Chapter Twenty-One

Hyde hung the phone up and walked down into the lounge.

"Jackie you only painted your nails 6 days ago, why are you doing them again?" he asked as he picked up the TV guide.

Jackie rolled her eyes. "Because Steven, they were red for Christmas. I'm wearing a pink dress for New Year's so I want them pink"

"If that bottle falls and gets all over my carpet I'm gonna be really fucked off y'know" he grumbled.

"Whatever. Anyway, tell me, how'd it go with Eric? What did he say? Was he mad? Did he cry?" Jackie said shaking her hands about to speed up the drying process.

Hyde looked at her like she was crazy.

"Well Steven? What did he say? Is he devastated we aren't coming for New Years?"

"He was fine. Guess he was a bit bummed but he was okay. Bought the whole story, so we're in the clear" Hyde said as he flicked on the TV. Chips was about to start. He hoped Jackie's nails kept her occupied so that he could watch the whole episode in peace. He enjoyed having her around, but he also enjoyed some quiet time. Time when she didn't yap.

"But did he cry? Like, did you hear him choke up?" she asked between blowing on her nails.

"No Jackie, he did not cry. He did not 'choke up'" Why do girls need the whole damn play by play?

"What did he say about me?"

"Nothing" Hyde replied settling himself on the couch. He thought that would shut her up. It didn't.

"What? He never mentioned me? I don't believe you. He must've asked if I was coming, or if you had heard from me. He must've said something" Jackie had stopped painting her nails now and was glaring at Hyde.

Crap! he thought. God he wished he'd just gotten her to make the call. Shame she was such a shit liar.

"Yeah of course Forman asked if you were still going. I told him that no, you had a shoot in Dallas and that you were already there" Surely that was the end of it.

"Did he ask what the shoot was for?"

Oh my god, she is still talking!

"No, Forman did not ask what the shoot was for"

"Did you tell him what it was for?"

"No Jackie, I didn't. I never even thought about it."

"Do you think he believed you? Because I don't know that I would've. Lies are only convincing if you go into full detail. And you didn't go into very much detail Steven."

"Yeah, I guess I didn't. Hey Jackie, when was the last time you washed your hair babe? It's not very shiny today" Hyde said before turning his attention to the TV.

Jackie's jaw dropped as she let out an almighty scream. She ran out of the lounge and slammed the bathroom door.

Cool, that'll give me at least an hour of uninterrupted TV time thought Hyde as he lay down on the couch with a smile.

...

Eric hung up the phone in the basement.

"You were right Donna, he's not coming" he said as he rubbed his head with his hand.

"I told you Eric, I knew he wouldn't come" Donna grumbled leaning back into her seat on the couch.

"Who's not coming where?" Kelso asked as he bounded down the stairs.

Eric didn't turn to look at him, he kept his gaze firmly on the TV.

"Hyde man, Hyde's not coming back for New Year's"

"Awwwww man! That sucks! I thought we were gonna have a boys night n get drunk n throw stuff at other stuff!" Kelso was bummed. Real bummed. He'd come all the way from LA and only half his friends were home.

"So, what was the moron's excuse?" Donna asked, looking at her boyfriend. "Let me guess, he has to work?"

"No, he reckons the Camino's stuffed and it's too late to organise another way to get here" Eric knew Hyde was full of shit but he hoped that the real reason wasn't the argument they'd had on Christmas night.

"Did he say anything about Jackie?" Donna asked. "I've been trying to ring her and there's no reply" Donna prayed Jackie would still be coming. She had loved having her around at Christmas time.

"He reckons she's gone out of town for work. Some shoot in Dallas or something. I dunno….this just blows" Eric sighed.

"Dallas man, how I'd love to go to Dallas" Kelso smiled as he made his way to the freezer to get an iceblock.

"Yeah yeah we know, Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders blah blah blah" Donna said irritated. She turned to Eric, "well I think it sucks Jackie hasn't rung to tell me she's not coming. I thought her n I were all good when she left. Although…."

"What Donna?" Eric asked.

"Although we did have a bit of a fight on Christmas night"

"Fight?" Kelso's ears pricked up. "What kinda fight? Were there pillows? Mud? Jell-o? C'mon big red ya gotta tell me"

"Shut up Kelso ya moron! No, we just had a disagreement about Hyde. I was saying what an asshole he was, or is, to her and she got mad. She was like…sticking up for him…it was weird"

Donna was confused. Why the hell would Jackie stick up for Hyde? Why the hell would Hyde drunkenly bring up his relationship with Jackie and lash out at everyone except Jackie? Why did he care about the demise of that creepy and unnatural union?

"Earth to Donna….what's going on?" Eric asked waving his hand in her face.

"Josephette!" she announced as she jumped off the couch and started pacing the basement.

"Josephette? What are you talking about Donna? Are you high?" Eric asked Donna as he eyed her suspiciously.

"No Eric, it all makes sense! Hyde told me that the girl he is seeing is named Josephette. I once called Jackie Josephette in front of him…." Donna started.

"Hold up Donna, I thought Josephette was a girl from our old school?" Kelso was confused.

"Shut up Kelso!" Donna continued "Jackie also got mad at me for bagging on Hyde. She even said he'd changed. Hyde got mad at us, accusing us of ruining his relationship with her. But did you notice that night he never once accused her of anything? And he always blamed everything on her"

"So let me get this straight" Eric got up and began pacing the basement with Donna, "you're saying that Elvira, is Josephette, who is really Jackie?"

"Yes Eric, I'm saying Hyde and Jackie are back together! Oh my god Eric, and the kiss! The kiss on Christmas morning! Do you remember?"

"yeah, I.." Eric started before being interrupted by Donna,

"And bowling! How did I not see it Eric?" she said before doing her best impression of Hyde "it was no worse than bowling man…I actually really, really like bowling"

"And the presents! Donna, Jackie wrapped his Christmas presents!" Eric was pleased he finally had some evidence of his own to contribute to Donna's discovery. He had been feeling pretty useless prior to this recollection.

"Man you guys, I'm really confused." Kelso admitted. "Bowling, presents, Elvira, freaking Josephette…I consider myself a pretty clued up kinda guy but I am not following this at all"

"Don't worry Kelso, you don't need to follow this just yet. You just need to be free to go on a road trip tomorrow" Donna smirked.

"A road trip? On New Year's Eve?" Eric asked. "Where the hell are we going?"

"Chicago Eric, we're going to Chicago. If those dillholes won't come out and tell us about their relationship, we'll make them squirm until they have no choice but to come clean".

"Me likey…." Eric smiled drumming his fingers on his cheek.