So sorry again for the wait, but not sure how often I can update with everything going on at uni. I haven't had as much time I would have liked to finish the chapter, so I don't even know what it's like, but here we are.

I know people are worried that after everything she has been through Regina deserves a break, and it will come I promise but there is going to be some angst in the next few chapters. But trust me when I say things have to get worse before they get better, and it will (eventually lol).

Thank you so much for all of your support, and I really appreciate every review. I will try and update as soon as I can but it may be two weeks or so.

After going back to his room at the bed and breakfast to change and freshen up, Robin made his way down Main Street to Mr. Gold's shop. The bell on the door announced his entrance, and as the outlaw made his way further into the room he saw the sorcerer at the counter organising a rack of vials.

'I was just on my way out,' he said without lifting his gaze from his work.

'I know,' said Robin, 'but there is something I need to discuss with you before you see Regina.'

Rumplestiltskin looked at him and raised an eyebrow. 'Does she know that you are here?'

'She does, yes. We both hope that you might be able to help her.'

'Isn't that what I am already doing?' Gold answered smartly. He was intrigued by Robin's visit, even if he had predicted it was coming. He could feel that something was off, and he needed to know what it was.

'You and I both know she still isn't doing well.'

Gold lowered his head, pushing the vials to one side and folding his hands on the counter.

'Yes,' he said sombrely. 'I thought that she might open up to you, and it seems I was right.'

He knew that he could tell Robin that he had already enough, brush him off like an insect, but something stopped him. Gold had wanted to aid his former protégée when he had orchestrated for Robin to go to her, and perhaps he had the information Regina had refused to give him herself.

'What is it that you think I might be able to help with?'

'Dreams,' Robin answered simply. Gold looked at him, confused.

'Dreams?'

'Yes,' the outlaw acknowledged, wondering how to start the explanation. 'She won't sleep at all because of them, and when she does she wakes up crying and screaming; it's awful. Even when she's awake I think that what she sees when she closes her eyes haunts her.'

'Well I'm sure I can do something about that,' Gold smirked, trying to hide the sense of relief flooding through him. 'I had suspected that something was wrong, but she wouldn't tell me about it. However it does seem odd…'

'Odd?' Robin asked.

'She has come to me before now to help her with dreams,' Gold explained, recalling the dream catcher he had given her. 'I don't understand why now it would be any different.'

As he thought about it, Gold's face began to fall and his usual calm composure vanished in an instant. He looked up at Robin, whose own heart was racing at the obvious change in the older man's expression.

'What, what is it?' asked the outlaw.

'Tell me about the dreams.'

Robin stumbled over his words, confused. 'They're about what happened…well, more about what might have happened…but she only told me about one, I don't know if they're all the same-'

'Tell me very specifically about that dream, in as much detail as you can,' Rumplestiltskin demanded, a hint of urgency making itself apparent as he cut off Robin's ramblings.

'Regina said it was like a window into what could have been,' he began to explain. 'She saw her life, our life together, as it could have been if she hadn't lost the baby.'

Robin cleared his throat, trying not to dwell on the images which made his heart thump loudly in his chest. 'The one she had last night, while I was there, was about her bringing home the baby after she had been born. She said it was so real that she could hardly tell the difference between that and reality, and when she was dreaming it was as though nothing had happened. I'm not surprised that she doesn't want to sleep. It must be torture for her to see those sorts of things.'

Gold closed his eyes and exhaled loudly, his fears confirmed in Robin's words. The relief vanished as quickly as it had come.

'What?'

'It is the price,' he answered with a sigh, shaking his head as he reluctantly opened his eyes.

'What price?' asked Robin, feeling his chest tighten in anticipation.

'The price of what was done to restore her,' Rumple explained. 'You know the saying as well as anyone. I warned you when I boosted her magic to bring her back that I could not foresee the consequences. It was complex magic, cheating death in a way-'

'So this is her punishment?' Robin shook his head, anger bubbling just below the surface at the injustice of it all. He started to pace, trying to keep himself calm. 'Because she didn't die, she has to suffer these awful dreams?'

Gold's heart sank; he didn't want to tell him. He had survived for so long without allowing himself to become emotionally involved in other people's affairs, but since his marriage to Belle that was no longer an option. He could see that Robin felt the same way about Regina as he did about his wife, as he chewed on his thumbnail pacing the floor. His worry resonated from him like an aura, and Rumple didn't want to add to his troubles. It was far more difficult to care than to remain impassive.

'They're not dreams,' Gold sighed. Robin stopped in his tracks and looked up, his eyes widening.

'What do you mean?'

'They're visions of sort,' he explained. 'When the child was lost, the life Regina would have had was also gone forever. But if things had worked out differently, she would have lived that life and that is what she is seeing; an alternative reality.'

Robin couldn't speak for a moment, trying to process what he was being told.

