Author's Note: Thanks again for the wonderful reviews. They really keep me going. And we are in Barksdale, folks! Time to see what Merle's been hiding. I could listen to that song all day.
***Italics indicate a flashback for Daryl
****Bold italics indicate a dream for Daryl
A Better Man
Summary: After Carol's death, Daryl makes a desperate wish to save her. Suddenly, he finds himself back in the quarry, staring as she and her daughter cower in the shadow of her husband. With all of his memories of the future intact, can Daryl change life as he knows it?
Disclaimer: From here on out, I do not own The Walking Dead or any of its characters. I also do not own any song lyrics that you may find in this story. Their owners are listed next to them.
Chapter 20: Merle's Mission
What if I'm far from home? Hey brother
Oh brother I will hear you call
What if I lose it all?
Oh sister I will help you back home
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
There's an endless road to be discovered
Hey sister
Do you still believe in love, I wonder?
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
…Avicii – Hey Brother
Merle was pacing when Daryl came into the dream world. Daryl smirked. The fucker was actually nervous about this trip.
"Good. You're here," Merle greeted, "It's time."
"You've looked better, Bro. Expectin' somethin'?" Daryl wondered. Merle shot him a glare and nabbed him by the collar.
"Listen, Boy, ya don't screw this up, alright? Ya keep Sugar Tits in check and you don't fuck this up," he growled. Daryl's eyebrows flew up to his hairline.
"Jesus, Merle. I ain't never see you this rattled up since that stripper ya was bangin' stole your drugs," Daryl observed. He gulped nervously when he could actually hear his brother's teeth grinding together.
"You get this fuckin' thing done, ya lil' smart ass," Merle snapped dangerously, "Ya don't and I'm dead. Remember. Jake's. The bar. Ya go in there and ya find what I want ya to find."
"Alright!" Daryl threw his hands up in surrender, "What is it I'm lookin' for?"
"You'll know it when ya see it," Merle shot at him, "Now wake the fuck up, Daryl, and get ya ass to Barksdale."
When Daryl opened his eyes, it was still dark and Carol was curled up against him. He was very reluctant to move away from her warm, naked body, however he had a feeling that if he closed his eyes, his brother would give him all kinds of hell for it. With a sigh, he gently moved away, trying to be careful not to wake her as he readied for his trip to Barksdale, but he failed in that endeavour.
"It's still dark," she murmured sleepily.
"Just gonna get Andrea movin' and get set to go," he whispered, placing a kiss on her shoulder, "'Sides, sooner we get goin', sooner we gonna get back…and I really don't wanna deal with Shane 'fore we go."
"You'll be careful?" Carol wondered, turning her head to look at him.
"I'm comin' back to ya, woman. Ain't no doubt," he told her, leaning in to catch her lips in his in long, lazy kiss. He groaned as her hands moved over his chest. He pulled back.
"Keep that up and I won't be wantin' to go anywhere," he warned. She smiled mischievously.
"How about I give you a reason to come back?" she asked, grinding herself against him. He groaned low and long as she brushed up against his hardened erection.
"What the hell?" he shrugged. Merle's mission of madness could wait while he let Carol take advantage of him. He pulled her to him and hooked her leg over his hip. She sat above him, straddling him.
"Definitely comin' back," he moaned, his hands moving up her back to cup her breasts as she sank down onto his length.
Fifteen minutes later, he was giving her a sweet kiss before he moved from the warmth of her tent to the cool early morning air. The night before, she had insisted that he stay with her while Sophia slept over in Carl's tent. It was kind of like a sweet send off before he took off to Barksdale, one that he was definitely okay with. Daryl had realized that she was not the same woman he knew in the future and assuming that she was had gotten him into hot water. They had spent the following days together, just talking about things and getting to know each other all over. He even took her and Sophia with him on a hunt in the forest. They didn't catch shit, but both Carol and Sophia seemed to enjoy the walk through the trees. At night, Carol still came to visit with him and they had eased back into making love following the disagreement. He was more focused than ever on pleasing her, so much so that on one occasion, she had cupped her hand over his mouth to keep him from asking if she was enjoying herself. Afterwards, he would walk her back to her tent. The night before his trip, however, she had asked him to stay with her and he was happy to oblige. It was nice waking up beside her.
