Chapter 20

Raven saw before her eyes the very Nightmare she feared.

"CONSTANTINE! NOOOOOOO!"

The bright white dome that expanded ten miles faded away, and the once loud cries of Raven's son were silenced. Her son was gone. And Raven felt as if she herself would die in that same instant.

The dark sky returned to daytime, and the birds began chirping again. Raven's familiar tears returned to her. She slowly descended to the ground, landing in the gigantic crater created by Constantine.

Raven shuddered and held herself tight. A puff of cloud exited her mouth. She was cold. The ongoing feeling had resurfaced. The pain was unbearable. Raven's eyes quivered as she searched the area for a body, but saw nothing. She uttered a small whimper that was heard by her comrades. When Beast Boy approached her, he saw that her entire face was soaked from tears. Her eyes were clamped shut, not wanting to open and witness such a horror.

Beast Boy also saw that her hands trembled at her side and at the ground. This was a moment where Raven wished beyond all things that she had a hood. This would be a moment where Raven could hide her expression from everyone and recollect herself. But there was no hood to conceal her face, and emotions raced through her mind.

Beast Boy was about to touch her shoulder when halted by Cyborg. Beast Boy knew that making any contact with her would only worsen the matter, but he just wanted to help. Raven was a complicated person. Many events in her life complicated it further. But the thing Beast Boy knew above all, and he had finally learned it, was that Raven desperately needed someone to comfort her… and he was not it.

And with that, the Titans gloomily left Raven alone.

That's what Raven was now: alone. It was an emotion that Raven wanted for such a long time, but now that she felt it, it was dreadful. Raven was truly alone. Constantine was the only piece of Jeff she had left, and now he was gone.

Raven felt too weak to speak, but yet, she heard herself whisper something anyway.

"God, help me."

Raven was on her knees now, quaking with inner cold. Her eyes slowly opened, and tears rushed out. She felt that it was very difficult to breathe. She would never feel the emotion of love again. Raven looked at her hand, she was sweating ice. Then she slowly rose to feet, and began to walk towards the site.

She knew Jeff intimately, she knew him inside and out. But, if possible, there was a deeper connection between Raven and her son. After all, Raven had never known anyone for as long as she knew Constantine. He was her closed friend, her dearest companion. She had known him even before she knew Jeff, if that's possible. Constantine was not just a reminder of Jeff, he was a part of Raven. He was of her own flesh and blood, her offspring.

She had known him, loved him, and held him close for eighteen years. Nine months in the womb, seventeen years in her arms. Constantine was one of the few people that understood Raven, and she was one of the few people that understood Constantine. Jeff had done it. Whatever he could not relate to Raven his son could. Constantine would be half of her soul mate, and half of her self – the perfect companion for Raven. She finally understood that now. Constantine was the ultimate gift.

Jeff gave his live, and he gave her a son. But with that knowledge of such a great gift, Raven felt worse. Raven had led that gift go, and the thought of that was killing her and causing agony. She felt intense guilt and grief. She lost her husband, now she lost her son. Raven felt like a terrible person. She felt like she didn't deserve to live.

There was not a single trace left of Constantine. The only thing left was his mask. It lay, covered in dirt, as if defeated and forgotten. Raven picked it up, staring at it. Tears dropped from her face and washed away the dirt. She saw the three scars across the mask's top, reminding her of that fateful day.

Somehow, this mask had haunted her ever since the day she saw it. The mask frightened her then, it frightened her now. The mask was more than just something monster hunters wore to hide their fear and give them courage, it was a symbol for what they stood for.

What was it with those two? Why had they given their lives for the preservation of her own? Why was her life so important to them? When Raven asked herself the last of those questions, guilt attacked her again. Heartache was pumping through her body now. The pain of loss racing through her mind, racing through her very soul. And all the while the drafts of bitter cold dwelled around her, lingering for the sake of amusement at the sight of Raven's misery.

---

The door to Raven's office opened, and the weeping psychiatrist stepped inside. She still could not believe that Constantine was truly gone. So much was unclear to her now. The events that led up to this were unclear.

Nothing is certain. Nothing is what it seems. Nothing is clear.

Then the reality hit her…

There is no truth.

Raven felt that she was surrounded by lies. She saw it, she felt it, she smelt it. Raven wiped her tears despite the fact that they were flowing rapidly. She scrambled all around her office – looking for answers, looking for truth. She pushed papers off her desk, she racked her mind, trying desperately to sense the key that would unlock the unopened door.

Then in a second that lasted for hours, she found it.

