It's nagging at her, constantly. At first she scolds herself for reacting like that, but soon finds that she can't help herself. Jealousy is a weakness of character that she is not particularly proud of. While it can be healthy in small doses, Ziva is well aware of the fact that the doses hers comes in are not healthy at all, for any relationship.
Then she tries to reason with herself. After everything they went through recently, he wouldn't cheat on her. Not Tim, it would be completely out of character for him. Yet she can't help that voice in her head that insists she drove him away and now he is looking after other women when she's standing right next to him of all things. In all the relationships she has ever been in, even in the briefest of flings, this is a new low, one she never cared to reach. At least when her former lovers stared at other women they didn't feel the need to comment on their marvelous looks, too. They did it in silence and they could both pretend like it didn't happen. And it wasn't as if she never stared after other people.
But coming to think of it, ever since she started dating Tim, they never occurred to her, the thoughts she used to have. The flashes of someone else above her, another man's hand slipping under her shirt, strange lips claiming hers in heated kisses… from the first date she had with Tim, she never had the briefest of thoughts of sleeping with someone else. Even if she looked at someone else's ass it was not done with the wish to touch it but out of mere admiration and curiosity how they managed to keep it in shape like that.
After mentioning that word to Tony, she has to admit that she'd better confront Tim if they wanted to move past this. Might as well admit her weakness right then, to keep them from further embarrassing events.
She first has to decide when to broach the subject, and how to do it. "Do you want to have sex with Tony's ex?" doesn't sound like a good conversation starter, and while she isn't necessarily against open relationships, she is pretty sure that she wouldn't be able to tolerate the thought of Tim's hands on another woman's body. For her, that sort of sharing is only possible when she merely has a physical relationship with someone, something that is centered around having sex and getting physical pleasure and release and giving it. But when she opens herself up emotionally, when she allows herself to become vulnerable and trust the person she is with, she finds that she does not want anyone else getting anywhere close to that connection, not even on the physical side of it.
So, how does she bring up him calling Wendy cute? It turns out that she needn't have worried about that, because it's Tim who mentions that woman again.
"Wendy seemed nice." he casually mentions while they're out in the park to give Jethro his walk and she clenches her fist in the pocket of her jacket as she pulls her arm from his and takes a step to the side, separating their bodies as she suddenly finds herself unable to be so close to him. Tim gives her a somewhat puzzled look but is distracted by calling Jethro back from another dog.
"You have a real fascination with her." Ziva hears herself say and if they weren't in public she'd probably hit herself upside the head for that tone. When did she turn into the green eyed monster? Oh, right, the instant Tim used the words "Wendy" and "cute" in one sentence.
"Yeah, well, I didn't think she'd be Tony's type." Tim shrugs. "I mean, we know what he usually goes for, and she seems… different."
"Really?" she bites, her eyes widening when he fails to recognize the sarcasm in her tone.
"Well, she's far from 'mindless blond bimbo', don't you think?"
"I do not spend time pondering the former relationships of my colleagues." Ziva snaps at him, picking up the dog's ball and throwing it so Jethro can go chase it again. In her anger, she almost hits another couple out with their dog and then even Tim can't ignore the tension radiating off of her in waves any longer.
"Okay, what's wrong?" he asks her and Ziva whirls around, glaring at him. She opens her mouth to snap at him but then the words are gone and so is the anger and she just feels incredibly sad all of a sudden. So she shakes her head and takes a deep breath.
"Nothing." she tells him, petting Jethro when he returns to them to have an excuse not to look at her boyfriend.
"Ziva, come on. Something's wrong, you can-"
"I'd prefer not to have this conversation somewhere other people can hear, if you don't mind." she snaps at him, finding her patience running out quickly. If she has to get humiliated like that, she'd rather not have strangers witness it. She does have some pride left, after all. Tim sets his jaw and hooks the leash through Jethro's collar, tugging the dog along as he sets out to return to the car. Ziva stares after him before thrusting her hands into her pockets and stalking in the other direction, tears burning in her eyes. She can't be in a car with him right now, so she opts for walking back to his apartment. Which takes her almost an hour, giving her enough time to cool off and get somewhat of a grip.
