**The outfit Lacey wore to school wasn't showing so if you type polyvore .com/ into your browser and add cgi/set?id=30988940 you should be able to see it.**
Okay so for some god forsaken reason I can't get my crap together a prioritize to get updates out for this story in time so yeah I suck, love me ahaha. Thank you so so so much for all the positive reviews, I love all of you that read and review. This is gonna be fun chapter, I hope you like it! Hehehehohohoho. Ughklsafjiowe okay sorry I'm actually rambling right now. Have fun, enjoy, review! (:
Chapter 20: Unrequited Love
I walked with Jacob to his first class of the day, which was some kind of gym class and he ended up showing up for a few minutes only to ask for a pass to leave, fully intending on not coming back.
"I can't believe you just did that!" I shook my head in disbelief.
"It's gym, don't act like you've never done anything bad in your life." He rolled his eyes.
"I'll have you know, I'm the perfect example of a lady." I curtsied just to prove my point.
"That the girl you were talking to earlier?" Jacob awkwardly cleared his throat and nodded in Madeleine's direction.
"Yeah. Come on." I motioned for him to follow.
Madeleine was sitting in the commons area, other students littered the area spread about, listening to music and laughing. They fell quiet, however, when Jacob and I walked in. I willed myself to ignore them, containing the urge to smack them all in the face and remind them to close their mouths' before the flies come in. And trust me, that urge was strong.
"Hey." Madeleine took out her earbud's and cleared the table she was sitting at of textbooks and various papers.
"Chello." I wiggled my eyebrows at her.
Jacob awkwardly raised two fingers, acknowledging her.
"I'll just let you guys talk and what not. Lacey, you know where to find Paul for second period right?" He directed his attention at me.
I nodded and he walked away, joining Quil and Embry who were also skipping. As soon as he was far away enough Madeleine pounced.
"Explain. What do you mean you live with him?" She hissed and I had to contain my laughter.
"Okay, well my dad and his dad were really, really close before we moved to New York." I began.
"You used to live here? And you actually came back?" Madeleine wrinkled her nose in disgust.
"Will you let me finish?" I rolled my eyes but she apologized and motioned for me to continue.
"Anyways when my dad passed away, my mom re-married this jerk named James and I moved in with Billy because I couldn't stand it anymore." I tweaked the story a little.
"Oh. So you actually…live with him?" She asked.
"Yes." I sighed exasperated.
"And you don't find yourself wanting to…I don't know, hightail it back to New York?" Madeleine laughed a brow in disbelief.
"I'm never going back." I said too quickly and she raised a brow.
"I mean…it's not so bad. Jacob's actually really nice and so are the rest of the guys." I smoothed over.
"When they're not on a roid rage." She snorted.
"No really." I laughed.
"It still bites that they get special privileges." Madeleine griped to me again.
"They do a lot more for the tribe than you think." I shrugged.
"Anywhoo. How long have you been staying with them?" She asked.
"A month before the beginning of the school year. I used to go to Forks High School." I replied.
"Why are you switching?"
"We were all skipping a ton and hanging out so Billy and the council decided it'd be best if I just switch over that way we'd have no excuse." I explained.
"Ahh. So you are…tight with them?" She offered and I nodded.
"So where does Genevieve come in?" Maddie asked.
"Well remember I embarrassed her this morning with the whole thong issue? Jacob had been outside waiting for me and I guess they just went to homeroom when he realized I was late. We got to talking and when I said goodbye to you and walked into homeroom I saw all of them sitting together and nobody anywhere near them. Nobody that is, except Genevieve and so I told her to move so I could sit next to Jacob. She told me to make her and then Jacob told her to get up and sit somewhere else before she embarrassed herself." I explained all the while Madeleine's face went from slightly entertained to gravely concerned.
"I'm so screwed aren't I?" I groaned and not-so-lightly banged my head against the table.
"Don't worry hun, it's only for the rest of high school." Maddie patted my back comfortingly.
"I'm not going to deal with her menial bullshit. As if I haven't got enough on my back as it is." I mumbled.
Madeleine changed the topic, sensing my frustration, and the conversation flowed easily. We talked about her childhood, her interests, her passions and dreams for the future. I answered and mhmm'ed at all the proper places, careful to say anything about my childhood, my interests, passions and dreams for the future and not just because 3 out of the 4 now involved Jacob.
