Hello there!

A very worrisome issue is addressed at the end of the chapter; I can only hope I am portraying it the best way I can and without meaning to cause anyone any harm or offense.

Thank you so much to everyone reading this, you make the inspiration in my keep flowing, please let me know what you think of this chapter once your finish reading.

Enjoy.

"And then something invisible snapped inside her, and that which had come together commenced to fall apart."

-John Green-

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Elena's eyes cracked open that morning to find a tray filled with food right next to her bed. She sighed as she stretched her arms over her head and breathed in the lovely smell of crispy bacon and scrambled eggs.

"I thought you may like to start the day early" The voice that spoke belonged to her mother and Elena's eyes immediately moved to the window seat to watch the older woman smiling at her.

Her brows furrowed as she scooted over to a seating position "Why?"

Miranda sighed sadly as she walked closer to her "I know we didn't react the way you wanted us last night Len" She stood at the foot of the bed for a couple of seconds before sitting down next to her "But you need to understand this is a lot to take in, your father—well you know how he gets whenever he remembers his mother"

Elena sucked in a breath and felt her eyes filling with tears "It's not my fault mom"

Miranda's face crumbled as she pulled her young daughter into her arms "Oh I know sweetheart" She whispered as she stroked her long hair the way she used to do when Elena was only a child "And it kills me you had to learn this on your own, you've been seeing a doctor I presume?"

"Yes"

They released each other and the older woman grabbed Elena by the shoulders, regret, and shame written all over her face "You shouldn't have to do this on your own" Her voice quivered as she looked into the troubled eyes of the daughter they had neglected for so long "I think we've been awful parents don't we?" Her voice was laced with sadness and Elena was unable to meet her eyes "Is this boy, Damon… is he helping you?"

Elena nodded "He was the one who convinced me to go see a doctor"

Miranda took a deep breath and forced a smile to paint itself in her lips "Then perhaps we have misjudged him" Her hand went to the young girl's cheek and rested there "I'm so sorry Elena, for everything" She told her "I promise you, I'll try to make things right this time"

Elena nodded, tears gathering at the corner of her eyes, ready to fall out in any minute, because for so long she had wanted to hear those words, to know that her family supported her and were going to be with her through it all "It's okay mom"

"No, it's not, I've neglected you too much," Miranda said with a shake of her head, her own eyes heavy with tears at the realization of her mistakes "I've been horrible. But I want to change things around a bit" She patted Elena's cheeks softly and forced another smile out of her lips "And we'll manage to talk with your father after the party"

"Party?"

"You forgot?" She asked with surprise "His annual soiree is today. You know, an excuse to try and gain more investors" She rolled her eyes and chuckled a bit as if the mere idea of the gathering was foolish.

"It had totally slipped my mind"

Miranda stood up and went to Elena's closet to retrieve a black garment bag "Well, you have a beautiful dress to wear and it would be a shame to put it to waste" She placed the dress on top of her dresser's chair "So, eat your breakfast and we'll get ready for it together"

Elena smiled at her mother in return. The idea of a party filled with her father's friends was the last thing Elena wanted or needed at the moment, but the proud and happy look on her mother's eyes was enough to make her want to go.

For the first time in so long, Elena was feeling a real connection to the woman who once had sat down with her on the porch to braid her hair and sing old country songs. She wanted to be that girl again, to be safe and blissfully happy one more time, so instead of dwelling on how much she didn't want to go to that party, she focused on the amazing surprise that had greeted her that morning.

"So, you made this?" She asked as she grabbed the tray on the nightstand and placed it on top of the bed, her mouth watering at the contents of it.

Miranda chuckled as she walked towards the door "Are you kidding me? I don't even know how to boil water! But I did instruct what it was to be made"

Elena smiled at her "That is enough for me mom"

Miranda stood at the entrance for a couple of seconds, watching her eat in silence; then she took a deep breath and walked out of the room "I love you so much darling" the words were so low that Elena wasn't able to hear them but that didn't make them any less true.

Once her breakfast was over, Elena hoped in the shower and took her time cleaning the grime of the night before. Whenever she closed her eyes she could still see images of Damon, Bonnie and that nightmare that went downhill in the Lake House.

Elena knew she was in the wrong, knew that she shouldn't have reacted the way she did but she couldn't help it, the rage had taken hold of her and had made her say all those awful things to them. She felt repulsed with herself, couldn't believe how she could be such an ungrateful bitch towards the only people who had cared for her.

