I was back at work and during classes, thinking about what happened yesterday. Two taken doctors from the hospital, one already dead, and Danny throwing up with mistletoe. I stared through the window and bit my nail. I was irritated and disturbed. I wanted to be out of work as soon as possible and back in the loft, with Derek.
My phone vibrated on my desk. I left my students and answered it in the hall.

- Deaton's been taken - Stiles blurted out instead of a greeting. I frowned.

- As another sacrifice? - I slumped on a bench.

- No, as a candidate to a world's miss - was his sarcastic reply - Of course as a sacrifice - I could imagine him flailing his hands. I huffed.

- How do you know? - I rubbed my temple.

- He called Scott - I rose my brows - Listen, can you get here? The clinic or school? I could really use your help, Agnes… please - there was desperation in his voice. And fear. I placed my head against the wall and huffed again.

- Ok - I said finally - but I have to finish my classes first.

- Ok, ok, thanks… - I could hear his father in the distance and Stiles ended the call abruptly.

As I said, I finished my classes and had to lie to my supervisor again. He started suspecting something was wrong because of how many days I was absent at work. I told him I have problems that are not easy to deal with and assured I will continue my classes and my PhD, of course.
I called Derek to tell him I'm going to the kid's school and he told me about the Alpha's symbol painted on his window. I stopped mid step.

- Derek… - there was a warning, worry and irritation in my voice.

- I'm with Isaac and Boyd - I rose my brow - Go help Stiles and come in the evening - he said to me.

- Derek… - this time it was a plea.

- I'm fine, go help them - he said with more force, but not ordering me, and ended the call.

I frowned and looked at my phone. I wanted to smash it on the ground to release some irritation, but restrained myself. It had cost too much.

I stepped into the school's building and already regretted it. I hated high school. Those were the worst years of my life. Because of the teachers and because of the teens. And because of myself. I didn't like myself back then and stepping in that same atmosphere now was not doing any good to me.
I found the class, Stiles texted me about, and saw him, Cora and Lydia around one of the desks. Between them was an Ouija board. I lifted my brow at that.

- You came - Stiles said little nervous and happy at the same time.

- Yeah - it was evident I wanted to be somewhere else - Hi - I said to all of them and then asked Cora - Do you know about the symbol on the window? - she just nodded and I sighed - What are you doing? - I motioned the board.

- Wasting time - Cora said bored. I glared at her.

- I agree - said Lydia and pouted. Oh, I have forgotten how princes-like she always acted.

- For God's sake - Stiles started to flail his hands - Morrell said you might be the only person who can find him - I frowned.

- Who is Morrell?

- Deaton's sister and schools' guiding council - Stiles filled me in and I frowned again.

- I hate guiding councils - the three of them looked at me weirdly.

- Ok… - Stiles pulled something out from his pocket - These are Deaton's keys for the clinic - they were hanging on his finger in front of Lydia's face - Close your eyes and I'm gonna put them in your hand and then we're just gonna try and see if you can feel out for his location - she made an unimpressed face - It's called psychometry…

- I'm not a psychic - the teen pointed and I started to think how wrong I was in my judgment about her and Stiles… But they definitely smelled different than humans.

- You're something! Okay? - Stiles lost his nerves and I touched his hand. Cora rolled her eyes, but remained silent.

- Just do it, Lydia - I said surprisingly calm.

Unsurprisingly, the experiment with keys was a fiasco. I even hold them for a moment, but haven't felt anything. I started thinking.

- Lydia, did Deaton do anything more after he gave you those books to read? - I turned my head to the side and regarded her. She shook her head.

- When I went to return them and asked if he's going to borrow me some more, he said there is time and I don't need to worry about it - she shrugged.

- That bastard… - my anger rose - He's playing for time and keeps us in the dark, but when the ground shifts under his feet he unceremoniously asks for help - I bailed my fists and my knuckles became white.

- So what? We're just gonna let him die? - Stiles spread his arms out - I remind you he did help us - I glanced at him.

- And that's the only reason we'll try to help him, because he might help us again. But I, personally, don't trust him - I was starting to feel more disturbed and restless. And I didn't like it, not a bit.

Stiles picked a pencil and gave it to Lydia. She started to draw something and it occurred to me it's a tree.

