Lullaby
By Alaricnomad
Chapter Twenty: Heart
Lucas's eyes flew open, and his mouth quite literally dropped open as he stared incredulously at his girlfriend. Peyton watched with amusement as his eyes widened comically, brows shooting to nearly his forehead. She smirked, reaching out a hand to close his unhinged jaw. "Careful, baby. You never know what you might catch that way."
He blinked, staring at her for awhile for in stunned silence before his look shifted into something else. There was a mixture of shock and a little fear, but she was surprised to find as well interest, anticipation, happiness, and a hint of consideration. "You want another baby," he repeated slowly, not sure if he had heard her right. She nodded, and he grinned brightly.
She caressed his cheek. "I'm not talking about now, Luke. I'm talking about someday."
An even bigger surprise was his look of disappointment. "Oh," he nodded his head, and sighed, "I guess I didn't think that one through."
"No. Me either. I mean, the thought's passed through my mind about a hundred times since last summer. But reality kind of pushes it back again." She leaned over to face him, resting a hand against his chest. "I'm sorry, Lucas. I didn't mean for it to come out like that. That part just sort of blurted out."
"I'll say."
She rolled her eyes at him. "What I meant is…I know how much you've been afraid of losing me lately. I just…I want everything with you: a family, a future, all of it. Someday. And we can wait for it, 'cause I'm not going anywhere, babe."
His smile, she was sure, was bright as the sun itself. "Whoa…"
She laughed softly. She was pretty surprised herself at, of course, herself. "Yeah. I'm…I'm not afraid anymore, Luke, and it feels great."
"It does feel pretty good, doesn't it?" He followed up the rhetorical comment with a soft kiss. "Mom's right. We will get that feeling back. The one we had when we knew Will was coming. God, Peyt," he whispered with awe, lost in his memory, "I remember that. I never thought I could ever feel so much love for a person that barely even existed yet. I know you felt it too. Knowing that feeling of finally having a family, of having someone who would love you unconditionally, just for being you. It's amazing, isn't it?"
She cupped his jaw, drawing his mouth back to hers in a warm, lingering contact. "It'll be amazing."
"Mmm. It will be." He rubbed his nose against hers, smiling softly. "I love you."
"I love you too." She hesitated a moment, stroking her fingers against his bare chest. "Luke, tell me something."
"Tell you what, honey?"
"There was something Brooke said today. Tell me we don't have anything to be ashamed of. That I don't have anything to be ashamed of. Making love to me that night wasn't a mistake. Our son wasn't a mistake."
He wrapped his arms around her, whispering fervently into her hair. "Never. Loving you, making William…the best things I have done with my life." He brushed a kiss against her temple. "And you are that life now. Always."
----
Over the next few days, alone time was rare for the couple. They took a reprieve the next chance they had; returning to the place where it had all began. The beach was empty that evening when Lucas and Peyton finally reached their destination.
They sat side-by-side on the sand and Lucas reached out to his girlfriend, snaking an arm around her waist to pull her into his lap. She giggled (Lucas smirked; he'd actually witnessed Peyton Sawyer giggling) and nestled back against him, resting her head against the crook of his neck.
"You talked to Nathan and Haley today, didn't you?" she asked him quietly.
"Yeah."
"How'd it go?"
Lucas huffed out a hefty breath. "Okay. Haley understood and Nate said we were cool, but I think it'll be a little while before he's comfortable with me again."
"I'm sorry, Luke." She kissed his cheek. "It'll get better."
"I know." He reiterated her kiss.
He turned his gaze, felt the exhaustion of the day setting in on him, and he took in the sight of sun setting over the horizon. The fiery star shot the sky through with the warm glow of vermillion, and over the serene blue of the water, it seemed as if in that moment, the two elements met and kissed, lingering together in the short time left before twilight.
He thought back to the amateur poetry, alongside his developing novel, he had written in the past few months, mostly about Peyton. The heat of her in his heart and soul and head was overwhelming, and he needed to drain out the words before they imploded upon him. A dozen litanies later about gold and sunlight and emerald eyes left an odd, poetic beat to his conscious.
His lips curled into a slight smile as he hummed softly in thought. At sunset over the ocean, fire took water to wife, and he kissed his new bride with lingering affection before the opaque night obscured them from sight. And the newlyweds took their rest in the wake of the fading daytime.
"Peyt?"
"Hmm?"
"Will you marry me?"
