Sorry for the slight delay in posting this. My husband was sick all weekend and then I had Easter to prepare for and those two things took up my free time. I still did not get as far as I wanted to with this chapter but I wanted to post something for you to read so I will start right where this one leaves off next time. It's partially written, I'm just not sure I'm all that happy with it.
Thanks for reading and reviewing. A special thank you to all the kind guest reviewers who I can't thank personally! Love you guys!
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SOOKIE
My alarm wakes me at seven-thirty and I take a quick shower because I have an appointment at eight and I want to go to the store before I have to be at Eric's at nine.
Campus is virtually deserted at this time of the morning during a school break so I have a long lonely freezing walk to the student health center. I dread going to the "lady doctor." It's no fun at all. But the reason I am going, to get on birth control, leads to a whole lot of fun.
Fun like last night. Damn! That man's tongue is heaven. Everything on his body is, really. He is so beautiful and there might be a worry for such an attractive man to be selfish in bed. I mean, I'm sure before he became a single father, he had women throwing themselves at him left and right. Well, actually, I've seen it happen more times than I can recall. He just doesn't have the time to be with all those women now. But he is not selfish. He practically begged me to let him go down on me. I don't even know why I made him ask me three times. Something came over me for sure and I did that extremely uncharacteristic strip tease for him. What can I say? He brings out the wanton hussy in me. But it is oh so fun!
The doctor appointment goes quickly since I booked the first one of the day. My arm hurts a little where I got the birth control shot but not too bad. I head to the store to pick up some condoms because I'm staying the night with Eric and I want to be prepared if he wants to have sex. I have to wait a week for my shot to start protecting me but I'm not sure if Eric will want to leave out the condoms then anyway. I hope he does because I like the spontaneity of condom free sex— even if I don't so much like the clean-up. I stash the condoms in my backpack that also has my clothes and toiletries and head down to the subway train that will take me to Eric's house.
As soon as he sees me he pulls me to his chest and hugs the life out of me. Well, that's what it feels like anyway, but I love to be in his strong arms so I don't mind the squeezing.
"Did ya miss me?" I tease but instead of replying playfully, he goes serious on me. Intense, is the word that this look brings to mind and it makes me want to grab his face and tell him how much I love him. It's getting harder and harder to keep that quiet and I wonder at what point it would be okay for me to tell him. If it's not soon, I may burst— or blurt it out at a less than opportune time.
"I missed you so very much, Sookie," he says with such a tender voice and with such soulful eyes that I feel my heart stutter and my stomach flip as I look up at him. My want to profess my love for him increases tenfold and I literally bite my tongue to keep from spilling my guts, or my heart as it were. Instead, I smile at him and reach up to cup his sweet face. I stand on my tiptoes to kiss his beautiful mouth and whisper that I missed him too.
We stand looking at each other in like a vacuum of time in which only he and I exist. And I stare into his eyes until I feel small hands grip my pant leg and look down to see his bright eyed little one looking up at me with an equally bright smile.
"Oh, Annika! I missed you too sweet girl!" I say, bending down to scoop her up. I pepper her chubby little cheeks with kisses because I know it makes her giggle and I swing her around until I notice Eric looking at me with a funny smile. I don't have much time to think about what it means because there is a knock at the door.
Right. Nine- fifteen, skank number one. That's how I feel even if it's not very nice. I'm trying to be open-minded, I am. Maybe these potential nannies will be alright. Maybe they won't want to throw themselves at Eric or throw him to the ground and jump on him like I did. Maybe they will be nice and caring and not have aspirations to end up in his bed.
As soon as the knock sounds, the change that comes over Eric is absolutely fascinating. His posture changes, his face changes, and the air that surrounds him becomes suddenly magnetized. That's the only way I can describe the absolutely powerful way in which he now commands the room. He becomes someone else entirely and it dawns on me that I am now witnessing Business Eric. He just got ten times more attractive and if he can utterly captivate me like this, I fear what will happen when he opens that door.
My fears, as it turns out, are completely justified by the small, stacked, sexy brunette that stands on the other side of the door. Eric stands with the door open and I can see Yvetta standing there in jeans tighter than bark on a tree and with a megawatt smile brighter than the sun. Any residual hope I have of an easy time interviewing these women, goes right out the window...which is, coincidentally, just where I want to throw her!
"Mr. Northman," she purrs in her thick accent, "So nice to meet you." She does that European kiss thing— both cheeks, and Eric dips his head down to her face because I guess he is also used to this. I'm trying not to freak out but this slutmuffin just put her lips on my man— twice!
Eric turns around as I walk up behind him and is momentarily startled at the anger I'm sure he can see on my face. His eyes widen briefly and then his face flushes. Out of embarrassment, or something else, I'm not sure.
