Junjo Romantica/Terrorist/Egoist

[ JUNJO HORROR.]

A STALKING HORROR. -inspired by a dream. for a friend

Chapter Twenty-one: Illusion.

a/n: -bows- you guys i am sooo sorry! ! when i first started this fanfic, it was just suppose to be about a maniac killing [or trying?] to kill the junjo characters, hence the horror genre. buuut it turned to some OC thing and I HATE OCs! ! ! even if THEY ARE MINE! ! ! im terrible, yes, but, thank the heavens this is the last flashback chapter! now i can get back to the other characters as well! ! i am so relieved . . . you guys weren't the only ones yanking their hair and yelling " AGGGHH GET THE OCS OUT I WANT MY JUNJO [insert which one] ! " i was doing that also. and what stinks more, well for you guys, is that you don't have the perfect mental image of how they look like! ! so it makes it harder (?) for you guys to like my OCs and or feel compassion for them! ! ;A;

p.s. YES the creepy Nowaki still plays a part in all of this. (i hope i remember what though) all the questions about him and katsuo shall be answered in good ol' violence and rains of bullets, guns and fear. i am excited! i have it al pictured in my head like some actiopn movie thing, except with yaoi and gays. (which is like what some action movies should have, i bet they'd get more box office hits than the normal saving-a-girl/world-w/t guns action movies! ive always wanted to see one of those . . . : )

"- after this broadcast!" exclaimed the anchor woman in the television. I realize I'm lying on a sofa, facing a television. As I move my head to face the television right in front of me, I notice I'm in new clothes. Some new black pants and no shirt. I pull out my right hand from under the thick, white quilt and notice my wrist has been bandaged up. I remember both my wrists had marks of blood and bruises. I slowly lift my hands to my hair; it was wet. Had I taken a shower? Wasn't I in the car? Wait . . . Katsuo. Katsuo! Where is he? !

I suddenly try to sit up, till I feel a throb of pain hit me from behind. I slowly, clenching my teeth, sit up, pulling the white quilt over my naked shoulders from the cold, and notice I was lying on a black towel on top of the couch's cushions.I look around confused, not knowing where I am. This looked like a really pricey apartment room. I was in the living room, surrounded by dark brown walls and a white carpet, a huge plasma television hanging from the wall looking down on me right besides a big, glass sliding door. I slowly walk up to it and decide to slide it open, just a crack. I immediately close it because it was so windy and cold, rain was still pouring down. It was a small balcony with a great view of the city. I slowly walk back to the couch and sit on it gently as I faced the television. I looked at the clock, it says 8 p.m. How many days have passed? I then flinch as I hear a door open. The wooden, main entrance door swings open. I turn nervously to see Katsuo walk inside, with a drenched coat, a black jacket and hood over his head with black sunglasses, holding bags in one hand and a wet umbrella in another. He seems so serious. As he closes the door, he notices me staring at him. His face then lightens up as he takes his glasses off and smiles.

"Your awake already? You must be hungry. I'll go cook right away!" He laughs as he brings the bags to the right of the entrance door, where a kitchen faced the living room and a huge dining table. I nervously look at him as I step close towards him, the quilt still covering most of me.

"W-whe-?"

"We're at my house. I cleaned you up. Its been almost half a day you've been sleeping. I had to be careful when I took you a bath so you wouldn't drown or anything. Its Sunday," he replied as he took off his coat and placed it on a table.

"W-wha? !" I could feel my face redden with embarrassment at the thought of him washing me naked and asleep.

"I considered you being nervous about it but, after that incident, I had to."

"N-no, I don't mind, if its you," I utter. I don't know what to do or say right now. Should I be worried and telling him to report the teenagers to the police? Do I freak about him doing that without my permission? Do I really care? No, I don't. I don't care about anything right now.

"Yuusuke, you have to stop doing that," replied Katsuo as he turned on the gas on the stove. I glance at him taken back.

"You are too honest. You have to care more about consequences. Aren't yo angry? Aren't you upset? Aren't you at least scared? Your suppose to be hitting and cursing at me for leaving you alone in the first place! Aren't you angry at me? WELL? ! !" He yelled at me as he made me step back and recline on the kitchen table. I stared into his angry, sharp dark eyes for a while. I didn't feel anything. But, out of nowhere, I feel my bottleled up sadness and fear rush out of me. I couldn't help but smile AND cry at the same time.

