Author's Notes: Warning: Attempted suicide and a ton more angst.

I was going to write more here but then I couldn't decide what, so I better just post the chapter.

Fixing the Broken

Laes tried knocking on a couple doors along the hallway, and he was happy when the guy with the four arms replied.

"Sorry to bother you again," Laes apologized. "I was just wondering if you knew where Lard Nar's room is."

"It's four doors down, that way," the crew member responded, gesturing the way Laes had come. "It's on the right… but apparently he's not talking to anyone right now."

"Yeah, I'm pretty used to that," Laes admitted before starting in that direction. "Thanks!"

He counted the doors as he walked along. One. Two. Three. This one. He double-checked to make sure it was on the right too. Why had it felt so far away before? Dev must have really drugged him good the first day he was here.

Tap tap tap tap

Ok… why did this door sound different compared to the other two? It looked exactly the same as the rest of them, but it didn't sound metallic. Was it made out of something else and just painted to look like a metal door?

This mystery could wait until later… Lard Nar wasn't answering. Either his former cellmate decided to take an oath of silence, or maybe this was the wrong room. That would be kind of embarrassing.

TAP TAP

He tried knocking louder. "Lard Nar?" he questioned; his voice doing nothing to mask his concern. "Please talk to me so it doesn't look like I'm standing out here talking to myself."

Again he waited… and again there was no answer. Laes sighed and rested his forehead against the cool door. Then he glanced over at the keypad. It had been a long long time since he'd hacked into anything: grade school on a dare if he remembered correctly... twice. Yeah, that had been a while ago.

Oh well. It was worth a try.

"Look um, I'm probably going to hack your door if you don't answer," Laes warned him. It was only fair he give his former cellmate a warning before he barged in. He didn't hear a response or any movement, so he turned his attention to the keypad. Ok… he could do this… "I'm not bluffing!" he tried, hoping Lard Nar would save him from the frustration of trying to figure out the password.

And… nope. He was going to have to do this.

The first thing he did was check to see if there were visible wear marks on the number keys themselves. There wasn't any. That was a bummer.

"Ok… here I go," he said as a final warning before his fingers began prying at the metallic case. If he had the proper device it would only take him a minute: some kind of tracer that could figure out the different charges and their frequency. . An electronic disruptor would have also worked. He didn't have either of those, so he was going to have to eye-ball it and hope for the best.

The metal cover came loose, but it took a while to pry it off. He lost his grip and it clattered noisily to the floor. This would've been easier with both hands…

Then he began peeling off the part covering the number keys. Each one had a press point underneath, and he was hoping he'd be able to see the wear on these. He looked at it from the bottom and then from the side. Hopefully Lard Nar wasn't in the habit of frequently changing his pass-code.

Laes didn't really want to get into the wiring since it would be a bit more complicated fixing it later. He closed his eyes and lightly ran his fingers over all of the pressure points. He'd seen a slight difference in the two and six section, so Lard Nar apparently favoured those numbers the most. He still had to figure out three more though… unless there was two of one or the other. At least he'd narrowed it down. Hopefully this wasn't the kind of device that would lock him out after a couple failed attempts.

"What are you doing?" a robotic voice questioned him from behind.

Laes' concentration immediately broke, and he spun around to face the brain robot guy. Oh boy… he chewed his lip and hid his good arm behind his back. He'd just been caught hacking. This brought back memories of when he got caught in grade school and the reason why he promised never to hack again.

"I uhh…" he glanced sideways, hoping maybe he could find an excuse written in the walls somewhere. That would have been very helpful, but there weren't any words there at all, and his brain was doing a terrible job of making its own.

"What are you doing…?" the voice from the suit questioned again. There was a speaker or something on the front of it. Laes looked at where the voice had come from before returning his attention to the floating brain.

"I was just… I mean he wasn't answering so…" he thought it would have been totally acceptable to bust the keypad open, figure out the code, and forcibly get inside. He couldn't say it like that…

A large robotic hand reached for him and he panicked a bit. He covered his head with his good arm and shrank against the wall. "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to… well I mean it wasn't an accident, but I didn't mean to get caught which is why it's totally understandable if you're angry at me for doing this without asking if it was ok or not…" he rambled the same way he did when one of those zappy sticks were pointed at him.