"I was born and raised in a house near the border of Forks and La Push. Even though my parents were both Quileute I went to school in Forks with the pale faces until my freshmen year of high school but I never really fit in. I was awkward and the kids treated me like some kind of science experiment, they weren't used to native kids going to school with them so I had all of three friends. It didn't help that I was completely obsessed with painting and photography. After a while my parents gave in to my endless pleading and enrolled me here. It's kind of easier now and I even sell a few pictures and paintings online for extra cash. But all the things I paint or photograph is the endlessly green landscape of La Push. I'd like to travel the world taking pictures and painting people in exchange for a night in their home. I don't know, it seems stupid but I wanna get out of this stupid town. There's nothing here."
It struck a chord with me when she said that. Embry had once upon time confided in me that the reason why he hated the Cullen's so much was that because of them he was bound to this land, this tribe who would always despise the strain he caused the day he phased. When they realized that his mother had done the unthinkable and his father could be anyone. He had always wanted to leave but he had no choice. I wanted to cry or laugh or do both. Madeleine despised them for getting special treatment but she had the one thing Embry would give anything up for in a heartbeat. Freedom.
Soon enough the bell rang and we parted ways. I wandered through the halls and eventually bumped into a very angry Paul.
"What's wrong?" I bumped my hips against his.
"People can't shut the fuck up about you." Paul growled.
"I don't care. So you shouldn't either." I stated simply.
"It's still fucking disgusting." He spit on the ground for emphasis.
A girl wrinkled her nose and walked around it and I apologized.
"So what class am I going to now?" I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.
"Beats me. Physics or some other." He grinned.
We ended up taking a detour for a quick snack and having to run to make it to class on time. It was a pretty uneventful period and Paul fell asleep within the first few minutes while the teacher drolled on. I doodled on a piece of paper until the bell rang feeling utterly restless. Thankfully the boys had a free period next which meant we could sit through all lunches. I was still wondering what the deal with Genevieve was. I mean sure I had embarrassed her but it wasn't in front of a ton of people. And the scene in homeroom this morning was her fault, not mine. It occurred to me then that she could simply be jealous of how close I was with the pack.
I walked into the bathroom and was glad to find it empty. It occurred to me then that she could simply be jealous of how close I was with the pack. I had noticed that nobody approached them, talked to them or befriended them. Nobody except Genevieve. But I didn't see what there was to be jealous about. Genevieve was one of those girls. Every high school had them. She was half French and half Quileute, her skin was almost as pale as Bella's and her cheeks were always the perfect shade of rose. Her peroxide filled hair was the color of the sun and fell to her shoulders in soft, shiny curls. Her eyes were a clear green and her lashes were long, her lips the same rose color as her cheeks. She wore short skirts, despite the weather and her stick thin legs went for miles. Her handbags designer, her heels impossibly high and absolutely every one of her friends and most of the school was a not-as-good carbon copy of her. As stereotypical and insecure as it sounds, I couldn't help but compare myself to her. I had muddy hazel eyes that were not quite brown and not quite green. My hair couldn't hold a curl and only stayed straight with pounds of product. My knees, legs and arms were scarred from a rough childhood. My teeth weren't nearly as white, I laughed too loud and reveled in the night.
I was nothing compared to her. And with that thought I sighed and exited the stall. I washed my hands slowly, the venn diagram I had drawn in mind had left me a little depressed. I was never the type to be insecure about appearances but everything had changed because of that witch. And who should walk in then, in the middle of my self-pity and moping, but Genevieve flanked by her two groupies?
Her laughter (yet another thing about her that was perfect) stopped short when her emerald eyes fell on my face. They hardened and the smile stretched into a sadistic one.
"Well, well, well. Look who it is." She took slow steps towards me.
I aimed for a look of nonchalance as I wiped my hands with a paper towel and headed towards the exit. Maybe she'll drop this, maybe she'll leave me alone, maybe I won't die in a bathroom, I thought optimistically. But as her groupies bee-lined it for the door I realized that no such thing would be happening. At least not today. So I swiveled on my heel and faced Genevieve.
"What do you want?" My voice cracked.
"You've embarrassed me two times too many and on your first day here managed to claw your way up my shit list. And I don't even know your name." She clapped slowly.
"Brava." Genevieve's hand came out for a hand shake.
I took it and bit back a wince, her firm grip was a little too firm.