"I guess I was just putting it off for some time. I . . . I don't want to be mad, or scared or sad," I reply, looking away.

"I can't understand why your not angry! They raped you! That's like the worst thing a man can go thru! They were younger than you and tried recording you! They did! Why aren't you!"

"BECAUSE YOU ALREADY DID THAT TO ME! !" I finally yelled, annoyed at him pushing me to get angry. Now I was. I somehow managed to push him to back away from me and stop making me recline back on the kitchen table. Katsuo looked away shyly, probably not knowing how to answer me.

"You already did that! I felt the sheer horror and fear a long time ago! How am I suppose to 'react' like a victim if I've been one! I'm not that scared because I lost all the respect for my body and my feelings a long time ago! T-the only thing that . . . that . . sc-scared me was . . ," I felt my breathing start going a little fast now. I raise my arms to my chest, crossing them as to make myself warmer and seem more compossed as I remember that terrible feeling I felt all those years ago. " I was only scared when they touched me. I . . I've never been . . .t- touched b-because -gasp- I . . ," I covered my red face with my hands, not wanting to look at is expression, " I've been waiting for you to." There, I said it. I could hear him give a little, faint gasp. Probably surprised I said such a comment.

"I can't now," he replied in a whisper, turning around to head back to the kitchen.

What? !

"W-what do you -gasp- mean you can't now? ! K-Katsuo I-!" I can't help but panic. I've waited five long years to finally tell him straight out and full honest how I feel about him and that I wanted him and I . . after all he's said and done . . . he tells me he can't? I don't care how desperate I seem! I want an answer! WHY? ! Why can't you! ? He slid a hand to his head, rubbinghis brow in a stressed manner.

"I . . . I'm afraid that I . . "

What? Afraid what? !

"You can tel me anything! I don't care how outrageous it sounds! I want an answer is all!" I reply angry now.

"Because I don't want to hurt you anymore! !" He yelled back. That's it. He doesn't seem to understand and won't stop holding back. I've had it. I have no more patience. I can't wait any longer.

I don't know if it was a sudden rush of adrenaline, or how angry I was, or just how sex-deprived I've been for 23 years but I . . . I can't take it anymore!

"Y-Yuusuke? !" I shove Katsuo on the wooden floor. The quilt falls down on both of us as I slide myself over his body. I can't believe what I'm doing, what I'm finally doing. I look at him longingly, slide my small hands thru his thin, wet, black slick hair. I let my face, my blushing like mad face hover over his for just ten seconds, as I had my mouth open, breathing calmly in his face, then I take one deep breath and place my mouth over his. The moment couldn't have been more anticipated by now. His stunned expression drasticly changed to pleased as he automaticly ran his warm hands on the sides of my body as we exchanged wet, long, kisses. I can hear us echo in his kitchen. Schlick. Schlick. Schlick. The only noises in the whole room besides our small gasps of air when we were without breath, were our small moans. especially me. I felt embarresed, being the instigator, I had wanted him to be making the most noise, not me. I pull away for a sec, not believing what I had done and what was happening.

"Why are you doing this?" Whispered Katsuo in a low, arousing voice as he pulled his hand up and wiped off the saliva we both had let out on each other's faces. It didn't disgust us. Well me. I don't know if people did that when they usually make-out, or whatever we were doing but, it seems that, when your in the moment, in the 'heat' of the moment, nothing seems repulsive or unsanitary. I used to think the idea of kissing and sex was disgusting but, now . . . now I know what that man had been whispering to my aunt all those years ago. I smile, remembering my aunt and her friend as I myself was busy with my 'friend'.

"Because I don't care if its you," I say, my smile turning to a delicate frown as I feel his hand reach for the front of my pants. I flinch a little, remembering my butt still throbbed in pain from time to time.

"Someone had sex with you," he started as he slid his hand in my pants now. I twitch, because it brought a great, warmth of relief. Just his touch alone made my whoel body throb forward.

"Ahh!"