- The tree of life - it was the first thought that popped into my mind. Teens looked at me weirdly - There's a movie with that title - I explained although it didn't mean anything to them - But from my perspective it also looks like roots under ground - I moved from the table.

- Does it mean he's buried somewhere under a tree? - Stiles asked with hope.

- I don't know - I shrugged - But I can't stay here longer, Stiles. I have to go... - I looked at him with sorry eyes and he huffed.

- Yeah, I know - he was down.

- Are you going to Derek? - Cora asked and I just nodded.

I was exiting the class, leaving them arguing, when I came face to face with Scott. He was holding his left shoulder and under his fingers was blood. I frowned and growled.

- Who did this to you? - I asked dangerously, but a suspect was already in my mind - Deucalion? - he lifted his brows at me.

- How did you know?

- Because only he would have the nerve to do it in a bright day - I was already in the hall, trying to catch his scent.

I didn't know if he was the reason I was so disturbed. I walked the halls and was more and more irritated. I think Deucalion was long gone and I should probably do the same.
I was heading to the exit, when I felt something weird. It was that feeling like something was off and out of place. I picked up my pace, but suddenly felt extremely weak and almost fell to the floor. It didn't happen, because I was grabbed by two strong arms. Before I blacked out, I thought I saw the faces of those alpha twins…

I felt like I had a migraine attack, except my head wasn't in pain. I had no strength in me, but it didn't bother my body as I wanted to throw up constantly. I was powerless and lifeless. I didn't understand why some hands were holding me, moving my body, making me walk, when all I wanted was to lay down and sleep. My eyes were blindfolded and I couldn't use my other senses because I simply didn't have the strength to even think about it. I was like a puppet, which was moved the way the puppeteer wanted.
Suddenly the blindfold was taken off, but I still couldn't see anything. My sight was blurred. It was dark around me and I think I heard voices. A woman's and a man's. The second reminded me of something, but I was too weak to think what it was. Then were snarls and the sound of water. I remembered the water calms me.

I tried to fight with that overwhelming weakness. I concentrated on it and though my breaths became shorter and more ragged, I felt it subsided. You might think it's weird, but that is how I work. When I focus all my senses on pain or for example fatigue, I always somehow feel it subsides.
So, my hearing was getting better, along with my sight and when I heard a roar everything went back. I was back.

- Derek! - I shouted from the top of my lungs, but it probably was just a hoarse word for the rest of them.

I recognized all of them. Derek was fighting with Kali in his loft turned onto a poll. I was held by the twins and could feel Isaac and Boyd somewhere to my right. Where was the rest? Where was Cora, Scott, Stiles and Lydia?
I started to struggle with the teens, but it was in vain. I was still not in my full strength. As I got more and more frustrated, I felt my Feline waking up. Finally. It was about time.
I noticed Isaac running towards me and then water sparkled with electricity.

- No! - I shouted again and reached my arms in Derek's direction, but Isaac grabbed me.

Now I struggled with him as I wanted to move to Derek, but he just hugged and shushed me, making circles on my back. The twins were watching carefully what was happening in the middle of the loft as Derek, Kali and Boyd were electrocuted.

- Take him! - Kali shouted and I knew something bad was going to happen.

Each of two boys grabbed Derek's hand and moved it up, his claws on display. Kali grabbed Boyd and moved with him to them. I already knew what she was going to do.

- No! Gods, no! - I shouted and struggled with Isaac with new force. I should have killed her when I had the chance. I should have fucking killed her.

When that bitch threw Boyd on Derek's claws Isaac hid his face in my hair and tightened his grip on me, while I looked at it all with eyes wide open and muttered curses. The air around me vibrated with electricity and I was afraid it might hurt him.

- I'm giving you till the next full moon, Derek - the bitch said as she turned her back to him and moved closer to me - Make the smart choice. Join the pack or next time I'm killing all of you - she turned to him again and I had to fight the urge to jump her back and break her spine - Not so tough now, hmm kitty? - she said menacingly as she walked past me. I snarled at her and would make a move, but Isaac was smarter than me in that moment and stopped me.

The twins moved behind her and left the loft quickly. I watched Derek, shocked about what he just was made to do and wanted to cry, but there was no strength in me to cry. I was wracked. I leaned on Isaac, lifeless. I couldn't even feel Boyd's pain or Derek's grief.

- It's ok - Boyd said with one of his last breaths.