He grinned and walked over to the RV. The sun was beginning to creep over the horizon. He opened the door and found Andrea, fully dressed, sitting at the RV putting together her gun. Oh, that damn gun. He still remembered that sleepless night back on the highway in the other timeline. Between Carol's crying and Andrea playing with that stupid gun, he had gotten very little sleep.
"Didn't expect ya to be up," he observed.
"Neither did we," Amy groaned from the bunk. Andrea rolled her eyes and stowed her gun in her pack.
"Love you too, Sis," Andrea called, "Bye Dale," she said, bounding out the RV door, nearly knocking Daryl over in the process, "We heading out?"
"On the bike," Daryl grunted, "Let's get goin'."
They walked back to his campsite where he had already loaded his gun, bow, knife, and arrows into the saddlebag on the bike along with a couple snacks and some water. He had no idea what the hell his brother had in store for him, but he wasn't about to take any chances. He mounted his bike and brought it to life. Andrea got on behind him.
"Where do I hold on?" she asked.
"My waist," Daryl explained. It was strange having a woman besides Carol riding behind him. Those days on the road after the farm fell had him accustomed to her body behind him, holding onto him. Those days had seen him not flinching so much at her touch.
With Andrea behind him, he eased the bike down the driveway and away from the farm. He was thankful that the hour was early and Shane wasn't about to run chasing after them in his underwear. The ex-cop had been a pain in his ass since Daryl announced that he and Andrea were headed to Barksdale, but the rest of the group seemed to take it in stride. Amy and Dale had warned him that he had better bring Andrea back in one piece, which he was fine with. Sophia had been a little upset, but she still saw him as some kind of god or something and had somehow been key in convincing Carol that he would make it back to them.
It took them close to three hours to get to Barksdale. They kept off of the highways and stopped every so often to look at the map Hershel had given them. They hardly seen any walkers, a good sign. As they neared the town, he decided that he would park the bike outside of the town to avoid drawing attention. He didn't know what they were walking into, but the last time he had been to Barksdale, he had not particularly enjoyed it. He had been lured there by Merle so that the asshat could retrieve his drugs and then Merle's asshole motorcycle buddies had attacked him and took most of his supplies. When he had rolled through then, the town had been overrun. Now it was a ghost town.
"You think Merle's here?" Andrea wondered as they strolled into town, "It looks like we'd have better luck finding ghosts here."
"Ya can bet ya ass that we'll find somethin' dead here, that's for damn sure," he replied, ensuring that his bow was at the ready, "It weren't always this quiet. The asshole used to raise hell here with his motorcycle buddies on occasion. Stay sharp. Even though you're a helluva shot, we don't wanna use guns and draw attention to ourselves. Ya probably gonna see some hand-to-hand stuff here."
"Good," Andrea said, her hand resting on the hilt of her knife, "Time to see if your words of wisdom were really that wise."
Daryl rolled his eyes, "Stay close to me and don't bite off more than ya can chew. Ya sister would gut my ass."
They walked towards Jake's bar and Daryl made a silent promise to himself that he would put an arrow in his brother's ass if that bastard had sent him off for drugs. He frowned as he sidestepped a dead body, a man who was shot in the head execution style. That spelled trouble.
"This was recent," Andrea said, whispering, "And I don't think he was a walker when he died."
"Glad to see ya read what observant meant in the dictionary," Daryl muttered, walking a little ways ahead. He found another executed man and then a woman who was slumped against a pillar with a gun in her hand and a hole in her temple.
"Suicide?" Andrea asked, sending an uneasy look his way. Daryl nodded and bent to take the gun from the woman's dead hand. He noticed the way her clothes were rumpled and a feeling of dread settled into his stomach.