"I'll let my anger at not being first do the 'talking'," he mumbled as he pressed me closer to him and started to lick the left side of my throat. I moaned again, feeling so overwhelmed. I didn't know what to do now. Its embarresing. I'm the instigator, I should know what to do! I bite my lip, feeling panicked, very panicked and worried all of a sudden. He smiles as he kisses my forehead.

"I'm the seme, remember?" He laughed as he then started unbuttoning his shirt now. I suddenly feel being pressed onto him, onto his chest with my own as he pushed me with his hand that was on my back. Then I remember something, something that had felt so good, despite being done onto me by someone else. I pull myself from on top of him and crawl a little above him, and once I knew my chest was over his face, I slid my right hand under his head and made it press forward on me, on my chest. Now I held myself up with both my arms, my elbows holding both of us up in a low diagnol sitting position. I could hear him laugh almost.

"Why is it that you look so innocent and unkowing of what to do, but deep inside, your a sex-craving human being?" He asked. I blush. He thinks I'm some sex-craving maniac?

"Don't worry, I think its cute," he replies. Im happy. Why don't I smile? Why won't my face let me smile? Why can I only demonstrate how pleased I am right now by making low, moaning sounds? He then starts unzipping my pants. Is this it? Are we . . . are we gonna do it right now?

Then, we are interrupted with a loud bang of thunder shooting across the sky. The lights flicker on and off and when they come back on, for some reason, the volume on the television is louder. So loud, I can't help but to hear what it says.

"Five students killed today in local high school by derranged killer," says an anchorwoman. " They were shot to death in their own school. We have footage of it thanks to the school's camera system. The images you are about to see and hear might be disturbing to some viewers. Not for the weak minded," she said as the screen transitions to a colorful anchor desk to a black-and-white video footage. I see a man coming out of his car, wearing sunglasses, a big black coat, and a white scarf. He looks like the man who tried killing us in the dinner, except his hair was blond and long. This man, however, has short, black slick hair . . . like . . like . .

The camera flashes diffirent angles as it shows seven kids talking. I recognize them. They're . . . they're the same ones from the dinner and the same ones that . . that raped me.

The camera shows them thruought a whole day of school huddled in their little group. Some are obvious they have injuries wrapped up in arms and hands and necks. Then, five of them, after a class, head to a particular classroom as soon as the last bell rings, an dall the other students leave. They're waiting for the other two, the boy with wavy blond hair and the one with black. Where's the short one, Shinobu?

After about ten mintues, they are sitting, talking and laughing, when they look distressed as they hear noises. They freak out. Why? The video then flashes to a man stepping thru a hallway, not caring whether he is discreet or not, as he steps in, a trail of mud and water from the pouring rain outside, as he holds a gun, two actually, one in each hand, on his sides heading for the classroom. He stand in front of the door. On the other side, the teenagers seem panicked. Why? The man had made two warning shots. Maybe they thought it was fake or something. Then, the man suddenly kicks the door open. The five teenagers look at him horrified as he raises both guns in oposite directions where the teenagers had headed for, before they could even question his presence or negotiate with the man, he starts to mercelessly shoot at them. He kills all five. He looks around, seeing as they thud on the floor, then he checks their faces and shoot them in the forehead just in case he left them alive. After 30 seconds of inspecting, he decides to leave. He starts laughing as he walks out. Still unnoticed, he walks out of the school, into the rain and back into his dark colored car. The footage makes a static jump and then out of nowhere there's color to the footage. The man walks into a dark-blue porsche and drives away. I stare blankly for a long time. That man was . . was . . . .

"We could not catch a positive ID on the murderer's car or himself. Please, if you know anything, please call the hotline number at the bottom of the screen, at-"

Suddenly, I felt being shoved on my back as Katsuo turns me over. He is looking down at my face in a serious way. It scares me.

"So, what do you think?" He says in a deep voice.

"H-huh?" Is all I can patheticly manage to utter as I look at him. He slides his hand on my cheek. I feel terribly cold now, the quilt not covering my shoulders anymore.

"I guess I should have kept pretending to be Katsuo then." He smiled.

"W-hat are you tal-?"

"Katsuo hasn't been talking to you this whole time. I have. Since you woke up."

