Just a few short hours later Anya began to stir. No longer feeling Loki's body next to her, she began to feel blindly around the bed, reaching out to where she thought he may be. When she felt nothing she quickly sat up, prying her eyes open and searching around the room for any sign of her fiance. Her attention was quickly drawn by the lights she could see beyond the curtains, the was something abnormal outside. She quickly rose from the bed and pushed the curtains aside so that she could have a clear view out to the city. Her breathing stopped immediately. She saw the rainbow bridge flashing wildly, at the end she saw observatory spinning as if it were out of control and from it shone the light of the Bifrost, stronger and brighter than she had ever seen. Something was wrong, and she knew it was Loki's doing. Quickly she dressed herself in the first clothes she could find, only making herself just about decent before she rushed out of the room, racing through the palace and sprinting out of the city towards the rainbow bridge. She made it in minutes but just as she was about to step onto the bridge there was an explosion of light. Anya turned away to shield her eyes and only looked back when she felt the force of the blast pass her. The sound that had come with the explosion was deafening but once it had settled there was silence. Anya stood still in shock, not daring to step out onto the bridge, not wanting to see the carnage that had been left behind. She just stood frozen in place, almost as if she believed that if she didn't move then nothing bad could have happened. But of course she knew that wasn't the truth. The moments that passed felt like an eternity, but soon she saw two figures approaching. Her heart skipped a beat and then soared at the thought that her love had not been injured in the blast. But then it immediately sank to her stomach as she realised that the figure was shorter and stouter than Loki. Slowly Thor and the All Father became clear. The only things Anya felt next were the ground beneath her knees and the tears streaming down her face. She realised that the howls that sounded like the cries of a distant animal were coming from her own lungs and she clutched at her chest feeling like her heart may stop at any moment. The men did not dare speak, neither knowing what to say. It was clear that Anya had known that Loki had been at the end of the bridge and they could offer no words of solace, so they simply let her sob. Anya wasn't sure how long she had stayed there crying but she felt Thor lift her to her feet and support her as they returned to the palace.
Soon she was back in her chambers with young Solveig doing everything she could to make Anya feel even a little better. Solveig's heart broke for her mistress, a lady who she had come to consider somewhat of a friend. She would have never believed that she would see such a strong women in such a broken state, but then Solveig was one of the few people who knew the true nature of Loki and Anya's relationship, she had seen how truly in love they were. She had also seen what a good man Prince Loki really was when you knew him personally and the young maid had shed a few tears for the prince herself.
Fandral had come to Anya's side as soon as he had heard the news. He held her as she sobbed into his chest, stroking her hair and cooing softly, wishing that there was anything he could do to make her pain go away. When sleep finally overtook her he slipped from the bed but only moved to a nearby chair and spent the night by her side, not daring to leave her alone for even a minute. When Anya awoke her eyes were red and swollen but she had no more tears to cry. She smiled softly to herself when she saw Fandral snoring in the chair by her side, grateful that she had such a friend at a time like this. She woke him gently and he seemed relieved to see that she was no longer weeping, but the sadness still lingered in her eyes. She had asked if he would walk with her in the grounds, and he had eagerly agreed, glad that she was choosing to take herself outside. He knew that many people would have shut themselves away in her situation, but then again she was not like many people. They walked side by side in silence for the most part. Fandral observed how almost everyone they passed looked at Anya with the same look, first shock, then pity, but Anya did not seem to notice them. She walked almost aimlessly and Fandral simply followed wherever she went. Soon she was in the same place she had been just hours ago, at the end of the rainbow bridge. She looked out at it in silence her eyes glazed over and Fandral wondered what she was thinking of. He watched on waiting for her to speak. Anya saw Heimdall at the end of the bridge, where the observatory had stood just yesterday, and she remembered how peaceful she had felt with him in amongst all the chaos of Loki's short reign. And so without saying a word she stepped onto the bridge and began to walk towards him. Still Fandral followed behind her in silence, letting her choose the best actions for her healing. When they reached the far end Anya sat by the gatekeeper's feet and dangled her legs over the edge of the shattered bridge. She sat in silence with her eyes closed for a long while, listening to the calming sounds of the waves rolling beneath her and feeling the soothing breeze on her face. When she opened her eyes a tear slipped out and she let it roll down her cheek as she looked out into the abyss below her. "Do you think there is anyone out there who truly understands love?" She asked to no one in particular.
After a moment Fandral answered her question. "If there is I would like to meet them."
"And I too." Anya chuckled softly. "I would ask them why our hearts never agree with our minds, for surely our minds know what is best for us."
"I would disagree, Anya." Fandral offered. "I have always known the heart to choose the right path. Even when it may seem wrong."
"Heimdall?" She asked the silent gatekeeper, not expecting him to actually reply, she was shocked when he did.
"I believe Fandral is right, Anya." He said, not taking his gaze from the horizon. "One should never ignore the pull of the heart."
Anya smiled softly to herself and her heart skipped a few beats when she thought of the one she loved. She reached a hand up towards her chest and pulled on the chain that lay around her neck, untucking it from her dress and taking the ring that sat on it tightly in her hand. She would not fight the pull of her heart.