"Let's get to the bar and get this shit done," Daryl barked, slipping the handgun into his belt. They rounded a corner to find two male walkers eating a female corpse. He let an arrow fly, hitting the larger of the two males. Then he turned to Andrea, "Your turn, Annie Oakley."
"Me?" Andrea whispered, now seeming a little hesitant when faced with the very real threat of a walker.
"Ya said ya wanted to prove yourself, so get over there and do it. I'll cover ya," he promised, docking another arrow. Andrea took a breath and stepped forward. The other walker had determined that there was fresher prey and snarled as it stumbled towards the blond. She lunged forward, arm up just like he had taught her. She hadn't anticipated the strength of the walker and after she stabbed it in the eye, it fell forward on top of her. Daryl chuckled as she struggled to push it away and then stepped forward to help her out. Black blood stained her light blue shirt.
"Ugh, that was disgusting," Andrea gagged as she stumbled away.
"Bit different than trainin', eh?" Daryl asked, retrieving his arrow and jabbing it into the walkers' meal just to be sure.
"A lot," Andrea said, "Is it always that close?"
"Nah, ya just hesitated a little. Ya gotta hit 'em harder than they're hittin' you," Daryl advised, frowning a little as he observed the two dead walkers. Both men had been shot in the chest and showed no signs of bites or scratches. He hoped Andrea would overlook that in light of her walker kill.
"Let's get in there," he said, looking over at the bar, "Six corpses don't exactly scream 'welcome'."
He approached first and glanced in the window. He cursed under his breath. The bar was teeming with walkers.
"What's wrong?" Andrea whispered, coming up beside him. He pointed at the window and she cringed, "Can we take them out?"
"Not easily," he admitted, knowing she wasn't ready for a group of walkers that size, "Gonna be smart 'bout this. Lead 'em out of the bar."
"Do we have to go in?" Andrea hissed, "If there's walkers in there, then I doubt even your brother would be dumb enough to go in there."
"There's two rooms above the bar. I gotta check," he replied. He glanced around and saw a heaping trash bin. If there was one thing he knew, it was that where there was trash, there were rats. That fact had saved the group from starvation on occasion. He made quick work of piercing two with his arrows. He didn't kill them, only wanting to injure them.
"What the hell?" Andrea wondered as he approached the injured animals.
"Bait," Daryl said simply. Taking the vermin by the tails, he approached the bar door and kicked it open. It drew the walkers' attention, but the thing that got the dead bastards moving was the piercing squeaks of the injured rats. When the dead started to move, Daryl released the rodents and then pulled Andrea around the corner. They watched as the walkers stumbled out of the bar in pursuit of a meal. When the last one ran by, he pulled her into the bar and shut the door.
"Where the hell did you learn how to do that?" Andrea gasped at him. Daryl grinned.
"There are just some things I haven't got 'round to tellin' ya in trainin'," he told her, "If ya can avoid a fight, do it."
"I thought the point of training was to fight," Andrea wondered as they moved to look around the bar. It was every bit as dirty, dank, and depressing as he remembered it. It reeked like death and alcohol. He looked around the main floor for any sign of his brother, but all he noted was the bottles stacked behind the bar.
"Point of trainin' is to teach ya how to survive, be it fightin' or runnin'," Daryl corrected, "Ya need to be thinkin' how ya can survive."
"Alright, alright, Professor," Andrea said, holding her hands up to stop the lecture. Daryl had thought long and hard about this trip, getting used to the idea that Andrea would be with him. The more he thought on it, the more he realized that he ought to show her a few things before she got separated from the group. He had been thinking a lot on that and he knew that had they not lost Andrea at the farm, they would not have met Michonne. Daryl was no idiot and he knew that if it came down to it, he'd rather have the dread-locked, katana-wielding samurai on his side no matter what.
"So, I'm not seeing any sign of your brother," Andrea commented, "I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt that the alcohol and the drugs are coincidental," she said. Daryl snorted and glanced upwards. Merle, you ought to help me out here, Daryl thought. Then, almost as if someone had heard his thoughts, there was a noise from above his head. Andrea had heard it too and they both looked up at the ceiling.
