Chapter 21

Oliver was thinking seriously about his 'to do' list.

He had so many things to resolve. So many things to finish.

First, he has to decide what he was going to do with his son. He couldn't give up William. No. he would never do that. May be he thought about that for a bit before he met his son. But, after meeting him, it was out of question. He wanted to be a father to that little boy. A father who cares, a father who loves, a father who stays.

Oliver wanted it badly.

He wanted to be the father he never had. He didn't want to abandon his son. And it was time that some of the parents' responsibilities taken away from Felicity. She has had enough. He wanted to share those responsibilities with her.

Talking about Felicity, Oliver has to decide about how he should approach her.

Now the marriage matter between them is talked, analyzed and finished, Oliver had to decide what to do next.

He knew that the path they were taking is very narrow. They were always walking on eggshells around each other. He wanted that to change. He wanted to go back to the comfortableness which they had before he messed up everything.

And what about his other 'persona'?

He wanted to do what his father asked of him. He wanted to clean the city and save the city. But after several missions on his own, Oliver has realized that this was very difficult to achieve alone. There was too much at risk.

And Diggle was already suspecting him of a foul act.

Oliver didn't have the technological knowledge to go further.

He terribly needed someone on whom he can rely on, in a mission.

If he ended up injured in some dark alley, the only thing he could do was to try his best to return to his foundry without bleeding until death.

Oliver was in serious trouble.

…

A week after the party at Queen Mansion, Oliver was down in the 'Verdent', Tommy's club with Diggle tagging along with him. Before Oliver's trip to china, Tommy has asked Oliver to be a part of the business, but Oliver was not much interested. But, now he was thinking differently. If he was to be a partner of Tommy's club, it will be a great cover for his night time activities. No one would suspect him for going out and missing in the night.

Oliver came here to discuss the partnership with Tommy.

Tommy was at his office, which was situated at the upper floor.

"Hi, can I come in?"

Oliver knocked the door and entered. Diggle remained at the corridor.

"You are already in, Queen. So why trying to break my door?" Tommy stood up from his chair and came forward.

"I wanted to warn you before entering. Who knows if there's a beautiful girl inside with you." Oliver said smirking.

"Those happy days are over, Ollie. Now I'm fully committed to one girl and at the risk of getting legally assaulted if I ever cheated on her." Tommy replied.

"I thought I would never see the day you committing to someone, Tommy."

"That makes us two." Tommy sat on the couch.

Oliver took the chair near the window.

"So, why my best friend take interest in showing up here?" Tommy asked.

"I wanted to know whether your offer for a partnership for this club is still available." Oliver told him.

"Oh, yeah. It is always available for you, Ollie. But, may I know why you are suddenly interested in this?" Tommy's gaze was intense, as if he wanted to see Oliver through.

"Urrrm… well… I want to do something aside from QC?" Oliver stuttered.

Tommy gave him an apprehensive look.

"Or, you would want to do something that could give a cover to your night time activities?"

Oliver didn't know what hit him first. The calculating stare and the grave voice of Tommy, or the words that came out of his mouth.

Oliver blinked twice.

Then he swallowed the lump in his throat and asked,

"What activities are you…." and was interrupted.

"Oh, cut the crap, Oliver. I know what you are doing, who you are. You can lie to Moira and the others, but not to me. I know you too well."

"Well… I don't know…" Oliver was not sure whether Tommy actually knew what he was doing or, was talking about something totally different.

Tommy came towards Oliver and put his hands on either side of Oliver's chair and whispered to Oliver.

"I know what you are doing in a green hood, Oliver."

Oliver knew he looked like a trapped rat. Hell! He felt like a trapped rat.

And Tommy chuckled.

"You actually thought you can hide that from me?"

Oliver sighed.

"Tommy…"

"After you went missing, I tried my best to find you. Along with Diggle's help I managed to find a lot of things you hid from us, Ollie. Things like you being in Bratva."

Oliver didn't know what to tell anymore. So he stayed silent.