"Otto Oz, Researcher of Paranormal Wonders.
Guardian Angel Foundation.
1015 West Park Avenue
Metropolis, 90245"

---

"She'll be coming soon," Oz said, "Prepare the gauntlet."

A very cold Raven walked through the snow toward a building on the corner of a street. She was still in her white costume as the tiny snowflakes danced around her in the wind. Oz's headquarters was at least six stories tall, lined with glass windows. Raven made the decision to enter via the front door.

As she stepped inside, Raven noticed that there was no one to greet her. But she did hear an ominous voice from a loudspeaker somewhere. It was Oz.

"Welcome, Raven," Oz's voiced echoed, "Welcome to the Last Act."

Raven closed her eyes and tried to scan the building telepathically, maybe to locate Oz. She couldn't.

"Nice try," said Oz triumphantly, "But those little mind powers won't work here. You're not in Kansas anymore. I've lined the walls and doors with a special material that can't be penetrated by telepathy or astral projections. I'm sure you've heard of it – Nocrum, compliments of Cadmus."

Raven frowned.

"Oh don't be upset, my dear," he cajoled perversely, "If you want to know where I am, you'll have cross all the brooks and complete the game. When you reach the end, you will become Queen.

"This is like chess, Raven, in which each square is owned by a certain character. You are simply a pawn. Think you can win this game?"

Raven began to walk toward a door on the right, which was one of two. She tried her best to ignore all the nonsense Oz was saying, but he just kept getting to her.

"All the ways here belong to me – but why did you come here at all? 'Oh what fun it is!' you'd say. Then I'd respond with 'At the end of two yards, I shall give you your directions – have another biscuit?'

"You, my dear," Oz went on, "would love one. But I continue with, 'At the end of three yards I shall repeat them – for fear of you forgetting them. At the end of four, I shall say good-bye. And at the end of five…

"'I shall go!'"

Raven opened the door, and a giant metal hand reached out and pulled her in. The entire room was silver. The metal hand came from an opening in the ceiling. It released Raven, then retracted back into its compartment. Raven just stood there for a moment, confused.

"You're not making any sense, Oz!"

"Speak when spoken to, young lady! And curtsy when you can't think of what to say! O Frabjous day! Calloh! Callay! Must I chortle in my joy? Join me in the guffaws of utter triumph, as black and white have turned to gray!"

"I've heard that before," Raven whispered to herself, "but where?"

"No use keeping secrets, now, dear Raven! O spawn of Edgar Allen Poe, where art thou to go? Art thou to wallow in thy misery, whilst I enjoy rewriting history?! Ha! I know all about you: the rustles of your feathers, the sharpness of your beak, the quickness of your talon."

Oz pressed a button in the control room. It was labeled "Door 3."

"Come closer," Oz chanted, "If you dare."

"I have nothing left to lose," Raven replied.

Raven walked through the door. She now entered a room that was first very bright, then Oz turned out all the lights, making it pitch black. The door behind her shut.

"Okay, I'm in the dark. Now what?"

"Very good, Raven. You've passed the first brook."

"Are you serious?" Raven asked tonelessly, "That wasn't hard."

"Oh but now the real challenges begin. If you want to catch me, you'll have to travel faster than on foot. Faster, my dear, faster. Faster is the way to go."

Raven heard a honk behind her. She turned around, was blinded by a flash of light, then heard the whistle of a train. It was so blinding in the dark because it was the only light source. Oz cackled with delight as Raven dodged the oncoming train.

"All aboard!" he boomed from the loudspeaker.

Raven back was scraped by the train. Then she jumped and reached through the dark, hoping to grab it. She did. Wherever this train was going, she wanted to go there too.

The train twisted and turned, as if trying to throw Raven off. She held on tight. Raven looked up and saw the train's light focus on part of a wall. Raven continued to hold on. The train sped right through the wall, with Raven still attached.

Raven let go and watched the train speed away. This room was dark, but Oz turned the lights on. This room looked like an old man's study, with a fireplace in the corner. The walls were red, the carpet was brown, and the chairs were white.

Raven didn't have time for this, so she ran down to a hallway where the train had made its exit. She noticed another door off to the right, and opened it.

Stairs.

"Almost there, Raven," Oz sang.

The stairs ended at a black door. When Raven opened it, she was bewildered. The room this led to looked exactly like the underground headquarters where Raven fought Ra's Al Ghul's ninjas just before Jeff fought Red X. Oz must have recreated it.

"Brings back memories?"

