The Art of Being a Hostage
Dick sighed as he tried to shift and get more comfortable. Unfortunately, when you're tied to a chair with your own tie used as your gag, that was impossible. It had started off as a good day too. Bruce had decided that he would sponsor a team bonding trip to a private island. It would be one week of relaxation on a tropical island in the Caribbean. His day had only gone wrong after masked men had invaded the school and started shooting at the ceiling. Knowing that more people would be hurt if the police were to arrive before they could escape, Dick offered himself up in return for the freedom and safety of everyone else.
Which is how he ended up tied to a chair, and completely and utterly bored. The men weren't even that original. In the five years since Bruce had taken him in, he had been a hostage a total of fourteen times. The fact of the matter was that all kidnappings followed the same plotline. He was kidnapped and tied up. Kidnappers came and asked him to talk to Bruce through a video or phone call. He got punched a few times for mouthing off. He faced severe boredom. He escaped using his mad skills. And finally, the Justice League came to save him. Minus Batman of course, Bruce was always the first civilian that he saw.
Dick tried to crack his neck. He had to give the guys credit. They knew how to tie up a hostage. They were on the other hand behind schedule. By now, they should have already come to supply proof of life. What were they trying to accomplish? Bruce already knew he had been kidnapped, as it was witnessed by everyone at Gotham Academy. Not to mention Artemis witnessed it.
Dick paused. If Artemis knew that he had been kidnapped, would the Young Justice team be coming for him instead of the Justice League? If that were the case, he would have to be on his best behavior. He would have to make Bruce proud of his trolling abilities. Especially because he had just found out that Baby Bruce had been messing with him the whole time.
As thoughts of messing with his teammates swirled through his mind, Robin took a moment to fully observe his surroundings. He was in what appeared to be a warehouse with nothing in the room except him and the chair. Large beams connected to the rafters and created daunting shadows that would even impress Batman. More importantly, they would create a perfect hiding spot.
By the time the kidnappers finally arrived, Dick had formed a general plan on how to mess with the team if they did in fact show up. Dick had a feeling that it would be Superman who assigned that mission and that he would wake up to find that all his clothes had the Bat Clan patented kryptonite itching powder in them again.
Dick allowed the men to record a video of him. He decided to amp it up by saying, "Help me Bruce T. Wayne, you're my only hope."
The kidnappers didn't seem to get what he found so funny, but didn't press the issue. Dick felt indignant when one of them muttered, "Rich kids." You did not have to be rich to enjoy cinematic masterpieces such as Star Wars.
When the men left again, Dick figured that this was his chance. He contorted his body in a way that would not be possible for most people, and shimmied out of his bindings. He wondered if kidnappers would ever get smarter. Hopefully not. Deciding to play it safe and not reveal his identity, Dick shimmied up the steel beams and sank into the shadows of the rafters. It would be impossible to spot him unless a person knew where he was to begin with.
Dick watched with an amused smile as someone came in to check on him and found nothing but an empty chair and a pile of ropes. His amusement grew further when the rest of the men responded to the first one's shouts and ran in. He tensed slightly as they began to look for him but relaxed when he realized that they never looked up. Kidnapping 101 was too know all about your target, and obviously these guys did not know the first thing about him if they hadn't figured out that a circus brat was going to climb up and not stay on the ground.
When the warehouse door exploded off it's hinges, Dick could hardly count himself as surprised. It was about time that someone had come to rescue him. Even if he did not need rescuing.
Dick watched quietly as his team burst through the opening and quickly took down the opposition. It was probably the first time that something in their mission had not gone totally wrong.
Dick watched as Wally zoomed around the room like a chicken without its head. "He's not here! Why isn't he here! Artemis aren't these the right guys? What's going on! What if he's hurt! I can't live with myself if he got hurt! How else will I get my supply of cookies! He's my bro!"
Dick couldn't help himself. He burst out laughing. He laughed so hard that he ended up hanging upside down, using his legs to hold onto the beam tightly.