"Think we oughta check that out," Daryl said, heading for the stairs.
"Figured you'd say that," Andrea muttered, following him. They took it slow, Daryl in the lead with his bow. Four walkers had remained in the upstairs and all four were fixated on the second door on the top of the stairs.
"They want in that room," Andrea observed.
"That kinda focus usually means they can eat whatever's in there," Daryl replied, letting an arrow fly into the skull of the largest walker, "We go in and fight shoulder-to-shoulder," he ordered, unsheathing his knife. They moved together in the cramped hallway. Andrea was quick about taking out the walker on the right, using more force than she had with her first. Daryl killed the one on the left and kicked the middle walker back away from them. Then he watched as Andrea finished it off.
"Ready to see what's behind door number one?" Andrea asked, turning the handle and pushing. Nothing happened, "It won't budge," she said.
"Let me," Daryl grumbled, repositioning his bow as he hit the door with his shoulder. It didn't open, "Son-of-a-bitch!" he cursed.
"H-hello?" a voice, an actual living voice, called from the other side. It was female and it was weak.
"Are you alright?" Andrea called, "Can you open the door?"
"I-I can't," the woman groaned, "It's blocked. The…the window…" her voice trailed off into a coughing fit. Daryl looked towards the other door. He supposed that if both rooms had windows, then they could shimmy over to her.
"C'mon," he said to Andrea, who looked at him like he had grown another head.
"We can't leave her!" she protested.
"We ain't," he replied, "let's see if we can get in there and shimmy over to the room through the windows."
They entered what looked like a small office. The window was busted open and was easily large enough for them fit through. He was thankful for the bit of ledge that he used to sidestep over the other window. When he crawled inside the next window, the smell of death, blood, urine, vomit, and shit filled his nostrils. He gagged as he got his bearings, but when he turned, he was met with a gun in his face.
"Fuck!" he swore as he raised his hands.
"Jesus!" Andrea gasped as she crawled in behind him. Whether it was from the smell of the room or the appearance of the woman pointing a gun at them was anybody's guess. She was a slight thing and from the looks of it, she was sicker than a dog. Sweat had plastered her red hair to her skin and she was breathing hard. Her green eyes were glazed over and drooped as she struggled to keep them opened. Her arms shook slightly, as if pointing the handgun at him was zapping her of every bit of strength he had. She hadn't even stood up to point the gun at him. She just sat on the floor, leaning against the wall to keep her upright.
"Are…are ya gonna…ya gonna kill me like ya did the rest?" she managed to get out.
"Whoa, we didn't kill no one!" Daryl protested, "We rode in here and only killed them walkers tryin' to get at ya!"
"You can put the gun down," Andrea said calmly, "We're not going to hurt you. My name's Andrea. This is Daryl. We can help you."
The woman considered them for a moment, the gun in her hand shaking worse than ever now and she struggled to spit out a question, "Why are ya h-here?"
"Lookin' for my damn brother," Daryl explained, "Ya seen him? His name's Merle and he used to practically live in this place."
She suddenly dropped the gun, letting it clatter to the floor, "You…you're Merle's brother? M-Merle Dixon?"
"You know him?" Andrea asked, shocked. The woman nodded.
"He's my brother. Who the hell are ya?" Daryl demanded. He waited until she finished hacking away.
"Tara Hannigan. Ran with Merle for a while," she told him. Daryl frowned. Merle sent him here to find his old girlfriend?
"You're his girlfriend?" Andrea wondered. This earned her a weak chuckle.
"Honey, Merle don't do girlfriends. He was good f-for a good fuck, but that's it," Tara replied, wincing as she struggled to change her position.
"Ya seen him lately?" Daryl asked, "Got separated from him a while ago."
She shook her head, "Ain't seen him since he got busted."
"Shit," Daryl cursed, "Ya here alone?" he asked, looking around. A pile of furniture was barricaded against the wall and he could see a dead body, a female propped against the opposite wall.