Suddenly Raven felt someone grab her from behind and toss her into the wall. Raven hit it hard, then fell to the floor. Her body shook slightly as she stood up. Rampage, the brute of an enemy that fought her years ago, servant of Ra's Al Ghul, was standing right in front of her.

"Never did get a chance to break all your bones, did I?" he said.

"You can't be real," Raven replied, "Starfire told me that you were buried!"

"So I broke out."

Rampage pounced on her. Raven teleported herself behind him, making his attack miss. Rampage backflipped. Raven's eyes widened in surprise.

Since when can Rampage do that?

She dodged. Rampage made continuous swings at her. Raven noticed tiny sparks on both of his pinky knuckles. Raven deduced that was from when he tried to pound her a few seconds ago.

I was right. Raven thought. He's not real.

Raven raised both of her hands, pointing them at him, "Azarath Metrion Zinthos!"

She separated Rampage's joints and limbs. The machinery inside him showed. Raven exhaled, and another door in the wall opened. She heard the sound of Oz's applause.

"Score one for you, Azarathian," Oz admitted, "but the night… oh, the night is still young."

Raven encountered another flight of stairs. She sighed as she levitated above them. The stairs ended at another door. Raven was annoyed.

She turned the knob and pushed it open. She could hardly see in this room. Smoke was everywhere. Oz pushed a button marked "White Queen."

"Are you ready to face the White Queen, Raven?"

Terra walked through the smoke. Raven gritted her teeth with anger. Terra grinned.

"Oh, Rae? Where's your kid? Didn't you bring him along? Aw, did he blow himself up?"

"Shut up!" Raven dove at Terra, punching her across the face. Terra returned the favor by pulling Raven's hair and kneeing her in the gut. Raven was pushed back. Terra lifted her hand, sending a giant boulder at Raven. The Azarathian enveloped it in negative energy and sent it back at the Earthmover.

It carried Terra very far, until a crash confirmed that she was pinned against a wall. Not wanting to lose sight of her opponent, Raven waved her hands, clearing the smoke away. Raven saw that Terra's body was pretty crushed by the rock, but then Terra pushed it off of her.

Raven gasped as Terra stood up… without a scratch. No blood. No bruises. No nothing!

"How? You…? That's not possible!" Raven screamed at her.

"What's the matter, Rae?"

Raven remembered back in The Chapel, Constantine had the same problem. He pummeled the life out of Terra and somehow she recovered without a mark. She couldn't be a robot, because even robots get damaged. Raven looked around the room, looking for some kind of hint… and she found it.

Along the wall and in each of the corners was a light bulb – they illuminated the region, despite the smoke. But Raven speculated that they did more than just illuminate the room.

"You aren't real, Terra."

"What are you talking about? I'm real! You felt me and I felt you! How can you touch me if I was never there?"

"I don't know…" Raven pointed toward one of the light bulbs and shot a spark of negative energy at it. The bulb shattered, and Terra's leg disappeared.

"Hey!" Terra cried.

"…I'm sorry…" Raven did the same to each one of the other light bulbs. When they broke, another part of Terra vanished. First her leg, then her arms, then her torso. Raven lowered her eyes as she pointed to the last light bulb – the one that projected Terra's head.

"…Goodbye, Terra."

She broke the bulb.

The ceiling opened up and it rained white gloves. As each glove it the ground, Raven heard Oz's continuous applause. Raven figured that the ceiling's opening was her only way out. She traveled up it and through a ventilation shaft. When she saw the end of it, she kicked open the vent, landing in a room that looked like a dungeon.

Raven shivered from the sudden drop in temperature. She looked ahead to the end of the room, and saw a door. But she was suddenly distracted from a figure that was chained up in the center of the room. Raven approached it and was suddenly stricken with horror.

It can't be…

There with tattered clothes and bruises all over his body was Raven's long lost husband, Jeff. He looked like he had been tortured for hours with relentless physical beating. Jeff's eyes opened, and he looked at Raven.

"You've finally found me, Raven."

Raven wanted desperately to go to him, but a thought lingered in her mind. Jeff's voice was lacking breath when he spoke.

"Help me…"

"I can't," Raven sobbed. Tears formed in her eyes.

"Raven… help me… you made a promise… please… save me."

"No..." Raven whispered sadly, "You can't be real. All of this is a lie."

"Raven, please. Don't… reject… me… I need you."

Raven grasped her head and screamed at the ceiling.

"Stop! Stop it! Stop it now! Oz! Stop! No! Please stop it!"

When she opened her eyes, she saw Jeff in pain, still chained up. Oz was whispering to her, "Go to him, Raven. Go to Jeff."