He saw her smile, tilting her head toward him. "Ask me again in a couple years."
He couldn't help himself from smiling as well. "Okay."
It wasn't long before they found themselves drawn to the gently-lapping waters of the bay set out before them, stripping off clothes down to their birthday suits in daring fashion as they raced off toward the dusk.
Splashing among the waves, their eyes met again across the water and that magnetic pull was back again. There was no way he could resist getting closer to her.
He slowly brought his hands up to frame her face, and leaned down. The resulting kiss was soft, her eyes fluttering closed as his lips grazed over hers, applying the lightest bit of pressure as she responded, twining her arms around his neck in a way that consequently brought her closer to him. He pulled back slightly, his nose brushing against hers as he smiled.
Watching her eyes, he brought a hand from her face and placed it carefully on the small of her back, gliding his fingers up her spine to rest at her neck, sending sensual shivers in his wake as he cupped the back of her head, tangling his fingers through her hair. She brought her own hands up to touch him, tracing the musculature of his arms and the blades of his shoulders, palms lying flat against his back to feel slick skin cool and wet from the water.
He kissed her- or she kissed him, she wasn't certain who started it- but suddenly there was nothing but mouth and cheek and skin and hands…gentle and warm and passionate. They broke apart only as the need for air became an issue, and Peyton watched him withdraw through hooded eyes, her vision full of nothing but the hazy blue of his eyes, deep and penetrating as the dark oceans around them.
She shuddered for breath, trembled against him and he tightened his arms around her. His lips whispered a kiss against the nape of her neck, and his hands were incredibly gentle as he slowly mapped her body. Luke thrilled in touching her. She was lean and lithe, so very graceful, all silken skin and slender curves.
She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
With a mischievous grin, she playfully pushed at his shoulders, breaking out of his arms. The chase was on, the two of them gliding effortlessly through the water as their bodies streamlined along the tide. Tossed about between laughter and splashes, she managed to evade him one last time, shoving him under before heading to the shallows. He resurfaced a few moments later, blonde hair stuck to his face. He sputtered for air as he blinked, attempting to move the sopping mess out of his eyes.
With a warm smile, Peyton accomplished the task for him, drawing his head down for a kiss as he wrapped his hands around her hips, lifting her up toward him. Her legs slung around his waist, and he balanced her against him, rather proud of his double-tasking as they continued to devour each other, all the while as he stumbled out of the water. They hit down onto the sand, Lucas managing to take the brunt of the impact as she fell overtop of him. He rolled her beneath him, ignoring the sentiment sticking their wet skin as their bodies entwined together.
He peppered kisses down her neck and shoulder, running his hands down her sides, "You are so beautiful."
She smiled, tilting back her head to grant him better access, "Are we really going to do this here?"
She felt his lips lift into a smile against her skin, "You have any better ideas?"
"It'll be messy," she replied wryly, "Knowing us, anyway." They weren't exactly known for lacking passion for one another. Only outside parties providing unneeded complications.
"Do you care?" he kissed her.
"Mmm," she moaned, her gaze mischievous as they stared into his, "Not really."
"Good."
His kiss was anything but mild or chaste. She opened to the insistent press of his tongue, succumbed to him. Sand was coarse, wet and cold against her back, but she didn't care, and then she no longer noticed as he swept over her, his mouth at her throat hot as a brand, his hands lost between them.
A wild, strange heat coiled in her belly, stoked by his touch and fueled by the desire smoldering in his eyes. She had known those eyes forever, seen every look, every emotion they had to reveal, and every pain. She knew their fire, their determination, their sorrow, their pride, and their strength.
But on this night, they burned with a different fire, a familiar, lustful heat that never failed to thrill her. It was a gaze full of love and desire dominating over everything else; all for her, only for her. As his mouth descended onto hers once again, all coherent thought flew out the proverbial window. Emotion and sensation met and clashed; collided to join together in a fire that threatened to overwhelm her. His heat enveloped her, embraced her just as he did.
He touched her in ways only he could, in places no other man ever had: heart and body. His touch was simultaneously demanding and gentle; tender in a way she had always imagined he would be. Strong and tender, passionate and gentle, he was all the things she had ever known him to be. The familiarity of him was soothing, knowing his body as well as she did.