"I was worried." Tim greets her when she lets herself in with the spare key. He's holding his phone and just then she can feel hers beginning to vibrate in her pocket but it stops when he hangs up. "Wanna tell me what's going on, or do I have to guess?" he asks when she doesn't take off her jacket, ready to leave at the answer of the question burning in her mind.
"Do you want to have sex with her?" she asks, feeling her heart starting to beat faster in her chest. Tim blinks at her.
"Have sex with whom?" Tim frowns, staring at her when she doesn't answer as she's too busy biting her lip to keep the tears from falling. "Wendy? You think I want to- Oh my God, Ziva, how-"
"You said she's cute!" she blurts and after a brief pause Tim starts laughing and she wants to smack him hard for that. It's bad enough that he stared at Wendy, that he commented on her looks in front of her, said he found another woman attractive while she, his girlfriend was right next to him, but now he's making fun of her, too, and that's just-
"I was trying to goat Tony." Tim tells her, sobering and taking a step towards her. Ziva blinks, furrowing her brows slightly. "Ziva, I said she's cute. Not attractive."
"You said I'm cute." she meekly offers as a protest when his hand comes to rest on her cheek and he shakes his head.
"Yeah, when you play with Jethro, or try to figure out what to do with your scrabble tiles. In a way, you are cute. But you're also beautiful, stunning, amazing, gorgeous… and I don't think that of Wendy. Or any other woman." he tells her. When she raises a skeptical eyebrow, he rolls his eyes.
"Okay, you got me, I do think that Sandra Bullock is gorgeous and so is Kate Beckinsale. But I don't want them any more than I want Wendy or any other woman that's not you." Tim tells her, kissing her gently. "I love you and I want to have sex with you, and only you."
Ziva gives a soft sigh, shaking her head in embarrassment. "I'm sorry. I… I'd say I didn't know what got into me, but that would be a lie. I should have trusted you, I mean, there is nothing wrong with looking and-"
Tim's finger on her lips silences her and he gives her a soft smile. "I didn't think when I made that remark. It's okay to be jealous, Ziva."
"Because jealousy is such a great thing. Wonder why it got Michael killed then." she mutters, her eyes widening in shock at her own statement. Tim frowns and gently pulls her to the couch, pushing her to sit down.
"You are not Tony, Ziva." he tells her, gently squeezing her hands. "In certain amounts, jealousy can be a good thing. Like, I'd be worried if I kissed another woman and you wouldn't be jealous or react to it at all. And wondering about your boyfriend finding other women attractive is not bad, not in the way you have been doing it. It was one time and you didn't obsess over it."
Ziva looks down at their hands, returning his pressure.
"I… need to say something." she realizes and looks up at him, waiting for him to nod. "I know we never talked about it and I honestly didn't think you'd ever agree to it, anyway, much less suggest it, but… I would not be able to stand an open relationship with us two dating other people on the side or something. And if you want that-"
"I don't." Tim shakes his head quickly. "It never crossed my mind, ever. And honestly, I wouldn't want it, either. The thought of someone else getting to touch you…" he cuts himself off, again shaking his head vehemently. "No."
"So, we stay like this? Just the two of us?" Ziva asks and Tim nods.
"Yeah. Just the two of us. And I'll watch my tongue from now on." he winks at her. Ziva narrows her eyes at him before sighing.
"No, don't, don't do that. I think I would want to know if you find someone else attractive, in that way. Just… don't do it in front of others?"
Tim nods, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to her forehead. "You know you can tell me, too."
"You already know about my crush on George Clooney." Ziva shrugs in an attempt at humor. Tim gives a short laugh and pulls her close. Ziva wraps her arms around him, inhaling his scent and allowing herself to relax into him.
"Hey, when you said that you had dated men with thinning hair and that gray hair can be very sexy…" Tim starts and leans back so he can look into her face, "do you have a thing for Fornell?"
Ziva swats at his chest but can't help the laugh bubbling up inside of her. "Of course. I could never say no to Tobias." she teases, shaking her head before pulling him in for a kiss.