Fandral distracted her from her thoughts as he knelt next to her. She did not look at him but she listened to his words. "Anya," he started tentatively. "Tonight there is to be a feast, to celebrate Thor's return." She huffed a small laugh at the idea, of course they would celebrate Thor at a time like this. "It will only be a small affair, just a handful of nobles, but if you do not wish to attend then I…"
She looked up to him with a soft gaze and a small smile and cut him off. "Fandral, how could I miss a feast?"
And so that evening she found herself seated at the table barely registering the laugher booming around her. She did not engage for most of the night, only occasionally sharing small smiles with those she considered friends when they tried to include her in the conversations, but she was in no mood to join their celebrations. It seemed Thor wasn't either and when he rose from the table Anya followed him, away from the crowd, to the edge of the room. When it got slightly quieter she called out to him. He turned and sighed "Anya." Stepping forward he took her in a tight embrace, she held on to him just as tightly. Neither of them spoke as they stayed like that for a long while. Anya realised that this was the closest she had ever been to the prince and chuckled softly.
"What is it?" He asked as he stepped away from her.
"Did you know that before all this you and I were betrothed?" She smiled softly and he chuckled too. "We were to strengthen the bond between our two realms."
"If it is any consolation, Anya I believe you would have made a fine Queen." He offered.
She hummed in agreement but said. "But I would not have made a fine wife for you. I'm sure your mortal is much better suited to you." At the mention of the lady Thor's face dropped and a sadness overtook him again. Anya reached out her hand and squeezed his arm softly. "I am sure you will see her again Thor."
After a moment he looked deep into her eyes and she saw the hope that showed he believed her. "I wish I could say the same to you." He said solemnly.
Anya reached up and took the ring on the chain in her hand, holding it close to her heart. "He is alive in my heart. As long as I remember that he will always be with me." Thor nodded softly and was just about to turn and walk away when Anya stopped him. "I must apologise Thor. I can't help but feel responsible for all this."
Thor's gaze dropped to the ground as he replied. "My brother's actions were that of his own, Anya, do not burden yourself with them."
"I could have done something though…" She trailed off.
"No one can stop the will of fate." Thor answered wisely, before bowing his head slightly and turning away from Anya.
She watched him go in silence and soon felt a presence alongside her watching him too.
"Thor has learnt much while he was on Midgard." The Queen spoke softly. "Perhaps we ought to be thanking you." Anya started trying to apologise for all that had taken place because of her but Frigga cut her off. "What is done cannot be undone, my dear. Let us be thankful for what we still have." Anya felt a pang in her stomach as she thought of all she had lost and how little she still had. At least she could be glad of the friendships she had on Asgard, and the fact that no one seemed to hold her responsible for a plan that they all knew she must have played a part in. The women watched on as Thor spoke with the All Father and Anya could no longer hold in the burning question that was on her mind. "The All Father has done many horrific things during his reign." She stated.
"A King must make sacrifices for the good of his people." Frigga immediately jumped to his defence.
Anya smirked at the fact that the queen was already answering her question without it even being asked. "And yet you still love him?"
"Unconditionally." Frigga stated plainly. "That is the vow we made to one another all those years ago. I may not always agree with him as king but I will always love him as my husband."
"I wish I had had chance to take that vow." Anya said wistfully, clutching at the chain around her neck.
"I believe you did take it, Anya." The Queen spoke softly, leaving Anya's side abruptly and returning to the table.
Anya continued to stare into the distance as she thought of the man who would have been her husband. Frigga was right, they were never officially married but their souls were bonded, and they would stay that way for as long as Anya lived. But soon a sadness overtook her, as the laughter came into her ears and she was reminded of the last time she was at a feast with him, the last time she walked the gardens with him, the last time she trained with him. Anya knew in that moment that if she were to heal she could not stay here in Asgard. As much as she would miss her friends and the new life she had found, she had to return home, to her people. After Thor had finished speaking with him Anya slowly approached the All Father.
"Lady Anya. I am sorry." He spoke as she approached. He did not elaborate. Leaving Anya to wonder about which part of her stay in Asgard he was sorry for. But she did not ask. Instead she spoke. "I think it would be best if I were to return home."
"Yes." He agreed. "We will find a way." That was the end of their conversation. Neither had anything more to say to the other and so Anya left the All Father but she did not return to the celebrations. She made her way to a balcony that overlooked the rainbow bridge and stared out into the abyss. She smirked to herself as she thought of what might have been if the events of that evening had gone differently. She wondered how the past days would have played out if he had returned with his brother. But he had not, and there was no use wondering of what could have been. Anya had to move forward with what she had now. But still her heart fluttered as she thought of the last time he had held her. She believed that was when they had taken their unspoken vows. As she reminisced she unclasped the chain from her neck and slide the ring from it. She placed on her left had and held it to the sky, just like she had when he had first put it on her. As she looked out to the horizon her heart soared with love and, if she had believed in that sort of thing, she would have sworn that she still felt Loki's spirit somewhere out there.
A/N- I'm sorry! But hey, you know, and I know, but Anya just doesn't know...yet. There may be a bit of a wait before the next chapter as we move into the next phase of the Thor storyline, I just need to get my ideas solidified before I start writing, but it shouldn't be long!