Undertale: Long Road
By: Nathan Weaver
Chapter: 21
"What was that called?" Frisk eagerly pointed out the window towards fluffy white clouds before turning back to Asgore and smiling as she waited for the answer. They'd been playing this game since leaving home. She'd point to something she could see while they were driving, and he'd tell her it was called in the language of the monsters, back before the war.
"Oh, those?" Asgore asked, barely taking his eyes off the road as he gestured toward the cloud with his head. "We called that, scamaill." The ancient word rolled off the monster's tongue in a way that made her think of huge stone castles, and men riding horseback across the countryside.
"Scamaill," Frisk repeated with a grin, testing the word to see how the word felt in her mouth before searching for something else to point to.
They were well out of the city, driving along the backside of Mt. Ebott. As such, little could be seen that wasn't natural. She'd already pointed at some houses, the trees, and at the nearby mountain peak. So by now, she was having trouble finding anything she hadn't pointed to already.
Briefly, she considered pointing to a passing patch of wildflowers but decided against it for fear of drawing more attention to Flowey. Since they'd left, he'd mostly kept quiet while making himself at home on her lap. All things considered, she didn't want to disturb that.
With Asgore being so close, she knew the last thing he'd want is to do was draw attention to himself. At the same time, she couldn't help noticing how he would perk up whenever the older monster was talking. Thinking about that made her smile. He'd never admit it, but she was sure Flowey wanted to talk to him. Even after all this, he was still his dad after all.
"What about those?" Frisk asked as she pointed at a road sign for the town of Ebott. "What were those called?"
"What, road signs?" Asgore asked as he furrowed his brow in concentration. "You know, I don't think we had those actually!"
"Wait, so did you not have roads then?" Frisk slowly shook her head as her eyes went wide in disbelief. She was positive they had to have roads, how else could they have gotten around?
"Well, we did have roads of a sort," Asgore shrugged as he looked at Frisk with a sheepish smile. "I don't think you'd recognize them. They were just some dirt paths that connected a few villages. Nothing like these large smooth roads you have now."
"But, what if you needed to go somewhere else?" Frisk asked.
"We didn't," Asgore said with a sigh before quickly gesturing to the outside with one hand. "This land, this small corner of the world between the mountain and sea, this was only home we had ever known. I don't think a single one of us had ever left it before."
"I can't imagine that," Frisk said as she looked out at the vast scenery. It wasn't like she had seen that much more of the world herself. But, it was still difficult to fathom how small the world had to have been back then. For her, she could see so much of it through books, or the internet, or even television. For Asgore, this area had been his entire world.
"It was a different time," slowly, a thin nostalgic smile crept onto the monster's face. "Everything we ever knew and loved, it was all here. You would've been hard-pressed to find many that wanted to leave it.
"Still, didn't you ever wonder about going somewhere else?"
"We talked about it," Asgore said as he glanced at her. "But, it wasn't just a matter of picking up and leaving. I mean, we would've needed to build ships, figure out food that didn't spoil, how to navigate, and, we didn't have anywhere to go anyway."
Without thinking about it, Frisk began chewing on her lower lip as she eyed the older monster. The way he'd stiffened up as he had spoken, and tried to brush away the topic meant that this was almost certainly a sensitive area for him.
There was a part of her that wanted to leave it at that. What right did she have to dredge up memories he wasn't comfortable sharing. At the same time, she really wanted to know. She almost needed to know. These were her people now, weren't they? Maybe not by birth, but, shouldn't she learn as much about them as she could? She was about to open her mouth to ask just that when the former king of monsters quietly cleared his throat.
"Frisk," Asgore began before trailing off, his lips moving soundlessly for but a moment as he struggled for the right words. "Do you know that phrase, a watched pot never boils?"
"Yeah, I think so," Frisk said, widening her eyes as she was put on the spot. "Doesn't that mean something like food takes forever to cook while you're watching it?"
"Yeah, pretty much," Asgore smiled. "History is like that too, except, you don't even know if the stove is on. And, if it is, there's no telling who lit the fire."
"I'm not sure if I get it," Frisk said slowly, feeling truly confused.
"Yeah, it probably isn't a good analogy," Asgore shrugged and let out a long breath before he seemed to come to a decision.
"I don't blame them," Asgore began uncomfortably and grimaced, his lips moving wordlessly as he struggled to correct himself. "The situation back then wasn't anyone's fault, not really."
"Who's not to blame?" Frisk asked as she furrowed her brow in thought, though she suspected she knew the answer.
"The humans," the words were like a shameful admission out of Asgore's mouth, and he turned to give her an apologetic smile. "I should probably back up, shouldn't I?"
Frisk could only slowly nod in agreement. She could understand why Asgore might not want to sit and talk about everything humans had done in front of her. But, she still wanted to know.