Two bodies joined, their hearts pounded with united rhythm. For a single, frozen moment, they went still, staring into each other's eyes as they took in the feeling of together in every way. Slender arms twined around his neck, legs around his hips, and she welcomed him into her body. The sensation of him inside of her besieged her heart, her thoughts, her body, as they began to move again. In this moment, as bodies became one, two hearts, two souls, submerged together as well.
Something archaic, something primal, in an ancient dance existing since the dawn of time, a rhythm guided by instinct, a mating driven by things they could never say. Passion, desire, lust, he was all those personified. Erasing any trace of doubt, insecurity, and questions from her head, thrown aside, tossed aside until there was nothing left but him, every sense overwhelmed and filled with him.
Once upon a time, he had been untouchable, unreachable, all out of fear for what they felt for each other and now here he was, with her in every way. His hands curled around hers, anchoring them both as he moved inside her. The faraway look his eyes sometimes held disappeared and he was there with her, all of him. She writhed beneath him, cried his name again and again, as their world collapsed out from under them, sending them flying.
Soul-shaking ecstasy, gravity defying as they crossed the line between fall and flight, came without warning, poignant and overwhelming. His body shuddered and her name spilled from his lips raw and broken, utter oblivion there to meet them as they collapsed together in an entanglement of intertwined limbs and spent passions.
Peyton laid her head upon his shoulder, smiling softly as she pressed her ear against his chest to listen to the thundering of his heart, "Good workout?"
"You have no idea," he dropped a kiss to the top of her head, wrapping her into his embrace.
"I might." She nestled closer to him, kissing his chest, "Now," she said wryly. "What is better than that?"
Lucas chuckled, "I can't think of anything."
"Honestly, I can't think at all."
He smiled, nuzzling against her neck, "That's usually a good sign."
"Mmm, always," she kissed him softly, stroking his cheek, feeling him respond as his mouth was a warm, gentle press against hers. When he moved to deepen the kiss, she reluctantly rolled away from him, meeting his protesting frown with a regretful sigh, "We need to get back."
Lucas groaned, rubbing a hand over his face, "Can't we just ignore the whole curfew issue?"
"After all the leeway she's given us, the last thing I want is to get on Karen's bad side."
"Fine," he huffed out a sigh and brushed sand away from his thighs. "Peyt…"
"Hmm?"
He cupped her cheek, drawing her mouth to his in a soft kiss, "I love you," another soft peck, "And you have no idea how hard it is not to touch you right now."
She scoffed. "I can feel how hard it is for you. But we really need to be going. Don't think I'd fall for that distraction tactic."
"It was worth a shot."
----
It was late February, six months to the day William Scott had passed. Arms around each other, Lucas and Peyton walked languidly through the cemetery, at peace for the first time since they had begun making the monthly trip to their son's grave.
The skies overhead were a cold, steel gray, overcastting the sun's warm touch. Lucas knelt beside the cold stone of his son's grave, so lost in his memories, he didn't pay any attention to the dismal cold and damp around him, wrapping around him like a blanket capable of chilling him to the bone. Instead, he chose to bask in his inward warmth, which made all the difference. The months had changed him a little, his handsome face clean-shaven and peaceful, his hair cut neatly short, his blue dress shirt offsetting his twinkling eyes.
He was sans his favorite leather jacket, which was wrapped around the woman beside him, beautiful in an emerald green dress, hair growing out past her shoulders and recovering their trademark curls. Lucas had taken her to dinner earlier that evening before their planned visit, both of them deciding this particular anniversary was better spent in memory rather than mourning.
"Of all nature's gifts to the human race," Lucas whispered softly, reverence to the quote he had chosen for the gravestone, "What is sweeter to man than his children?"
"Luke." A pair of green eyes peered down at him curiously. The same eyes that captivated him, saved him, loved him. She was his girlfriend, his lover, the holder of his heart, his future wife and mother of his children. "You okay?"
Lucas smiled up at her softly, as her hand wrapped around his own, soft and small. He gripped her hand warmly, tracing his finger carefully over the words engraved in the headstone. "Yeah, I'm okay." He stood up, offering Peyton his arm with a last glance at the flowers they had laid out at their feet. It was only around seven, and he wondered idly if walking the beach would be a good way to end the evening.
He gently kissed her temple. "We're okay."
----
This, my lovely readers, is, regrettably, the last chapter of Lullaby. I'll follow it up with an epilogue sooner or later. I just want you to know I appreciate all reviews and feedback, and I thank you for joining me on this ride through what's proven to be my most popular fic yet.
See you soon,
Nomad