Chapter 20: Choices
The courage of life is often a less dramatic spectacle than the courage of a final moment; but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy.
~John F. Kennedy
Edward left. Carlisle stayed. Speechless, we sat across from one another in the wicker chairs. I hugged my legs to my chest with my chin resting on my knees. I stared out into the backyard at nothing really. It is pitch black just like my bleak thoughts.
Sighing, I don't know how to defeat Blackhawk or even the possible spell he has casted upon me. A spell that keeps me overwhelmed and in a bad mood most of the time. It knows when I'm in a crisis which makes my body organs react on overkill to the point that could literally be the death of me which has almost succeeded. And a while ago, it created a blockage in my larynx where I couldn't protest Edward's statement about moving and finally making me forget something vital. I know it involved Sebastian, but that's all I can manage to remember.
Sebastian. My mother mentions Djin in reference to him at the beach. In folklore in the normal world, a nineteen-seventy TV show titled, 'I Dream of Kimmie', comes to my mind. Kimmie was a Genie. Major lets her out of captivity from a bottle and she becomes 'attached' to him. Kimmie wrinkles her nose to cast spells or grants Major his wishes. This is the only thing I can relate to what has happened in this world with my mother. Impossible as it seems, yet, it's true and real. But I don't know if this knowledge or the same rules applies here in the Twilight world; because vampires and werewolves here are quite different there in folklore.
Fact one, Sebastian and Blackhawk are brothers, meaning they are the same species in supernatural beings. Fact two, Blackhawk can travel through time, but Sebastian cannot. Does this mean Blackhawk cannot grant wishes? Fact three, Blackhawk mentions he'd put a spell on the next cork of Sebastian's bottle. Is Sebastian in captivity somewhere right now? Fact four, Sebastian can bring back the dead though it's their highest law not too. Is the soul of the Native Indian woman who I saw in the lightning enter baby me and teenage me? Why was Blackhawk so determined to change the past by stopping Sebastian? I don't believe his purpose was honorable at all. He cares nothing about his brother breaking a law because the fact that Sebastian said his brother put him in a bottle and left him there until my mother discovered it fifteen hundred years later at First Beach. Which causes me believe it was for a personal gain and I am in the way of it.
Fact five, Sebastian has written something on the wall in green paint in the garage. Is it a message and is it for me? Would it lead me to him? The wall is covered up with unmovable boxes leaning against it. I can't even get them open to see what's inside either. Fact six, Sebastian granted my mother's wish to go to another parallel world, though I didn't actually see how it was performed but I lived there for almost seventeen years and had no idea any of the these facts were true or even possible or believable.
There's also a punch. It's bittersweet, leaving a sour aftermath. Acknowledging that I might be half-human and half-Djin from Sebastian's claim in the garage, which by DNA that would mean I am related to Blackhawk and that really blows. Could it be possible he's after something I possess within? Why is he adamantly torturing me before trying to kill me?
So, if I had been raised to know about Genies or Djins, then maybe I'd have a fair chance at defeating an assumingly monstrous Uncle. But I don't know anything about them or much less their spells. My mother could have at least left a manual. Wait a minute, a manual? Instead of getting excited, I am certain that is what she kept under lock and key at the university; Professor Olivia Huntley's Thesis.
I've learnt and have begun to understand what sets off this possible certain spell. I don't believe Blackhawk knows about its antidote, yet. Or maybe it's something else entirely. I don't know but, most importantly is that I'd have to stay completely calm and be aware of it at all times, because I'd unleash the attack by getting anxious and it would be upon me quicker than a sneaky, snarling cobra.
Ugh! Under this most likely spell has made me into an erratic, pitiless ass with no common sense! For three days, more like dazes, I have not attempt to check my mother's briefcase for her Thesis. But before I can to go to my room and investigate this further, I have another situation much more pressing at the moment.
How I can I stop a coven of vampires from moving away without disclosing what I know? Would it be best if the Cullens did leave? Would their absence compromise the lives of others in the future? What are the consequences of their departure?