"I was shocked, I must say. But not much as shocked to know that you were the new bratva captain here, that Felicity was looking for. I was shocked because, Felicity couldn't reveal you."

At the mention of Felicity's name, Oliver could feel cold seeping in to his spine. No, he didn't want to go there.

"Then I thought to myself, that that was impossible. Felicity is a genius. There was no way that she wouldn't find out about your little secret, unless she already did and decided to not to tell us."

Oliver opened his mouth to deny, but was stopped by Tommy's hand gesture of 'Do not interrupt'.

"Don't try to deny it, Ollie. I already asked her and she admitted to it." Oliver was stunned.

"After you came back, I thought of confronting you a several times, but I didn't have the chance. Then we got kidnapped and the 'hood guy' made an appearance. I was not in my most somber state of mind Oliver, but I was 100% sure that I saw YOU fighting with them."

Oliver looked away, knowing that now there was no chance of denying anything.

"I didn't tell anything to SCPD and I listened to your description of the hood guy. I waited because I wanted to see where you were getting with this. Then again you asked me to organize a party where Adam Hunt was attacked. Then you and I heard Laurel talking with her friend about that 'Marcus guy' stealing public money and next thing I know is that he is too attacked by the vigilante."

Tommy gave another chuckle and continued.

"And guess how much surprised I was, when I understood that all these people who you killed were your father's close associates and somehow involved in his murder too. Yeah, I and Diggle looked into your father's murder case. They were involved but there are no distinct proofs to confirm that."

"Tommy, I…"

"You don't have to give any explanation Oliver, not to me. But I want to know what happened. How did you turned into a killer? Why? And what is your intention? What do you want to prove by doing this? Most of all what happened to you at that island?"

Oliver took a heavy breath and calmed down himself. He never expected Tommy to be this much sensible. He thought that Tommy would freak out. That he would run away. But Oliver didn't expect this.

Tommy was calm and looking into his eyes expectantly.

"We messed up. Big time."

Oliver suddenly said.

"We… as..?"

"Me and my dad. We were in a bad place. Dad was in a very powerful position in Bratva. Yet he did the unforgivable mistake of betrayal. He was working with other mob gangs and corrupted businessmen in Starling. He betrayed Bratva. He expected to have Rochevs' support by my marriage to Isabel. I didn't know about his plans and I broke up with Isabel. I thought that he was insisting on me marrying Isabel, because he wanted more power. But, apparently a lot of things other than power were at risk, such as our lives."

Oliver took a breath, and continued.

"Dad was livid when he got to know what I had done. He cursed me. He accused me of putting him at the line. I was angry too. We had a huge raw and I left home. Even though I was so angry at him, I wanted to get both of us from this mess. But for that I wanted a lot more information on the Bratva and other mob gangs. I wanted to know their weak points so I could bargain on something. And I needed a trustworthy ally, who could provide me that without exposing me. So I tried to contact the only person whom I knew to be that."

"Felicity." It was not a question, rather a statement from Tommy.

"Yeah. She was my only hope. And I tried to contact her on my own. I failed. Then I went to Thea and I begged her asking for Felicity's contacts. But Thea refused to help me. I couldn't tell her truth. Finally I did the only thing I could do; I got into that boat to go to China. The Chinese mob was our last resort. If they turned their back on my father, that was his end. And you and I both know how it turned out. They killed my father."

Oliver sighed and put his head on his hands.

"But that doesn't explain what you are doing, Ollie." Tommy said.

Oliver raised his head and looked straightly to Tommy's eyes. Tommy was calm and collected, and was listening intently to Oliver. There wasn't judgment in his eyes.

Oliver started again.

"The day the boat was wrecked, my dad called me through my satellite phone. It was decided by both of us that we are not to be contacted with each other unless it was a matter of life and death. Yet he called and I understood that this may be the last time I spoke to him, not because I had any hunch that our boat will go down that day, rather I thought it was my dad's last day. The first thing he told me was that he was sorry. He was sorry that he put me in this position."

Oliver took a heavy breath and continued.