The excitement and joy she had felt moments earlier when her mother woke her up with breakfast suddenly vanished and she was left with nothing but a big hole of emptiness in her chest.

With a sigh and feeling a lot less energetic than moments earlier, Elena toweled herself off and dressed with a pair of denim shorts and a white t-shirt.

As she exited the bathroom she released a high pitched scream because she found her brother sitting casually at the foot of her bed.

She threw herself at him and felt something easing in her chest when he wrapped his arms around her "I didn't know you were coming, you dumbass!"

He chuckled as he pulled away from her "You know I've always loved surprises"

"Silly boy" Elena took a hand to his cheek and squeezed it softly "How long you're staying?"

"A couple of days" He answered as he dropped himself back on her bed and stacked a pair of pillows behind him "Summer vacations are coming, are you ready for graduation?"

"Ugh don't tell me about it" Elena groaned and rested next to him "I am dreading college results; I still haven't gotten back the one I really want"

While she and all of her friends had gotten a few acceptance letters already none of them were of the colleges they expected, Elena wasn't worried about Damon or Caroline because she was sure they were getting in but she feared for herself because she wasn't sure she was good enough to achieve it.

Sensing her turmoil, Jeremy gave her a sympathetic look at the same time he bumped her should with his affectionately "You know those are the ones that take longer" When she didn't speak back or returned his gesture, he frowned and twisted his head to stare directly at her "What is wrong with you?"

Elena sighed. She hadn't told a word to her brother about her diagnosis or the fact that the world seemed to be crumbling around her, it wasn't that she and Jeremy weren't close enough, but lately she felt disconnected from him just like she did with anyone else around her.

"Nothing is" She answered instead of telling the truth, of telling him how she sometimes felt the world was closing in on her, how sometimes it was hard to get up from the bed and how often she felt like she couldn't breathe.

Jeremy reached to her hand and squeezed it softly "I know you, Len, there's something bothering you"

She gave him a tentative smile and squeezed his hand back "I got into a fight with Damon… and Caroline" She answered him, opting to tell at least part of the truth.

"Because …?"

She groaned and threw her head back against the headboard "Because I am a genuine bitch"

Elena couldn't help but cringe when she thought about what an absolute jerk she had been to her friends, she wished she could turn back the time and make things different, that way she could stop herself from hurting the two people who had supported her more than anyone.

Jeremy shook his head and wrapped one arm around her "Hey there, be careful with the tough love" He said as he pulled her into his body, where she went willingly "Wanna talk about it?"

"Honestly no" Her voice was a bare whisper as she allowed herself to be comforted by the safeness of her brother "I just want today to be over and start everything again tomorrow, a clean slate"

"I think that's a great idea" He kissed her forehead and injected his voice with cheerfulness, gone was the gloomy Jeremy that lurked around in the corners "But you know what's a greater one?"

"What?"

"You, me and lemon sodas"

At the words, Elena's memory took her to summer mornings playing in the grass while their mother prepared them a beverage with soda and lemon ice cream before joining them in the grass to play and indulge in their drinks. Days when happiness was at the tip of the fingers and bad things didn't exist in their world.

"Oh, I had forgotten all about them" Elena answered as the memory started fading from her mind.

Jeremy gave her an outraged look "How could you—never mind, we'll fix that right now" He squeezed her shoulder one last time before standing up from the bed swiftly and motioning for her to do the same.

Elena smiled at him before following suit and joining him at the door "I've really missed you Jer"

"I missed you too sister"

They rushed to the kitchen which at the time was swimming with waiters and chefs hired to make their parents' gathering a remarkable affair, but even in all the madness they were able to find a quiet corner to prepare their drinks and then escaped to enjoy them in the quietness of the upstairs terrace, just like the pair of children they once were.

Two hours into the party Elena already felt like she needed a drink and some time alone in her bedroom away from the prying eyes of her parents' friends. She and her mom had spent a good amount of time dolling themselves up and now she was clad in a flowy white dress that showed off her best assets and worked wonders with her cleavage.

She had received more than a couple of lecherous stares from some of her father colleagues, which had made her skin crawl and urged her to disappear around the corner for a little while if just to feel a bit less dirty than she did in front of all of them.

She entered her father's office with the sole propose of stealing one of his bottles of bourbon, the idea immediately brought Damon to her mind. He had called more than a couple of times of during the day but she had left every single one go to voicemail, she wanted to speak with him but still didn't know what to say, she was too ashamed because of what she had done.