"We wanted to move," Asgore began quietly. "We loved our land, but each year it seemed like we saw more and more humans upon our shores."
"But, I thought humans and monsters got along back then?" Frisk squirmed slightly. The idea that they had never truly been at peace, really bothered her for some reason.
"We did, for the most part," Asgore let out a heavy sigh and continued. "But, along with spices, tools, and whatever else they could sell us, they also brought along their stories." He smiled at that, but somehow it seemed almost bitter to her. "They'd tell of heroes and their triumphs over creatures much like ourselves. Tell stories of empires that stretched from one ocean to another. And, they told us of terrible wars and the deaths that had followed them."
"You, were scared of us?" the thought actually hurt her little.
"Not of you child, I would never be frightened of you!" turning, Asgore looked at her and smiled warmly, his eyes brimming with affection. For a moment, she thought he was going to lean over and give her a hug, but instead, he looked back to the road, seeming to have thought better of it.
"But yes, at the time your people were somewhat intimidating, " Asgore admitted as he spread one hand in a calming apologetic matter. "And, every year we were seeing more of them."
"So, that's why you talked about leaving?" Frisk asked with a slow nod.
"Not me personally, but yeah that's what started it," Asgore sighed tiredly. "But, when we looked for somewhere new, we found that we were boxed in, trapped. Mankind had already spread out and settled everywhere. So, all we could do was watch, and wonder if everything would ever boil over."
Moments stretched onward in silence, and it slowly dawned on Frisk that she didn't know what to say about any of this. She tried to imagine what it must've been like, but she couldn't get a handle on it. What must it have felt like, to see the world stretching out before you while knowing that it all belonged to something else? At the very least, it seemed cruel to her.
As she sat trying to process this new revelation, a high-pitched siren began to wail somewhere off behind her. Her eyes went wide as she turned to catch sight of the flashing lights of the police car, and the officer motioning for Asgore to pull over.
"Oh," Asgore said uncomfortably as he slowed the vehicle and gave Frisk a reassuring look. "Don't worry, it's probably nothing."
Frisk knew he was right, but at the same time as the car slowly came to a stop, she couldn't help feeling a growing sense of dread. She knew It was stupid to feel that way. It wasn't like she'd done anything bad, not recently at least. But, for some reason, she couldn't help thinking about the time she'd walked out of a store with a pair of socks when she was little.
Shaking that crazy thought from her head, she looked down to check on Flowey. As he looked back up at her, she gave him a reassuring smile. All things considered, he seemed to be fine, if maybe a bit tense. Still, in situations like this, it was best to keep an eye on him.
Careful not to clip his horns, Asgore poked his head out of the window and peered back at the approaching policemen. "Something I can help you with, officer?"
"Naw, nothing like that," said the rotund mustached man as he walked up to the car while eyeing the van in admiration. "I just thought I'd let you know that…" The officer froze, his mouth hanging open as he stared at Asgore and blinked.
"Let me know what?" Asgore prompted as he brought a hand to his face and struggled not to grin.
"Oh, yeah right!" the officer quickly shook his head and let out a nervous chuckle. "Your car, I saw it leaking fluid back there."
"Really?!" Asgore furrowed his brows and looked back at his vehicle. "Oh darn, I just had this thing worked on too!"
"It happens," the rotund officer said as he scratched his neck looked back to Asgore with a goofy grin. "Tell you what, if you follow me I'll lead you to a shop to get it fixed. Sound good?"
"Sure thing!" Asgore said as he motioned ahead, "lead the way."
"So, we're making a stop?" Frisk asked a moment later as Asgore pulled out to follow the officer. "Are we going to be late now?"
"We should be fine," Asgore answered. "I bet we'll be in and out of that town in no time."
"What the heck is that supposed to mean!?" Flowey asked with an annoyed snarl as he stared at the sign hanging on the door.
"Will not serve children," Frisk read the sign aloud in response before looking through the cafe's window at the empty seats inside. "I guess it means we can't eat here."
"Well, that's stupid!" Flowey rolled his eyes and huddled down into his pot with a disappointed sigh. "What the heck are we supposed to do now?"
Frisk sighed and she thought back to why they were out here in the first place.
As it turned out, the shop the policemen had led them to was, for all its other virtues, an utter dive. The waiting room seats were torn up, most of the ceiling tiles were missing, and it smelled like oil and some sort of nasty ash. Just thinking back to it made Frisk itch uncomfortably. Still, she would have put up with it if Flowey hadn't started asking about food a few minutes after walking in.
"Oh, are you hungry?" Asgore asked with a smile as he pulled out a wad of bills from his wallet. "Why don't you two go grab something. I'll join up with you in a bit."
