Guys, readers, those of you losing your shit over the last chapter, bear in mind I don't write what I don't know and what I don't research. I have a kid with Downs. If you got your knickers in a twist over what I wrote about them being told to selectively abort the kid, get them untwisted, its what I got told, its what new parents get told every day. The pressure to abort a Downs kid is huge. End of rant. it's a humor story. The angst is almost over. My son brought the funny within the first 10 minutes of his life when he pissed all over everyone in the delivery room. They are life changers in a lot of ways, most of them good. Now, back to the story and soon to the funny though this one is still a little tough.
"What the hell do you mean, "Selectively reduce the pregnancy", Carlisle? How the hell does that work? Do you mean get rid of him?"
"Jasper, he is very likely to have issues that you aren't going to be prepared to deal with, things like mental retardation, physical delays as well as all kinds of problems that we wont know the scale of until he's born. He will never lead a normal life and you might end up having to care for him his entire life. Are you ready for that?"
Jpov
I'm going to punch him. I am going to punch my uncle in the face and then I'm going to call my momma and tell her and she will probably tell me to do it again. How can he tell us to get rid of him? He's an educated doctor! He knows that there is such a range of possibilities with Downs. He might be severely disabled, that is true, but then again he might be almost normal. Its not in our hands. I do know that this is time I have to stand up and do the right thing. I was lucky enough to have worked with a man who had Downs on a movie and it changed me. He was amazing and kind and just the sweetest guy. Yeah, it would be a challenge, but it wouldn't be the end of the world. We have family and friends who want to be involved, so lets let them get involved. He will have sisters who will love having a brother to spoil as well.
"Shut UP! You aren't going to do anything to him. He will be fine and if you hurt him, I will beat you down and then I will call momma and she will come up here and put a boot so far up your ass you will taste boot leather! Just shut the fuck up! You aren't hurting him!"
Bpov
By the way everyone jumped, you could tell we did not expect that reaction from him. Carlisle actually leaned back in the chair to get away from him. He didn't understand. Raising multiples, let alone one with a disability was going to be a huge task. They were all likely to be preemies, and now him with the added burden of Downs? That was making some really huge odds. Jasper tore out of the room with Em hot on his heels, I hope like hell not to beat on him again, as Carlisle started telling me what the chances for the other two babies would be for having the pregnancy go longer if we reduced by one. Jasper was not a practical thinker, and this situation called for practical thinking. I know he wanted a son, but he was young and could have a son down the road that might not have this disability. I didn't relish the idea of it anymore than anyone else, but I wanted to provide the best possible chances for the healthy babies. I didn't know what to do and Jasper was ruled by his emotions, so I needed to make informed decisions, and soon because there was a limited window where choices, as agonizing as they were, could be made.
Empov
Oh dude! What the hell? I did not expect that from him. Defending the lil guy even though he's going to be special? Man! He just became 100% okay in my books. I have to make sure he knows I have his back with this one. I'm on his side. We can do this, the little guy will be fine. We will look out for him.
"Jasper! Dude! Wait the fuck up!"
"What? Do you want to kick my ass? Well, just go the fuck ahead! I don't give a fuck anymore! I'm not going to let them hurt him! I don't care if you beat my ass into the ground, Ill fight all of you!"
"Dude! Chill the fuck out! I'm on your side." Oh whoa…he's crying? That sucks.
"Jasper, man? Its going to be okay. We will convince them." Oh…he's a hugger? I guess that's okay, as long as no one is looking. Poor dude. I feel bad for beating up on him so much now. He might have been a dick at times, but he's actually been okay lately with mom, maybe he just needed time to figure himself out.
Jpov
Its my fault! All the shit I had done, all the crap I had taken and drank and done to my body had screwed up my swimmers and now my son was paying the price for it. I couldn't let it cost him his life. I had to make this right.
"Em, please! Help me convince her? I have to make this right. Its all my fault and its just not fair that he pays for it. Please?"
