Happy Christmas everyone! Hope you all had/are having a great day and here's a new chapter!

Chapter 21

19th December 2017…

"Thanks for doing this," muttered John as he fidgeted with his vortex manipulator again. "I think…yep, there we go, I've got the right coordinates this time."

Ianto gave him a wry smile. "I should definitely hope you have," he said. "It wouldn't do at all for you to try and go to all this effort to get this thing done properly and then mess it up by ending up on the wrong side of the universe.

"That has actually happened, once or twice – it was always Jack's fault, of course; the man would never ask for directions, even in the middle of a desert. Fortunately, it never got us into any really serious trouble, and more often than not…" but he trailed off when he realised Ianto was glowering at him. "Anyway. I assume you, Jack and the others can manage to keep Nick occupied for the rest of the day, right?"

The look Ianto gave him in response was entirely unimpressed. "What, exactly, do you take me for? I know precisely what I'm doing – and, if all else fails, I'm almost one hundred per cent sure we can count on the Rift to help us out. Oh, don't worry," he backed away from the ferocious glare John knew had formed on his face at that comment, "I won't let him join in on anything too dangerous. Nothing worse than capturing a stray Weevil, I promise."

"Right answer," said John grimly, even though he knew that Nick would not take such a restriction gracefully. "Because I'm sure you can understand that I would really prefer not to lose him before we can celebrate our first Christmas as a married couple." He grabbed his scar and wrapped it tightly around his neck. "Ianto, I have to ask – do you think he suspects we're up to something?"

"Of course he does." Ianto scoffed and rolled his eyes a little. "For one thing, you and I both know he's not stupid. For another thing, and I hate to point this out, but you have not exactly been subtle about any of this. Mind you, I also think he's got enough on his plate, especially after last week."

"Well, yes, that's true." John sighed as he remembered. After talking extensively with the rest of the team, as well as with Dan and Rupesh, Nick had finally made the hard decision to tell Sam and Ryan the truth about Ryan's sister, Sarah, and how she had actually died. It had turned out that Ryan, at least, had suspected that there was more to the story than he had been told, largely thanks to some letters that Sarah had sent him in the weeks before she had died. While she had not been overt or blatant about what she was doing, it had been enough for Ryan to deduce that the work she was doing was dangerous – crucial for humanity, it was true, but dangerous as well.

However, it had turned out that, while Ryan had been shocked, but grateful to know the truth at last, Sam had not taken the news quite so well.

One week earlier…

Nick sighed and leaned back against the sofa, and John immediately wrapped his arms around him. He could tell just how much of a toll the terrible memories had taken on his husband, and it hurt deeply that he was having to dredge them all up again and relive them, one by one. Even the fact that he was doing it so that he could help his friend was no consolation.

"Wow." Ryan rubbed his face and breathed out heavily. "I…wow."

"It's a lot to take in, believe me, I know," said Nick quietly.

"Yeah. I…well, thanks for telling me, I guess." He stood up and paced around the room, his eyes moving swiftly around and his hands running through his hair. "I'm glad…glad she…" but he stopped again and shook his head. "I need some air," he finally gasped out and rushed out of the front door.

John sighed. "Well, now that he knows, we can introduce him to Emily, the counsellor who works with us, if that's what she wants," he said cautiously. "It's entirely up to him, but she's been brilliant with Nick and Ianto and maybe she could help him too."

"Oh, aye." Sam did not look up at them, "I'm very sure she could. But then again, maybe it would have helped him more if he hadn't been told about it in the first place!" he snarled.

John jerked back, startled and ready to reply equally angrily, but Nick shook his head and sat up straight again. "Sam," he said quietly, "don't think for one minute that I came to this decision lightly. I thought long and hard about whether this was the right thing to do, and whether Ryan would be able to cope with it. But, in the end, I felt that it was for the best and, more importantly, that he had a right to know the truth about this. You heard what he said, too, about Sarah writing to him – he knew that there was more to this than what he'd already been told."

"And he's no fool either," added John. "You know that. If he'd dug deep enough, he'd probably have worked it all out, sooner or later, and I can't see how that would have been any better."

Sam shook his head. "No, don't give me any of that. I mean, you…okay, I can sort of let you off since you only met us properly last week. But you!" he spun round to face Nick, "six years you've known about this – six goddamn years! – and you decide that now is the right time to tell him about it? I know it's been a while since we've seen each other, but I thought he was one of your friends, for goodness sake!"

"He is!" exclaimed Nick. "It's because he's my friend that I felt I had to tell him!"

