"Katniss cut your leg."
"Not real, Cato did."
"Katniss tried to kill you in the first games."
"Not real, she thought I was helping the Careers kill her."
"Katniss is a mutt created by the Capitol."
"Not real, I'm the mutt."
"No Peeta, that's not real either. The Capitol did awful things to you and you have worked very hard to return to yourself." He takes a breath, "You love Katniss, real or not real, Peeta?"
I only hesitate slightly, "Real. Very real, Dr. Aurelius."
One day Dr. Aurelius suggest that Katniss should say every possible trigger word she can think of to see how I react. She takes that a step further and decides to yell the words at me.
"Blood! Knife! Games! Snow! Roses! Mutt! Capitol! Needles! Tracker Jackers! Venom! Bombs!" I take deep breaths the entire time and manage not to react. Dr. Aurelius is proud of me but isn't sure if I'm ready to return home yet. My physicians says I'm physically well enough to go back to 12, Dr. A isn't as convinced.
This is my third night in the hospital. Katniss stays with me now and there haven't been any major incidents. I'm on the mend but not quite there yet. Dr. Aurelius wants to do one more counter hijacking episode since the first one didn't go so well. I grudgingly agree and we plan it for the next day.
"How are you feeling this morning, Peeta?"
"Alright, doctor. Anxious to get home." He nods understandingly.
"So, today's treatment is going to be the same as the one the other day. We're going to give you a small dose of morphling and then have Katniss talk to you about some of your altered memories, sound good?"
"I guess, but I'm really not fond of needles." He laughs lightly and pats my shoulder. I notice I don't flinch this time.
"I know boy, but it's the best idea I have to help you. That's what we all want here, is to help you." I nod again and sit in the chair. The infamous chair with the straps attached send a chill through my body and I hesitantly sit down. I remind myself that this is a new Capitol, they're trying to help me.
One of the nurses begins to do up the restraints while another cleans my upper arm with a wipe that smells strongly.
"Small poke, Peeta." I nod and let out a breath as the needle goes in. The familiar wave of calm ripples over me and my muscles relax.
"Drugs have taken affect, Sir."
"Good. Give it one more minute and let's bring in Katniss." True to his word he waits another minute as I become calmer and asks if I'm ready for Katniss to come in. It's nice that he asks if I'm ready. I nod my head and in she comes.
She sits on a chair across from me, wearing a plain t-shirt and pants, "What would you like to talk about today, Peeta?" She sounds more like a doctor than the Katniss I know, or once knew.
"When did you figure out you loved me?" My words come out slowly and I pronounce each carefully. A look of shock appears on her face but she quickly masks it.
"Uh, well," she stammers out and I am suddenly fearful of her response. What if she never has loved me? No, she said she did that night, but did she mean it?
"I think I really knew when you walked into the force field. When Finnick was reviving you . . . there was a moment where I thought I might never see you again." She pauses, "Coin finally agreed to rescue you because I was falling apart and couldn't perform for her but when you got back and grabbed me- that wasn't even a possibility in my mind. I thought things would go right back to normal, that you'd be . . . well, yourself. I didn't know the extent of damage the Capitol was capable of." I nod, so she does love me?
"What about now?"
"Hmm?"
"How do you feel about me now?" She swallows.
"I can't feel about anybody that way anymore Peeta, everyone I love dies." She gets up and leaves after that leaving me in a state of disbelief. Do she admits to loving me but tells me she can't? Dr. Aurelius calls after her but has to focus on me.
"Room," I manage to say between deep breaths, "Take me to my room." I clench my fists and dig my nails into my palms. Two guards move in on me and drag me back to my room, I only struggle slightly. Once strapped to my bed I begin to flail and scream, yelling out awful things about that girl. The girl who has stolen my heart and now broken it.
Next chapter is already written, I'll update right away when I get 5 reviews. If that doesn't happen I'll update Wed. :)