My instinct tells me total destruction and devastation, just as Alice has foreseen. Because without the constant Cullen presences, the Quileutes destined to transform will never come about and without the unity of the pack or packs, that unknown army I have already foreseen in my dreams as a child, cannot and wouldn't be defeated.
In such recent events, this leads me to believe that the unknown enemy wants the Cullens and the Quileutes to never unite as one in the future. Therefore making sure the other gifted covens and advanced humans meet the same fate as well.
I took a deep breath. "Carlisle,"
"Yes?"
"Will you please explain to me what happened with Emmett on Monday?"
Carlisle hesitates, debating.
I turn my head towards him, resting my ear on my knee. "Please?"
"Remember when in the hospital I explained to you that your blood is repulsive to us?"
"Yes."
"Well, it isn't that way for Emmett." Carlisle murmurs. I knew it.
"Is this the reason you're moving away? Because of me?"
"Yes." He answers solemnly.
I breathe deeply. "Do you trust me, Carlisle?"
"I don't know why I wouldn't or shouldn't." I raise my head.
"Then let me prove to you that what happened in that classroom was a hoax." I said quietly. This piqued Carlisle's interest.
"A Hoax? I'm not sure I understand or follow you, Sammie."
"Carlisle, I can't explain how I know this to be true. I just need you to trust and believe me. Please just give me the chance to prove it." I said calmly.
He slightly leans forward in his chair. "I protect human life, not end them, Sammie. It's not safe for you or Emmett." He unwaveringly stated, enfolding his hands.
"Trust me." I say in a calm voice. "If you don't, in the future there'll be much, much more carnage."
"She's absolute correct, Carlisle." a melodic voice came from the other side of the porch. I looked up just as Alice flitted over. I smile. I'm betting on Alice that my theory is true.
~o ~ O ~ O ~ O ~ o ~
After the formality of being introduced to Alice, she and Carlisle conversed with one another. I couldn't follow the conversation at all, though their lips moved in a fast technique, only understanding the gist of their voices which sounded like harps playing in the background. In no time, Carlisle relented to allow me to prove the hoax. But the condition is we would do this 'experiment' at the Cullen's residence. I had no objections of course.
That is until they left me alone on the porch to go confer with the others.
Asking to prove my point to Carlisle with gusto is entirely different from finding the courage to apply the actual action. Not to mention, I had to stay really calm, so very cool, dexterously collected throughout the process of being in same atmosphere as a vampire who just may well find my blood appetizing without any type of supernatural cause. But if it's the spell, and I'm not composed, it will spark from the erratic behavior and discharge Emmett's desire. Either way, I know if this goes badly, I'll have brought destruction to everything and misery to everyone in the future.
But, I feel like I have no other choice. It's a sacrifice I know I have to follow through. There are too many lives at stake. I couldn't live knowing I was the cause of their gloomy fate and didn't try, because after all, it's my entire fault for simply existing.
The chill in the air seems to intensify the goose bumps on my exposed skin. I shiver in my usual apparel and bare feet. I try to smother the fears as I sit here and wait for Carlisle's call. The other Cullen's, especially Emmett has to agree to this meeting of sorts in order to prove the hoax. What if they don't agree and move away from Forks tomorrow? Then what am I going to do? I begin to feel the anxiety creep in.
Briskly, I stand and promenade to the edge of the porch. "Sami," I call out into the darkness. "Come here, boy."
Utter Silence, only the bristle sound of the wind rifting through the trees. No signal of his movement in the backyard. I couldn't see in the pitch blackness and the glow from kitchen light only went so far. My gape went to the fenced kennel in between the porch and garage door. I strain my eyesight in scrutiny. I discover the gate door is shut and secured.
Puzzled, I went down the steps and walked over to it. Upon opening the gate, I called his name. A moment later, a sleepy Sami stuck his head out the green dog house. Welcoming the relief, I patted my leg for him to come to me. At first he seemed hesitant but then as he came, I kneeled down embracing him around the neck into a hug, cradling him to my chest.
