Alright, folks. First chapter of the year. I hope that everyone's New Year's party was good and safe. We have a handful of chapters left for Act I, and then after that we delve headfirst into Act II. I can't say much about it aside from that it will be longer than Act I.

Warnings: none.

[~]

They're not really expecting me
But I know where they hide the key, under the welcome mat
There's no better place than that
Don't know how long I've been gone
All I know is it's been too long and I'm off track

That's why I'm coming back
When I see the lights of my hometown
I feel like the world stops spinning 'round
Everything makes sense
Maybe it's the innocence
I know it's just a few miles down the road
I'm getting there as fast as I can go
I can always find peace of mind
In the lights of my hometown

~ "Lights of My Hometown," Aaron Lines

[~]

Chapter XXI: Whenever You're Ready

"See ya, Jack. Take care."

"You too. Drive home safe, okay?"

Jack walked carefully through the dark, empty house until he found a light switch. The hallway lit up just enough for him to get around without the threat of tripping over anything.

Even though she was his only ride home, it still was really nice of Sierra to drop him off. She was definitely one of the sweetest people he knew, hands down. Her friends were really cool, too—who knew that she was acquainted with so many interesting people? Being popular did indeed have its perks.

Mom was working late again, dinner was in the fridge, don't stay up too late—it was the usual drill that he had long since gotten used to. He heated up some of the casserole, dug in and finished it off within a few minutes. And now, to get some well-earned rest.

He tossed off his shirt and fell rearward onto his bed, fiddling with his phone one last time before dozing off. The group text messages that were sent over the course of a few days between him, Sierra and a few others were nothing short of comedy gold. Comment after comment of his new friends discussing what they called two and a half hours of sensory torture. They said that it was "an assault on your ears, your eyes, your brain…everything, man. Don't give this hack your money or your time. Don't make our mistake."

Point taken. He saved himself ten dollars, too. That reminded him—there was a great picture he took of Sierra in the Rise n' Shine. She looked so nice he just couldn't help himself. Luckily she didn't mind at all; she was quite flattered, even.

He went through the gallery with a large grin. This one at the park where he played a basketball game (his team lost, but it wasn't that big of a deal), this one at the ice cream place eating a Mega Sundae, this one taken accidentally of a fat little bird on a telephone pole. He admired each one, until he got somewhere he never thought he would again.

The next picture was one of Optimus waving awkwardly to the camera.

There was a comfort in seeing him, even in a photo. It was the last one he took before he left. He could have shut the phone off then and gone to sleep, but it was too late for that now. Throwing away any hesitation Jack pressed the key and scrolled through the rest.

Most of them were his, including this well timed shot of…Arcee…fiddling around with what looked like a console, but there were a few that weren't. Miko took that one of Bulkhead and Wheeljack arm in arm…and that one of Raf trying to teach Bumblebee how to handle the controller of his toy car...and this one of herself smiling widely.

They all had such good times together until Starscream had to take away a precious friend.

The nostalgia was damn near close to drowning him. How long had it been since he'd last seen them? If memory served him right then it was over a month. So why did it feel like an eternity?

It wasn't right that they'd been neglected for this long. Regardless of his decision he felt that he'd done a great disservice to them all.

Inviting Miko and Raf over was a really good idea. Tomorrow, then.

[~]

"Wow, Jack. Just…wow." Raf dabbed his mouth with the once pristine napkin. "Your mom makes the best meatloaf I've ever tasted."

"I'll say." From across the table Miko stuffed a large chunk of it in her mouth, chewing through her words. "What does she put in this? It's great."

He shrugged, "onions and ketchup—really simple stuff. Glad you like it, though. I'll tell her when she gets home from work."

She nodded quickly and dug into the soft mounds of her mashed potatoes. They were all quiet for a bit as they ate, and somehow as they started talking again the subject of Father's Day came up. Jack shifted in his seat and asked, "So what are you guys gonna do?"