"I'm Genevieve, if you already haven't heard."
"I'm Lacey, if you already haven't heard." I shot back.
"Listen here Lacey, I don't know what you've got going on with Jacob or any of the other boys but I'm telling you now. Back off. Or you're gonna get hurt." Genevieve's smile gradually turned into a frown as she went right to business.
"Who's gonna hurt me? You?" I snorted.
"See what Jake and I have is something special. You're just some stupid charity case the Blacks took in. The little mutt from New York." She laid on a thick Bronx accent and watched closely for my reaction.
I tried to hide the surprise but it was evident in my blush. How did she know? If she knew this, then what else did she know about me? I was suddenly feeling very intimidated.
"That's right. Be scared. My dad is on the tribal council, I know all about your step-daddy back home. Poor little Lacey, gets beat by Jim-something or other. So she runs and leaves her mommy back home with him, only to live with the Blacks. And what did you think you could do? Start a new life here? Leave behind your troubles? Maybe start a relationship with Jacob?" Genevieve said in a mocking, childish tone.
"You know nothing about me." I hissed.
"I know a lot about you, way too much in fact. Lacey this, Lacey that. You've got the entire council in an uproar about what they're gonna do with you. Like you're important. Let me tell you something, you're nothing. You're like the dust beneath all our feet, not even worthy enough to wipe off. You think Jacob would ever see anything in you at all? You're not good enough for him. Don't ever make the mistake in thinking you are." She stated slowly.
"Oh and let me guess, you are?" I managed to say in a steady voice.
"I'm only trying to help you accept reality Lacey. Jake and I are perfect for each other. We used to go out in fact." Genevieve took on a gentle, sincere tone then and fished a picture out of her bag.
I looked at a smiling Jacob and Genevieve, both of them had much longer hair back then but there was no denying it was them. Jacob had an arm casually slung around her shoulders and the other hand was holding the camera. Genevieve had both her arms wrapped around his chest and her face was buried into his neck, blushing slightly.
"I didn't know." I mumbled quietly.
"Exactly. So in about 10 minutes, when the bell for lunch rings, don't sit next Jacob, don't talk to him, talk to the others instead. But Jake is…" She prompted me.
"Yours." I finished lamely.
"Or else I'll slip your little secret about why you're really here in La Push." Genevieve smiled again and stomped out of the bathroom, satisfied.
I leaned my back against the wall of the bathroom and slid down, utterly defeated. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't help but cry out of frustration. Everything had gone from bad to worse. If I stood up to her she would tell everyone about James. If I didn't she'd get back together with Jake. Either way I lost. But at least with the latter option I'd have a little dignity. Besides, it's not like I wasn't used to Jacob being with other girls. There was Bella. And after all, I was just his friend. Nothing more and nothing less.
So I slowly stood up, attempted to wipe the tears off my face and fix the mess I had made of my makeup. And I got used to the idea that happy endings weren't for me and I'd have to get used to settling.
The bell rang just as I exited the bathroom and I kept my head low, as I hurried towards the lunchroom to catch up with the pack. My eyes were not as red but the puffy face was a tell-tale sign that I had been crying. I crossed my fingers, hoping that the age-old excuse of "I'm tired" would satisfy them.
I spotted Quil and Embry and sat next to them, making distracted small talk. They asked what was wrong and I simply said, jet lag. They accepted it and continued their animated conversation. I laid my head on the table and waited for Paul to arrive so I could apologize. I must have not even noticed his arrival because I raised my head to the sound of his voice, Jake's and Genevieve's. I flinched when I realized Jacob was next to me.
"Hey where were you?" Paul inquired.
"Oh sorry. I went to the bathroom. Got caught up." My eyes instinctively flickered towards Genevieve's.
"Are you okay?" Jacob put a giant, warm hand on the small of my back and I ignored the shivers that made my toes curl.
I nodded, scared to talk in case my voice gave something away. His hand went up and pushed back the curtain of hair that had been hiding my puffy face.
"Have you been crying?" His voice was low.
"No." I slowly moved his hand down and forced a smile on my face, but a look of panic went across my face when Genevieve's mouth opened. She was going to tell. I was sure of it.
I tried to smooth it over but Jacob caught it.
"What did she do?" Jake asked me.
"N-nothing." I stuttered and turned my head away.