"Greg, Nick, Billy, Matty, Sylvia, and Anna were outside when they got jumped by some sick fucks. Me and May heard it all," Tara paused to cough, "B-Bastards killed the guys and…and I could hear the girls screaming. If it weren't for the eaters in the bar, they woulda came up here."
"Eaters?" Andrea asked.
"Walkers," Daryl translated, "What happened to ya friend?" he asked, pointing to the corpse of the woman on the other side of the room.
"She lost her guy down there and when she heard them eaters outside the door, she…" Tara trailed off and winced slightly as she mimed shooting herself in the head. Daryl cringed.
"What's wrong with you?" Andrea changed the topic, "Bit? Scratched?"
Tara shook her head, though even that caused her a good deal of difficulty, "Nah, this would be your damn brother's fault," she shot at Daryl.
"Merle?" Daryl wondered, "But you said-"
She just pointed to a bundle of blankets there on the floor. Daryl knit his brow in confusion and he exchanged a wary look with Andrea. He stepped passed Tara to examine the bundle. He half-expected drugs, which would have made sense coming from his brother, but he met the shock of his life when he was met with a baby sleeping soundly in the rags.
"What the fuck?" Daryl gasped, looking over at the sick woman.
"Oh my god!" Andrea exclaimed as she looked over at the baby.
"That son-of-a-bitch always said he'd get me back for givin' him the clap," Tara let out a weak chuckle, "Never dreamed it'd be like this."
"It's Merle's?" Daryl questioned, his eyes wide.
"Always screwed 'round with him when he was in town," Tara moaned, "Only guy I been with in the last year. Then a month or so later, I find out he knocked me up. The next thing I know he's in the joint and I'm huge and in the middle of a fuckin' zombie shit show."
"Did he know?" Daryl asked, staring down at the baby, "He never said a damn word to me."
"T-Told him and he spouted shit 'bout it not bein' his and me tryin' to…t-trap him. Then two days later, he's gettin' his ass hauled out of here for dealin'."
"Jesus Fucking Christ!" Daryl moaned, running his hands through his hair. His brother had a fucking baby. This was what Merle had sent him for? Fuck!
"I'm so sorry," Andrea said softly.
"Tried to find him," Tara coughed, her voice quieter than before as she struggled to keep her eyes open, "Came back here. F-Figured this is where he'd come."
"We rolled through here a month or so ago," Daryl explained, "Why are ya so sick?"
"Lotta bad stuff happened yesterday," Tara grunted, closing her eyes.
"Hey!" Daryl protested, hitting her clammy cheek, "Wake up, here! Stay with us!"
Her eyes fluttered open. They were green. She was panting in exhaustion, "F-Fuckin' bastards rolled in, killed my friends. Went into labour. Baby cried and brought the eaters here. M-May shot herself. I've been sick, bleedin'. Ain't gonna…wanna die."
"We know a doctor," Andrea said desperately, "We can get you to him…"
"She won't make it," Daryl stated sadly. There was no way Tara Hannigan was going to last three minutes let alone three hours.
"Gonna die," Tara said, her voice slurring, "Can ya…can ya take care of her?"
"Her? It's a girl?" Daryl asked. Tara nodded slightly as she winced in pain.
"I'd pay good money to see Merle Dixon with a daughter," Andrea snorted and Daryl couldn't help but agree. Dixons didn't have daughters.
"She got a name?" Daryl asked.
"Lily," Tara sighed, tilting her head slightly to look at the baby girl. Daryl watched her for a moment. She seemed almost calm as she looked at her baby. Then she turned back to him, "Please…"
He bowed his head and sighed. Taking care of a baby wasn't part of the plan, at least not until Lil' Asskicker came into the picture, but he knew he had to. This little baby was his blood and Merle had wanted him to go and get her. He remembered on the first dream conversation with his brother and how Merle said that there was something in that bar that would make him think a little more on attacking the governor. If this kid was so damn important, Daryl would do whatever it took to keep her safe.
"I'll take care of her," Daryl promised. Tara smiled a little, as if he had just taken the weight of the world off of her shoulders. He supposed that he had and that he had put it all on his own shoulders.
