Breakdown or not….
Major Damon's POV:
Poor kid she was really desperate, she really thought we were going to send her to jail. We couldn't send her to jail, like what we said earlier she needs help. Help with controlling her drug addiction, help with controlling her anger and most of all help to forget or at least live with the things she had been through. But that started with the reason why she beat the kid up and was completely in rage. Yeah I knew what was behind the anger this time, we all knew, but did she have the strength to say it to us. I double checked my story also with witnesses and they confirmed that he had really threatened to rape her. But was she able to say that, or not. Did we have to tell it for her and how would she react at our confrontation all those questions and only one person who could give us the answers. And that person was a complete mess right now.
MY POV:
I was more calmed down now and major Damon repeated his question again. "What did he say or do to you that made you go off like that?" "I don't want to say it". I said almost crying again. "So he did say or do something to you". "Yeah" I nodded "but I really rather not talk about that". "You know" major Stefan said "that we have to know and we will keep asking you". "Sure but I don't want to talk about it now" I plied. "Ok" major Damon said "this isn't going to work, what if I told you that we know for 99% sure what he said to you". I froze "how would you know" I whispered. "You're playing me right" I said getting angry. "Did I ever do that to you" he asked. He was right he never did something like that he was always; straight, honest and forward with me.
"Then how would you know" I asked with a soft voice. "Major Frank and I had a little talk with the boy you hit". "And after some persuasion he told us what set you of like that". "What he did or in this case what he said". "Yeah but he can be lying for all you know". "That could be a possibility that's why we said 99%, but we asked bystanders and they came to the same conclusion". I turned my head away in my pillow and felt my tears coming up again. "Hey it's ok" major Stefan said, "don't hide". "You are not weak for crying". I didn't turn until I felt major Damon's hands on my shoulder "it's ok" he said. "You don't have to tell us you only have to confirm if what we tell you is true alright" . I doubted for a few seconds but then nodded. "Ok" I said, "I will". "I'm just going to say it straight forward" he said to me. "He said that last week's attack was only the beginning and threatened to rape the fuck out of you". I froze again when the words left major Damon's lips.
I really didn't know what went on in my head anymore, there were so much emotions going through. Anger, rage, shame, fear everything I couldn't say anything. I guess I stared at them for a very long time. My whole past came flying through my mind when I came 'back to earth' again because major Damon pinched my shoulder a little. "You still here" he asked. I nodded and lay my head down on the pillow. Shutting my eyes and trying to shut the whole world out. "Ok" major Damon said, "we will leave you alone so you can rest but I still want my answer, you don't have to open your eyes or say anything just squeeze my hand once if what I told you was the truth if it was not squeeze twice". I was in a daze but when he took my hand I squeezed his once. "Ok" he said, "I'm terribly sorry he said that to you and that you had to hear that he had no right". "I will check up on you in a bit, try to sleep". I nodded in my pillow. And was kind of relieved when they all left. I felt kind of smothered with them all four being there.
Major Damon's POV:
I was really worried now, she was away from the world and this was just the beginning I knew. We had to go back in there and talk everything through step for step. Thereby we had to look into anger management and she had to talk to an staff psychologist. She did something of which we had to make a note to the parole officer she did beat the kid that bad that he was close to dying. She also had to be punished because we couldn't let this behavior go unpunished. So there was isolation and a lot of detention or physical exercise ahead of her. And on top of that she seemed to shut everyone out the only one who could come near to her was me. I was kind of concerned about that. What would happen to her when she was able to get out of here. She was way too attached to me. I knew what the answer was to stopping this right now but I wouldn't do something like that. I promised her I would help her and that I wouldn't give up on her so I couldn't turn my back on her now. I couldn't let others clear the job. I was the one who was supposed to get her through this but it weighted heavy on my shoulders.
All these things where spooking through my head and I knew I had to talk with someone about it else I would explode myself and relapse. And that was something I really couldn't use right now. I was just slightly coming back. So I knocked on the door of my father's room and asked if I could come in. My father was talking with some high people from other boot camps in the neighborhoods. "Sorry" I said, "I didn't know you had company sir". "That's ok son do you need me" he asked me and I knew what he meant. "Yeah" I said "kind of but finish your meeting first I will be in my room and see you afterwards". "Ok son" he said "I will see you a.s.a.p". "Thank you sir" I said. Then I left in search for my brother I really had to talk to someone like right now.