"No!" She screamed back, "He's not real!"

Raven fell to her knees. She looked at Jeff. He couldn't be real. The real Jeff died in her arms years ago. She remembered feeling the warmth escape him with a final breath. He gave his life for her.

Raven lied on the ground in the fetal position, crying her eyes out.

"Raven," Jeff said, "I'm right here. I love you."

She put her hands over her ears, not wanting to hear any more, "Shut up! Stop! Leave me alone!"

Why is he doing this to me? Why is Oz tormenting me?

Not only did Raven hurt from the knowledge that Jeff was still dead, but it pained her even more having to reject him when she was being given something she desired ever since Constantine was born. She couldn't go to Jeff, she couldn't hug him and hold him, she couldn't love him this time. Raven couldn't even touch him.

It killed her inside.

Raven wailed out in sorrow.

"Yes, Raven," Oz said, "That's it. That's my girl."

Raven's hands trembled as she slowly stood up. She focused her attention completely on the door, not daring to look at Jeff. Tears trickled down her cheeks, wetting the two threads of hair that went over them.

"My life upheaved," Raven said sternly to herself, "My spirit beaten. My father slain. My son dead. And for what?"

Meanwhile, Oz was in his control room. He stood up from his chair, walked over to a wall, and open a wardrobe closet.

"Raven!" Jeff cried out, "Don't leave me! I love you! Please! Raven, I've waited so long for you to find me! My prayers have been answered! Don't send me into Hell by rejecting me! Please! Raven! I love you!!!"

Raven continued to walk forward, her eyes shut tight.

I'm sorry, Jeff. She thought to herself. I'm so sorry.

Raven reached out and turned the doorknob. As she pulled it open, she saw a mirror in front of her. Raven looked at herself, and couldn't help notice Jeff in chains behind her. Then the reflection disappeared, and a projection inside the mirror was formed.

It was Jeff and Raven standing together, looking at the viewer. In Jeff's arms was baby Constantine, who held the Jason Hockey Mask. Raven saw herself leaning on Jeff's shoulder, while he looked forward very solemnly.

Oz's voice echoed throughout the building, "You've stepped to the edge of the looking glass."

The viewer, Raven, clenched her fists firmly, "You better pray, whoever you are…"

She kicked the mirror down, revealing an empty conference room.

"My," said Oz, "That was fittingly dramatic."

As she entered, Raven noticed that the left side of the room was littered with seven doors, and on the right was a glass window that showed a magnificent view of Metropolis City withstanding Winter's blizzard. She was so close she could finally sense him.

I hear his heartbeat: it's racing like an anxious child. But the breathing… it's labored.

It's about to get more so.

"Which door, Raven? The lady or the tiger?"

Raven grabbed one of the conference chairs and hurled it at the window. Just as she thought, it wasn't real. The glass shattered and the view of Metropolis faded. Raven walked through and into Oz's control room.

His voice echoed, but more clear this time, "Clever girl."

He's close. I can feel it.

She walked farther into the control room. It was dark. Raven picked up a mask that looked like the face of Otto Oz off the chair. She heard his voice again.

"'I can't explain myself,' said Alice, 'because... I'm not myself you see.'"

Looking at the mask in her hand, Raven scoffed, "Show yourself."

"After all, you are the guest of honor. Should we have a spot of tea?"

Then there was a gush of smoke out of the ground. Raven heard footsteps walking toward her.

The man that was behind all of this had finally appeared.

If Raven hadn't known better, she would have thought that it was Mad Mod.

However, this man was gruesomely old and hunched over, the wrinkling skin of his face barely holding his bloodshot eyes. His bucked teeth showed from his menacing smile. A small plastic tube was inside his nostril to aid his respiratory systems. It was stationed from inside his jacket, which like all of his clothes, were a size too big.

The feeble old man wore a long, buttoned, blue fabric coat that trailed down past the knee. His light blue pants were rolled up just below the shin because of their length. His hands were covered by white gloves, and in his right he carried a cane used for balance, among other things. He wore shoes that were neatly tied, but hadn't been polished in years. Underneath the coat was a greenish yellow collared shirt, in which the neckline was folded up so that it stuck out to his cheeks. Attached to his shirt was a huge bowtie about a foot in diameter. And resting on his head was a large top hat, with a card tag labeled "10/6" tucked in the side.

Raven's beautiful figure of a body contrasted his frail and abused vessel.

"Who are you?" She finally asked.

The man's bucked teeth protruded even more as he gave a sinister smile.

"A lonely wretch named Jervis Tetch."