"Rubbish!" scoffed Sam. "All you've done is drag up one of the worst days of his life! If you were going to tell him, don't you think it should have been straight away, rather than letting him believe in those lies for so long?!"

"Hey!" John had heard enough and now he jumped to his feet and grabbed Sam's wrist. "Don't you dare talk to my husband like that! You have no idea – absolutely none at all – just how difficult this has been for him. I know it can't have been easy for Ryan to hear all that, and I do sympathise, but can you just take one moment and imagine, just for that one little moment, what it was like for all those people who were there on the day and had to watch their innocent colleagues and friends die, knowing that they could be next? Just put yourself in their position for one minute, if you can, and stop throwing out senseless accusations!"

He waited for Sam to speak, but when he only scowled, he added. "Oh, and for the record, the reason Nick didn't say anything in the first place was because he didn't know, not for sure! He had his suspicions, yes, but he didn't want to say anything in case he'd been wrong."

"And I thought Ryan would feel better knowing that his sister didn't die for nothing," whispered Nick. "I don't know what her role there was, but I do know that in her time at Torchwood, she helped to protect the Earth so many times. We might not even be here if it wasn't for people like her."

"Not that it did her much good in the end," growled Sam. "It didn't stop her from dying, did it?"

"No, it didn't. And it didn't help the others who were lost there, either. But, if nothing else, what happened that day was a wake-up call that the organisation needed and at least ensured –"

"That nothing like that would ever happen again – oh, please!" Sam rolled his eyes. "Give it a rest. Even you can't be naïve enough to believe that's even possible. I mean, seriously, even if it had actually worked, considering that Cardiff is now apparently the new hot-bed for alien activity – do you think it's going to be any consolation at all for Ryan?" He shook his head, his eyes burning with furious tears. "I need to go and find him, try and pick up the pieces you've managed to leave him in. I just hope it's not too late."

"Sam!" protested Nick.

"Save it. There's a spare key in the bowl there; make sure you're not here when we get back." He stopped halfway out of the door and turned back. "Have a nice life together – what's left of it, that is."

"Hey, that's –" but the door slammed shut before John could finish the sentence. "Shit!" he growled and kicked out at the floor

"John." Nick stood up very slowly and rested a trembling hand on his shoulder. "It doesn't matter. He's just angry and upset and worried."

"That's no excuse," fumed John. "What he just said – he knew that it was the worst thing he could possibly say to you, he knew how much he would hurt you!"

He turned around and swallowed. "Look at you now; you're all stressed out and worked up and he knows that's not good for you right now."

"I'll be all right," insisted Nick, even as a couple of tears slipped down his cheeks and he started shaking even more violently. "Can we just go home now?"

"I take it neither of you have heard from Sam or Ryan since you told them, then?" asked Ianto.

"No," sighed John. "It's been total radio silence and it's hurting Nick so much." He swallowed hard and looked away, recalling how he had sat up for hours that night calming Nick down and comforting him as he broke down in his arms. How he'd been forced to watch him crying out and tossing and turning in his sleep as those terrible memories had returned to haunt his nightmares all over again. His heart broke over and over again at having to see the man he loved so scared and vulnerable, and he cursed the Scotsman for his part in doing that to him.

"That's why I want to do this properly," he said, speaking almost to himself. "I want to take this chance to remind him that there are still plenty of people here who love him and want to be there and support him, no matter what it takes."

He was surprised when Ianto came over and squeezed his hand gently. The Welshman did not say a word, but they shared a significant look and John realised there and then that Ianto understood and acknowledged the other reason he had for doing this, even though neither of them could stand to say it out loud.

"Okay," he said, taking a deep breath and dragging his other hand over his eyes, "let's get this show on the road. Time to start making this Christmas the best one ever."

Ten minutes later…

"Okay, John, where exactly are we going?" asked Emily as she and Garrett followed John into the tourist office.

"We are going somewhere I can absolutely guarantee you two have never been before," answered John, laughing at the matching looks of frustration that his cryptic reply was greeted with. "What? Oh, come on, you would never want me to spoil the surprise, now would you?"

"You mean you couldn't trust us not to tell Nick that we were going somewhere off-planet," contradicted Garrett. "You are not a subtle man Joh, but I think you know that."

"We don't have time for subtle," answered John with a shrug. "Actually, we also don't have time to faff around, so if I were you, I'd stop blathering and get over here so we can go."

The other two rolled their eyes, but nodded and each gripped onto one of John's arms. "Okay. Now, hold on tight," he warned. "It's very easy to get lost doing this and that is not something I particularly want to explain to your other halves."

