HAHAHAHA I'M SORRY. I sort of left this fic behind and waffled with myself on whether or not to finish it. But you know who loses most when I don't finish a fic? Me. I don't get to tell my story, I lose my conviction, I never get the chance to TRY. I haven't finished many fics before (maybe two plus one original novel that haha is sitting in a binder on my bedside table waiting for me to edit it) and I'm not doing anyone any use by leaving a story unfinished.
So I'm going to try HARD to wrap this baby up in a pretty little bow with the original idea I had in mind. That means we have several chapters left, maybe even up to 10 considering how I write, but dammit I'm going to try.
My 100 prompt Balcifer fic will be sporadically updated here and there, for those of you reading that, so don't lose heart there either. OKAY LET'S CONTINUE I'M SORRY.
Lu woke with a jolt from some far off sound, but suddenly staring at only a slightly familiar ceiling gave him pause. It took a few seconds to recognize Balthazar's loft and even a bit longer to realize he was in bed by himself. That's around the point he felt the light weight of Cocoa on his chest. The kitten was curled into a ball, snoring lightly. The other sound – the one that actually woke him up – finally registered through the background noise with the smell that came with it.
Someone was cooking. The sound of something frying on a skillet was unmistakable. So that's where his little family went.
"What would you like to drink, darling?" came Balthazar's voice from the kitchen, but he was too hushed to be speaking to him. "I have just about everything, I think."
He heard his little girl humming, making a show of considering the offer. "Chocolate milk?" Lu never let her have chocolate this early, but Balthazar-
"Yep. Hold on."
Lu smiled to himself, letting his head fall back on the pillow as he heard more shuffling around the kitchen and the unmistakable sound of a refrigerator opening. After a few minutes, he heard Balthazar's soft voice say, "Here you are, little one," and that was it. They were, for once, together in silence... Lu promptly frowned and gently removed Cocoa. The kitten mewled lowly but took up snuggling into his still warm pillow, while Lu quietly got out of bed.
To be completely honest, he was a bit worried how Lily was doing after the horrible day before. All of the attention and questions and small mentions of her mother had to be more than a little jarring, making Lu almost too relieved when she finally fell asleep on them. Through all the crap yesterday, she looked up at him constantly with eyes full of questions, but was never able to voice many of them due to all of the people poking back at her. There would likely be a ton of questions today, but what could he tell her? Her mother was trying to separate them? The woman might be a bitch, but he definitely didn't want her to be painted that way in Lily's eyes. Ruby was still her mother. Fuck if it wasn't all messed up.
But if Balthazar and Lily weren't talking, then she wasn't doing well. At least Lu himself felt more rejuvenated from sleeping so that he could fully support his baby girl no matter what happened with Ruby and DCFS. Though, most of him knew it wasn't the sleep that had him feeling stronger.
A glance to the clock told him it was eight in the morning – he was very thankful to have the foresight yesterday to call in to work and take off some odd days and, thankfully, his boss understood – before quietly making his way to the kitchen. He turned the corner just as a plate of food was placed in front of his daughter, and she giggled.
Balthazar smirked at her, not even noticing Lu was there at all. He was in different clothes now, damp hair indicating he had a shower at some point, but still looked too tired to have really slept through the night. A stab of shame for coming over here so late in a panic and rage shocked through Lu's chest. Maybe they were kind of serious now, but bothering him with all of this was stupid... even if he had needed him so badly last night. "What?" The thought fled when the blonde chuckled and knelt down to the girl's level.
"It's a face," Lily giggled again, a bit of herself seeming to come back.
Balthazar scoffed. "Your dad doesn't make faces with your food? I'll have to teach him how."
"Daddy says to not play with food, Balthazar," she laughed, as Lu observed the fried eggs for eyes and the bacon making a lopsided smile, some jelly almost looking like a spiked tongue.
"Well that's where me and Lu will have to agree to disagree," the blonde said, almost in a lecturing tone. "Food should absolutely be played with. Stab his eyes out, little one." She laughed again as the older man stood, placing a light kiss to the top of her head. The whole ordeal was such a small thing, but Lu felt himself falling in love all over again.