'So…when she says that she sees what our lives could have been like…'

'She's right,' Gold admitted heavily. 'It's not just an imagining of what could have happened. She sees events exactly as they would have occurred had she not lost the child. For all intents and purposes they could have been real, which is why they feel as such to her.'

Robin tangled his fingers in his hair, his anger dissipating and turning instead into horror. He swallowed, his eyes meeting Gold's.

'Tell me there is something you can do,' he breathed.

'I'm sorry.'

Robin's eyes closed, his heart plummeting within his chest. He felt sick, his stomach twisting in knots.

'This isn't as simple as banishing bad dreams,' Rumple confessed. 'It would be too risky to try anything if this is the price for keeping her alive, but even then I wouldn't know where to begin. This is more complicated magic than I have ever encountered. I wish I had better news. Regina doesn't deserve this.'

'No,' Robin muttered, slowly opening his eyes and feeling as if the room had darkened around him. He thought for a moment, trying to gather the wasp's nest of thoughts buzzing around in his head. He had let her down again. When he had left Regina that morning he had promised her that he would try to bring her answers, an end to what was holding her back from beginning the long healing process. Instead he would have to tell her not only that there was nothing that could be done, but that her nightmares were more than just ideas within her mind. Unless…

'You can't tell her,' Robin said slowly, lowering his hands from his head.

'What do you mean?'

'Everything you've told me,' he explained, 'you can't tell Regina. This…she's already fragile, I fear that this might break her.'

Gold nodded slowly, but he didn't seem convinced.

'But you told her that you would come to me?'

'I did,' Robin admitted.

'Then won't she expect some sort of response from me?' Gold pointed out. 'I can hardly ignore the subject if she knows that you have come here.'

Robin pondered it for a moment. 'You can say that you haven't found anything, but that you're still looking into it.'

Gold raised an eyebrow. 'You want me to lie?'

Robin swallowed thickly. He hated the thought of lying to the woman he loved, especially after she had forgiven him for everything he had done to her, but in his heart he knew that he was acting in her best interests. Taking a deep breath he nodded.

'If she thinks that there is no hope, then it will just push her further back into the dark place she is trying to come out of. And it's not entirely untruthful; I am going to search for any way I can to help her, I'm not giving up. I'm only doing this to protect her, surely you can see that?'

Gold didn't question it for a second, the genuine emotion in Robin's eyes plain enough to see.

'I think perhaps you might be right,' he conceded. 'I will be as discrete as I can, but you and I both know how intelligent she is. You can't pull the wool over her eyes for long.'

'Hopefully I won't have to,' Robin muttered.

Xxx

By the time Archie finally left, Regina felt exhausted. In a way it had been a relief to get some of the things off her chest that had been weighing her down, but at the same time it brought up some of the darker things she would rather have stayed hidden in a fog of denial.

She went to pour herself a glass of water before stopping herself. Flexing her fingers, she held out one hand and willed her magic to her fingertips. At first it was reluctant, lingering just beyond her reach. But as she thought back on what she and the cricket had discussed, allowing emotion to fill her chest and make her eyes burn with tears she refused to shed, the jug of water lifted from the table and water streamed slowly into the glass on her side table until it was filled.

'Well well dearie,' a familiar voice called, 'someone has their magic back.'

Regina returned the jug to its original position, exhaling deeply as the weight of the exertion washed over her, before turning to look up at Gold who was closing the curtain that surrounded her bed behind him.

'Not entirely,' she told him, 'but I can access it in some form at least.'

'It'll come,' he encouraged her with a gentle smile that almost convinced her that he cared. 'Does it tire you?'

'Yes,' Regina admitted, taking a sip from the glass.

Gold moved closer, until he was almost standing over her. 'Your body has been through an awful lot, damaged physically and by magic. Once it has time to heal, you will be able to use it with ease.'

Nodding, Regina set the glass down. 'Do you think that having my magic back will mean I can sustain my own recovery?'

'Trying to get rid of me?' Gold smirked, and he was glad to see the corners of Regina's mouth twitching too. 'Soon, yes, but if pouring water exhausts you then you won't get far in trying to heal yourself. For now it will certainly help in making you feel stronger faster.'

'Good,' said Regina, 'I feel like hell.'

'You look it,' Gold quipped, but he felt a little sadness that there was truth in his words. Even after a week, she looked as if one touch could break her. Her wrists were so thin that they looked as if they might snap like twigs, and the darkness she hadn't yet managed to shake was still present in her eyes. Robin had been right, Gold thought. She couldn't know the truth.

'Shall we get on?'

'I suppose,' Regina sighed, adjusting herself in the chair so that she was comfortable. Her teeth caught the corner of her lip as she pondered whether to ask. 'Did Robin come and see you?'

Gold hesitated, but kept his composure. 'He did.'

'And he told you…'

'About your dreams, yes.'

Regina searched his expression, trying to gauge any sort of reaction and finding nothing. She couldn't tell if that was a good or bad sign.

'And?'

'I am looking into it,' he answered calmly, 'but I have no news to bring you on the subject as of yet.'