Frisk wasn't about to pass up a chance to get out of that place, even if Asgore had to stay behind and talk with the mechanic. So here they were minutes later, standing on the front step of a nice little shop with expressions of disappointment on each of their faces.
"Well, that's off!" Frisk said as she stepped away from the door. "Wanna walk around until Asgore's done?"
"You're doing all the work!" Flowey sighed in frustration before turning to look up at her. "Hey boss, how about letting me out of this stupid pot for once?"
"You're not a prisoner or anything!" Frisk said, her voice rising defensively. "Just, could you hold on till we get to the campsite? With all this pavement, this isn't really a good place for that."
"Fine, you little dictator!" Flowey grumbled almost beneath his breath. "But I better get to move around when we get there. I deserve to spread these roots!"
"Oh, you most definitely do!" Frisk grinned and reached for the button to the crosswalk as she reached the curb. Standing there, it occurred to her that if she turned right she'd eventually find herself back in front of the old Ebott city orphanage.
Frowning, she pushed the thought away and resumed walking, her legs moving with a bit more urgency than they had before. Not a minute and one block later, Frisk reached for the button to the next intersection when Flowey spoke up, pulling her mind away from what she was doing.
"Frisk," Flowey began in a puzzled tone. "What's that?"
"What, the park?" Frisk looked towards where he was pointing, only to narrow her eyes in interest. In the middle of the park stood several tall bronze shapes surrounded by golden flowers.
"Oh," she answered with a shrug. "I think those are new, why?"
"Seems familiar," Flowey muttered in a thoughtful daze before snapping himself back with a shake of the head. "C'mon, I wanna take a closer look."
"Okay, if you say so," Frisk said and crossed to the side of the street with the park.
In truth, calling it a park was more than a little bit generous. It was really more of an empty lot between two streets that the town had decided to pretty up. There were a few picnic tables and some scrawny pine trees, but aside from that, it was almost bare. Or it would've been, had it not been for what was arranged at it's center.
As Frisk approached, she began feeling a sense of unease as she recognized the figures.
They were all statues of children. There were six in total, arranged in a circle, their hands interlocking as they stared blankly off into space with lifeless unseeing eyes.
Regardless of the reason the statues were built, Frisk couldn't help thinking that they were unnerving. In fact, she idly wondered if that was why the park was empty in the middle of the day like this. But, maybe it was just her. The fact that she'd met these kids, but hadn't seen what they looked like until now, didn't exactly make her feel happy.
Gazing downward, she read aloud the words inscribed on a plaque at the bottom of the platform. "To the ones lost in legend, but not in memory. Six lives taken from a community that loved them. May they forever know peace." And, under that, the date of each child's disappearance was carefully listed. They'd all vanished in only a few short years.
Frisk frowned and bit her lip as she stood staring at the plaque. She hadn't thought about it before, but of course, the other kids that fell underground before her had come from here. The town would never have learned what happened to all the children that had disappeared. But clearly, the people living here had decided they needed to be remembered.
It was then, as she stood there looking over the memorial, that she felt Flowey begin to shake and shudder in his pot.
"No," Flowey muttered quietly between ragged breaths. "I don't want to do this!"
"Flowey?" Frisk looked down at her passenger and furrowed her brows in alarm. She wondered if maybe he was having a bad reaction to seeing the memorial, but he wasn't even looking at it. Instead, his wide eyes swept all around him, left, right, and back again. It was as though he was desperate to see in every direction at once.
"It hurts," Flowey hissed out through tightly-gritted teeth. "Chara, it hurts so much!"
*Oh crap.
"What's wrong!?" She demanded, and her heart pounded when she got no response. It was as though Flowey didn't see her. Even when his eyes passed over Frisk it was like he was looking past her. This didn't make any sense to her. What was happening to him, and why was he calling out for Chara of all people!?
"Please Chara, I can't do this!" Flowey clutched tightly at his stem as his voice shifted to Asriel's. "I just want to go home!"
The blood drained from Frisk's face as she was hit by a sickening realization. Here they were in the middle of the town closest to the mountain, surrounded by golden flowers. This wasn't just a park, this was where Asriel had been attacked and fatally wounded.
"Asriel, it's okay!" Frisk said in a panic as she pulled Flowey close. "It's going to be alright!" In her mind that became her mantra, her hymn, the magic words to keep herself together. As she ran she didn't even notice when she began repeating them out loud.
A short time later, she knelt between two buildings in an out-of-the-way spot across the street.
"It's going to be alright!" Frisk repeated again as she sat against the building and rested Flowey on her lap. "Please, please just be alright!" She struggled to keep her voice from quivering as her fingers dug tightly into his pot.
