Chapter 20: Not Begun to Fight!

Bright sunlight was shinning on her face and Ginny opened her eyes tiredly, though feeling better than she had since she lost Tom. She blinked a few times as she looked around her and she sat bolt-upright. Gasping for breath, as if she had been running for miles, she looked around and realized that she wasn't in her bed… but still in that strange room.

She was still surrounded by the mountain of junk—and she could see light coming from somewhere. There must be a window or something around here. It took her a minute for her to remember what happened last night and she looked in front of her to see the beautiful mirror was still there.

Where her wonderful dream was still continuing to play—she and Harry continued to dance and enjoy each other's company.

'They look so happy,' she thought to herself sadly at the happy image before she recalled why she was here in the first place. She turned to her side to see that the diary was still lying next to her.

She frowned at it, for some reason, she found herself less afraid of it than she had been before she spent the night here. It was as if this mirror had given her some newfound inner strength that she didn't know she had.

She picked herself up from the floor and slowly walked away, leaving the diary there where it lay. Fighting the urge to go back for it. She was leaving it here if she had a say in the matter… and hopefully, no one will find it here in this mountain of junk.

*A few days later*

"Why did they do this?" said a nervous third year to her friends. "Why take Dumbledore away now?"

"Yeah, we need him here," a tall girl asked before she glanced nervously over her shoulder as if she thought that the heir was there about to attack her.

"I heard that Malfoy's dad's behind it," a boy said to them.

"That spoiled brat?" she asked coldly. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Yeah, now he's strutting around the castle as if he stopped these attacks!" he answered angrily.

"And how much do you want to bet that he blackmailed the other governors?" the first girl asked.

It had been like this for the last couple days. People talking in the halls about Dumbledore's suspension and what was going to happen to them. Ginny couldn't help but feel responsible; after all, if it hadn't been for her, Dumbledore would still be here and she would be enjoying herself with no one worrying about being attacked.

Ginny had been able to put her mind away from Tom for the next few days in light of the exams that were due. Every morning when she woke up, she would roll miserably out of bed and went to the bathroom to wash and change.

She scrubbed, and washed, but she just couldn't seem to wash away how dirty she felt. Frustrated and sickened with herself she would eventually just throw the bar of soap away from her until it hit the wall and broke apart. Not that she cared.

Ever since Dumbledore left, the school was in a constant state of fear. So that was what Ron meant when he said that Dumbledore was gone. Her hatred for Malfoy went up as she waited with the rest of her classmates for the next teacher to escort them to lunch.

She then heard of them say, "I tried to visit Colin in the hospital wing. But Madam Pomfrey won't let anyone in anymore. Now that Dumbledore's gone, McGonagall doesn't want to take any chances. They think that the heir would try to finish them off now that Dumbledore isn't here anymore."

She sighed miserably, this was all her fault. She'd let it go too far and she knew that she had to tell someone. She was in way over her head and sinking ever deeper… and now she'd hurt two of her brothers because of her stubbornness. She had hurt Hermione, Ron and Harry's best friend and Penny was—is—Percy's girlfriend. Her brother had finally fallen for a girl and she took that away from him.

The looks on her two brothers faces these days have only made Ginny only feel more guilt-ridden than ever. She'll never be able to make up for all the damage she'd done. But a few days before exams, she found Ron at breakfast, twitching slightly as though he was relieving a very bad memory.

"Ron, are you okay?" she asked in concern; she knew that look and what it meant. "You look like you just saw a spider or something." Ginny knew her brother only looked like this whenever a spider was around… thanks the teddy bear incident years ago.

But at the word 'spider' Ron jumped and looked around him as if he thought there was some giant spider here to grab him. "Sp–spiders? No… no, I just was thinking about Hermione. I just wish they would just hurry up and wake her up," he said, not quite looking her in the eye.

Ginny bit her lip. Poor Ron… he was taking this so hard. But what on earth could she do to fix this? If she told them… she shivered, unsure of what to do anymore. Somehow she had been able to leave the diary back in that strange room and had been fighting Tom's influence… but who knows how much longer she'll be able to fight it? Who could she possibly go to?