- No, no. No, it's not. It's not - Derek repeated, like I earlier repeated curses.

- It's all ok, Derek - Gods, I'm gonna miss this kid so much.

- I'm… I'm sorry - Derek said and I felt a sting in my heart. My empathy was working again or was it the connection I had with Derek?

- The full moon. That feeling… That was worth it - the kid said like he tried to soothe Derek. Like he wasn't dying in his arms just now. I wanted to crawl to them and hug them both - There's a lunar eclipse. I always wondered what… what that felt like for one of us…

He slumped lifelessly to the floor… or maybe Derek didn't have any more strength to hold him. He stared at his hands and regretted he had them as they brought death to this kid. I whined. At Boyd's death, Derek's grief and my helplessness.

I started to free myself from Isaac's embrace, when Stiles, Cora and Lydia showed. Cora ran to Boyd, held his body in her arms and started crying. Her grief added to mine and Derek's in my heart. Stiles ran to Derek, moved his hand, but then stopped. He looked at me like he was waiting for my permission, I nodded and he placed his hand on Derek's shoulder and squeezed it. It was good someone finally touched him. If I could I would do it ages ago, but was too weak to move.

Derek's hands shook and I didn't know if he was crying, because his face was already wet from water he fought in. With a corner of my eye I noticed Lydia leaning on the door. I freed myself with ease from Isaac as he was no longer hugging me so tightly and started to crawl down those couple stairs.

- Derek… - I called him with pained voice and he turned his head in my direction, finally noticing there are others in the loft, except him and Boyd.

He opened his mouth, but nothing came out of it. I looked at him with sad eyes, it was sadness for him. He too crawled in my direction, like he had no strength to stood up. When he finally was within my reach I embraced him as tightly as I was able right now. He was wet and cold, but I didn't care. He was in my arms, safe and that counted. It somehow gave me strength or maybe whatever it was that caused me to be so weak stopped working.
I moved back to look into his eyes. They were restless. I cradled his face in my hands and stroked his cold cheeks with my thumbs. He was shaking. Wanted to say something, but I stopped him.

- I know, I know - in fact, I didn't know, but it didn't matter. I just said that to calm him a little. To calm this scared boy he suddenly became and I wanted to take care of - Isaac, you have the car? - I don't know if it was the alpha female status that was kicking in, but I started to act.

- Yeah… - he was little crestfallen.

- Take it and help Cora leave Boyd's body in the woods - all of them looked at me - I'm sorry, but I think it has to be like that. Then drive her to my place - I turned to Cora - You and Derek are staying with me tonight - she just nodded - Stiles, can you drive us to my place? And then drive Lydia home - he nodded and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

- I'll call Scott and ask if he found Deaton - I nodded, but honestly didn't care about it.

- And someone do something with that water… - I said into air and was surprised Lydia stepped into the water and started to do something.

The ride to my apartment was quiet. Even Stiles wasn't saying anything. Me and Derek were in the back, tugged in an old blanked Stiles had in his jeep, but in that moment it was the best blanket I had ever seen in my life. I regained some of my strength and was hugging Derek more firmly now, rubbing his arms to made him a little warmer and to soothe him. He was still in shock and absent minded.

I had to lie to Monica and Paul that there has been an accident in Derek's apartment and he and his sister are going to spend the night in our apartment. Well, it wasn't entirely a lie. Paul immediately went to the living room and prepared the spare bed for Cora and I sat Derek on the toilet and started to fill the tub with hot water.

- I killed him… - he said quietly as I bustled around the bathroom. I froze and listened if any one of my roommates was nearby.

- No, you didn't. It was Kali - I took his face in my hands and made him look at me - You understand, Derek? It was her, not you - I whispered with force. He frowned.

- But…?

- No buts. It was her - I ran my hand through his hair - Jesus Christ, Derek, you can't take another burden on yourself. You can't blame yourself for another thing baby… - I shook my head and almost stomped my foot. I was so worried and sad for him. I wanted to protect him from everything, but knew it was impossible.

I felt his inner pain and it took my breath away. I whined and he put his shaking hands around me. Only then I remembered he was still cold.
I quickly undressed him and put into the hot water. His skin became bright pink from the temperature. As I washed him, I kissed his cheek, neck, shoulder and his hands. It was to say to him: it's ok; you're safe now; I'll take care of you; you don't have to worry; I'm here with you and for you.