"Is this the part where one of us should say 'beam…" but Garrett's sarcastic voice was drowned out by the whoosh of air through John's ears. He closed his eyes tightly and gritted his teeth against the nausea surging through his body; even now, this method of travel could apparently still play havoc with his body.

Just keep thinking about why you're doing this, he told himself. Think about Nick's face when he comes in tonight and sees it. Doing something like that for the person you love is going to make this all –

But the thought was cut off when his body hit freezing wet ground and he fell forwards hard. Dimly, he heard twin grumbles – and one rather impressive set of Welsh cursing – and sat up, blinking rapidly as he brushed the snow out of his eyes. "Oh, good," he quipped, seeing his teammates sitting up, "we all made it through in one piece."

"If this is your idea of in one piece, I don't think I want to know how much worse it could have been," huffed Garrett, who was looking dazed. "Remind me again why we couldn't have just called the Doctor for this?"

"After what happened on John's stag night, combined with his previous track record, I think it's been proven that he can't be trusted to get anyone to the right place at the right time." Emily had stood up and was now brushing snow off her clothes. "Still, if we end up with hypothermia, I'm blaming you for it, Hart-Jones."

"Oh, stop complaining, you're both still alive, aren't you?" retorted John as he pulled himself to his feet, hoping no one would notice that he was swaying a bit. "Anyway. Welcome to Vaecano, a place that is going to help us –"

"Make Nick's Christmas?" Emily smiled wryly. "We guessed that." She laughed as John threw a snowball at her. "Oh, do you really want to be doing that?"

"Is there any chance we could just get moving and focus on what we're here for before one of us actually freezes to death?" Garrett pointed at himself. "Come to think of it…what are we doing here?"

"We're here to find a Christmas tree," said John, as though this was the most normal thing in the world to do, although if the incredulous looks he was receiving in response were anything to go by, it wasn't. "What?"

"Sorry, but…" Garrett blinked very slowly as though he was having trouble comprehending something, "I must have been hallucinating, but I could have sworn I just heard you tells us that you've just brought us who knows how far across the universe just for a Christmas tree. Please, please tell me you're not serious."

"Then cover your ears." John shrugged and started walking off. "And, trust me, you will warm up pretty soon, though you should have listened to me when I told you to wrap up properly."

He heard Garrett mutter something irritable and vaguely obscene, but decided that it wasn't worth the effort of replying to him when he was in this mood. Of course, it was technically true that they could have simply gone to the local shops and bought a nice tree there, but the fact was, he simply hadn't wanted to. He had wanted to do something new and really special this time, and if coming to a different planet was what that would take, then that was exactly what he was going to do, regardless of what anyone else thought. Besides, he admitted to himself, there was another reason why he had chosen this place in particular, out of all the other ones he could have picked.

The trio eventually came to a halt in the middle of a dense forest, lit only by the lights of millions of tiny fireflies. Emily stared up at them, her hands clasped over her mouth in astonishment, and even Garrett managed to stop complaining and look impressed. No one wanted to speak or move in case they broke the moment, and John felt tears prick his eyes as he was assaulted by a stream of memories of the last time he had set foot in this forest and the times, both happy and sad, that he had spent here in the past. He glanced over at Emily and Garrett, who were apparently still spellbound by the scenery, even as the fireflies decided to come and swirl around them, and he sighed. As fond as he was of his companions – though he could definitely have done without Garrett's constant moaning about the weather – he was only too aware of who he would have really wanted to have brought here, except that now it was too late. Had he known what would be in their future and how little time they would have in the end, he would have made every effort to bring Nick here, to show him this place; he might even have taken him here on their honeymoon. But, as he well knew, there was no point in wishing for what might have been. All he could do was hope that his plan went right and that, if he couldn't bring Nick to this place, then at least he could bring it back to him, just so he could have a small taste of it.

With a sigh, he wiped his hand over his face and turned back to the others. "All right, come on then," he ground out, "let's get moving. It's starting to get late and we want to be out of here before it gets dark." And please, for once, don't argue or ask any questions.

To his great relief, neither of them did, though John did notice that Garrett seemed very reluctant to leave the place. He could understand that; the first time he had come here, he had been just as taken in by the mysterious beauty of the place and just as reluctant to leave it. But he also knew that one thing they were short of was time, and that this was a situation that had to be handled hastily and without the usual delicacy.

Spinning around, he walked over to the younger man and caught his arm. "Sorry about this," he said and, without any warning, he smashed their mouths together hard, hoping this would work.

