
And the way that she reacted……it's like I hit a nerve or something!! Marissa thought to herself again.
"We're here" Alex said softly stopping at the driveway as Marissa looked at her sadly.
"Bye" Marissa said grumpily then kissed her lightly on the cheeks and quickly steps out of the car.
"Wait!" Alex said as she steps out of the car too.
Marissa stopped from walking and looks at Alex while Alex stared at her and took a deep breath.
"Hey, I'm sorry" she said apologetically as she looks at Marissa regretfully.
"I couldn't leave it like that?!" she said "I don't want you to be mad at me!"
Marissa looked at her with a sad face then Alex cupped her face with her hand.
"I'm really sorry about earlier" Alex said seriously "This night is supposed to be fun…But I've ruined it!!"
"I know that you want to know about my past" Alex said honestly holding her hands "When I'm ready, I promise I'm going to tell you."
"But as of now…" Alex paused then looked at her closely "I don't think it's a good idea to talk about it…I'm just not ready."
Marissa nodded as she looked at her sadly "I'm sorry for pushing you….I know you'll tell me when you're ready." She said understandingly.
"Of course!" Alex said smiling at her then kissed her softly on the lips "I will tell you...in time!"
"So we're cool?!" Alex asked squeezing her hands softly "You're not mad at me anymore?"
"Yeah! We're cool" Marissa said smiling at her.
"You know I can't stay mad at you forever!!" Marissa said then kissed her gently.
"I know." Alex said smiling at her "that's why I lo….like you so much!"
Oh my God!! Did she almost slip on telling me that she loves me? Did I hear her right?
She loves me! Alex loves me!! Yeah!!
Whoa……slow down girl..she didn't exactly told you that she loves you..but that's what she almost said!!
No..you just assumed that that's what she's trying to say!! She said like..not love..that's two different words there
oh yeah..that's right..besides..Do you really think Alex will love you that instantly??
YES, because I already love …
"Marissa?!" Alex said looking at her worried "are you ok?"
"uhm, yeah? I'm ok!" Marissa said snapping out of her daze.
"I thought I lost you there?" Alex said looking at her intently.
"I'll see you tomorrow?" Alex said smiling at her as she leans in to kiss her.
"Yeah, tomorrow!!" Marissa said then leans in to kiss her.
The kiss starts off slowly, the two just kissed lovingly as the passion between them grew stronger than ever. Marissa kissed Alex like she hasn't kissed her for a long time and Alex loved it.
Marissa slowly moved her kisses from Alex' lips across her jaw and down her neck. As Alex brought her up again, her other hand on Marissa's thigh caressing it, she then captured Marissa's lips and kissed it tenderly as she pulled her closer to her than before.
Both of the girl's eyes were clouded up with strong emotion, mostly of want and need. The two have been thinking the same thing about each other and are getting lost with the sensations they are both feeling right now.
Marissa began to move her kisses along Alex's exposed shoulder then back to her neck sucking it gently then back to her lips again. They continued kissing slowly and yet Alex could feel Marissa's passion growing as she felt Marissa's hands slide gently up under her top, the feel of Marissa's hands on her bare skin making her moan out of excitement.
Alex felt something building up again as they continued kissing each other. She moved her hands to Marissa's butt and pulled her closer to her, their bodies pressing each other as Marissa's left hand continued on roaming while the other kept on massaging her breast and yet again she moaned on the brunette's lips. Marissa's driving her crazy.
"Do…… you…… want to……Come up?" Marissa said in between kisses.
"uhm…" Alex said still breathing heavily and not thinking clearly while Marissa kissed her neck.
"Please?" Marissa said with pleading eyes then she continued kissing her neck again.
"Ok?!" she nodded but still uncertain if what she said was the right thing to do.
Marissa quickly grabbed her hand and led her to the house. The two entered the house discreetly not saying a word to each other until they reached Marissa's room.
As soon as Marissa closed the door, she felt Marissa's lips crashing down on hers, as Marissa kissed her eagerly again.
"Marissa…" Alex said but gets cut off by her as she made a shushing sound.
Alex' head was swarming with thoughts but as she felt Marissa's warm body this close to her she have forgotten all of it and just gave into temptations.
The two kissed hungrily as if there's no tomorrow. Alex pulled Marissa closer to her and kissed her eagerly, letting her own tongue snake out to find Marissa's. Marissa felt Alex' tongue and gladly accepted and massaged her tongue with hers.
Marissa started breathing heavier as the kiss intensified. Their bodies pressed against each other as their lips continued to explore one another. Marissa pushed Alex on to the bed, and then kissed her again. She was now lying on top of Alex straddling her. Marissa could feel Alex' hands running over her back as she pulls her closer to her. Both of them felt their hearts racing as their movements intensified.
Marissa began to softly kiss Alex' neck as the blonde held onto Marissa's waist, pulling her closer and kissing her warm skin passionately. Their bodies moved with each other rhythmically and they heard each other's deep breathing and moaning escaping from their lips.
Marissa pulled away for a second to look at Alex' blue eyes. She found herself once again basking in the blonde's striking beauty. Beneath her lay the most beautiful woman she had ever seen and she knew she was the luckiest girl for having Alex and knowing that she was hers was the most important thing for her.
Marissa leans up and slowly pulls Alex' top off of her, as Alex unzips the dress that Marissa was wearing. Marissa squirms to get it off, not breaking the kiss she was having with Alex.
Alex reaches for the clasp of Marissa's bra, and pulls it off of her, she moans as Alex begins sucking her neck and caressing her breast with her hand. Marissa grinds into Alex' body, moaning.
