A/N: I have the daunting task of finishing this now. (but obviously I'm not doing anything this summer, I've never worked a day in my life sooo right now I'm writing fanfiction and going to pool parties for a living! I'm such a productive member of society, I know!) There are approximately 3 more chapters, the last two I am currently still working on.
I am very exited to show them to you, I think they will be among the best pieces. Hopefully it will be all finished this weekend. ONWARD! And brace yourself…
I saw Ari briefly once more after he came to see us with his motorcycle. Ari was in Tel Aviv for a day only to receive orders from Eli and the prognosis, apparently wasn't promising. I gathered that I would not see him for a very, very long time and he couldn't face me. He was running because he didn't want to accept that this was what I was doomed for too one day soon and there was nothing he could do.
When Ari left for good I was falling apart; I didn't know what to do anymore. The realization that no one could survive with my optimism in my world had crashed into me, causing me to have a rather large crisis of faith. My optimism had slowly but surely flickered out.
I wanted to love people that would not let me. Ziva wasn't there to see most of it, for that I suppose I am thankful. She will remember me as a whole person for the most part, not troubled and broken.
"You don't get to leave me!" I was sobbing and trying to yell over the noise of arriving and departing planes. The sound of the rain hitting the pavement did not help either. "Ziva can go play soldier, and father can treat me like one, but you? You cannot leave me here!" I said, pushing my hair around wildly. The customary Tel Aviv thunderstorms were coming. I hated them; the harsh light and the ruthless noise made me feel insecure no matter where I was. He had to depart now or take his chances with the coming storm.
"You're being ridiculous." He said coldly, as though he had never known me at all.
"Don't you realize what will happen to me? He will turn me into an assassin; he will encourage me to join Kidon until I have no other choice! I don't want to live like that!"
"You already do." He said steadily. "He has handed me a death sentence and ordered me to live through it. And I will. I never wanted this, Tali, please know that. What choice did we ever have? You may already have no where to turn, but you are a runner- I am my father's son. One day I will get my chance."
"What about me?" I screamed without thinking.
"When you can, run. Run far away from this place and forget everything that has ever happened, everything that Eli has ever done to you. I cannot help you."
"Have I ever mattered?" I said with anguished tears beginning to spill from my eyes.
He does not answer.
"Then what does?" I whispered.
"Revenge matters." He said candidly.
I looked him in the eye and I cried. "Please, please, don't do this to me. Father has only ever wanted what is best for us; he just has a creative way of showing it! You don't need to leave! This doesn't mean…"
"This is what I was made for Tali. I have been trained for his since I was 5. Although you may not think so, you are his favorite. You are being spared for longer than me." He said briskly. "I won't be back for a very long time. You have never deserved having all these issues being thrust upon you. Out of everyone in the world you probably knew the most about me."
"Then why do I feel like I don't know shit about you?"
"You suspect things." He pointed out. "You have always been observant, Tali, and the ability to make educated guess about who I am and what I do- how I feel- is much more than anyone else could ever hope for. I don't want you to get hurt, and I don't want to have to hurt you." He turned and started to walk toward his plane.
I sunk to the ground on the already sopping wet tarmac."Ari!" I screamed in vain. I sat there long after his flight left, long after the rain had stopped, but not before our conversation, and his voice, had stopped echoing in my head.
Wow! I got 45 new visitors and nearly 300 new hit from the time I passed out at 4am until noon! Thanks so much everyone! hope you are enjoying it!
In case you were wondering, I have tried, but I just can't write stories that aren't dark. Even if I try not to. I would write fluffy shipper stories if I could, but alas, it would probably just turn out to be some sort of morose comedy.