She couldn't go to Professor Dumbledore because he wasn't here anymore with the school governors had suspending him. Professor McGonagall was in charge now. but that thought didn't make her feel any better. Was she just supposed to march right up and tell Professor McGonagall that she was the one who had turned some kind of monster on the students? Oh, no, she couldn't-she just couldn't… just thinking about it made her shake and palms sweat.

She hadn't slept in days… she had been too afraid to shut her eyes in case Tom might get at her in her dreams and make her go after someone else again. She'd been terribly lucky that nobody had died… but if she gives in one more time, she had a feeling she wouldn't be as lucky.

"Have you been up all night again, Ginny?" demanded a harsh voice, causing her to jump. She looked up to see that most of the students had already left lunch including Ron. She had been so lost in thought that she hadn't noticed. She looked around to see that it had been Percy who spoke.

Percy was staring at her. "Ginny," he said in an appalled tone that she didn't like. "Have you been bothering to take care of yourself at all? You look terrible. Look, I want you to go up to the Hospital Wing and let Madam Pomfrey fix you up."

Ginny felt anger boiling in the pit of her stomach as well as panic at the suggestion. "No-no, I can't!" she couldn't risk letting Tom enter her mind again. "I'm fine Percy!" she said firmly and got up. "I'm just worried over everything's that's happening! Aren't you?"

"Of course I am!" he said coldly. "But I also take care of myself. You look like you haven't slept in days!"

"I've been up studying for the exams," she said stubbornly and she felt her hatred for herself grow. Once again she was lying… lying and keeping secrets. Why did she have to find that stupid book?

"Look," she said, "I'll go to bed early tonight ok? Just let me handle this!" she then trying to walk past him. "I'm fine!" Ginny repeated, though she wasn't sure if she was telling Percy that or herself. Ginny now hated everything about herself. If only she hadn't been so stupid as to trust in Tom—and to let him become a part of her life—

"Ginny-" Percy said angrily, and he looked ready for a shouting match. But before he even opened his mouth again… that was when it happened.

Ginny… whispered a dark voice as if from the back of her mind. Ginny jumped at the deep tone and spun around. "What?" she cried out.

"What?" Percy repeated, clearly thinking that she was talking to him. "Ginny you aren't taking care of yourself! Keep this up and you will get sick!"

"Not that," Ginny said impatiently, "I mean… whose voice was that?"

"What voice?" he demanded as if he thought she was dim. "There isn't anyone else here! Ginny if you think you can get out of this by playing some kind of game then…"

Ginny…

She gulped so quickly she made a strange croaking sound.

Percy noticed and stopped ranting in surprise, "Ginny…?"

But she was no longer listening to him…

Had she really just heard Tom's voice?

"Ginny?" Percy demanded more impatiently when she didn't respond.

It was gone. That voice was gone… she could hear nothing but her own panicking breathing and Percy's voice that sounded like an annoying buzzing sound. She turned and ran from him, leaving her brother behind shouting at her, but she couldn't care less. Ginny was going crazy… she had to be… she could've sworn that she heard Tom's voice inside her own head! Of course, she never heard his voice before… but the voice she heard definitely wasn't her brother's. It was deeper, and more… relaxing… the kind of voice she expected someone like Tom to have.

Every day seemed more difficult than the last, as though Tom was trying to summon her back to him… like a master would beckon to his dog.

Ginny…

Ginny stopped dead in her tracks.

Ginny… the voice was more impatient now. Come to me…

She caught her breath. There it was again… it was Tom's voice… it had to be…

Was she truly going mad?

'I don't care anymore what you can do to me,' she lied inside her head, not having the slightest clue to if Tom could hear her. I'm going to tell someone… I don't know who but… she gripped her hair tightly as if hoping to tear it out. The only thing she could think of was that little black book lying there in that room in front of the mirror and…

Her eyes widened. Harry. Of course, Harry! He wasn't nearly as scary as Professor McGonagall, and after last year… yes, Harry would know what to do! The image of what the mirror showed her shown more clearly in her mind than anything else had. 'Harry,' she thought defiantly. 'I've got to tell Harry. If he can't help me I don't know who can!'

She wasn't sure if she was imagining it, but she could've sworn that she heard an echo of disdainful laughter from within her own mind.

How could she have ever trusted Tom?