"Speedy? What's got you so worried? I don't even know you! Besides the only friend I supply with cookies is Wally. You wouldn't happen to know him would you? If he's feeding you my cookies, tell him he can say goodbye to them. They were meant for his mouth only. Well maybe his Uncle Barry's too."
Dick internally smirked as Wally froze and started to freak out. Of course he knew that Dick Grayson knew who they all were, but nobody else did. Which was what made this fun.
"My name's Kid Flash." Wally ground out. Dick blinked innocently before shrugging. He was still upside down, so he didn't know if they caught the movement.
"Whatever. Can you guys move, I'm gonna jump down. It's been forever since I had this much height to work with." With that, he swung and let his body flip in the air. He felt the air rush by his face until it suddenly stopped.
Opening his eyes, he found himself floating, surrounded by a soft green glow that he knew to belong to Miss Martian's powers. He struggled momentarily, but was ultimately placed softly on the ground before M'gann rushed over to him. "Are you alright? You could have been seriously hurt! Why did you jump?"
Was she messing with him? "I told you, it's been forever since I got that kind of height! I would've been fine. Grew up in a circus and all that. I know how to roll before flipping into a few handsprings to break my fall."
When he received no response, Dick decided that it was officially time to mess with them. "So...you guys like the sidekicks or something? The only one I recognize is the speedster over there."
Kaldur offered a tight smile. "We are a team founded by the Justice League. Although we prefer the term 'partner' to sidekick."
Dick looked around while waving his hand dismissively. "Is Robin here? Word on the streets is that he joined a team and that's why he isn't around as often."
"I'm afraid Robin had a previous engagement." Kaldur said stiffly. There was something about how the boy disregarded him that got on his nerves.
"That's too bad. I was hoping to make this lucky number seven." Dick sat down in his abandoned chair and started to mess around with the ropes. When he received a bunch of blank looks, he sighed. "The number of times he's rescued me from a kidnapper. Although these days, I've turned into quite the escape artist. Perhaps I should ask Bruce to help me find Zatara so that I can thank him properly."
Dick shifted and gave Wally a sly smile. "Hey Flash Boy? Are you ever gonna introduce me to your girlfriend?" Dick explained further upon seeing Wally's confused face. Poor Wally, he deemed himself a ladies man but did not understand his own feelings. "The archer that is in no shape or form Speedy, who's sarcasm and sass lends him to be one of my favorite heroes."
"I'm afraid that I did not know that you knew Speedy." Kaldur replied after a moment of silence.
"I know a lot of people. For example I know this girl named Artemis at my school, who looks a lot like Flash Kid's girlfriend over here." Dick smiled sweetly, and cackled internally at Artemis' panicked look. This was definitely worth being kidnapped again!
"He meant heroes." Conner cut in gruffly.
Dick tilted his head to the side. "Sure. I know the Justice League. Who do think usually saves me when I'm kidnapped. Not to mention Batman and Robin."
It was Artemis who finally asked, "I get why you've met Batman and Robin. But why would the rest of the League go through the trouble of rescuing you?" A moment later she added, "No offense."
Dick pondered it for a moment before he let the proverbial bomb drop. "Probably because Bruce foots a majority of the bill for the Justice League. Who do you think pays for the destroyed buildings, the Watch Tower, and all the food. Not to mention the research, the weapons, the transportation, and the communication. If Bruce decided to suddenly stop funding the League, there wouldn't be a Justice League anymore."
Dick heard the police sirens in the distance. "I do believe that's your queue to go. Don't worry, the tale of your heroism will be adequately told." Dick started to walk to the entrance of the warehouse when he paused. "By the way, it took you guys two hours, fifty three minutes, and twenty nine seconds to rescue me after I had been kidnapped. The League usually has me out after an hour."
Dick walked away whistling to the sounds of his disgruntled teammates. When the police arrived, he fell into Bruce's waiting arms before telling the police how he managed to escape his bounds and hide before the sidekicks showed up and took out the kidnappers.