The water was still warm. I sat on the edge of the toilet and placed my chin on his arm stretched on the tub rim. I stroked it and he stroked my wrist with his other hand. Our faces as close as possible. I stroked his hair. I wanted to find the words to soothe him more, but couldn't… and then I found them:

And if the darkness is to keep us apart
And if the daylight feels like it's a long way off
And if your glass heart should crack
Before the second you turn back
Oh no, be strong

Walk on
Walk on
What you got, they can't steal it
No they can't even feel it

Walk on
Walk on
Stay safe tonight…

I stopped whispering to the melody of "Walk on" by U2 and kissed his arm. He looked at me and whispered back:

- I love you…

I froze and was sure I misheard him. I felt like hit by a lightning bolt and would fall to the floor, but my whole body tensed and I felt acid in my mouth. I widened my eyes and immediately lifted the lid I was sitting on. I didn't have anything in my stomach from morning's breakfast, so I threw up with gastric acid. Fuck this shit! I hated to throw up, I so fucking hated it.

I was gasping and tried not to cry as my eyes become wet. I also tried to calm down. Only then I felt Derek's hand on my back, making soothing circles and his other one tugging my hair behind my ear. I looked at him. I must have looked awful and stank. I wanted to flush the toilet, but he stopped me. I frowned. What interesting could there be?

- Mistletoe… - he whispered shocked - and catnip - I stared at him - You were poisoned. Did you eat something? - he almost shook me and I booted my system after a crash.

- No… Only breakfast - he scowled - So, I'm not pregnant? - honestly, it was the first thought after I started puking.

- No - he looked at me sour and flushed the toilet.

- Good - I nodded my head.

I wanted to brush my teeth, but Derek first asked me about towels. I gave them to him and finally refreshed my mouth. I leaned on the sink and closed my eyes. My life became a rollercoaster that moved with exorbitantly high speed.

- Agnes… - I heard his worried whisper next to my ear and felt his hands on my arms. I leaned my back to his naked chest and sighed.

- What's going on, Derek? - I was getting tired, physically and emotionally.

- I don't know - he hugged me from behind and kissed my head.

Minutes later Cora came. She brought a change of clothes for Derek. Good, she finally started acting like his sister. His wet ones were now drying in the bathroom and he was already in my bed, comforter pulled almost over his head. I showed her her bed and told to use the bathroom, while I made them something to eat and hot tea. The three of us somehow squeezed on my bed and we ate in silence. Then said goodnight to Cora and I walked her to the living room as I was going to the bathroom.

- You and Isaac didn't have any problems? - I whispered to her and she just shook her head - Are you sure? - she nodded this time - Ok, bye - I kissed her cheek and felt her shock, but also a little happiness.

- Bye - she said shyly and closed the door behind her.

- Derek?

- Yes? - he moved the comforter so I could get into bed.

- Why did you say I was poisoned? - I was surrounded by warmth. Not only from bed, but also from him. He was warm again and it was good, so good.

- Mistletoe poisons us. Werewolves. But mixed with catnip… I think it poisoned you and made you weak - I frowned.

- But how did it happen?

- I don't know… but I couldn't sensed you and it was… - his voice almost broke and he snuggled into me. We embraced one another and I kissed his head.

- It's ok now, I'm here - I stroked his hair.

Silence fell between us. I thought I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight, but I was tired and my eyes started to close on their own. The events of today flashing under my eyelids, thoughts and questions swirling in my head. Then, a particular one got my attention: I love you. It warmed my heart, but at the same moment made me very nervous. Derek noticed that.

- What's wrong? - he asked as he lifted his head and looked at me.

- I… I don't think throwing up was a reaction you expected after what you said to me - I lifted my brow and bit my lip.

- I don't expect anything from you - he said quietly not looking at me. At first his words hurt me a little - I may want a lot of things from you… but I know you'll do what you want - I grabbed his face in my hands and made him look at me again.

I wanted to say something, but didn't know what I could say, so I just kissed him passionately. It seemed Derek was better in expressing his feelings towards me than me myself or maybe it was because he was still in shock. But I knew this kiss was enough for him, just like he said: I will do what I want. And he knew that it was a way to seal things. Things I wasn't sure about, but sealed them anyway. Because it was about him, about Derek, and I knew I would agree to all what was about him.