"He said that he had promised mom that he wouldn't drag me into his dangerous work, yet he did. So he was sorry. He said he did wrongs to the people who were close to him and hurt the people who loved him. So he was sorry. He said he regret the decisions he took in life to achieve power, which made him fall in eyes of his loved ones. He said he betrayed Bratva, and he was working with many criminals in the city and around the world, that now even he can't change the consequences of his doings. He said the Starling city is in a severe danger, there are some people who wanted the city to fall. And my dad had helped them. He wanted me to save the city. He wanted me to protect the people in this city because he had failed this city."

Oliver finished.

"So, you started hunting down criminals just after you came back? It doesn't make any sense Ollie. You are not saving the city; instead you are putting it in more danger. The criminals get encouraged by your work. They think that we have a right to defy law, if we don't like how the things going. It's not the right path. And you are correcting your dad's wrongs by being a killer yourself! How on earth is that right? It is not right Ollie. You have to find another way."

"But there is no other way, Tommy. These criminals don't understand any other way."

Oliver protested.

"But, you understand. You don't have to kill them. You can handover them to SCPD, or law."

"And they will get through the loop holes and be on their merry way in no time." Oliver snapped.

"Then make sure that they don't get away. Make a stable front. Provide solid proofs. That's how Felicity does. That's how she worked with Police. We can help you." Tommy snapped back.

Oliver looked surprised.

"What? You think we will let you continue this crusade, just like that?" Tommy asked Oliver with a smug look.

"I don't want any of you near this crusade, Tommy." Oliver growled.

Tommy was not affected at all.

"Oh, cut the crap, Oliver. If you continue like this, soon we will find you bled to death in a dark alley. You need help. You need tech support and you need back up. Most of all you need someone to pull your head up from the place where it is stuck and to give you a kick in the ass once in a while."

"I am not changing my decision." Oliver said getting up from his seat.

"Think of it Ollie. And by the way, this discussion is not finished. We still didn't get to the part what happened to you in that island and how you become a killer who is running around the city in tight leather pants carrying a bow." Tommy said.

"They are not that tight." Oliver replied.

"and I want to know why the hell you took Sara with you on that damned cruise, I mean it would have made sense at least you invited me." Tommy gave him his famous Tommy Merlin egostical look.

"As much as I'm sorry that I took Sara with me, I 'm so releived that I didn't invite you for that, Tommy." Oliver replied with a sigh.

Tommy nodded in understanding.

"Would I t upset you if I went to see Laurel today? I want to talk to her. I think that after all the things happened last few days; maybe she is a bit cooled down."

Oliver asked Tommy.

"I also think that, she is a bit calmed down now. So, go visit her and please don't make her angry again. Because then it would be me again suffering." Tommy gave Oliver a pat in the shoulder.

"And take a tub of ice cream with you. That always works." Tommy advised again.

"Thanks." Oliver muttered while giving Tommy a hug. And he turned the door knob to leave.

"Just think about what I said Ollie. My offer still stands." Both Tommy and Oliver knew that this time, Tommy wasn't talking about the club.

Oliver didn't reply. He made through the door and saw Diggle standing near the door outside and left the club with him.

To Laurel's.

…..

Next morning Oliver was driving to Felicity's. He has given Diggle a holiday as a token of appreciation for yesterday's bravery. Of course Diggle refused it but Oliver was very insistent. And he told Diggle that he was spending the day at Felicity's.

Yesterday evening was like an episode from an action movie.

He had shown up at Laurel's place with an ice cream tub in hand. Laurel was not very happy about his presence at first but she invited him inside and listened to his apologies patiently this time. And at the end of the conversation she was sharing the ice cream he brought with him and they were okay after nearly five years. Oliver was happy at the turning of the events. Laurel was his oldest friend in Starling city except for Tommy. They went through several rough patches yet they never hated each other until the trip to China.

Oliver was not sure that they would be able to come back from Sara's death.

Then Oliver heard a noise. A slight creak. Yet he heard it. Oliver only had time to yell Laurel to get down.