As Balthazar went back to the stove, Lily made good on the command and quickly stabbed at the egg yolk with her fork, a little grin playing across her face that Lu was only too thankful to see. That's when she finally noticed him. "Daddy!"
He could see the blonde turn to him, but Balthazar suddenly wasn't the center of his focus right now. Lu managed to paint a small smile on his face before moving over to the girl. "Morning, baby," he greeted her, putting a kiss on the same spot of her hair.
"Morning," she replied with a big smile of her own. "Balthazar played with my food."
"Tattletale," Balthazar chuckled, now with his back to them as he focused on cooking.
It was like nothing had changed from before. Lu felt like he could keep this moment forever if it meant never moving forward to whatever dread tomorrow brought with it, just like when he knew that he and Balthazar wouldn't last. But it was so much more devastating this time. He tried to keep his thoughts from straying that far, though. Balthazar had put Lily in a good mood somehow, and he wasn't about to ruin it. "Stabbed his eyes out, I see."
"That's the weak spots, daddy."
He couldn't help a laugh at that. "Right. Just eat before it gets cold."
"Mhmm!" she answered, immediately going for the bacon.
With Lily seeming happy and content for the moment, he walked the few steps it took to lean against the counter as his lover worked over the stove. "Thank you," he said quietly, honestly, trying like Hell to put as much sincerity into it as possible.
But Balthazar didn't even look to him. Just smiled and said, "Don't thank me, love. I didn't do anything you wouldn't have."
There was a lot Lu felt like he could say in contrary to that, and it just made him feel worse. "Look..." He dropped his voice, glancing to Lily long enough to confirm that her attention was sufficiently taken. "I'm sorry I came over here last night like that. Screaming at you, getting you wrapped up into all of this, everything. I'm sorry-"
"Luce." The voice is stern, forcing Lu to look up to the hard, almost hurt face. "I was about to go out there and spend the whole night looking for you. What makes you think that seeing you at my door was anything but a relief?"
At that, he didn't know what to say. He glanced to Lily, noting how cheerful she looked to just eat breakfast of all things. Maybe coming here was the best option for her, too. He let out a held breath and gently reached over to grip Balthazar's arm. "Thank you."
"I love you, too," the blonde replied softly, gently leaning over to place a kiss on his cheek. "I hope you like your eggs sunny side up, though. I've already started on them."
A little smile bloomed across Lu's face. Instead of giving an answer, he leaned over until his head rested against Balthazar's shoulder as he watched Lily eating. Maybe inconvenient, but his lover made no complaints, so he didn't bother to move until his food was done.
It was after he and Lily got back to their apartment that Lu decided to maybe turn his phone back on. He didn't want a ringtone interrupting any of the meetings yesterday, but apparently everyone began to freak out a little once he was officially declared missing by the family.
He quickly found dozens of texts and several missed calls, not the least of which were Balthazar's. (His heart fell when he read that his lover only innocently wanted to meet him for dinner just twenty-four hours ago.) It looked like Gabriel and Castiel tried quite a number of times to reach him the night before, too. Even Michael, who usually stayed more or less out of the loop, had called twice. At some point during the night or the morning, Balthazar must have told someone that they were safe and accounted for considering the time stamp on all of his texts and calls.
As much as Lu didn't want to, he needed to tell someone else what was going on, even if it was to just keep the burden off of Balthazar. He didn't deserve all of his messes. Castiel was immediately put aside in favor of his two brothers. It was no doubt in anyone's mind that he and Gabriel were close, but nothing came quite to par as the bond he shared with his twin.
Michael picked up on the first ring. "Oh thank God, Lu! Never do that again! Shit! We didn't know where the hell you two were!"
Really, he should have expected this sort of greeting from any of them. "It's not like I don't keep to myself for days at a time, Mike."
"Gabriel said your boyfriend went to his freaking place, scared to death, trying to find you! So, yeah! I'm rightfully pissed off!" Balthazar personally went to Gabriel? God, he really had been scared. "What in the hell was going on? Is Lily okay?"