The next day she made her way down to the Great Hall, staggering and having to hold onto the walls for support—the whole world seemed to blur around her as if she was in a dream. The last few nights of lack of sleep were taking their toll. But she was able to make it to the Hall on her own… though she was so dizzy, she could hardly make out anyone.

As soon as she walked over to the Gryffindor table, Professor McGonagall rose to her feet at the teacher's table and announced. "I have good news."

She looked up at her as the whole hall fell silent, wondering what she was going say. "Professor Sprout has informed me that the Mandrakes are ready for cutting at last. Tonight, we will be able to revive those people who have been Petrified. I need hardly remind you that one of them may well be able to tell us who, or what, attacked them. I am hopeful that this dreadful year will end with our catching the culprit."

Ginny went cold all over at those words. The culprit… that was her… and she could tell from McGonagall's voice, that it was clear that the culprit wasn't going to receive any mercy.

She was hardly aware of the cheers from the other students as she became lost in horrors of what was going to happen to her. They will know who did it. Her friends, the whole school, her family… everyone… even Harry was going to find out that it had been her all along… they would know without a doubt that it was her tonight. They won't understand… how was she supposed to tell them that a book made her do it? Yeah, sure… like they'll believe that. But she had to explain to them what happened before its too late, and she got expelled. She has to tell him.

Forcing herself to keep walking along the table, she spotted them near the end. Ron and Harry, both looking happier than they had all year, were talking to each other. Gritting her teeth, Ginny made her way over to where they sat, with Ron just saying, "It might be kinder to leave her where she is until they're over." Ginny didn't know what he was talking about, but that wasn't important now.

She took the empty seat next to them, and he glanced up at her. "What's up?" he asked lightly as if this was normal.

She tried to open her mouth… but it felt as if someone had glued her lips together and she couldn't stop herself from shaking. She looked up and down the table, praying that nobody but her brother and Harry were listening in, suddenly feeling dizzier than ever.

Ron looked at her. "Spit it out," he said sounding impatient.

She glanced at Harry, who was looking at her with his brow furrowed slightly as if he if was trying to remember something. Concentrating hard on not making eye contact with him even though she wanted him to hear this, she mumbled, "I've got to tell you something."

Harry's ears perked up, and he looked at her with more interest. "What is it?"

Her lip trembled. Confused and scared, Ginny tried with all her might to find the words to say to them.

Ron started to look annoyed. "What?" he said, urging her on.

Ginny opened her mouth, but her throat had closed up. She was trembling all over, shaking like a leaf, too nervous to do anything.

'You have to do this,' she told herself. 'Before it's too late. You'll regret it if you don't.' Ginny opened her mouth, but could not even utter a squeak.

Harry leaned over the table to her and said in a very low voice, "Is it something about the Chamber of Secrets?"

Her eyes widened. Harry leaned closer towards her and spoke softly; giving her a comfort and strength in his words she'd never felt before."Have you seen something? Someone acting oddly?"

She finally forced herself to look up into his green eyes. Her resolve to tell them about her involvement with the attacks faded… instead, she had another desire. She wasn't sure she would be able to stop this, and she knew that there was no way she would escape without punishment… let alone expulsion. But she at least wanted to let him know how she felt before he found out the truth. To let him know just how kind he was and how wonderful she thought he was. She at least had to tell him her feelings before it was too late. Ginny drew in her own strength with her breath. She knew then that she could do it. Holding her breath, she looked straight at Harry and–

"If you've finished eating, I'll take that seat, Ginny. I'm starving, I've only just come off patrol duty," a weary looking Percy said behind her, making Ginny jump up out of her seat, and nearly falling over it. Any courage she might've had, completely left her. Ginny looked at Percy, not knowing whether or not he'd heard their conversation. Rather than find out, she turned and ran out of the Great Hall. Behind her, she could hear Ron complaining. "Percy! She was just about to tell us something important!"

She couldn't face her friends now. She couldn't face anyone as she ran through the school, half blinded to where she was going. She darted down a side corridor and slumped into an alcove. She hugged herself tightly as she slid down the wall and hid her face in her knees and cried. She sobbed her heart out, not caring if anyone found or heard her.