It did. As though a switch had suddenly been flipped on, Garrett let out a yell and backed away, his grey eyes wide with shock and fury. "What the hell was that for?!" he spluttered.

"Don't ask questions now," snapped John. "Believe me, I wasn't exactly thrilled with having to do that either, but you'll thank me for it later – and so will your husband when we get home again. Now, come on." He stomped on, but when he realised that the other two were still flat-out gaping at him, he groaned. "Let's just say that this place may be beautiful, but it's also extremely dangerous and leave it at that. Now, can we please get moving!"

They did, though not without having to listen to Garrett's incredulous sputtering about what had just happened. John almost laughed out loud at how insulted he sounded. I almost feel as though I should be insulted on behalf of my past self, he mused. Sure, I've changed in a lot of ways, mostly for the better, but I don't think my kissing ability has gone downhill – or, at least, I certainly hope it hasn't. he silently resolved to test that theory with Nick when they got back. It certainly never hurt to be sure.

"Hey, John?" Emily had caught up with him, her face a little pink. "Are you going to have to do that on the way back? Only, Garry might kill you or castrate you if you try."

"He can try both of those things, but they aren't going to stick, as you know very well," scoffed John. "Besides, we aren't exactly going to be coming back this way. Oh, don't look so alarmed," he rolled his eyes as Emily stared at him. "I'm not the sort of guy who'd bring you all the way here and then just dump you for fun – well, not now at least. But we're going to get to our destination, do what we need to do, and then leave from there."

"You'd better not be leaving us behind, that's for sure," muttered Garrett, but there was no real rancour in his voice any more. "Though, for the record? If you were to try and kiss me, or anything else, again, I will not be the one to kill you. I won't have the chance."

His voice was calm and quiet, but there was no mistaking the threat there, and John swallowed. "Noted," he agreed. He had absolutely no inclination to mess with a weapons expert, especially not one who was ferociously protective of his husband. "You're…not really going to tell Matt about it, though, are you?" he asked, trying to sound casual. "Because, seriously, I only did it for your own good. You were starting to get swept away by the forest." He noticed then, with some relief, that the trees were finally starting to think out and he could see the sea in front of them. About blood time, he thought with a grim smile.

Garrett didn't appear to have noticed it though. "And…that would have been bad?" He snorted. "You make it sound like this place is sentient or something."

"I don't know about sentient." John closed his eyes and breathed in the sudden salty tang of the sea air as they left the trees behind. "But yes, it certainly is something."

Emily had apparently had enough now, because she rolled her eyes. "Will you both stop it?" she snapped, smacking Garrett on the arm and John around the head. "Garry, you've been a pain in the arse ever since we got here, so just for a few minutes can you shut up? And John, stop teasing him and winding him up even more, and maybe just show us where we're supposed to go next?"

"I'm not bloody teasing," muttered John, though he was careful to make sure the other two didn't hear him. "And as for where we're going," he pointed to a shining citadel before them, right near the beach, "it's right there."

He stood where he was and just stared out at the view. The sun was setting over the water and shining brightly over the now snow-covered beach, even as the waves crashed against the shore. Looking around, he could see the plants and flowers bursting through the shining brickwork, just as they always had before. To the naked eye, it looked as though nothing had changed, but for John it was only too clear that everything was different now. He shivered even as he looked at it, already overwhelmed with emotion. Closing his eyes, he could see the place in its former glory, feel the warm sun on his face, even smell the unusual plants as they were cultivated day by day.

At the same time, as he delved further into his memories, he could hear the voices talking and laughing amongst themselves, gushing over the new plants that had been acquired. They all sounded so happy and so full of life that it seemed inconceivable to imagine that everything could have changed so quickly and become so –

He gasped and opened his eyes, blinking and breathing heavily. That had been so vivid, so real, it was almost as though he had been back there again.

"I…" he swallowed and cleared his throat, suddenly realising that the other two were staring at him with a mixture of curiosity and concern. "I'm fine," he tried again. "Come on, we came here to do a job, so let's get on with it."

They wandered across the beach, the sand under the snow cushioning their feet, and headed for the city. As they approached it, something caught John's eye and he looked around, blinking against the now rapidly falling snowflakes. He gasped when he looked closer and realised what he was seeing.

It was a small grove in which hundreds of tiny red, white and purple flowers were growing, apparently untroubled by either the cold weather or the falling snow. They stayed, bright and proud, as though they were guarding the gleaming monument they surrounded.

Next Time: What monument has John stumbled upon? Will the trio get home in time for Christmas?