The next day, newspapers around the country were reporting that sidekicks from some of the major heroes had managed to rescue poor Richard Grayson. Much to the teams annoyance and Robin's delight, most of the article focused on how Robin was not there at the time due to a previous engagement, and speculations of what that could have been. The article also managed to mess up every one of their names but Richard Grayson's and Robin's.
Dick was lounging in his bed snacking on a cookie while reading the article when he received a text from Wally.
Wally: Dude. Artemis is freaking out about 'Dick Grayson' knowing who she is
Wally: That was kind of mean
Wally: And she's not my gf!
Dick: But you want her to be
Dick: I was just nudging you guys along as an unbiased spectator
Wally: ...
Wally: Why did you tell her that she looks like herself?
Dick: No response to wanting her to be your gf?
Wally: Shut up you dick!
Dick: Yes Wally?
Wally: Shut up and answer the question!
Dick: I'll show you why
Dick entered his phone's photo gallery and selected his most recent photo before grinning and hitting send. Like a true son of Batman, he had managed to take a photo of Artemis, without anyone noticing, right after he had compared her to the Artemis he knew from school.
In the photo, her face was turning a delicate shade of pink and she was sputtering, obviously looking for a response. Dick liked to think that if her were to post this photo on the internet it would go viral. He of course, was nowhere near that mean. Wally on the other hand, might do it without thinking of the repercussions. Which is why he sent it to Wally of course.
Wally: …
Wally: I forgive you
Wally: I'm gonna post this on my instagram
Wally: And my snapchat
Wally: Hold on I'm making a facebook account
Wally: Twitter here I come!
Wally: You haven't responded in a while
Wally: …
Wally: I just made a huge mistake didn't I
Wally: Dick, please help me erase from the internet
Wally: Dick?
Dick: The person you are trying to reach is not available. If you need tech assistance please press 1. If you need advice, please press 2. If you want to talk to a live operator, please press 3
Wally: 1,2,3
Dick: Please call this number….(xxx)xxx-xxxx
Wally dialed the phone number nervously. It was obviously not Dick's cell phone number, and he did not recognize it to belong to anyone else. Checking the time, Wally noted that it was around 3 a.m. Figuring that it was okay to dial the number as Dick had given it to him, Wally dialed.
"Hello?" a groggy voice asked. Wally panicked. This was not Dick! What should he do! "This is Bruce Wayne, how'd you get this number?"
Wally hung up and ran down the hall. Pounding on his uncle's bedroom door, he didn't wait to be told he could come in before dashing in. "Wally? What's the matter?"
"I need to change my phone number and move to Argentina!"
The absolute panic in his nephew's voice made Barry more alert. "What happened?"
With wide eyes filled with fear, Wally quietly said, "I think I just prank called Batman."
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A/N: Sometimes I wonder how my brain works. I went from Dick being a hostage to Wally prank calling Bruce by accident. Don't really know how that happened, but whatever. It turned out okay in the end I think.
As always, your reviews are beyond appreciated. Especially those who leave new ideas *hint hint nudge nudge* So here's what I have officially.
Story about how robin met the league (find video evidence)
April Fools Day (death day anniversary)
REalize Wally knows secret ID
Dick riddles
Contingency plans
Good with kids
Wally Dick bromance Princess0Bunny
Adoption process (sequel to ch. 15) Mikekit
Guarding Dick/Bruce Sophia the Scribe
Bruce trolling Princess0Bunny
Alternate Dimension (JL) BaeKat101
Joker/Fear gas Doggylove613
Keep in mind that I may have sudden inspiration and not write something on this list. If you suggested something that's not here, please remind me because I (in all likelihoods) wrote it down on a sticky note and forgot about it. Most of the time, I check reviews when I'm out of the house, so sometimes I'm bad and forget about the amazing things that you guys have said or suggested. I'm trying to be better about that.
.
.
.
Anyways...please review and chose which stories you like best!