"I'm not gonna ask again, what did she do?" He forced me to face him.
When it became evident that I wasn't going say a word to him he turned to Genevieve.
"What did you say to her?" He growled.
Paul was there to restrain him in a flash and the entire lunchroom quieted.
"Calm down." Paul warned.
"No. What did you do?" Jacob's voice rose steadily and his breathing was heavy.
"It's okay." I placed a hand on his large bicep.
"No it's not." He replied flatly.
"I just told her how it should be, how it is. She isn't good enough for you." Genevieve started with a smile.
"Gene, stop right there." Jake's voice was dangerously low.
Genevieve's smile cracked as the entire lunch room held their breath, her face was becoming redder by the nanosecond and she finally burst out.
"She doesn't deserve you. I know it and so do you. She comes from some trashy family in New York and her stupid step-dad beats her, she deserted her own mother, left her with that monster and instead of feeling homesick she tries to cuddle up to? And you're buying this shit? You've given her more conversation, attention and time in two periods than you've given me since we broke up. How the hell am I supposed to compete? What do I do, get an alcoholic step-dad who beats me and get everyone to feel sorry for me? I guess that's what you're into these days. " She blurted this out quickly, forgetting to take breaths in between her sentences and heaving for air afterwards.
"Shut up! Not another word. Whatever delusional fantasy you have about us getting back together, wake up from it. Now. Just because I rejected you, doesn't mean you can terrorize people. Especially Lacey. You don't decide what someone is worth, Lacey's pinky alone means more to me than your entire being. You know nothing about where she comes from, her life or her circumstances. I'm only gonna say this once, leave her alone or you're gonna regret it." Jacob's words were lethal by then, the danger of phasing had passed and now only his speech remained.
It hung in the air for a bit and the lunchroom was alive with tension. Genevieve's usually cool, calm and collected manner was gone. Her face was going through a range of emotions from angry to devastated.
"I-I don't understand. How could you not like me? It doesn't make sense. I guess if you and her aren't together…I still have a chance. I'm not giving up on you Jake." She whispered.
I thought his eyeballs would pop out of his head then and all he did was make an exasperated groaning noise, run a hand through his hair and then walk swiftly towards me. He grabbed my arms roughly and placed them around his neck in one quick motion. Hoisting me to eye level, he brushed the hair out of my face and tilted my head back, licking his lips. His breath tickled my face and his hands around my waist, his chiseled chest against mine set my skin on fire. My pulse quickened and I knew I was blushing. Jake and I goofed off a lot but this wasn't…this was…this.
"Jacob, wait what are you-" I shook my head in protest.
"Shh, shh, shhh. Just be quiet." Jacob's voice was husky.
I didn't expect it, I still can't believe it, I thought it was some wild nightmare/dream gone wrong. But his lips crashed down on mine none the less. Almost instantaneously my palms sweated, my stomach felt the fireworks of a New York fourth of July, my heart was determined on bursting from my ribcage. Jacob Black was freaking kissing me. Me. Lacey Tareja.
And at first that's all it was, his mouth over mine. I don't remember who leaned into the kiss first but I knew that he bit my lip roughly, drawing blood and I opened my mouth, gasping in pain and pleasure.
It took me a minute to fully realize the situation. We were vigorously kissing, in the middle of lunchroom of high school students, which under normal circumstances wouldn't be a big deal. But we had caused a scene a minute ago and therefore the spotlight was still on us. And as much as it killed me to, I broke the kiss. Resting my forehead against his, I was aware of the fact that yes, we were still panting.
"Let me go." I said softly.
He obliged and let me slowly sink until I stood on top of his feet, still holding me close to him. I ignored the shaking in my knees, they were, needless to say, jelly and worthless. I grasped his forearms and disentangled myself Jacob, turning just in time to see a thoroughly shocked Genevieve. She made a small mewling noise before slapping a hand over her mouth and running out of the lunchroom, trying to contain her sobs.
Everyone in the lunchroom found something else to be preoccupied with. I immediately felt guilty. I couldn't believe it but I did.
"Jacob, why did you do that? I can't." I furrowed my brow and looked for anything in his expression.
His eyes were still hooded, something dark shadowing his normally soft brown eyes. His breathing was still hard and he looked fidgety, as if he were trying to contain something. I turned to walk away from him but he grabbed my arm.