"Y-your not Katsuo? But then-?"

"My name is Nowaki. I am dead and can posses him every five years for five days. I am the boy who confessed my love for him and got rejected. I killed myself and Kathy helped me come back and stay with him, literaly. You could see me back then. Remember? I always told you how much I wanted you dead." I feel sheer fear and panic consume me. Katsuo, no, this isn't Katsuo, this is that boy in the dark hood I would see always around him. This is that Nowaki he talked about. The one that won't leave him alone and terrified him.

"G-get off! !" I manage to slide from under him and meekly step back, my lower region starting to throb again. I can hear him laugh, making fun of me as he stood up.

"You must really be a virgin and so innocent minded. You got raped, correct? Such a poor job at fighting back. Katsuo has to do all the fighting for you it seems. I got frustrated and decided to come out for a while."

"You made him kill them! Why? ! Why are you doing this? ! Your dead! You have to go away! You can't disturb his life and just-!" He suddenly lunged to me, grabbed my right shoulder and shoved me to the floor.

"AHHH!" I yell, feeling a throb of pain hit my back. He's laughing, he's laughing and smiling all too proudly and satisfied.

"I got rejected. You haven't. You won't. I know it! Why does he like you but not me? ! I knew him longer, I knew him better! He only started hanging out with you because of a fucking bet! I won't go away. I never will. Not till I'm satisfied! I want to be happy! I wanted to be happy! He rejected me, I love and idolized him! To me, he was the greatest person I've ever met! I was so sad and alone, I killed myself! Of course, he was there and Kathy too. They helped me unknowingly or not, to bind my soul to his, so no matter what, I can always stay with him forever! I love him! I won't go till I'm satisfied! And I won't let anyone else come in between us! ! Hear me? ! I thought of killing you, but, I want anyoen who would love him to reject him and hurt hm badly, just like he had me! I want him to feel my pain, and I want him all to myself! Go away? Hah! Disturbing his life? Why, have you not noticed? YOU'RE disturbing his life too! ! Besides, you stupid boy, he can do better than you! Can you do the world a favor and write desperate on your forehead? You are so defenseless and never turn down help. You always expect to have someone to rely or fall back on. You use people! Your the most defenseless, cowardly and delicate person I know!" He starts to hiss angrily as he shakes me visciously.

"S-so are -pant- you," I utter thru my clenching teeth in pain. He shoves me harshly to the ground as he walks off.

"Don't you dare tempt me to kill you now you little fuck. You don't even know you've been ass raped and given blow jobs by your rapists! Oh how badly Katsuo just wanted to slap you when you didn't say anything about it. He wanted to so bad. Did he? Noo. He loves you too much!" He muttered as he buttoned up his shirt and put on his coat. I stare at him struggling as I get up with shaking legs.

"Don't worry though, he was talking to you when you came onto him a while ago. I lied. I took over whenever he tried remembering I ever talked to him or what happened there. I can mess with his memories you know? I can also mess with yours. I will too. I don't want you to remember this conversation. To the count of five, you will forget I ever talked to you and only remember the part of seeing Katsuo on the television murdering those children, and you will forget all about ME, Nowaki, and these past hours before that will be a hazy memory. You will never remember me until I speak to you when I'm in control again. Until then, little fuck." He smiled as he pointed his hand at me with an L like some sort of gun. I stared at it horrified. If he can posses and kill people, what else could he do?

"Sleep lit-tle flower," he said as his voice returned to normal. I feel myself go numb. I slump on the floor. I try reaching for him. I can't. I'm so tired and sleepy.

"Five. Four. Three-"

"What are you going to do now, Nowaki?"

"Two. What else? One. Let Katsuo kill the other three fucks. He was horribly angry, so with my hate, he was pushed to the intent of killing. You know what they say, hate and hate makes more hate!"

"So . . . he wouldn't kill if it weren't for you?"

"Nope. He wouldn't have. One."

I felt my eyes close as he opened the door and left.

a/n: Next chapter will (i pray!) will be the end of the flashback saga. (FINALLY) im tired of flashbacks. -.-U

review! the more reviews, the more motivated i will be to finish this! C :