Empov
His fault? How the hell was it his fault? I had no idea what he was talking about, but I was going to help him. I would support him and talk to my mom. I was really shocked that Carlisle was telling her to get rid of the lil dude like that. I mean, what the hell? He has to know if there is stuff that can be done other than that. Its not like the lil guy was going to be born with something that was going to kill us all or him, so what if he was going to be slow? I knew a guy with Downs who was the brother of one of my skating buddies. He couldn't skate for shit but he would mess your ass up in Tae kwon do and he even played drums. He was funny as hell and told the worst dirty jokes I have ever heard. I wasn't worried about having a sibling with it, Jasper wasn't ready to give up on having him as a son even if he had it, and I had a feeling Ed would be on our side as well and I KNOW for a fact my aunt would lose her mind if she found out mom was even considering getting rid of a baby, for any reason, when she had been so desperate to have a baby. We could win this, but Jasper had to get his shit together.
"Jasper, come with me. This is not over by a long shot. We are going to go talk to mom, and then if she wont listen, we are going to make some phone calls. So get your shit pulled together man, come on, its going to be okay, I promise you nobody is doing anything to my little brother."
Jpov
Em's on my side in this? Oh thank God for small favors. If he had been against me it would have been a done deal. I can tell by the stubborn set of his jaw and the way he's squaring up his shoulders, I wont need to call momma to get uncs ass kicked if he keeps pushing to get rid of my boy.
When we walk back inside, he puts his arm around my shoulder and he stands there right next to me in front of Bella as I begin to plead for my son.
"Bella, please. Listen to me. I will do whatever you want, I will do whatever it takes to help you out, but please, don't get rid of my son. I know you are scared and worried about what all could be wrong, and I am sorry I did that to him, its my fault and its not fair."
"What? What do you mean by that? How could you have had anything to do with him having Downs, Jasper?" She reaches up and catches my hand and pulls me to her, wrapping me up in a hug, and I cant help it, I lose my shit, crying as hard as I ever have in my life, sorry and sad and scared for him, scared that im not going to be able to convince her to hear me, and that I am going to bear this sorrow forever, knowing that its my fault I cost my son his life.
"All the drinking and shit I did, all the stupidity and not taking care of myself messed things up. Its all my fault."
"NO! It absolutely is NOT! Jasper! You listen to me and you listen well. This had nothing to do with anything either one of you did or didn't do. It just happens. It can happen to anyone, be they rich, poor, white, black. It just happens. They haven't found a real rhyme or reason, just that it appears more often in pregnancy of those under 18 and increases as a woman ages over 35."
Carlisle was on his knees in front of us looking more serious than I've ever seen him look, but I still wanted to kick him because I didn't believe him. He was just trying to make me feel better so I would go along with what he wanted.
"Huh…kinda like homosexuality? Did you know they were saying on the news the other day that there were folks who had been looking for the gene that causes homosexuality, and if they find that, just imagine all the people that would have been and could be "selectively reduced" if their parents had known in advance, I know for sure I damn well wouldn't be here. Maybe we mess around a little too much with stuff sometimes Carlisle."
We all turned and looked at Eddie. He had sat there the entire time looking like he was doing a lot of thinking but not any talking, and I had never been so glad in my life to hear him speak up for once, because I saw Carlisle break. He knew Ed was right. He had been disowned by his family and even though he and Carlisle had been together longer than most of the straight couples in Eddies family, they had never responded to his attempts to reestablish contact, he had been discarded.
"Oh honey, I didn't know this would be something that would be such a hard thing for you. He's never going to be like other children. He might be severely retarded or have other issues."
"Bella, I know and we will deal with it and if you don't want to deal with it, I will deal with him on my own. Please, just give me that option. I worked with a guy who had Downs and Bella, he was the coolest guy. We don't know and we wont know what he can and cant do if we don't ever give him a chance. If you need more help around here, I will be more help. If you need more money, I will get you money. If you need anything, I will get it, but please, just don't get rid of him. Do you want to get married? I will marry you now."