The robotic suit with the floating brain took a step back in what was probably surprise? "Calm down. I am not going to hurt you."

Right… he needed to calm down. He took a deep breath and slowly exhaled as he straightened up. Ok, that had been a bit embarrassing and awkward. It was good to know his cower response was still well and active, but he wished it hadn't caused him to panic quite so dramatically.

"Sorry," Laes apologized.

"No, I entered your personal space without telling you my intentions. This was my fault."

"But I was the one who was standing in the hallway wrecking Lard Nar's security thing, so of course you'd want to know what I was up to," Laes remarked as he fidgeted with his sling. "I overreacted… it's totally not your fault you're large and intimidating." Oh cripes. He wanted to bury his head in shame. He really needed to think about what he needed to keep in his head before it came out of his mouth.

"I understand…" the brain robot held its hand in front of what Laes assumed were its visual sensors. "I was attempting to extend my hand in greeting, but I can see how my previous question might have made this seem threatening instead… please accept my apology for the misunderstanding."

"Oh jeez…" He covered his face with his hand. He really had overreacted. "I'm really sorry about that…" Well, at least he hadn't automatically fainted. That would have been an even worse response. The bulky metal robot body reminded him of the Irken guards' armour, which was why his brain decided to forget all reason and just panic instead.

"I accept your apology," the voice was hallow and devoid of any emotion. "Now, you were trying to enter the boss' room correct?"

"Uh… yes?"

"I can offer you an easier solution to your problem if you like."

"Um… sure. That would be good. Thanks."

The floating brain brought its metal body closer to the keypad. Then it reached out its hand and grasped the device firmly. Its body sparked and electricity ran up its arm and into its large metal hand. The keypad flashed before the screen faded to black.

"There. It should restart its self in one minute," this member of the Resisty explained. "Until then you can use the door as you please."

This is why hacking was more of a computer thing nowadays. Disruptors almost always worked better than manual hacking...

Laes took a step forward. The door glided open, and he turned to smile at the brain. "Thanks, I uh, guess I owe you one."

"You do not owe me anything," the brain informed him. It didn't seem interested in following him inside. That was probably for the best. As far as he knew Lard Nar had refused to see anyone besides him and Dev since his return to the ship.

The door clicked shut behind him, and he could tell right away something was wrong. It was like a heavy feeling in the pit of his stomach that for once probably wasn't stress related nausea. He slowly approached the bed, and his eyes widened when he saw all of the blood on everything. His brain immediately reacted by making his vision blur and his body weaken. He managed to stagger forward a bit before collapsing.

"Lard Nar…" he mumbled as he grabbed a hold of the blanket and tried to haul himself up off the floor. "You… you… what did you do…?"

He passed out before he could say or do anything else.

Dev sat at one of the monitors keeping an eye on the galactic map and noting where the Resisty was moving. They'd been flying non-stop for the past few days. Apparently they hadn't agreed on where to set up their next base of operations. From what he could tell they seemed to have been following the expansion of the Irken Empire, but now they were moving inwards, back towards a group of already conquered planets.

He rubbed one of his eyes. Maybe he should have tried napping earlier…

Then he heard the doors to the control room glide open. He glanced over at them, not really caring who was entering the room. The crew members on board with no distinct roles were constantly in and out. This time it was the floating brain, but it made sense this crew member would be here because this crew member was usually sitting at one of the monitors.

His eyes flicked back to the small screen in front of him. He'd already gotten a good grasp of the layout of the ship. He knew what was in each room, and he knew how easy it would be to obtain access to the power core.

"Excuse me Dev," the robotic voice from the brain's machine droned. That voice had a familiar quality to it.

"Yes?" Dev questioned, looking up at the crew member who stopped right next to his seat.

"I require your assistance."

"Sorry, I don't do repairs on mechanical bodies," Dev told him as he leaned back a bit.

