He laid back and closed his eyes as if concentrating. When she heard his breathing return to a more normal pace, she rolled over toward him to look in his eyes. It was then that she noticed the pillows on the bed. They had been torn to shreds. She couldn't help the gasp that escaped her. His eyes shot open and stared into hers. He couldn't tell if she was scared, shocked or surprised.
"I told you I wouldn't bite you." He spoke very quietly. "I-I'm sorry." Nessie barely whispered. His face changed to a more soft but serious glare. "You have nothing to be sorry for Ness, it's not your fault, I told you I can't completely control my instincts." Her eyes seemed to be searching his but he didn't know what for.
She dropped her eyes from his then "I'm sorry I asked you to do this, it was so selfish, I-I…" Ryan cut her off and forced her to look at him. "Nessie, listen to me, as long as you don't regret what we did, then neither do I. I wouldn't have done it if I didn't want to. If anyone should apologize it's me, cause I shouldn't have agreed to it. But I loved every second of it, and as long as your ok with it, then I don't regret it." She took in his words and a small smile crept on her face. "I don't regret it. Thank you". Her voice was so quiet and soft. He pulled her in his arms and held her there. She knew she should get up and go to her own room but she was too exhausted so she let sleep take her over.
When she woke she was alone in Ryans bed but she heard the shower running in the bathroom. She thought of what they did last night and a sudden worry crept through her. While she didn't regret it, she hoped that hadn't ruined their friendship in any way. She heard the water shut off and a moment later Ryan stepped in the room wearing only his boxer briefs. This was nothing new for her. She had seen him in his underwear plenty of times and he in hers.
The worry must have been etched on her face cause when he looked at her he immediately ran over to the bed. "Ness, what's wrong?" He sat down beside her. She was quiet at first. "Ness, please, talk to me." Ryan was getting worried. Finally she spoke. "It's just…well….are we ok?" He looked at her confused for a moment so she tried again. "I mean...our friendship?" She wouldn't look at him when she said the last words. "Ness, look at me." She refused to look at him. "Renesmee, please."
This time she lifted her eyes to meet his. She was scared. "Listen to me Renesmee. You are my best friend, nothing will change that, nothing has changed that. I will always be here for you." Then a small sly smile crept on his face. "For whatever you may need." She saw the playful glint in his eyes and couldn't help but laugh softly. He bent over and kissed her forehead then he got up and grabbed a t-shirt from his closet. He tossed it at Nessie and she slipped it on under the covers and then pulled them back.
She was sitting on top of them now since the shirt came down to her knees it was like a short dress. "You have some explaining to do you know." Ryan looked at her curiously now as he slid on a shirt of his own."What about?" "What you said last night, about Jake, that he imprinted on me." "Ohhhh that." Ryan didn't sound very enthused. "How bout I make you breakfast first and then we talk. You must be starving." "Ok, sounds good."
Ryan walked out to the kitchen but Nessie went to her room. She knew she would have to shower but for now she just slid on a pair of boy shorts panties and a pair of Capri sweats. She ran the brush quickly through her tangled hair and then went out to the kitchen.
Ryan was cooking bacon and eggs and he even had strawberries sliced for her. When he was done cooking he put it on the plates and joined her at the table. "It looks great." Nessie knew he could cook. It was a hobby he had picked up. "Thanks, I hope it taste as good." He replied playfully. They ate in silence but it wasn't awkward or anything. When they were done he took the plates and washed them then sat back at the table.
"Alright Ness, here's the deal. I will tell you what I can, but I want no more secrets about Jake or what you do know about him. You have to be honest with me and I will be honest with you." "Ok, well I don't know much, I mean, I haven't known him that long like I told you. He is as you know a wolf. I've met two of his pack members. Seth is…." "Whoa, hold on, don't you mean his pack brothers? Members would imply that he was in charge of the pack." Nessie suddenly looked down away from Ryan's gaze.
"Well, he is. In charge I mean. It's his pack." "Awww fuck Ness, he's an alpha? I am so seriously screwed now if we're not careful." "I don't think Jake would hurt you Ryan, not unless you…." "Ness you don't understand." Ryan took a deep breath and then spoke again. "Alpha's are the most powerful, the strongest of the wolves, that's why they lead. They don't let anyone mess with their pack, and they are possessive about their mates. They don't like any other male touching them for any reason."
Nessie looked at him a bit confused. Ryan sighed knowing he had to explain the imprinting now. "When a wolf imprints on someone, it means he has found his mate, the one person he is meant to be with. It's not something they can control, it just happens. All he has to do is see her, and that's it, he knows that she's the one and he won't ever touch another female. It's like a force pulling him to her, and her to him. Usually when it happens, neither of the two fight it because it just feels so right, so natural to them, they know they belong together. There are a few times when the female, while she may feel the connection, she doesn't understand it so it takes longer for a relationship to become of it. But in the end, they always end up together. Don't you see Ness, Jake imprinted on you. That's why you felt so drawn to him. That's why he wants you so bad. That's why he acted the way he did in the forest and at the club last night. I'm surprised actually that he didn't follow us here and rip me apart then." Ryan ran a hand through his hair and watched Nessie.
She was shocked but there was also a bit of confusion in her eyes. "Wait, if that's true, and he did imprint on me, then why does he keep pushing me away? Why didn't he just take me as his when he could have? It doesn't make sense." Ryan thought about that for a moment. "I'm not sure how he fought the urge, but from what you told me, it sounds like he wanted to give you a choice. He was conflicted between wanting to be with you and taking away your choice in the matter. He's an alpha so it must be killing him to watch you with me and to be fighting his instincts. As it is if he finds out what happened between us, he's going to lose it. He knows that this is a forever thing Ness, he wants you to choose him because its what you want, and not because of the imprint." Nessie took this all in and then a flash of anger crossed her eyes. "He has no right or reason to be angry. It's his own fault he wouldn't take me when I asked him too, and it's his fault that he didn't tell me what was going on." With that she got up and stalked toward the door.