With a sigh, she cracked open her father's liquor cabinet and pulled out one of his most expensive. She had every intention of sneaking to her room with the bottle in hand but a glimpse of something in her father's desk made her stop to take a peek.

Sweat broke down on her forehead as she placed the bottle on the hard mahogany surface and took hold of the colorful vouchers that covered it. Her eyes scanned the words over and over again as if somehow doing it again would make them disappear, transform them into something else but what she knew she was staring at.

A loud bang behind her made her drop the vouchers onto the floor

"What are you doing here?" Her father's voice was hard and angry behind her.

Elena turned around and with shaky movements pointed to the scattered papers that were now on the floor "Dad, what is this?"

Grayson shrugged nonchalantly, his arms were crossed over his chest as he leaned back against the door he had closed seconds earlier and looked at her with an unflinching stare "Something to see if you snap out of that stupid idea you have"

Elena felt her eyes filling with tears, but not with sadness but with despair, a feeling of inevitability that started consuming her and making her skin crawl. "What idea—dad that's not an idea, I have bipolar disorder"

"Well then I guess that's the perfect place for you"

Elena's eyes widened in fear, her mind taking her back to the visits she did to her grandmother when she was young. To the despair and sadness that filled the place she was in "You couldn't possibly be serious" She whispered, her voice breaking down at the end "This is… this a place like—where grandma was"

"Maybe that's what you need" Her father answered harshly at the same time he abandoned his post by the door and walked towards her "I won't have you here embarrassing me and jeopardizing everything I've managed to build"

"So you're just going to sweep me under the rug as you did with grandma?" She hissed, tears falling freely down her cheeks now "Let me die in there alone like you did her?"

Grayson's nostrils flared and his hand flew in the air as if to strike her but he lowered it at the last minute "You don't know what you're talking about" He spat, barely contained rage hanged from his every word "I am your father Elena, I know what is good for you" His eyes moved towards the vouchers on the floor for a second before they flew back to her "Take a good look, that's going to be your new home soon enough"

Elena shook her head "Mom will never let you"

His upper lip curled in a sinister smile before he turned around and started walking away "How naïve Elena. Your mother will do as I say like she always does"

Elena watched him open the door and stay still for a second before disappearing behind it. "Daddy…" She whispered before crumbling into the floor, the bottle of bourbon once again in her hands and she stared at her future scattered around the floor.

Elena was no minor, but she wasn't in her right mind either, with all the influence and power he yielded it wouldn't be a problem for her father to have her institutionalized. And it wouldn't be a good place, no; it would be a place like the one her grandmother died in, a place to lock away the parts of your life that embarrassed you only to never see them again.

She didn't know how long she remained there, the tears drying in her eyes and the booze in her throat. It could have been mere minutes but for Elena, it felt like hours. She took one last drag from the bottle and slinked away from the cold office towards her bedroom.

Her mind was spinning, her head was a jumbled mess of words and feelings she couldn't understand. She couldn't stop the noise or the pain that plagued her, she wanted to close her eyes and make everything disappear.

What was the point of it all anyway?

With trembling hands and shaking legs, she locked her bedroom door and headed towards the bathroom where she retrieved a pair of shaving blades. It couldn't be said that she was aware of what she was doing at the moment, her mind was clouded and the only thing she knew was that she wanted to make everything stop.

She couldn't do it anymore, she couldn't continue every day with that big hole of nothing in her chest, so she sat on the floor by her window and pulled out her phone.

Her actions were going to cause pain, she knew it well, but eventually, it would be for the best. They would be grateful once they realized how liberating it would be to get rid of her, to be free of the burden that was being related to her.

Her hands were shaking as she wrote the words on her phone, as she typed a last goodbye to the two people who had there been for her through it all, they would understand, they would move on and be happier without her.

Happy like she couldn't.

Maybe she would be happy now, would stop being afraid of everything and anything, she would finally get rid of the nothing that swallowed her whenever she closed her eyes.

She could be free.

It was more painful than she initially thought it would be, and it took more than just one try, she almost wished the bottle of bourbon was with her so she could relieve some of the pain.

Her arms were a mess of broken skin but once the blood started pouring freely out of her wrists she stopped feeling everything else, she became numb, like she had wanted all this time. Her head rested against the wall and tears streamed down her face as she looked down at the disaster she had created, the mess that would release them all of the suffering.

It was the right thing to do, everyone could move on without her and she could finally find peace. It was relieving, the thought of finally letting go. A look of peace took hold of her face as she closed her eyes and allowed the nothingness to swallow her whole one last time.