"I am not talking about myself. I am talking about Lard Nar and the other person of your species," the floating brain informed him.

His chest constricted as he immediately pushed his chair away from the desk and stood up. He couldn't decide how serious the brain was because it didn't have any facial expressions, and its voice also lacked any emotion.

"Is everything alright?" Drent asked from the captain's seat.

"Well my sensors indicated that there could have been a serious…" the floating brain began, but it was cut off when Dev elbowed its speaker. Then he grabbed the brain's mechanical hand and hauled him out of the room.

"Don't just blurt out everything in front of people who could easily panic," Dev told the brain when they were out in the hallway.

"But the captain asked me a question, and as a subordinate I should respond," the brain logically concluded.

Dev heaved a sigh and ran a hand down his face. "Where is the problem?"

"Would you like me to tell you verbally? Or would you like me to show you?"

Before answering, Dev took a quick look up and down the hallway. There were a couple of those grinning slug creatures watching them. He wasn't too sure how much that would matter, but he decided he'd rather be safe and keep verbal communication to a minimum.

"Just show me," he said.

He felt himself become more anxious as they approached Lard Nar's room. He noticed the keypad had been tampered with and made a guess that Laes had likely tried to get into the room.

Lard Nar had locked himself inside. If Dev wanted to, he could have forced the doors open… but then he hadn't really wanted to draw attention to himself, so he opted to give the former leader of the resistance a bit more time and space to recover on his own.

He knew Lard Nar was not doing very well mentally. He'd weighed that in his mind time and time again… but he never really understood how Vortians and other creatures with worn or elevated emotions could react in a way that didn't make logical sense.

The leader of the Resisty was with his crew again. Shouldn't he be happy about that? At the very least being away from the prison and among people he knew should have given him a sense of relief.

That's why after the brain got the door open, and Dev saw what he saw, his mind blanked for a moment. This didn't make any sense. He hurried over to the bedside and grabbed Laes by his good shoulder. "Laes…" he shook the unconscious Vortian gently. "Wake up."

"Mmh…" Laes groaned a little, but he didn't stir.

"Laes…" Dev tried again. He let out a sigh. It was no use. Besides, as long as there was blood around Laes would only end up fainting again.

Dev dragged the unconscious Vortian over to a spot near the door and propped him up against the wall before returning his attention to Lard Nar. How could something bleed so much and still be alive? He walked over to the blood-covered bed and took one of Lard Nar's sliced up arms. He held it out so he could see exactly what the damage was. The lacerations were deep and they were still bleeding even though some of the blood around the wound and on the blanket was already mostly dry.

"You're not making this job any easier than you made my last one…" Dev muttered to himself. He noticed the cause of the gashes twisted up in the blanket. It was a jagged piece of metal with the sharp edge coated in blood. He picked it up and placed it in his pocket. Where the heck had Lard Nar gotten this from? The desk and the bed both looked fine. Maybe it was from a device or something he'd kept hidden somewhere… maybe under the bed?

Lard Nar had used it on both of his arms. He was still breathing, but it was shallow and he was very pale. He was probably in shock. Just how long had he been bleeding out?

Dev ran a hand over his head. He'd seen injuries like this sure… but they'd never been self-inflicted. Helk… he needed bandages. He should just keep a supply of them in his pockets or something.

"Oww... my head…" Laes mumbled as he raised his good hand to hold his aching head. Did he smack it on the floor or something...? His eyes slowly opened. Everything was blurry. He blinked, hoping to clear his vision. His sight wasn't coming back as fast as he wanted it to. "What happened…?"

"Lard Nar sliced up his arms with a piece of metal," Dev responded, and Laes turned to look at the other Vortian, but all he saw was a fuzzy shape. Huh. Was that red stuff…? Oh galre please be ketchup... "Don't look at me Laes… I'm covered in his blood right now."

Laes' eyes quickly found a suitable spot to stare at on the ceiling. He was beginning to remember where he was and why he was there. He squeezed his eyes closed when he recalled all of the blood and Lard Nar lying there motionless with his arms sliced up. That must have really hurt.