Miko said, "We're going out to dinner. Mary offered to cook but he wouldn't let her. I say let her cook if she wants to—she makes the best stuff, anyway. But! I'm saving something good for James. He doesn't know it yet, but I finally saved up enough money to get him a deluxe CD of his that bad he likes. You ever heard of The Crush? They're not that bad."

"That's a nice thing to do. What about you, Raf? Any idea for something to give your dad?"

Here he stared at his half-empty red cup , almost at a loss, "I was going to give my dad a Father's Day present, but, uhm, I kind of decided not to."

"How come?

"It's just…" he paused, trying to find the right words. "I don't hate him. But I don't love him either. I'm not even sure I like him, actually. I think we had three or four full conversations this year alone. I know he's my dad, but I don't feel anything for him."

Something in Raf's words stung Jack more than they should have. There wasn't even a smidgen of maliciousness in his young friend's voice, just this defeat and resignation. Jack wondered if he would've felt the same if his own father stuck around.

"It's okay, though. He probably won't even notice," Raf scooped up a small portion of the potatoes and calmly ate them. "But I'm still making a gift; it just won't be for him."

"Who is it for? An uncle or something?" Jack hoped with all his might that there was some man in the boy's life that gave a damn about him.

Raf smiled. "Nope. It's for Optimus. He's the dad all dads should aspire to be. He listens when you talk, you know? I feel like I could tell him anything. When I visited Arcee's grave a couple days ago I just cried until I couldn't anymore, and even after I cleaned myself up he still noticed and asked me if there was anything he could do to help. I almost stared crying again, he was just so nice."

"Grave?" he repeated. "She has a grave?"

"Uh huh. You know how Cliffjumper has that big pile of rocks on top of the base? Well, right next to it they made one for Arcee."

The growing lump in his throat made it difficult to swallow his lemonade. He powered through it. "It's good that she has some sort of resting place, even if she's not in it. How is everyone else? Doing good?"

Miko leaned forward excitedly as she talked, "Oh, yeah! We're doing better than just good! You should have seen Bulkhead nailing every 'Con he could see just to get what was left of this energon supply in the Amazon." she curled her fist back and punched an imaginary Vehicon the same way her companion would have. "It was beautiful! You should have been there!"

"You didn't record it on your phone?" Jack said teasingly. "Usually when any fighting goes down you're the first one to be getting exclusive content."

Her joyful expression fell. "I couldn't reach it in time. I looked away for a second and suddenly the cool stuff was over." Then, suddenly, she perked up. "Buuut! I did snap a picture of the aftermath. Wanna see?"

Before he could even answer her phone was in her hands. After finding what she was looking for, Miko thrust the image into his line of sight. "Check this out!"

In perfect clarity was a large pile of Vehicons in various states of dismemberment. He could only imagine the smackdown that had ensued. "That looked like one really bad day for the Decepticons."

She laughed in triumph. "And it was one great day for the Autobots!"

The rest of their time together was spent happily eating the homemade pecan pie and playing an old fashioned board game. Heaven knows how long it was stored away until now, but it finally was put to good use.

Raf's phone went off halfway through round five of Soup to Nuts. They paused long enough for him to read the text. "Hey, Miko. Get ready soon, okay? Bee's stopping by to pick us up in a few minutes."

It was if all the joy in her was sucked out. It was as obvious as the day was long: she didn't want to leave.

I don't want you to leave, either.

But he didn't think about their eventual departure; instead he threw himself into making sure everyone. Besides, it's not like they're never going to see each other again. He'd find the time before school started.

It came too damn soon when they had to leave. Another text and a quick journey to the front stoop and pulled over near the driveway was another old face.

"You wanna go over and say hi?" Raf pointed to the patiently waiting Camaro. "I'm sure he'd love to see you again."

Jack said, "You don't need to ask me twice. Just lead the way."

Bumblebee looked just as amazing as he remembered, possibly even more. "Woah, you're looking good. Did you get a new paintjob or something?"