She wasn't sure what was going on inside his head, but hopefully getting him away from there would make it better. Maybe that was stupid, maybe it was wishful thinking and she should be calling Asgore. But, even as these thoughts raced through her mind she felt Flowey stirring.
"Chara?" Flowey asked uncertainly, still speaking in Asriel's voice as he slowly stared up at her. For a moment, she was certain he still didn't see her. But then his eyes seemed to focus in and he blinked in recognition.
"Frisk?" his voice broke, and tears began seeping from his eyes. "Oh god, what did I do!?"
"You didn't do anything," Frisk said with a slow shake of her head. "And, it wasn't your fault, I should have realized where we were."
"Well I didn't," Flowey sniffled and shook his head. "I don't know, it was so dark before, and it all happened so fast!"
"Do, you want to talk about it?"
"No," but although he said that he nodded in agreement.
"I was back there all over again," Flowey began, his stem heaving as he struggled to control his breath. "One second I was with you, and then I was surrounded by all these people. I couldn't see them, but they kept screaming and calling me a murderer!"
"I'm sorry," Frisk muttered, not only because she was sorry it had happened, but also because she wasn't so sure she should've asked. It seemed like the thing to do, but there was so much pain in his voice. But, rather than stopping, Flowey slowly shook his head and continued.
"That's when I realized I couldn't kill them, I think," Flowey said with a sniffle before taking a deep breath. "None of it felt real before then. The humans were just numbers, kill six and we're all free! It was easy to say that. But, once I saw they were just scared people I just couldn't anymore."
"That's not a bad thing," Frisk offered quietly. "You weren't wrong for wanting to spare them."
"I know that now," Flowey said with a shudder. "But, Chara was so mad! She kept screaming in my head, telling me I was a traitor, trying to force me. I wanted to go home, but she wouldn't let me!"
*Yeah, I was kind of a piece of work back then.
"And then," Flowey paused, the words catching in his throat as his breath came faster and faster "there was this loud noise, and something bit into me!"
Frisk clasped her hand around her open mouth in shock. He'd been shot. Someone in that crowd, without knowing what was going on, aimed a barrel at him and fired. She knew that to them it had to have looked bad. She even understood that they were scared. But right then, she couldn't help hating whoever pulled that trigger.
"I still can't understand it," Flowey said as he struggled to hold back his tears. "Why did so many bad things have to happen? Why did we both have to be such idiots!?"
Without thinking, Frisk threw her arms around Flowey and drew him tight against her. She would not have done this at any other time, wouldn't even have considered it. But, right then and there, she wasn't sure it was possible to do anything else.
"W, what are you doing?" Flowey asked as he stiffened in alarm.
"I'm hugging you," Frisk answered almost in a whisper.
"Why?!" Flowey sobbed in confusion and went limp in her arms. "Why are you always being so nice to me!?"
Suddenly, Frisk was back in the empty home she grew up in, staring up at the closed front door and wishing her mother would walk through it. Then she was in her room, looking down through the window and hoping she would see a familiar car coming down the street. Finally, she leaned into the cool iron gates of the orphanage. Her forehead pressing against the rods as droplets of rain began to fall from oppressive gray skies.
"Momma," Frisk muttered to herself. "Don't you know I'm right here waiting for you, momma?" There was no answer, save for the echoing rumble of thunder in the far-off distant sky.
"I've been good!" she protested weakly. "I've done everything the grownups asked. I do all of my chores, I eat my vegetables, and I really try to get along with the other kids. But I don't think they like me much." Slowly, her gaze sank down until she stared at the pavement. She stayed there waiting patiently for some sort of sign, for someone to tell her that she'd indeed been good. She kept waiting.
"You're coming to get me, right?" the words were scarcely more than a breath. "I don't know what I did to make you so angry, but I won't do it again!"
She waited again, yet there was still no answer.
"Why?" Frisk asked with a sob as tears mixed with the rain. "Why can't we just be a family again?"
Standing in the rain, she waited for an answer as her chest began to heave. She waited for someone to tell her it was okay, and take her someplace where it was warm and safe. She waited, while wordlessly crying out for somebody to make it all okay.
But nobody came.
"Because I get it," tears ran down Frisk's face as she held Flowey tight. "And, nobody should have to go through this alone!" The words were not enough, and yet somehow it seemed like they were entirely too much at the same time. Opening her mouth, she searched for something better to say but closed it a moment later upon finding nothing.
There was so much she wanted to tell him. That it was all okay, that they were so alike in some ways, and she understood what he was going through. But she didn't know how to say any of it right. All she could do was sit there and comfort him as their tears intermingled, and hope that it would somehow be enough. That somehow, that alone would get her feelings across.
As she felt Flowey grab hold of her arm and squeeze, she became a little more confident that it would.