"Is he… is he still alive…?" Laes asked.

"Yeah… I've cleaned and bandaged his arms…" Dev told him. His voice sounded strangely monotone. Of course the sight of Lard Nar lying in all of that blood would have shocked anyone. "He lost a lot of blood. Hopefully he'll get better with some rest."

"Is he going to do it again you think?" Laes questioned the other Vortian worriedly.

"Not if I can help it… I'll watch him to make sure he won't."

If the circumstances had been different, Laes would have made a joke about how creepy and stalkerish that sounded. The situation was very serious though. Lard Nar actually wanted to die badly enough that he would try to kill himself if he had the chance. Honestly Laes wasn't too sure what to think about that. He hugged himself with his good arm.

Then another idea entered his mind. He tried to block it out, but it only got louder. It said 'if Lard Nar wanted to die, what right did they have to stop him?' The former captain, and leader of the Resisty, had locked himself in his room and slashed his arms up with a piece of random metal. Obviously his intention was to die… if someone was willing to go to that extent, was keeping them alive just being cruel?

No. Laes couldn't let himself think that way. Life was good no matter how many horrible things happened in it. He still wanted to see the stars, and have a family, and maybe reunite with his parents if they were still alive. That's why losing his hand and getting tortured wouldn't and couldn't slow him down.

Well, technically it slowed him down, but it wouldn't stop him. If Lard Nar could stop blocking everyone out… if he could grasp onto some kind of hope for the future then maybe he would be able to see something worth living for too.

"I think I should stay with him…" Laes suggested after a while. "No one else can understand what he went through better than I can right? Not that I'm trying to sound like a know-it-all, but we were both forced into that virtual world. He lost an eye and I lost a hand… we also spent huge chunks of time staring at the electrical force-field daydreaming about food. Well... maybe I was the one daydreaming about food. He didn't always say what he was thinking about…"

He was probably thinking about dying Laes realized. Oh Galre... had Lard Nar been thinking about killing himself the whole time they were in prison together?

"Yeah… it might be better if you stayed and watched him…" Dev easily relented. "I've barely talked to the guy, so it'd be a bit awkward if I started hanging around."

"He barely talked to me at first too," Laes encouraged the other Vortian with a weary smile. He even risked glancing at him, but he had to turn away because of the blood. "It's nothing personal." Come to think of it… he didn't really know much about Dev at all.

"So… um... who are you Dev?" he asked. This was how Juelee asked about people, and he thought it would be kind of interesting to give it a try.

There was a bit of a pause. "What do you mean…?" Dev questioned in surprise probably.

"I just want to know more about you," Laes hurriedly explained. Was the other Vortian upset? "Like, do you have any family? What school did you study at? Do you have any hobbies?" He listed, hoping to ease the tension without knowing why it was there.

Dev sighed. "I've been on my own for a while… I studied but I never excelled at anything, and my interests… I'm not too sure. I guess I like helping out where I can."

"Maybe once everything calms down you can study medicine," Laes suggested. "I mean you're pretty good at patching people up anyway… and you seem to know how to give the right amounts of medication."

"That was through trial and error," Dev responded wryly. "I accidentally gave you a bit too much on the first day remember?"

"Learning through trial and error isn't a bad thing," Laes said. "Sometimes it's the best way to learn something you know?"

"Yeah, I guess so…" Dev agreed. "I'm going to go wash up a bit. Lard Nar is dehydrated so I'll be back with some water. I'll try to give him some as soon as he wakes up."

"Ok, yeah," Laes agreed with a small nod. He listened as Dev stepped out of the room. That's funny… it didn't sound like the other Vortian's boots made that clacking sound anymore… was he wearing different boots?

More Author's notes: You know the saying "things get worse before they get better?" Well sometimes things get worse, and then they get even more terrible, and then finally maybe eventually they start getting better, and then they get worse again. Then better. Emotions and experiences don't make a very neat line graph. Instead it often looks like a toddler scribbling all over a graph paper... or something. That's been my experience anyway.