How insane would it be if this is the very wolf cub my mother and Sebastian spoke of and searched for that day before I was born on the beach? Pretty ridiculous, Sammie! I scolded myself.
Gently, I pull back, cupping both palms under his ears, looking into his sweet eyes. "Now how did you close the gate all on your own?" I ask him. Attentively, I kiss him on top of his head and told him I'd see him in the morning. He quickly went back into his dog house with his tail clinging to his hind. Before I could ponder much about his skittish manner, my phone shrills on the porch. Exiting the kennel and securing the gate, I sprinted up the steps onto the porch. I pickup my cellphone from the end table and answer without looking who the caller is.
"Hello?" I said into the receiver, just a tad breathless.
"Sammie, its Carlisle,"-a short pause, enough I held a breath-"Everyone agrees to try." He said pensively. I breathe, opening the sliding door.
"Okay. I'll be there in a few." I said walking into the house, promenading to the breakfast bar for the my keys.
Carlisle hesitates to say bye. "Sammie, I'd like for you to wear the piggyback."
I roll my eyes in frustration, and proceed towards my room, upstairs. I just needed exercise and get back to my routine and starting running again. My lungs have become lazy is all and need strengthening, not assistance from a machine.
"Anything else, Doc?" I say. With each step up the staircase, the irritation eases.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked carefully.
"Yes." I say without hesitation. I reach my room, tuning on the light, and grab the exquisite oxygen backpack. Suddenly, my head begins to throb. Tension headache, maybe?
"Well then, Alice will be outside to greet you." He said as I enter the bathroom.
"Okay. See you in a few, Carlisle." I said, and then pressed the end button.
I set aside the iPhone and the piggyback on the white pristine counter. I open Aunt Maggie's medicine cabinet, looking for Tylenol. However, I discover a few prescription bottles and one of them is Lorezepam.
At the cadet junior police academy, we learned of different addicting substances in behavioral science class and one of them was Adivan; a tranquilizer. Although I don't condone this type of behavior, I'm most certain it will get rid of this throbbing in my brain. Besides, I needed something to keep me calm. Being with seven vampires in their own habitat and completely away from society is beyond petrifying.
Without a second thought about how wrong this is, I popped the little white pill in my mouth, turning the faucet on, cupping my hand underneath the sprout and then swallowing it with the stream of water. As I picked up the hand-towel lying neatly on the counter top to wipe my hands, I viewed myself in the mirror for a moment. I've gone through a lot lately and assume there would be a subtle change to my appearance as there was to the inner me. But there isn't.
The mirror reminds me; I needed a much thicker hoodie. Plus, Vampires have super sense of smell, 'Libby's Twilight Knowledge'; my hygiene has to be top-notch. I swiftly went back to the bedroom, took out a fresh tank-top out the dresser and opened the closet. I slipped off the tank, put the fresh one on, took an orange hoodie off its hanger and slipped it over the yellow tank. Oh crap. What if I have to use the bathroom? I went back to the bathroom and relieved my bladder. I rolled on deodorant and washed my hands and … I blew onto my hand, yup, and then I brushed my teeth. If I wouldn't have told Carlisle I'd be there in a few minutes, I'd even take a shower.
As soon as I administered the oxygen and adjusted the small leather backpack on my back, I grabbed my cell phone and finally descended the staircase towards the garage.
Thankfully, I no longer needed the binding around my ribs and could wear my tanks without the bulge. The x-ray's yesterday at the hospital proved the fractures in my ribs are healed along with my left wrist bone enough where I didn't need ace wear. When Libby mention Sam and Jared performed CPR Monday evening in one of many of her one-sided conversations, I had been worried of another possible fracture and I wouldn't have known. But there wasn't. I was relieved and grateful.