"Yvetta," he says, as he puts his hand on my back and pulls me forward to stand next to him, "This is Sookie. She is helping me with interviews." Her name from his mouth...yuck. I don't want to hear that again. "And this," he says, running his hand over Annika's hair, "Is my daughter Annika."
Yvetta's smile, which had faltered when he put his hand on me, now brightens once more but she completely ignores me and reaches for Annika, who is in my arms.
She takes her –just snatches her right out of my arms and my stomach tightens with my effort to keep my mouth shut. I want to tell this baby snatcher that Annika is mine and that she can back the fuck off, but I say nothing.
To her credit, she is being very good with Annika, talking animatedly with her—in French. Smiling and pointing things out to her as she walks around the room. But she has not noticed, or she just doesn't care, that Annika is not entirely comfortable. Annika keeps looking to me and Eric as if to say who is this woman and why is she holding me?
Yvetta comes back over to Eric, who takes Annika from her, thankfully. She looks up at him and says in her fucking purr, "I can teach your baby French if you like." Yeah? And I can teach you some fucking manners.
Eric says something to her in French—he really wants me to kick his ass, doesn't he? He can just shut his stupid sexy French mouth. This will not earn him brownie points with me. I will not get turned on if the French he speaks is to converse with this hoebag.
Her eyes widen and she says something back to him in French, smiling and touching his arm and I think I must feel how a hitman feels right before he offs his target. Just this eerie sense of calm, like, yup, I'm about to end your life.
Eric sees me coming up to them and no doubt notices my state of mind. His face goes pink again and he quickly backs up from her touch. Honestly, I feel kind of bad for him. He's not really doing anything wrong and he keeps getting flustered by my reactions. But I still want to kill her.
"Shall we sit down and get started," he says, no doubt trying to keep the peace and keep me from breaking this bimbo's neck.
"Yes, let's sit over here," I say between clenched teeth, walking over to the dining table. We had discussed sitting in the living room but I want to put space between this woman and my man. A dining table will do nicely. I pull Eric so he sits with me on one side of the table, leaving Yvetta on the other side. He gives me a brief confused look but sits down anyway. Good boy, he values his life.
I jump in with the questions after she hands Eric her resume. Every time I look at her, she is looking at Eric. Annika is sitting on his lap, but it's not Annika she is looking at. She watches him and every time he even glances at her, she smiles brightly for him and makes some type of movement to draw his eyes to her chest or her hair. I mean, he's hot, I get that. His smile is panty melting but this is a fucking interview! Be a little more professional! Shit.
"So, Yvetta," I say, after we go over her education and experience, "What would you say is the most difficult part of taking care of a baby?"
"Difficult?" she says, as if I asked her if she juggles in the circus, "What could be difficult about taking care of such a beautiful little girl? Except maybe leaving her with her daddy and going home each night." The way she emphasizes the word daddy, has me clenching my jaw again. Yeah, you are not getting this job, hoe cake.
Eric makes a noise in his throat but I can't tell what it means. Surely he notices her excessive doe eyes and flirty movements.
"Yes, well, when she is sick, it is not so easy," he says and I want to throw my arms around him and kiss him.
"Where are you from?" she asks him, sitting suddenly straighter in her chair. Damn it! Now she will like him even more. It's the way he says 'easy' with the s sound, that gives him away if you are listening for it. And she is hanging on his every word so of course she notices.
"Sweden," he says, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. Knowing he will not want to answer any of her personal questions, I steer the conversation back to the topic we are all here for.
"So, Yvetta, Eric needs someone who is very flexible and can handle late hours. He sometimes works very late, how do you feel about that?"
"Oh, he can keep me here as late as he wants," she says suggestively, "I am extremely flexible."
Oh my fucking god, I'm going to murder this bitch! Her words cause Eric to choke on the water he is drinking and she is pleased as punch by his reaction. I shoot him a glare and he gives me a brief apologetic look. This is not going well.
There are only a few more questions I have for Yvetta so I ask them and she answers while looking at Eric, of course. That is, until he gets up to make Annika a bottle. But her eyes follow him even then and when they fixate on his butt, my hands clench and I wish her neck was between them. Truthfully, her answers are not bad but she is way too flirty for me to be comfortable with her in his house all day. Of course I know it's not ultimately my decision but I hope Eric will take my opinion into account.
As soon as I usher her out of the house, I go to sit next to Eric on the couch where he is feeding Annika a bottle.
"What did you think?" I ask as I flop down next to them.
"She was nice," he says with a shrug.
"She was nice?" I say with a much more shrill voice than I mean to.
