Thus, the last chapter! :D I'm planning on doing Sea of Monsters too, but what do you guys think? I luuuuuuv reviews!

Disclaimer: I am to Rick Riordan as an apple is to a muffin. An apple is not a muffin.

Pelting down a long, echoing corridor was bad enough. Knowing that one misstep could cost him the one second, one instant that decided if he would make it, was so much worse. As he ran, Green wondered why he had to go through that whole fiasco with the lightning bolt, with Ares and Hades and the lord of time all trying to kill him and his friends, only to be defeated by such a stupid mistake.

C'mon you imbecile, you call that running? You have seconds left, if that! The maple leaf roared at him from his sock.

This is as fast as I can go! He shouted back, as he brought his hand up to his face. A watch wound its strap around his wrist, and he watch the seconds tick by. Five, he slid on the slick floor, crashing into the wall. Four, he rose to his feet and painfully limped on, gaining speed again. Three, he was sprinting again, his side throbbing. Two, his destination was in sight, an open door with light streaming through, but it was too far. One, and he was almost there, just another foot-

The bell rang. Green slowed down as best he could, but he still slammed into the doorway with enough force to send him sprawling, causing the bespectacled woman at the front of the room to shriek in alarm and drop her chalk. Clock one, plant boy zero. He'd been doing fine when he left homeroom, but then his locker had refused to accept his combination five times. When he looked up and realized it wasn't his locker, and began frantically spinning the lock on its next-door neighbor, it had still taken three attempts to open the stupid thing.

His science teacher, Mrs. Tessla, was not amused.

"This is the third time you have been tardy! What is so important that you can't get to class on time?" He sighed, walking up to the board and picking up a piece of chalk. "What are you doing, young man?"

My locker took 4ever 2 open. Satisfied, he stepped back from the board. His seat was in the very back, which meant he had to step over three outstretched legs and a backpack until he was finally able to sit down. People were still giggling.

That, said the maple leaf, was the most pathetic attempt at subtly entering a classroom late I've ever seen. Seriously, you tripped, made the teacher scream, wrote on the board, and even managed to stumble six times before you sat down.

Leave me alone, he groaned.

That really should have been the worst part. Of course, usually making a fool of himself wasn't the worst thing to happen to him on any given day. Still, setting a teacher's hair on fire and then jumping out of a window was a cruel and unusual accident.

It all went wrong when he accidentally spilled some oil on his notebook. The class was making lava lamps out of vegetable oil and water, but his glass of canola had a leak. By the time he noticed the stain, his poor binder was soaked. Then, naturally, he had a static shock. All in all, it felt more like he imagined sticking a fork into an electrical socket would, a huge spark passing between his finger and the rings of his binder. And then, there was inferno.

Out of sheer reflex he flung the flaming book away from him, where it proceeded to bonk his teacher on the head. Maybe she used too much hairspray, but soon there was a little bonfire going up on her noggin. Another instinct led him to open up his water bottle and fling all its contents up onto her head. He'd heard about water on a grease fire only making it worse, but he didn't figure that applied when it was a grease fire that had started a hairspray fire.

Soon, his very wet, very angry science teacher was slowly advancing on him. Green backed up, but soon the wall got in the way.

OUT THE WINDOW! Yelled the leaf in his sock. Right then, he didn't care about how unlikely it was that she'd really hurt him, he wanted out. The science room was on the first floor, so he just spun around and leapt out into fresh air and sprinted away down the street. Percy later told him that the spectacular fashion by which he'd gotten himself expelled was impressive. Coming from Percy, that meant a lot.

THE END! Yay! *NOTE: SEQUEL GOING UP NOW! CALLED THE LORD OF THE PLANTS AND ALL HIS BAD LUCK!*