"She's fine," Lu pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry, Michael. I am, really. I should have told someone. It was just all... happening so fast. And Balthazar started calling so I turned off my phone... I should have just told him. I'm sorry, man."
"What happened?" His brother didn't sound as angry as he did worried anymore.
Lu sighed and leaned back until he was laying down on his bed. Lily, thankfully, was in the living room, catching up on all the TV she missed yesterday. "DCFS called. They wanted to meet with me and Lily."
"DC-... Child Services? Why in- Who the fuck called Child Services on you?"
"Ruby. She made up a lot of lies, but mostly claimed that I wasn't letting her see Lily." Saying the story this time was a big change from last night. Now he was just tired, waiting for whatever was going to happen to wash over him so he could fight it while he knew what it was. Right now, there wasn't much at all he could do... That and having been around Balthazar made him feel just that much better about the world. The blonde even offered – nearly demanded – that the two of them stay longer with him, but Lu couldn't do that. As much as he wanted to, Balthazar had already done far too much for them.
It felt strange pushing his lover away as if he suddenly wasn't family, but it was for the best right now.
"That fucking slut!" His thoughts derailed thanks to his brother cursing a blue streak. "I can't believe she would- Oh my God! If I ever see that bitch again-!"
"Somehow, I still find that unlikely." Somehow.
"Jesus Christ," Michael sighed on the other line, "You sure Lily's all right? She's not freaked out by all that? Did you even see Ruby?"
"Lily's fine," he said again, moving his head up just enough to see the crack in his door, "She was kind of put off after all of the questions and stuff, but Balthazar saw to that. She's okay. Ruby, though- No, we didn't see her."
"God, Lucifer. If you don't end up marrying Balthazar, I swear I'll wring your neck." That had Lu smiling wide. "At least she looks like an idiot. Now she has the whole damn state against her."
… And there went Lu's grin. "It's not over yet, Mike. The DNA testing doesn't come back until tomorrow."
There was a predictable silence on the phone. Other than Balthazar, Michael was the only one that knew of Lu's theory that Lily might not even be his flesh and blood, no matter who's name was on the birth certificate. "... Christ, Lu... I-... But it shouldn't matter either way, right? I mean, you've raised her all these years like she's yours. They can't take that."
Lu just stared up at the ceiling, finally able to face the God awful possibility that he's tried to ignore for the last six years. "I think we're going to get to find out..."
"Fuck that. Did you call Sam?"
"Talked to him a little yesterday about a lawyer, but I haven't called back."
"Do it. Tell him the truth. Whatever the fucker he finds costs, I'll pitch in."
Lu quickly sat up. "Mike, no-"
"Don't no me, dammit. I'll be damned if I see that bitch take Lily away. This is the worst time to not ask for help, Lu. Just like last night. Look, don't worry about money right now. We'll all handle this together, okay?"
Lu looked back up to the door again, faintly hearing cartoons playing down the hall and tried to imagine his apartment in silence. "... Okay."
"Are you still with Balthazar?"
"No." It almost felt like the wrong answer, like he should have never left. "We just got back from his place."
His brother seemed to mull over that for a minute before deciding the reply was acceptable. "All right... Lu, listen, about this DNA crap, just try not to worry about it, okay? It won't make any difference."
"I'm scared," he admitted, a thought he only lightly touched on with his lover, "Ruby wants her too suddenly and she doesn't want me in the picture at all. I don't like it."
"It won't matter. She's not getting her."
Michael said it so simply, like it was the only truth in the world...
Lu was quick to wrap up the conversation. He felt better talking to his brother, he did, but the anger and the reckless optimism was too much energy for him right now. If he could just curl up beside Balthazar for the rest of the day, that would be great.
After hanging up, he stood and went back into the living room, sitting beside Lily on the sofa to watch her cartoons with her. It was something he did every now and then, so the girl didn't think it strange and just snuggled up to him instead... Michael was full of shit. That test mattered more than he could imagine.
Lu ran his fingers through his little girl's hair and watched her intent stare, already too wise for her age.
What would she think?
Michael is filling up the swear jar today, folks.
I'm sorry this is so short after my ridiculous hiatus, but I had to put up something. Thank you for all for continuing to read and support this fic.