He looks over at me, visibly startled by my reaction. "She wasn't nice?" he says, shaking his head slowly.
"She was a whore!"
"Oh, come on," he says, "She was friendly."
"Friendly? Oh, Eric, I am extremely flexible!" I say, mimicking both what she said and the accent she said it with.
Eric's face turns red. "Ok, maybe that was a bit suggestive," he mumbles.
"A bit? Eric if you weren't holding Annika I think she would have pulled your chair out and straddled your lap!"
"You do?" he says, sounding much less disgusted than I think he should.
I stand up so fast that Annika flinches, which makes me instantly calm down. I sigh and sit back down. "Eric, she's out, okay? She wants to mount you, not take care of your baby," I say quietly.
"Okay," he says hesitantly, like he doesn't believe me.
"Do you like women throwing themselves at you?" I ask, because I am frankly a little annoyed by his attitude.
"Of course not! I just thought she was very friendly."
"Well, think harder, Eric. If you don't nip this stuff in the bud it just gets out of hand. You have to be aware of how you're coming across especially if someone likes you, so you don't lead anybody on."
Something comes over Eric. His face goes hard and dark, and he stands and hands me Annika.
"Can you take her?" he asks with a subdued voice. As soon as I do, he walks upstairs without another word.
What the hell? Why did he get so sullen all of a sudden? When Annika is done with her bottle, he still has not come down so we go looking for him.
The door to his room is closed so I knock.
"Yeah?" he says.
"Can we come in, Eric?"
"Yeah," he says again, sounding like he wishes he could just tell me to go away.
I walk in to find him sitting on the edge of his bed with his elbows on his knees and his head hanging down. He's upset.
"What's wrong, Eric?" I ask as I set Annika on the floor and sit next to him on the bed. I put my hand in the middle of his back and he stiffens and sits up straight, effectively ceasing our contact.
"Are you mad at me?" I ask. I don't know what I did but he's being really weird right now.
"You think it's my fault?" he says with so much anger in his voice that I am shocked. I don't even know what he's talking about.
"What's your fault? I'm not following you, Eric. Calm down."
"No! Don't tell me to fucking calm down! I didn't do a single thing to make her come after me like she does. Not a single thing! I should be able to be friendly to women without them thinking I want to fuck them!" His voice is rough and gritty with a desperate edge, though he is careful not to be loud.
Oh, the bitch he works with. Shit. That's not what I meant by what I said but I can see how he would take it like that.
"Eric, that's really not what I meant. Of course it's not your fault that she won't take your no seriously. That is totally and completely on her. It has nothing to do with anything you've ever done. I don't think it's your fault, honey. I'm sorry if it sounded like I did."
He looks at me for a long moment and then nods and picks up Annika who pulled herself up next to him as soon as he started speaking so angrily. He sits her on his lap and lowers his face to kiss her hair. "I'm sorry, baby," he whispers to her. I know he hates when he loses his temper even a little bit.
I walk around in front of him and reach slowly for him to see if he will let me touch him now. He doesn't resist so I put my hand on the back of his neck and lower my face to kiss his hair. He looks up at me smiling because I copied his actions so I take the opportunity to kiss his sweet mouth. Of course Annika wants some attention too so she squeals and kicks her feet, thus ending our moment. It's fine though, because the other nanny should be here any minute.
"Are you okay?" I ask Eric, "I'm really sorry." I stand up and offer him my hand to help him up.
"Yeah," he says sheepishly. "I should have stayed and talked instead of running upstairs. I'm trying Sookie, I hope you know that. I'm sorry."
"I do know," I say, "Don't feel bad." He looks like a child right now, all big eyes and open features, and for the four hundredth time I feel the urge to tell him how I feel about him, but I don't. Not yet.
He puts his arm around me and I melt briefly into his side. His arms always make me feel so good.
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ERIC
I feel better now that Sookie explained that she wasn't saying that Victoria Madden's advances are somehow my fault. I don't think I flirt at work but I can't help being friendly. If someone wants to take that wrong, that's not my fault.
Sookie and I walk side by side downstairs because the next nanny will be here soon. I hope this interview goes better than the last one. The last girl did not seem very in tune with my baby. She didn't seem to notice that Anni was scared when she grabbed her away from Sookie. Sookie didn't like it either, or her.
If looks could kill, Yvetta would have been dead three or four times over, though I don't think she did anything that bad. When Yvetta answered Sookie's question about what she finds difficult, I swear Sookie even growled at her and I had to cover my surprised noise by clearing my throat awkwardly. Sookie just seemed really mad at me and Yvetta for everything that happened. I was trying to be professional but I just kept messing up, based on Sookie's anger. I hate it when she's mad at me. It makes me feel like shit. But I really wasn't sure what to do because I didn't want to be rude. I have no control over other people's actions. Although I can't say I wasn't flattered by Sookie's jealousy.