A Chinese gangster, China white was present in Laurel's living room. Everything was a blur. Diggle broke in to the room, along with the two policemen who were at Laurel's door. There were shots taken. Oliver threw Laurel on the floor and covered her. Diggle was fighting with another gangster. When Diggle's life was endangered at one moment, Oliver threw a knife at the gangster. And after a few minutes SCPD arrived and finished the fight. Yet china white had escaped.

Then Oliver had to face very angry Captain Lance. He threatened Oliver to not to come near his daughter again. Oliver took off after that.

Even though the night didn't go as he planned, Oliver was happy. He had come to an understanding with Laurel. They were not friends, but not enemies any more. That was very important to the happiness of his family, because in near future, Laurel is going to be his sister-in-law, and Oliver wanted to start their relationship without past mistakes hanging over their heads.

He was at Felicity's door and he knocked expecting Raisa to open the door as usual. Yet when the door was opened it was Felicity behind the door.

"Hi, Rai… Felicity…" Oliver changed the greeting when he saw it was Felicity.

"Hi" Felicity left the door to be closed by him and went inside, without giving him her usual warm smile.

"Where is Raisa?" Oliver asked following her to the living room.

"She took a three day vacation. Her niece is visiting central city ad Raisa wanted to spend some time with her." She replied without even giving him a glance.

Oliver sensed that something was wrong. Felicity was okay with him for last few days. Today she was upset over something. He could definitely see that. So he moved carefully on thin ice.

"Where is William?" Oliver asked in a guarded voice, giving Felicity a carefully covered look.

"He didn't wake up yet." Felicity's answer surprised him Oliver knew that William was an early-riser like he himself.

"Still? It's late." Oliver said.

"He went to bed late last night." Felicity returned. She went to kitchen and Oliver followed her there.

"Why did he go to bed late? You are not supposed to let him stay late at nights, Felicity." As soon as the words left his lips Oliver knew he crossed a red line.

Felicity turned round at him like a bullet. Her eyes blazing with anger.

"What did you say? You don't have any say on what I supposed to do or not supposed to do with my son, Oliver. Don't you dare implore otherwise."

Felicity's words made him angry. Even though he had promised himself over and over to be patient with Felicity, she always managed to step on his toes.

"He is my son too, Felicity. I always have a say in his life. You can't deny my rights, just because you adopted him."

"If you want your right as his father, act as his father, Oliver. He was awake last night because he saw you on TV again in news of a mob fight. He was so upset. I tried to call you through the night but your phone was off. Every time we put the TV on, your face is there, always in a dangerous situation. William got his dad back from death few days ago, and since then his dad was kidnapped, was in a party at a crime scene and then at a mob fight, at Laurel's place for that."

Felicity was spatting words in a low voice. Mostly for the benefit of the sleeping child in the next room.

"I didn't get kidnapped by my choice, Felicity. And I was at a party that day. I didn't know about the crime. And what do you mean by that last sentence? At Laurel's place? What difference does it make that where I was at the time?"

Oliver asked with the same hushed but angry voice.

"William doesn't like Laurel. He was upset because he thought you were in danger because of her." Felicity replied.

Oliver huffed.

"What rubbish? Why would William think like that, unless you put something like that in his head?"

"Excuse me. I didn't put anything in his head Oliver. Laurel hates William. She made sure that he knows that even at the very first and only time she met him." Felicity's voice was rising.

"Laurel isn't like that. I was there last night with her. She didn't even mention him." Oliver defended Laurel.

"Exactly. She pretends like he doesn't even exist. That way it is easy for her to keep her head cool. But that is not the point here Oliver."

"Yeah, the point is that you making a simple thing difficult, Felicity. Yes I was at Laurel's at last night. Why I went there, is mine and Laurel's business. Not yours. Why do you even care, where I go? Is that jealousy I'm sensing? " Oliver asked with a raised brow.