There was a long string of thrilled beeps, and with the same amount of enthusiasm he asked, "What did he say?"

Raf translated, "he said that he just got buffed earlier today and he thanks you for noticing. He…says you look good, too."

Jack stroked Bumblebee's hood affectionately. "Hey, thanks, buddy."

The doors unlocked and the twosome got in—Raf in the front seat and Miko in the back. She rolled down the window and craned her head out.

"Can we do this again soon?" She said it like an overeager child, her eyes almost pleading with him.

"Of course we can. Whenever you're up to it—maybe later in the week or something?" He just couldn't miss another opportunity.

"Done and done. And don't be afraid of stopping by the base once in a while."

They bid one another a final goodnight before Bumblebee rolled off out of the complex to drop off his precious cargo.

As the sound of the engine faded into the distance a sucking void began to creep in. The walk back to the front door was simple but lonesome, and the house itself was just too quiet for his tastes.

Jack slubbered through the remainder of the cleanup, his mind tossing and turning with so many emotions that it made his head swim. It was late, he was tired, and right now he was close to crying.

Maybe getting some sleep would help.

…

Nope. Sleep wasn't helping either.

[~]

The next four days saw him in a state of unparalleled restlessness and a metric ton of self-reflection. Almost every waking moment was seeped in a tug-of-war between normal life and extraordinary life. He weighed the pros and cons of each in his head.

I'm better off not going back; there's just too much going on. But it feels so wrong that I'm not there. I can go to school, hang out with friends and not worry about being killed, that's nice. But I've handled so much, and I'm really not alone when I mourn.

And just to make everything worse, Sierra called—she wanted to know if he was free to hang out at her place for movies. He had to lie through his teeth about not feeling too good that day. She understood and told him to get better.

I nearly lost my mind when Arcee was killed; I don't know if I could handle it again. But I could talk to Optimus or Ratchet, just like Miko said. I could always just go over and not get involved; make it easy for me. But that would be such a cop-out and a cheat for everyone who is risking their lives. 'Oh, hey, the Decepticons are blowing up downtown Las Vegas—that's my cue to leave.'

This sucks so much…what am I gonna do?

Arcee wouldn't want me to be miserable.

Like a lightning bolt through the dark her image flashed in his mind, clearer than ever before. She could take on anything, fight through anything, do anything. Nothing held her back and she refused to let anything limit her.

If there was anyone to emulate…

He reached the decision of a lifetime. After throwing on some clothes and taking his cell phone, he went off to look for his mom.

She was there at the kitchen table, scissors in hand as she clipped coupons with military precision. He waited for a lull in her concentration before he said anything. "Hey, Mom? Do you need the car today?"

Looking up from the small mountain she made and furrowing her brow, she said, "No, not today. Where are you going? Somewhere nice with your new friends?"

"Nah, I'm just—I need to head out and clear my head. I'll be home by dinner." He opened the door to the garage as quickly as he could.

"Jackson Darby. Where are you going? " Oh, boy. With that tone it was clear she wanted the real answer.

Better just be honest about it. Lying never ended well. "I'm going to the Autobot base. Not to stop over, not to say hi—I'm rejoining the team."

His mother stopped immediately. The scissors were left forgotten on the table as she stood up to face him. "Jack, wait. Don't go because you feel like you're obligated to. Did they hound you about it at all? You can tell me if they did."

"No, Mom. They didn't hound me. This is something that I really, really have to do." There was a neediness in his own voice that surprised even himself. "I need to be with them again, Mom. I've made up my mind about it, and nothing's going to change it."

She appeared confused by that. "What about Sierra and the rest of your friends? I thought you were enjoying yourself with them."

"Because I am. But at the same time, I want to be with the Autobots. I'm not going to ditch anyone. I can live in both worlds, Mom. I can do it. What's stopping me anyway?"

Her arms folded in front of her chest as she stared at him, biting her lower lip in thought.