Director Salvatore's POV:
Damn it he looked kind of desperate the sooner I got rite of those people here the better. "That was your son right sir". One of the other directors asked. "Yes I said that's my oldest son". "He's the one who lost his family right". "Yes" I said getting irritated "he's the one who lost his family". "Wow that had to be really tough on him I heard he had a real bad period afterwards". "Yes who wouldn't" I answered. "Of course I totally understand" the other director said. "How is he coping now", "that depends" I said, "one day at the time". "But I can guarantee you he is scarred for life and will never be his old self". The meeting was soon over and I rushed to my sons room as soon as I could.
When I came in his room I saw him talking to his brother. "Sorry" he said "that I disturbed you in your meeting". "That's not a problem son I tried to get out of it a.s.a.p." "Thank you dad" he said. "I really needed to talk because I was afraid I was going to explode and relapse afterwards, but I found my brother and talked with him so I'm feeling a bit better now". "What did you want to talk about" I asked him. "Well I find it hard to handle the situation with cadet Atwood". "I know she has blame in things too". "But it seems everything bad possible the world has falls upon her". "We found out that the kid she attacked had threatened to rape her". "Well" I said "than I can at least understand her reaction a bit but that still doesn't make it alright". "I know" he said "I know". "But you should've seen her an hour ago she was desperate she was afraid we were going to send her to prison and she couldn't even tell us what he said to her". "She couldn't even answer or look at us when we confronted her with what he said". "She had to squeeze my hand to get us an answer".
"Thereby I'm afraid she's too attached to me but I promised her I wouldn't let her down and that I was not going to give up on her". "So I can't take distance but she really needs to learn to trust other people too". "But the questions that are really bothering me are: how are we going to get that anger she has out of her". "Are we going to make her happy again". "And most of all what happens with her when she has no longer the need to stay in this facility". "Son" I said "I hear a lot of concern in your words and I know this is a very difficult situation". "I know you care for her and want the best, but there is not much more you can do". "You are already doing a terrific job". "But let me tell you something you are at this moment five steps ahead of the current situation". "Let's take one step at the time and then look further into the future". "Alright dad" he said "you are right, thank you".
Major Damon's POV:
He is right, one step at the time. And I know right now which step that is going to be. I need her to talk about what happened. Else we can't get further in the process a small thing I'm going to add with that is that she's not going to talk to me alone. I know that is easier for her because she trusts me but I'm going to take my brother. She trusts him a bit already so we are going to take that step for step. I want her to almost completely trust him so she's not that independent from me anymore. If that works with him other majors and people are going to add to that. So she trusts more people. There were a few small things I had to think about though and have that in the back of my head: she is scared of major Frank because he looks like her stepfather, her severe mood swings if she really has a manic depression then she needs to be treated for that. I would have a psychiatrist look for that very soon though. I told my idea to my father and brother and they agreed with me so it was that three hours after our last visit my brother and I stood again for the holding cell of cadet Atwood.
"You ready for this" my brother asked. "Yes I am ready" I said and it wasn't a lie. I really felt ready to get in there. I knew I was probably going to be disappointed afterwards because I couldn't get out of it what I really wanted but if I only got a little improvement I would be happy. And because I was thinking like this right now I probably wouldn't be to disappointed afterwards. Yup this was going to be an success one way or the other I prepared myself good so I couldn't end up in a breakdown myself. I felt kind off secure and thought everything through very well.
MY POV:
I slept for a while but was awake now. I was laying with my eyes closed on the bed, I was really happy that the restrains where off me so I could move myself a bit. I opened my eyes when I heard the door open and there stood major Damon and major Stefan. "How are you doing cadet" major Stefan asked while he sat down at the side of my bed. "I don't know" I said in all honestly. "You know you can calm down now about the whole jail thing right" major Damon said who seated himself down on the edge of the table that stood in the room. "Yes" I said "I'm not scared of that anymore, actually I'm kind of relieved to be honest". "So" major Damon asked "are you ready to talk to us about what happened during physical exercise". I sighed a bit but knew I had to talk about it eventually so I gave in. "Ok" I said "I will talk but I don't know everything exactly anymore". "It's kind of a blur". "That's ok" major Stefan said "just tell us what happened to you when he threatened you". Ok I thought here we go.