I made a detour to the fridge and took out a water bottle. On my way out, I picked up my keys off the breakfast bar and briskly went to the garage where my chariot waited. I haven't driven Tazzy since Saturday evening after that horrid tale in the ratty shed at the Uley's with the Quileute elders. I smile to myself knowing it's in shambles on the ground. Yet, it faltered, because what if that place held some good memory of Sam's.
Sighing, I seated myself in the Trans-Am. As I put the key in the ignition, I pushed the button for the garage door. I text Aunt Maggie to let her know I was going out and to the store for Ice Cream. It's not the whole truth, but the less she knows the better. If she were to read the text out loud around certain people, well, let's just say I'd have a lot of explaining to do and an interrogation by those people would follow. Besides, if I end up hurt, I didn't want anyone to suspect the Cullens. Even though I know Sam would. And I couldn't help to think that maybe he'd start a war because of it. I quickly shook my head of any bad thoughts especially matters of the heart.
So a lie it was. Sending the message, and setting the phone onto the passenger's seat, I put the car in gear and proceeded to the Cullens. I just hope I remember and can see the entrance to their drive-way.
A few miles later on the right side of the highway, someone is standing on the shoulder and waving flashlights in both hands. I should have known when Carlisle had said during the phone call that Alice would greet me outside, she would be, though I had no idea he meant the entrance of the three-mile drive into the residence.
Cautiously, I turn right onto the Cullen road and immediately came to a full stop. I pushed the button on my door to unlock the passenger's side and Alice slid into the seat so graceful, I couldn't look away when our eyes met. She smiles at me as the corners of my mouth lift, timidly into one.
Slightly nervous to have a vampire as a seat-mate, I looked straight ahead and continued down the dark road while "Never Think" begins playing softly through the speakers.
Gratefully, Tucker and Jessie had rewired the speakers for my iPod to retrieve the music Friday night while I slept. I didn't know this Saturday and still wouldn't have if Libby hadn't mentioned it today at lunch. Jessie told Libby the radio and cassette tape player was outdated and knew I'd want it replaced with my iPod. I hadn't used it since the night I came to Forks to notice it was missing from my room.
Alice shifts slightly in her seat. I gulp loudly. I have no idea what to say and I didn't want to sound uncool. I grip the steering wheel a bit tighter as the curves got tauter.
"I love this song. Do you know who sings it?" Alice probed in her melodic voice.
Uh. "I believe it's that English dude, right?"
"Yes! Robert Pattinson. I'm a massive fan by the way. He's such a fab musician. Don't you think so?"
"Sure." I agree.
Just as I was getting worried about driving too slow because it seemed as if the road kept growing instead of relenting to our destination, I finally saw lights through the trees.
After another curve, the big white house came into view. I pull up into the actual drive-way and put Tazzy in park along the steps that are ten feet away. I hook the car keys onto my pants loop as Alice holds out my cellphone towards me.
"It was in the seat." She explains.
"Oh right. I'm sorry, I forgot." I say as I take it. "Thanks."
"No problem." She said as I reach for the door handle. "Sammie, wait." I look at her and even though I don't know her too well, the expression on her face is serious as well as concerned. I settle back into the seat. "How sure are you?" she asked.
I took in a deep, slow breath. Honesty is extremely vital to this friendship. But, I have a feeling that an ounce of doubt would not get me through the Cullen's front door. I exhale, slowly. I'm not a good liar so I chose something that had a lot of merit. "Alice, I'm as sure as my mother lies in her grave tonight." I say looking at the dashboard as if it was particularly interesting than her golden eyes.
As seconds ticked by without a response from Alice, I looked over at her. Her head rested back against the seat with her fingers to her temples and her eyes were closed. I realize she must be searching the future. I counted and thirty-two seconds later, her eyes open. She lifted her head from the seat and looked into my eyes.
"I believe you." She said in a certainty, angelic voice. "Let's go inside. They're all waiting for us in the living room, except Emmett." Alice said opening the passenger's door. She stepped out of the car and closed the heavy door without the struggle I usually have.