Bpov
He is just full of surprises today. I had frankly expected him to run for the hills the moment we were having triplets, and then we find out we are having one with a disability that has such a stigma attached to it that would be sure to be a shot to his ego, and instead of going with what would be the easy way out, he is standing here ready to fight tooth and nail for the child's very survival? And then just when I think there aren't anymore surprises looming on the horizon, I get a proposal? Granted, it's a half-assed proposal that is obviously given under duress, but still!
"No. Jasper, You are overwrought right now and I am not going to even consider that a legitimate proposal. But, sweetheart, if you are really sure?"
"Yes! Please Bella! Please! Lets keep him. We can do this. We will all help you, wont we?"
Whoa…that was quite a glare he shot to Carlisle, who didn't even hesitate in his nod of support.
"Mom, I promise you, I will do anything to be a good big brother to all of them, and if anyone ever gives him a hard time, I will be there to help him out. Don't worry, he will be fine."
"Okay then, we will keep them all. Oooof! Unless of course you all squeeze them out of me."
Cpov
I know they all see me as the bad guy right now, but it had to be said. I have seen the best outcomes and the worst outcomes. I didn't want one child who wouldn't have a normal life to put my friend at risk of losing hers or her other babies, but Eddie was right, they were getting closer and closer to figuring out what genetic links there were to all kinds of things, and while this little boy might be slower than some and do things differently, the rest of the tests hadn't indicated anything else wrong with him, so I had been advocating getting rid of him just because he was different, just like I was, "Different" because I knew there were just as many people who would want to get rid of me for my difference.
"Bella, I respect the decision you guys have made and I hope you know you guys have my support and help every step of the way. Jasper, son, Please? Listen to me, you didn't do this. I am going to bring you some things to read in the next few days about Downs Syndrome, it will give you an idea about what to expect and how you can help him and Bella, okay? Please don't see me as the enemy? Its not personal against him, I just worry about anyone in your situation. Bella is likely to end up on bed rest pretty early on and we are going to have to keep her stress level down. Have you given a thought to where you are going to live? How you are going to support them? You don't even have a job or an education. Its not cheap to support a child with a lifelong disability, and while it seems like a long ways away now, you have to consider the fact that you are going to have to be responsible for him his entire life, and with good medical care, men with Downs are living into their 60's, so he might even outlive you. I can tell with almost 100% certainty he is going to need glasses and more specialized dental care and probably thyroid support. There are a whole range of common health issues that we will have to be prepared to address, and I can handle most of them, but Bella, I know you had wanted to move to Texas to be nearer to your sister, and while I respect that, one of the premier facilities for the care and support of children and adults with Downs is here in Portland up at Doernbecher Children's Hospital, so while I know you really want to move, I think it would be best to stay here until at least after he is born and evaluated, though you will need a bigger place."
Bpov
"Carlisle, money isn't really an issue. Seriously, we have enough money to take care of things. Jasper has time to figure things out. I have talked to corporate and there are options for me with them or I can take leave until after they are born. I have the savings. Right now, lets just take this one day at a time and one step at a time until things are further along. I agree that staying in Portland is probably for the best. Maybe I will be able to finally pry my sis out of Texas, I've been trying for decades, but for now, I am tired and I want to go lay down and take a nap if that's okay?
They all nod or hug me, and head for the door to go get food except for Jasper, he standing there looking like he's fought the battle of his life, weary and not sure where to turn, so I walk over to him and take his hand, "Come on young man, lets go take a nap together, I think we are going to need to get all the rest we can before this adventure gets the best of us. We have to rest to grow these babies big, and looking at the size of you, I should probably be sleeping 24/7 for the rest of the pregnancy to give them a fighting chance at runt size."
Jpov
She cracked a joke? She's taking me to bed with her,(so what if its for a nap?), and she just cracked a joke? She's giving me a chance? I really, seriously, cannot fuck this up, can I? Oh my God. What the hell am I going to do now? I have someone counting on me and lives depending on it. For once in my life, something I am doing really does mean life and death.