Alex flipped over so she was now lying on top of Marissa, then she leant down to slightly kiss her breast while she massaged the other breast with her hand. She felt Alex placing light kisses at her breast but never really touching her nipple.
"Alex...please.." Marissa said softly almost pleading to the blonde to take her.
Alex decided to give in and took the nipple into her mouth, playfully running her tongue over it. Marissa felt her nipple erect immediately by the sudden contact of the blonde's lips on her breast. Marissa let out a loud moan, followed by a high scream when she felt Alex carefully biting down her nipple.
Alex turned her head away and begins kissing Marissa's body, and drags her tongue from her neck to her belly button, causing Marissa to elicit a whimper again.
Marissa now only in her underwear, whereas Alex still is wearing her bra and her pants, she is still straddling Marissa, sitting up on top of her.
Marissa raises her body up and captures Alex' lips once again, as they kissed deeply and passionately. Marissa runs her tongue over Alex' lips, causing Alex to moan. Alex pulled away and moved back down to once again kiss and suck her neck. She let her hands travel from Marissa's belly, to her hips and to her thighs.
Alex is lying on top of her and then she placed her knee in between Marissa's legs. She puts pressure on Marissa, as she moans heavily with the sensation she was feeling.
Alex leant in again for another kiss, tenderly nipping at the brunette's bottom lip before fully covering her lips with her own and sliding her tongue inside Marissa's mouth as her left hand softly caressing her breast.
Alex moved down again to where her hand was and took it into her mouth. She playfully licked Marissa's breast and then started to suck hard on it. Causing Marissa to let out a load groan and arched up a bit, pushing herself deeper into Alex' mouth.
Alex then moved her mouth to the other breast and started licking the nipple before gently biting it, holding it in between her teeth. Marissa moaned again as she felt the blonde's teeth on her nipple. Marissa placed her hand behind Alex' head and pulled her closer.
Alex moved back up again to cover her lips with her own and kissed Marissa again with passion as her tongue made its way into Marissa's mouth battling each other.
They were kissing heavily when Alex started to pull away from her. Alex looks into her eyes, Marissa's eyes closed briefly as a wave of pleasure ran through her body. As soon as she noticed Alex stopping on her tracks, she opened her eyes and look at the blonde's face.
"Why'd you stop?" Marissa said looking at her confused.
"Marissa.." Alex said softly to her "I don't think we should do this…" She said slowly standing up.
Marissa looked at her surprised "Are you serious?" she said disappointed as she sat up on the bed while Alex walked to where her clothes are.
"Yes" Alex said not looking at her as she picks up her top and wears it again. NO, fuck I don't know
"Why?" Marissa said her voice cracking "Is it me?"
"No!" Alex said glancing back at her. it's me
"Am I not good enough for you?" she said with a hurt look.
"That's not it!" Alex exclaimed as Marissa just looked at her confused.
"It's not you….it's me!" Alex said avoiding eye contact with her.
"Don't give me that it's not you..it's me crap!" Marissa said angrily.
"Tell me, what's wrong?" Marissa said demandingly.
"I just don't want you to regret this in the morning!" Alex said not looking at her.
"I started this…" Marissa exclaimed "why'd you think I will regret this?"
Alex stood there not saying a word; she just trailed off finding a wall that is going to be easier to look at than the disappointment of her girlfriend.
"Are you just gonna stand there?" Marissa said irritatingly then continued "Maybe it's the other way around?" She hissed then rolls off the bed wrapping the sheets around her body.
"That's not true!" Alex said looking at her as her voice rose up a few notches too "And you know it!"
"Then why do I feel like you're rejecting me" She said controlling her tears to fall down on her face.
"I'm not rejecting you!" Alex said walking to her and holding her waist "I want to do this with you but don't you think it's too soon?"
"Alex, I'm ready to do this!" Marissa said softly "I don't care if it's too soon!"
"Marissa, I don't know how to explain this to you…" Alex said honestly "I know for a fact that if we had sex it will change everything?!"
"Nothings gonna change between us!!" Marissa said reassuring her.
"You don't know that!!" Alex said shaking her head.
"Alex, I ……" Marissa said but gets cut off by her.
"Marissa just trust me on this…" Alex said knowingly "I know what I'm doing is the best for the both of us."
Marissa just looked down at her sadly. right?
"I hope you understand?" Alex said then she pulled her for a hug "I'm sorry….."
"I can't believe you just turned me down?" Marissa exclaimed as Alex holds her tightly.
"I didn't?" Alex replied "I just wanted us to wait!"
Marissa just stood there not saying a word as Alex pulled away from her.
"I think it's better for me to go now!" Alex said walking away from her as Marissa frowned because of this.
"Why don't you stay here with me?" Marissa quickly said.
"uhmm.." Alex said a bit sceptical.
"We don't have to do anything!" Marissa said pleading "Please?! I just want to feel you beside me! I don't want to sleep alone tonight?!"
"uhm, Alright?!" Alex said walking back to her as they both lied down to bed.
Marissa and Alex were now lying in bed together, holding each other as Marissa felt Alex' body snaked over hers. Marissa looked at her girlfriend, who was lying on her side with her arm and one leg around her while Marissa's head was resting on Alex' chest. Marissa soon drifted off to sleep, not realizing Alex who's still awake and just stared blankly at the ceiling thinking to herself.
I want her!! I really do!! So what's stopping me now?
She's always the one pulling away before because she's not ready and now that she's ready...I'm not??
Is she right when she told me that maybe it's the other way around?? No, I'm just confused...Alex thought to herself and soon drifted off to sleep.