She wasn't the same person anymore and she would never be the same happy Ginny Weasley again. She had become slightly gaunt and as pale as any of the ghosts. She lost so much weight and was longing to sleep… it was as if her very spirit was slowly creeping out of her body, leaving nothing but an empty shell of the person she once was.

Ginny…

She froze and was so shocked that she stopped crying.

Come…

"No," she whispered softly. She clamped her hands tightly over her ears, though it did no good because the voice was echoing inside her own mind.

Come…

"N-No," she whimpered.

But somehow, she felt stronger against him—able to fight him harder than she did before. More so than she had felt in a long time. Perhaps it was because she knew that the potion was almost done and everyone would soon awake again, even though it meant that everyone would know that it was her behind these attacks. Or maybe it was that she felt that indescribable surge of comfort, looking into Harry's eyes that let her fight back.

She could hear Tom's calls to her ringing in her head, and they were difficult to ignore. She had already given him so much of herself, it was impossible to know if she or HE was controlling her own thoughts. But she had to fight this overwhelming desire. She hated what she had become, but she hated Tom more for having caused all this.

Almost dreamlike she felt her body walking again… she could feel it, but was this time she was in control. She walked back up to the seventh floor and was so out of it that the next thing she knew she was in that room again. She wandered through the mess of junk to where it was. She knelt down to dig the diary from the floor.

She pulled out ink and a quill from her pocket. She let the bottle fall to the floor and ink splashed at her feet, staining her robes, but she didn't care.

Tom… she wrote almost dreamlike.

Welcome back Ginny,he wrote back, even his handwriting sounded pleased.

Trying not to let herself slip into the anger she felt boiling up within her, Ginny allowed herself to feel slightly smug as she wrote, Not for long, Tom. I've come to tell you it's over. The Mandrake Draught is nearly ready, and tonight all your victims will be freed again. Everyone will know who is responsible for all of this. And when they know it was me, you won't be able to hurt anyone else.

And what of you, Ginny? Surely you don't want to be expelled? Tom wrote haughtily.

I don't care anymore,she said, unsure if she had written it or said it out loud. But she knew she spoke the truth. She didn't care what happened to her anymore. She didn't care what Tom did to her so long as he was stopped. She would show them the diary and show them what Tom could do. She would take any punishment they had to dish out… so long as they did something about Tom, maybe they would take enough pity to not expel her if she confessed.

To her horror, she could hear him laughing from inside her mind and this time there was no mistaking that voice. She felt tears burning her eyes but she frowned and thought about all the rude names she could imagine.

Now that is rude of you, dear Ginny, his voice said inside her. But I'm afraid to tell you that your plan to hand me over won't work. You see… thanks to you, I have grown powerful, far more than you can ever imagine.

'Tom, you need me. You can't do anything without me or the diary,' she shot back, feeling braver.

You would be right, Tom admitted. There was a time where that was indeed true. I couldn't have done anything without you or the diary… however, I no longer need the diary. Thanks to you, I am almost ready.

'Ready for what?' she asked and he laughed again.

Why spoil the surprise? he asked in a teasing tone that sent shivers up her spine. But rest assure that you will find out very soon.

'I'm not afraid of you. Not anymore,' Ginny thought angrily.

Oh, but you should be, he chided as if he was talking to a child. For you see… I am more powerful than you could ever imagineyou silly little girl, and soon you will see how right I am. I just have one final task for you to do, and then I will leave you alone… forever.

'Why do I doubt that?' Ginny demanded, though her heart leapt at the thought of him leaving and never having to hear his voice again.

She heard him laugh again and she felt sick. Just come with me… and soon it will all be over.

Ginny was suddenly spinning in a whirl of color, and knew what he was about to do. But before she lost conscience, she saw it once more…

She saw the mirror and the beautiful image that it showed her… that reflection was all it took.

She refused to fall back asleep. She fought his hold over her this time. "You won't take me without a fight!" she yelled out.

(So it's about to happen. Next chapter: The Chamber of Secrets. What do she and Tom talk about? Hope you enjoy it, and for those of you who have been asking me about my Discovering the Legend stories, yes, I know they were deleted. But I've moved them to another site. It's all on my profile if you need to know where. Otherwise, I hope you liked this story… I'm thinking about five more chapters.)