"Hey, will you just wait a minute!" Jacob called after me as I pulled away and jogged towards Genevieve.
"What the hell are you thinking Jake?" It was Embry who yelled at him.
"She'll leave Lacey alone now won't she?" He said defensively.
"You're an idiot." Embry scoffed before going back to his lunch.
A million thoughts raced through my mind. The first was that Jacob had indeed kissed me and no, this wasn't some fantasy. And the kiss was…It wasn't just some regular old kiss behind the school you share with some chapped lipped creep. It was like kissing lightning. But a part of me felt disgusted. I knew that Jake hadn't done that simply because he wanted to. He did that to piss off Genevieve and get her off my back.
And I didn't know why that annoyed me. I didn't care that he used me but seeing Genevieve's reaction to it left me with an overwhelming urge to maim Jacob. So I followed the sound of her wails and ended up walking in the same bathroom she had insulted me in minutes ago. I heard her friends making fun of me, trying to console her.
"She's just some freak!"
"Don't worry about it, you're right Gene she's not good enough for him he'll realize his mistake."
"It doesn't matter cause she's already got him! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" She screeched and resumed her heaving.
They obliged and left in huff, pushing me aside. I cautiously entered, walking loudly to let her know my presence.
"Look I know I'm probably not your favorite person but hear me out." I interrupted.
"Fine." Genevieve wiped her eyes and let me speak.
"First off I'd like to apologize. I'm sorry for embarrassing you this morning in the bathroom by giving everyone a front-row seat to Underwear the broadway musical starring Genevieve." I earned a chuckle from her and continued.
"Most importantly, I'm sorry about what happened back there, sorry you had to see that. Nobody should have to be tortured like that, nobody should have to see their potential-significant other making out with the new girl. If I knew he was going to pull something like that I would have straight clocked him in the face. And I just want you to know that we're most definitely not together." I said sincerely.
"I love him. Why can't he see that we're meant for each other? It's like every time I see him…" She trailed off and searched for words to describe it.
"Look. You don't have to tell me twice. I know what it feels like, unrequited love. It sucks. And so does Jake. I don't know why he did that." I sighed, heavy-hearted.
"Do you love Jacob?" She asked.
"As a friend yes. But anything more than that… I don't know Genevieve. I'm not in the right state of mind at this moment. But I just want you to know that you should hold on. If it was meant to be it was meant to be. Don't give up because of that kiss, it meant nothing. He just did that so you would leave me alone." I lied smoothly.
"So…you're not my competition?" Genevieve replied in a puzzled tone as the bell rang.
"No. But if you want to know who the competition really is, you have to promise to lay off me." I stood up and offered her a hand.
"I will. I promise." She smiled and grabbed it.
"Bella Swann. Goes to Forks High School." I finally said.
"A pale face?" She gasped.
"You didn't hear it from me." I reminded and she nodded vigorously.
"Let's get cleaned up then, shall we?" I handed her a wet paper towel.
After a few minutes she asked me how she looked and I was actually shocked to say, beautiful. It was true, even without makeup she looked gorgeous. Her eyes seemed even brighter and her cheeks had a natural tinge of red to them. Her face wasn't even puffy. Curse her perfection.
"Hey Lacey, you're a good friend." Genevieve called out before we went our separate ways.
A weight was lifted off my shoulders then and I came to realize why I felt so guilty, why I empathized with Genevieve. Seeing her crying and storming out of the lunchroom when Jake kissed me, it reminded me of myself whenever Jake and Bella were together.
Anger rose from the pits of my stomach then. I can't believe that dumbass had kissed me. He can't just go around proclaiming love to Pale Face girls and then turn around and kiss me. He simply didn't have clearance. Or authority. Or the balls!
I marched right up to the Pack's lunch table, angry when I realized he wasn't there.
"Where the hell is Jacob?" I yelled.
Everyone slowly looked at each other before shrugging.
"Probably off kissing some other ditz. That tool. If you see him tell him I'm looking for him." I smiled sweetly before stomping away.
I would find him and I would castrate him. Mark my words!
A/N:
? Did you like? They finally kissed. Except not really, cause he only did that to piss off Genevieve. But it was such a good kiss. Except…she's mad now. Hehehehohohehehe.
Okay school is out for me in a week (be still my beating heart!) and then I can properly dedicate time and energy into this story.
Until then, my lovelies.
L.T.