Puzzled, I open my door and got out. As I view the well-lit wrap-around porch, I close my door and proceeded to where she stood, waiting, at the foot in front of the white wooden stairs. I notice the pot plants and ceramic angels and exquisite outdoor furniture. The white mansion is beautiful in the daytime, but at night, it was glorious. It didn't look like vampires, creatures of the night, lived here at all. It's so homey and inviting.
"Alice," I say as I took my last step before I halt aside her. "Where exactly is Emmett?"
"Emmett is in his and Rosalie's room playing the X-box." She rolls her eyes. "It's a new football game." She smirks and continues, "He'll join us when you've been properly introduced to the ones you haven't met." Alice said as she ascends the stairs. I follow closely behind her.
Eight steps to the doorway; my heart rate is normal, six steps; my oxygen seems at one hundred percent, four steps; my mood appears to be very calm, two steps; Oh no, stomach cramps! Please God, it's me, remember me, please don't let me pass smelly gas.
As we enter the front door, I'm not sure what I was expecting really, but this interior wasn't it. It was bright even for nighttime and precisely large. The first floor indeed had been renovated by mostly taking out all the walls and making it into a vastly wide living area. At the backside of the house is entirely glass. A massive curving staircase dominated the west side of the room. From the thick carpets, to the wooden floors, and the high-beamed ceilings are all varying shades of white including the walls.
Carlisle, in this lighting, struck me by his youthful perfection. He stood off to the left on a raised portion of the floor by a black grand piano and greets me with a kindly smile. As Esmé stood next to him, her beautiful heart-shaped face seems outrageously flawless with billows of soft, caramel-colored hair. She too, greeted me with a warm smile.
"You're very welcome, Sammie." Esmé said gently.
"Thank you. It's nice to see you again, Miss Esmé. You all have a very lovely home."
Esme's warm smile turns into an appreciative one. "Thank you, dear."
"Sammie," Alice brought my attention to her. She stood at the base of the curving staircase with Jasper. I've seen him before but not this close. He was tall and dignified and handsome. Alice is a midget standing next to him. "This is Jasper."
"Hello Jasper." I say. He dips his head but doesn't speak.
"Hello Sammie." My eyes shift back to Carlisle and Esmé, where the voice initiated and discover the flawless, angelic Rosalie is standing beside Esmé now.
"Hello Rosalie." I say evenly. My self-esteem didn't plop in her presence. I wonder why?
"Can I come down now?" a deep, majestic voice asked somewhere upstairs. Emmett?
"Just wait a few more minutes, Emmett," Edward said as he slowly came down the massive curving staircase. Was the stance intentional?
Uh wait, I remember Carlisle telling me in the hospital that Edward couldn't read my mind, so, did he just read my question? I gulp.
Alice joined Edward as they both walked towards me. Edward stopped a few feet in front, while tiny Alice places herself on my right side, just as Esme did on my left. Carlisle came over to stand aside on the right of Edward while Jasper came up on the left. I realize they were positioning themselves around me, though not too close.
I suddenly became super aware that I am surrounded by vampires. They may be vegetarian vamps, but that doesn't make me truly trust them. My stomach rumbles and I feel all their eyes shift to my abdomen. Oh please don't fart!
Suddenly I look directly at Edward to see if he acknowledges my embarrassing notions. No smirks, no laughter, nothing. But does that mean anything?
"EDWARD, look at me you blood sucking hoar! No acknowledgement. HERE IS YOUR FUTURE; Still no response, but I continue. You become manic-depressive, and then suicidal, forgetting all about being homicidal and you go to the Volturi and asked Aro to behead you! I breathe a sigh of relief when he doesn't make any notion that he hears me as him and Jasper deliberates about how Emmett should proceed. However, I've never been so mean and utter hateful words in my life to anyone. Edward, I now know you cannot hear me, but I'm truly sorry for those nasty words I said.