"Huh, in your dreams, Queen. I don't care where you go and what you do with whom, Oliver. But I do care if my child's father put himself in the middle of a mob war. I care if you not answer the phone when I call you at night, when your son needs to assure himself that his dad is safe. I care if you went to Tommy's fiancé's place and again mess up the things between them." Felicity sounded tired.

She sat on the kitchen stool.

Oliver wanted to tell her that Tommy knew that he went there. But he wanted to know whether she is affected by his visit to Laurel's. Did she care for him?

"I didn't go there to sleep with her, Felicity. But I want to remind you the fact that if you would have said 'yes' to me when I asked you to marry me, instead of humiliating me in front of my family, it would be to you that I return to every night, to here, to William. Then you wouldn't have to call me at night to assure William. I would have been at his side every night." Oliver knew it was a low blow. But he didn't care. He wanted to prove his point.

Felicity looked shocked. She opened her mouth to reply and closed it again. Oliver stared at her blue eyes trying to decipher the looks that crossed her face.

"You said 'no' to him?"

They both snapped out of their conversation at the sound of the little boy. William was frowning at Felicity.

"Good morning, Will." Oliver greeted him but was ignored by the child. William was staring at Felicity.

"You don't want to marry my father?" William asked again.

Felicity looked stunned with the confrontation.

"Will…" she started.

"You don't want me to have family?" William was having no excuses.

"William." This time it was Oliver.

"You don't want to be my mom, Lizz?" William asked again.

"I am your mother, Will." Felicity managed to reply. But her voice was broken.

"No, you are not. You adopted me, Lizz. But you are not really my mom. But, if you marry my dad, you would be my mom. So don't you want to be my mom anymore?"

Oliver could see that the boy's words broke Felicity. What ever happened between them Felicity didn't deserve this.

"Will, she is your mother, no matter what happens. She always will be. Just as I'm your father."

"No, she doesn't want me anymore. She doesn't love me anymore." William yelled.

"Will.." Felicity tried to talk.

"No, I want both my mom and dad with me. I want a family. You don't want me to have a family. You will leave me to him and you will start a family without me. I know that. You are going to leave me too." William was hysterical.

Felicity shook her head in denial, her eyes were wet now. Oliver stood there stunned.

"I love you Will. I will never leave you. I promise. But I can't marry your dad. I'm sorry." She said in a trembling voice.

But William was not going to settle.

"No. you don't love me. If you don't want me, I don't want you either. I don't love you. I hate you. You are not my mother." William was both crying and screaming.

Felicity visibly flinched with his words.

"William." Oliver tried to stop the child and to hold him. But was unsuccessful.

"I hate you. I hate you. I hate you." William screamed and got out of Oliver's hands and ran towards his room crying.

Oliver stood there staring at the running boy stunned and turned to see Felicity breaking down little by little.

It was like slow motion.

Her face was paled. Eyes full of tears. She was in a shocked state. Then at once she was going to fall. Oliver took a step forward and stopped when she held her hand out. She leaned to the wall and her other hand came up and she closed her mouth with it. She was trying her best to not break down in front of him. Then she turned around and fled to her room.

Oliver didn't know what to do. Should he go after his son or Felicity?

He chose his son. Felicity needed space. He knew that from experience. And he had to tell some things to William.

William was crouched in to a ball in his bed. He was crying. When Oliver entered the kid's room William turned his back on him.

Oliver sat down on the edge of the bed and caressed the child's head.

"Do you know that I met your mother, Felicity five years ago?" Oliver asked. He didn't expect an answer. But he knew the child was listening.

"She was only 19 then. When we first met, we didn't like each other. I insulted her and she returned the favor." Oliver chuckled.

"Then I had to work with her. She was my assistant at my office. We fought a lot. Yet we were good for each other. She was my right hand. As time went by we grew close. We became friends. She was very special to me. She was my partner. Then we became very close and she said me that she loves me."

William turned his head towards Oliver. He had stopped crying. So Oliver continued.