"I'm gonna be honest, I was more than just a bit relieved when you told me that you quit hanging out with them. It meant I didn't have to worry about you getting killed or kidnapped, or worse. But if you're so adamant about it…I guess I can be a bit lenient and let you go. The keys are in their usual place, honey. Drive safe. Text me when you get there." She kissed him right on the nose and returned to her clipping. He ran to the car and didn't wince when the seat burned his legs. Jack turned the key to the car and backed out of the driveway slowly.

Let's see if I can remember the directions as well as I used to.

The drive went fine enough; he only missed one turn that could be easily corrected. He hoped that he would catch them at a good time.

With every second and every inch the base drew nearer and nearer. His stomach was tied in an excitable knot as the doors opened. A wave of relief and Jack parked the car, got out, and looked around at this lovingly familiar place. All four bots and two humans stared at him as if they couldn't believe their eyes.

He didn't even know what to say. There wasn't a sentence in the world that could articulate just how happy and grateful he was to just be here.

Bulkhead let out a booming laugh. "Look who came back!"

"Indeed he has," Ratchet noted. "And it looks he's no worse for wear, thankfully."

You'd be surprised about that.

"Jack?" Miko leapt from the couch and seemed to fly down several levels just to greet him. Poor Raf could barely keep up.

"I knew you'd stop by!" She could barely restrain herself from just how thrilled she was. "I told everyone you would. Wanna watch Monstercat vs. Hydra-shark? It's a two part special. Or maybe you're up for something else. Raf's brought over this cool game that has up to four players."

"I'm sure I have a third controller somewhere. I mean, if you want to play." The boy's smile could not have been any wider.

"Hey, we can do anything you want. But before we get to any virtual butt-kicking, I just want to say something real quick."

He was just a breath away; no more stalling. "This isn't just a brief visit. I'm planning on becoming a full time member of Team Prime again."

In that instant everything changed and we back to the way things were. It was nothing short of wonderful.

Optimus stepped forward, and in a clear, and in that warm voice he said, "I assume you've given this considerable thought."

"Yeah, I did. It wasn't easy, I'll tell you that," he ran his fingers through his black hair, "but then I realized that I could handle anything that life could throw at me. If Arcee could work through her tragedies, why should I be different?"

Miko's eyes widened. A split second later her arms were thrown tightly around him. Raf managed to squeeze in there and hold onto him for dear life.

He thought he'd be smothered by the sheer force of their hugs, and at that moment, it didn't seem like such a bad thing.

[~]

Her empty grave was just about the same height as Cliffjumper's; something she would have definitely approved of. Jack approached it, heart practically beating out of his chest.

"Hey, Arcee. I've missed you something terrible." he let the palm of his hand touch one smooth rock. "You probably already know this, but I took a bit of a break from saving the world with the Autobots. Everything was just closing in on me so much and I couldn't deal with it. It sucks, but it was something that I had to do. I hope you don't hold it against me."

He sat down, his back relaxed against the surface of the stones. "I made some new friends while I was away. You already know about Sierra—I've been hanging out with her and her friends for a while, and they're really cool. Sure, they don't help fight Decepticons, but I got to meet people who travel the world on vacation and are on their way to Harvard. Can you believe it?

"And now you're probably wondering why I came back. I had it made, right?... truth is, I missed everyone. Everyone and everything. I want to be a part of the team again. I can balance being normal and saving the world no problem."

He went silent as he closed his eyes. Just sitting here was enough for him to keep going. It was…closure, in its own way. And he was glad for it.

"I'm always gonna miss you, Arcee. I'm gonna miss your voice, your smile, the way you went to zero to sixty in three-point-five seconds," he chuckled at his own quip. "I survived this long without you, so I think I have a chance with, you know, moving on. I won't forget you. Promise."

Jack steadied himself to his feet and cast one last look. "Wherever you are, Arcee, I hope you're at peace."