The next nanny knocks on the door almost as soon as we make it downstairs and as I go to answer it, I decide that I will make sure I don't throw out mixed signals. I introduce myself and my daughter and then pull Sookie to my side by her hand.
"And this is my girlfriend, Sookie," I say, smiling at her. She looks briefly startled and then gives me one of the biggest smiles that has ever crossed her face. I think her cheeks are going cramp from it! My smile automatically gets bigger because of the sheer joy of hers.
She puts her arm around my waist and it's not until the nanny says, "Nice to meet you both," that I even remember she is there. I pull my eyes reluctantly from Sookie's face and shake the nanny's outstretched hand, which she then offers to Sookie. Hand shakes are better than cheek kisses— check.
So far, so good. I ask her into the living room, which is where we agreed to meet the candidates. I think Sookie just took Yvetta to the dining table because she was touching me too much. Some people just touch other people, though. And she touched my arm so I don't think it was as big of a deal as Sookie thinks. Anyway, I'm not about to make her more angry with me by letting this girl, Janna, touch me at all. Well, besides the handshake.
As Janna breezes past me into the living room, I get a small whiff of cigarette smoke. I know I specifically indicated I wanted non-smokers only on my client profile so unless she was just in a smoky cab, she is out right now as far as I'm concerned. Not that I have anything against smokers, I just don't want one watching my baby all day. She wouldn't be able to smoke around Annika, and that means she will either be wanting a cigarette all day or leaving the baby alone to have one. Not going to fucking happen.
But cigarettes appear to be the least of our worries, is what I realize as we begin to converse with Janna. She is, quite obviously, strung out and I am immediately on edge. Sookie seems to have noticed too and we share a look that says no fucking way! So now I have to get her out of my house as quickly as possible because the longer I look at her dilated pupils and strange hyper movements, the more I am reminded of my brother and that's not something I want to think about.
Sookie, who is always so in tune with how I'm feeling, seems to share my desire for Janna's expedient exit and she rushes through an abbreviated set of questions. Janna's answers are fine, and if she wasn't so apparently high, she might be a good nanny. But really, coming to an interview all coked out doesn't not a good impression make.
Finally we are done with her and after I walk her to the door, I turn to Sookie with a sigh.
"Two more left. How are we going to get through those? That was ridiculous! She was so high!"
Sookie laughs a little but then immediately sobers up because it's not actually that funny. "No kidding. A slut and a druggie. That's some great luck you got, Northman!"
"I got you didn't I?" I say smiling as I stalk towards her. "I'd say that I'm pretty damn lucky!"
Sookie looks at me and I am momentarily breathless at the intensity in her eyes. And she says I'm the intense one. But her look is simultaneously heated and... something else —tender? More than that but I don't have a chance to analyze it because the kiss that she plants on me is equally intense and it leaves me more than just breathless.
"Sookie, don't wake the beast if you don't want to get mauled," I say huskily.
"Is that what you call that thing?" she says, pushing her body against mine and her lips to my mouth.
She's about to get pushed against the wall if she's not careful. The only thing that stops me is that I glance at Annika who is walking along the couch and every so often laying her head down on it. She's tired and needs her nap.
"Annika," I whisper before Sookie can kiss me again.
She immediately backs up. "Oh! I'm so sorry," she says.
"It's totally fine, Sookie. More than fine. But she needs a nap," I say, gesturing to Annika, whose eyes are half closed where her head is resting on the couch.
"Let me put her down to sleep, Eric, I haven't had her in my arms enough today."
"No, it's your day off. Besides, I miss her. I missed bedtime yesterday."
"Ok," she says as she kisses me softly.
I go upstairs and change Annika and then sit down to rock her to sleep. "Sookie loves you, lucky girl," I murmur to her, feeling a little bit jealous. Do I want her to love me too? I think it would be okay if she did. But my racing heart betrays my desire and I realize that I do indeed want to be loved by Sookie. Babies are much easier to love though, and I know I'm not. Babies don't yell at you or run away like a child to avoid talking, babies don't freak out when tough emotions are involved—they don't have so many unloveable parts. No, babies are lovable. But still, maybe someday she will love me too. Maybe someday I'll deserve it.
I look down to see that Annika is asleep so I gently put her in her crib and go downstairs to Sookie to hopefully finish what we started.
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As I said, there is much more of their day(and night) to come but I'm still working on it so I hope this is good for now and I hope to have something else out soon. Hopefully my husband will feel better soon because as much as I want to be, I am not as patient as Sookie!
Thank you for reading! A review would make my day!