- And I know the rest of that song - he said when we parted our lips - It reminds me of you - this time he stoked my hair and tugged them behind my ear. I recalled the rest of lyrics.

- I'm that bird? - he nodded.

- You love freedom and you could have flew away… but you didn't - I searched his eyes.

- How could I? I have told you, you're not alone anymore - he smiled a faint smile and I did the same.

- Yeah…

We kissed goodnight, as we always did when we went to bed together, and embraced by one another we drifted into so needed sleep.

I slept almost the entire next day. Cora and Derek made breakfast and I let myself from under the covers just enough to eat it. Yesterday's events took its toll on me and to gain all of my strength I had to sleep. Cora didn't want to go to school and I didn't have the energy to argue with her and let it be, Derek apparently too.

He looked and felt better than yesterday, but I knew it takes more than one night to cope with something like what had happened. He asked if I could take care of Cora for couple of days, because he wanted to be alone for some time. I didn't like the idea of him being alone, but respected his request nevertheless. He said that Kali will keep her word and we are safe from the Alphas. Yeah, for now, but it will end and we still have that Darach on our backs.

I hugged him goodbye and kissed his cheek, he did the same and even hugged his sister. I counted it as my small victory in making them closer as siblings.

Later, I texted him that if he needs anything I'm there for him. I know he knew that already, but I just wanted to remind him that. In moments like he was right now in his life people tend to do stupid and irreversible things. And I didn't want him to do that.

So, as I said, I slept almost the entire day. Cora occupied my laptop and I got up only to cook us some frozen food. While we ate I announced that despite tomorrow is Friday, she is going to school. I had my own things to do and didn't want her to know about them.

I turned the sign to "Closed" and locked the door.

- I have patients in 15 minutes - said Deaton as he emerged from his office.

- Then you have to hurry, because I'm your first - I unceremoniously walked past him and entered the exam room. He was frowning, but followed me.

- Why are you here? - he asked with his cautious curiosity. I noticed a set of small jars with various symbols on them. I started to sniff them.

- I was poisoned - he rose his brows and I picked up a jar with mistletoe - with this and catnip. Did you have anything to do with it? - I narrowed my eyes at him.

- No - he shook his head - I had nothing to do with your poisoning - he said the full sentence so I could know he wasn't lying - But there is someone else who might - he moved from his spot.

- Darach? - I rose my brow and he just nodded - Is he working with the Alphas then? - Deaton frowned again and I knew I had to elaborate - I was poisoned and then the Alphas used me to made Derek kill Boyd - I didn't want to tell him all of this, but had the feeling only being honest with him will make him honest with me. He leaned on the table and sighed resigned.

- It started… - I frowned.

- What are you talking about? - I was getting worried more now. He was silent - Deaton… - I growled a warning.

- It was a spell and… it was my sister's doing… - he said finally with a sour face. All of my blood drained from my face.

- What have you just said? - I rounded the table and stood before him. My eyes cold, as my voice - Your sister? The guiding council? - he just nodded and I had to fight the urge to shove all those herbs into his mouth and pour it with bleach. So instead, I clenched my jaw and fists, moved away from him and roared my anger into the air - I won't kill her only because she's your sister - I said gasping, still angered and he was looking at me with wide eyes - Is there a way to protect yourself from it? From that spell?

- I can make a hex bag… - he said after a while.

- And it will work? She or anyone else won't surprise me like that anymore? Because I swear, if… - I wasn't able to finish my threat, because he cut me off.

- It will work. It will protect you from any spell cast by a druid - he assured me and I regarded him.

- It better - I threatened again.

I spent the weekend in the company of my close friends. Anna's, Martin's and Eva's. Eva is one of my three friends, that one with the lovey-dovey boyfriend. Thanks to all Gods, she came without him. We were celebrating my 27th birthday by going to a cabaret and then, the next day the three of us (only girls) went to the theater. I forgot for a moment about all that supernatural shit that was going on and just spent some time with my friends, feeling happy.

But I couldn't help checking my phone more often than usual. I was afraid Stiles will call any minute and tell me about next murders or Cora that something is wrong. I was also waiting for any sign from Derek. It was already three days from the last time I saw him and this waiting made me very uneasy. Very, very uneasy.