"I was scared. I didn't love her. And I didn't want to marry her or anyone for that matter. So I did a very stupid thing. I rejected her love. I insulted her. I hurt her badly. I forgot that she was my friend first. I hurt her again and again. She tried to stay away from me, but I went after her and humiliated her. When it was too much, she left me. She left her home. To central city. That's when I understood what I did. I hurt my friend, not by not loving her, but by not being her friend. I broke her trust. And even after I understood my fault, I was a coward. I didn't go after her and apologize. I chose to not say sorry." Oliver sighed. William was staring at him with wide eyes.

"Then I got lost in that island and I lost my chance to say sorry. When I came back after nearly 04 years, I was impatient to meet her and apologize for what I did. But, that was when I learned about you. When I got to know that she raised you, I was shocked. I wouldn't have done that for a person who hurt me that much. But, Felicity raised you as her own son. She loved you without any restriction. Even after me, your dad hurt her so much she loved you enough to give you a home, William. And she didn't even deny my rights on you. She could if she wanted."

Oliver stopped and looked at his son. He wanted William to take this in to his heart,

"I apologized to her. But I was 04 years late. Of course she didn't hold a grudge; her love for you showed me that. But it is very hard to forgive a person who played with your heart William. She is right to not wanting to marry me. How could she marry me, when I had already rejected her once? How can she give me her heart when I had already had crushed it under my foot? It's not that she doesn't want to be your mother. She is already your mother, Will. And she always will be. Even if she marries someone other than me and has other children, you will be her first child; always. It's that it takes time to forgive someone who broke your heart. We have to give her space and time. If I proved to her that I'm not that person who hurt her anymore, she will forgive me and accept me into her life. But, we have to wait, son."

William sniffled. "I'm sorry, dad."

"I think it's not me you owe an apology, Will." Oliver kissed his son's hair and got up.

"You and I are very lucky to have her in our life. And it's good to not wait for 04 years to say sorry." Oliver left the room with that.

He went towards Felicity's room. The door to her room wasn't closed. Yet he didn't enter the room, but stayed at the door, leaning to the doorframe.

Felicity was sitting on the edge of the bed. She had stopped sobbing. She was staring into nowhere. Her shoulders shook though. There were very visible two streaks of tears along her cheeks.

Oliver felt his heart clenching. When he came here he didn't think the day would be going like this. He knew that their marriage situation or the news of no-marriage should be explained to William carefully.

When they fought in the morning, he didn't expect his son to listen. He rather wanted to make Felicity regret the decision to reject him. As all of his well laid plans it had also went out of hand.

Oliver heard the soft footsteps. Then felt soft hands wrapping around his legs. He looked down to his son who was staring into the room just like him.

A shiver went up on Felicity's body and she tightly clutched the bed sheet in her hands as another sob came through. William released Oliver's leg and ran towards his mother.

"Mommy… I'm sorry"

Felicity raised her head and looked surprising at him through her tear filled eyes. The child threw himself at her and wrapped his arms around her neck. She managed to hold him secured.

"I'm sorry, mommy. For hurting you. I will never do that again. I love you. I love you so much. Please forgive me. Please don't leave me." The little boy was crying and muttering the words to her neck.

Felicity didn't say anything but, held him close to her heart.

William broke the contact and stared to her eyes.

"Please tell me you forgive me, mommy. I'm really sorry. Please don't leave me." He said again.

Felicity managed a small smile.

"No. Will. I will never leave you. And I forgive you. Don't worry." She kissed his tear streaked cheeks and hugged him again.

Oliver watched the interaction between the mother and the child. He wanted to go there. He wanted to wrap his arms around them. He wanted to encircle his world by his body. Yes, they were his world. His own world. His son and his Felicity.

'His Felicity?' where did that come from?

Just then her ocean blue eyes met his over their son's head. He saw the acknowledgement in her eyes. she closed her eye lids once and said silently that she appreciated what he did, even though she didn't know what he did.

Oliver nodded once and turned around to leave the house to give some space to the two most important people in his life.

He knew that the mother and son would forget all about the fight over a tub of mint chip chocolate ice cream.