Regina's eyes narrowed.

'You're lying,' she said with certainty. His expression was a picture of calm, and yet somehow he just knew. She could feel it resonating from him like an energy, and as soon as the words left her lips she knew them to be true.

'Lying? Why would I lie?'

'I don't know,' she admitted, 'but you are. Tell me the truth, Rumple. For old time's sake.'

'I don't know what you-'

'Please,' Regina pleaded softly. 'If Robin has told you not to, then I understand that. But you have no loyalty to him.'

'You think I have loyalty to you?' scoffed Gold, trying to keep up his mask of indifference and knowing that she could already see past it

Regina nodded. 'I think we know each other well enough by now to hold at least some sense of respect for one another.'

Gold exhaled deeply, shaking his head.

'I'm not trying to hurt you,' he explained gently. 'If anything it is because I do have some sense of loyalty that I promised Robin I wouldn't tell you.'

Regina's heart hammered inside her chest, fear threatening to strangle her with its vice-like grip. She swallowed, trying to keep her feelings from being mirrored in her expression.

'I won't beg,' she breathed, 'but I will ask. I am not a child. I have spent my entire life being manipulated; by my mother, by you… Just tell me the truth. I won't blame you, and I don't blame Robin for trying to protect me.'

'The moment I tell you, you will wish I hadn't,' Gold warned her.

Regina lifted her head regally, looking at him as she had done all those years ago in the Enchanted Forest.

'That's my burden to bear.'

Gold took a seat beside her.

'I'm sorry, dearie,' he mumbled, before telling her the truth she didn't want to hear.

Xxx

'Regina?'

She couldn't breathe, let alone find the words to respond. It felt as if the air had been pulled from her lungs.

'Regina?'

'Go,' she whispered, staring off into space unable to meet Gold's gaze.

'I warned you-'

'Go,' Regina repeated, a single tear spilling down her cheek.

'We haven't finished,' he reminded her, regretting that he had ever let her words persuade him to betray his promise to Robin.

'Later,' she managed to say, her hands trembling as she folded them in her lap, 'I need to be alone for a while.'

Gold nodded, standing and starting to walk away. He stopped just before the curtain, looking back over his shoulder.

'I'll try to find something,' he swore.

'All magic comes with a price,' she said darkly. 'The first thing you taught me.'

'Not this,' Gold sighed. 'I won't stand for it.'

Regina said nothing in reply, defeated. She waited until Gold was gone to let out the breath she realised she had been holding in and closed her eyes. Another blow. In reality, it made very little difference. Knowing what she saw when she closed her eyes wouldn't make it go away but it didn't make it worse, not really. Then why did she feel as if she'd been kicked in the gut?

She groaned aloud when Doctor Whale came in, her head falling into her hands.

'Not now, Victor,' she mumbled.

'I'm sorry, Regina, but we have to talk.'

'I'm tired,' she breathed. 'I think I've had quite enough visitors for one morning.'

'I wish it could wait,' the doctor sighed.

Regina looked up at him, and noticed the sombre expression on his face. Her heart began to race. She felt weaker than she ever had in that moment, knowing that whatever the doctor was about to say it would be a step too far. She wondered if the cracks in her armour could be seen as clearly as if they marred her skin.

Doctor Whale sat beside her, where Gold had been sitting a moment earlier, and she felt as if she had been paralysed. Somehow, Regina knew that what he was about to say was going to break her. She wasn't wrong.

Xxx

Robin walked in through the hospital doors with one hand interlocked with Roland's, and the other holding a miniature chess board; he hoped she wouldn't beat him too harshly in front of his son. The young boy was rambling on about everything he was going to tell Regina when he saw her; he hadn't stopped since Robin had picked him up half an hour go.

'Do you think she'll like the flowers Daddy?' he asked, looking up at his father.

'She'll love them,' Robin assured her with a smile, his eyes flicking to the bouquet Roland was holding. Marian said that he had spent all morning picking through the fields for the best blooms, and the arrangement he had put together was an array of every colour imaginable all tied with a piece of red string.

'I'm going to give her a big hug when I see her.'

'Remember to be careful,' Robin warned him gently as they turned the corner to bring them to Regina's room.

'I will,' Roland said seriously. 'Is Gina going to be okay? Will she be able to come out soon?'

Robin smiled comfortingly. 'I hope so.'

A nurse ran past them, nearly knocking Robin over in the process. She was running from Regina's room. A knot formed in Robin's stomach; he knew that something was wrong. He could feel it in his gut.

'Daddy?'

Robin picked Roland up and walked faster towards Regina's bed, pulling back the curtain. Everything happened at once.

Doctor Whale was on the floor, a hand reaching to the bloodied spot where he had hit his head. The chair had been overturned, water spilled on the floor and the screens of the monitors were cracked and broken. People were shouting, running, trying to make sense of the situation but Robin didn't realise what was happening until his son looked at him and said;

'Daddy…where's Gina?'

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