"Ya find Merle…punch him in the face for me," she murmured, closing her eyes. Daryl chuckled a little, but it was a hollow sound. The woman was dying.
"Is she gone?" Andrea asked in a whisper. Daryl reached over and pressed his fingers to Tara's neck. There was no pulse.
"Yeah. She's gone."
At that moment, the baby let out a whimper from her set of rags. Andrea and Daryl looked at each other. Daryl was closer and gently lifted the baby out of the rags.
"Hey, Kid, how ya doin'?" Daryl whispered, holding her up to inspect her.
"She's filthy," Andrea observed, "She needs a bath. Probably needs fed too. How are we going to do this?"
"There's a pharmacy down the street. Sure as shit they have some baby crap," Daryl remembered, glancing around the room. He noticed some paper towel and a couple bottles of water, "Grab me them towels and water. Some sheets too," he requested, carrying the infant to a table and waited as Andrea grabbed the necessary items. He wet down the paper towel. He gently rubbed her with it, taking away the blood and filth. The baby was filthy. No one had really taken the time to wash her off and now she was covered in her own filth. He hoped that he was gentle enough. Aside from feeding and holding Judith, Daryl had been pretty hands off with the prison's baby. Hell, if there was any sign that she needed changed, he passed her off to the next person as if she was a hot potato. Now here he was, washing all kinds of disgusting crap from his new niece. Niece. The thought brought a small smile to his lips.
Then she opened her eyes to look at him. They were blue and held nearly the exact same shape as Merle's eyes.
"She's beautiful," Andrea breathed, "If you can get passed all the crap she's covered in."
"Dixons were meant to be dirty," Daryl replied, smiling a little as the baby scowled as he wiped at her face with a new paper towel. She moved her hands as if to try to bat him away. Daryl chuckled.
"Yup. I reckon you're ya father's daughter," he told the baby, "Ya already got his damn face. Sorry, Kid."
Andrea chuckled, "She's definitely a lot prettier than her father," she corrected him, "I can't believe we found a baby…Merle's baby."
"Yeah, no kidding," Daryl agreed as he tossed the paper towel aside, "but the fucker never bothered to use a damn rubber or else he wouldn't have spent my damn money on prescriptions for his burnin' dick."
"Ugh, you sure know how to paint a picture," Andrea cringed, "What are we going to do after we hit the pharmacy? We can't take a baby on the bike."
"We'll find a truck," Daryl decided, "We can load up the bike later."
"Why not just leave the bike-"
"I ain't leavin' my damn bike!" he growled, "Wrap the kid up in those old bed sheets. I'm gonna try and shift some of this shit at the door. Ain't crawlin' out a window with a baby."
There was a sound from behind them. They both turned and saw Tara's form sit up with no difficulty. Her green eyes were cloudy, red and bloodshot. She let out a snarl. Daryl cursed his stupidity. He had been so focused on the baby that he had forgotten to make sure that Tara wouldn't come back.
"What the-"
"Hold the fuckin' kid," Daryl ordered, unsheathing his knife and bringing it through Tara's eye. She fell to the floor with a thud. The baby was startled by the noise and let out a whimper from Andrea's arms. Daryl glanced back at Andrea and his niece. The blond was pale with her eyes wide and her mouth gaping opened. Daryl cussed in his head.
Andrea had just discovered one of the best kept secrets of the apocalypse.
TBC
This was one of the first chapters for this story that I had written. Originally, Daryl went at it alone, but after lots of thought, I decided he ought to take Andrea with him. It builds on her confidence and establishes a friendship between them. Plus, it shows that he can't do anything without people anymore. Also, Barksdale comes from the Survival Instinct video game (which I read about and then picked up last week. Cool game, but I forgot that I'm rubbish at xbox so I've killed Daryl more than a few times...whoops) and I am only describing it in the generalist terms as I have a long way to go before I hit that point.
Next chapter: Daryl and Andrea make their way out of Barksdale and run into an old acquaintance.
Read and review! Let me know how you feel about this chapter and what you see in the future! Your reviews keep me going!