"Sammie, have you've- " Carlisle startles me as he begins in his doctor attentive manner that I knew all too well but paused when my stomach rumbles again, "-eaten anything today?" I almost nodded and realized I hadn't at all. Blushingly, I shook my head no, looking down at the floor.
"Oh honey," Esmé said placing her cold hand on my sleeved arm. Other humans would have felt a diversion. Not me, it felt really nice ...comforting. "Carlisle, I insist we put this …off until Sammie's had something to eat. I'll put a frozen meal in the microwave oven." A microwave and frozen food? What the hell do they need this when they don't even eat human food? And I guess they didn't know what to call this situation any more than I did.
I raise my head to discover their doing that fast movement with their lips again. But this time it sounded like a symphony as they all conversed around me. I gather there is an argument among them that I'm not hearing. I have to put an end to this, and get the situations rolling because seriously, the suspense is annoying. I'd like to find out if there really is a spell or if I'm going to die. I clear my the thickness in my throat and took in a breath.
"Excuse me, Miss Esmé," I interrupted. The orchestra came to a halt. "Really, thanks so much for thinking of me. I really do appreciate it. But I'll eat when I get home, honest. My aunt's bringing a bowl of Bear Claw soup from a friend's supper this evening. I hear it's good and I don't want to miss out. And truthfully, I'd like to get this situation over with." I said a bit winded. And they were nice not to interrupt as I babbled. I'm sure my southern draw has no vibe to it like theirs, although, Charlie Daniels playing the fiddle in the background would be 'sweet'.
"You heard her. Let's do this already." Emmett bellowed above us, through the ear-splitting silence down here.
Now I really like this vampire dude. Just hope he doesn't suck my blood. That would truly, suck.
Edward nods. But Carlisle speaks. "Very well, Sammie. If Emmett is overtaken by your scent, Alice will take you to safety. I'm telling you so you're not confused when or if things get out of control. And Esmé will be right behind you and Alice." He said firmly. I nod my reply.
It isn't until he turns away to face the stairs that I swallow the fear down and hope like heaven, it doesn't come up.
The Cullens didn't have to tell me Emmett is on his way. You didn't have to see the tension in everyone's body langue to know it was there. It is felt through and through as if it is in the air and visible.
Emmett appeared at the top of the stairs. The last time I saw him, his eyes were coal-black, his face was affixed in a deranged expression and all the while snarling at me.
Breathe, swallow fear, and keep heart steady.
But now, I consider that he resembles a very tall, brawny Greek God or the Green Giant. Or maybe it was just the impression of being at the top of a massive curving staircase as tall and masculine as he was. So far he has the mixture of two expressions; amused and mischievous. Then our eyes meet.
Breathe, swallow fear, and keep heart steady.
Emmett holds my gaze in his as he begins to descend, but halts after a few. Did he just jut his neck and smell the air? He resumes his descend and continues to hold my gaze until he gets at the bottom of the staircase. He looks at Carlisle, scrunching his nose.
"She really stinks. Bad." He said bluntly, crossing his arms.
I grin widely at Emmett. I knew I didn't actually stink to a human, but from a vampire's super sense of smell, it's the best news I've heard in a very, very long time. And it answers my suspiciousness about the spell. Could I be right about the others?
"Sammie," Carlisle stands in my line of sight to Emmett and put his hands on my shoulders. "How did you know? Is it in those books?" My grin falters. I sigh deeply and slightly shake my head no, maintaining eye contact with Carlisle. "Then may I ask how?"
Do I tell Carlisle that a Djin is out to torture and destroy me and everyone I hold dear? Could he or anyone believe me? Would he even know that this type of supernatural being exist in this world? Did I not just prove the unconventional?
The sound of a cymbal rings in my left ear. Instantaneously, I clutch at both ears as it vibrates loudly in my ear canal. Reacting to the violent clang, I bend over sharply, and hitting my head on Carlisle's chest. If he was human, it would have been comfort; instead it felt like I slammed my forehead on a brick wall. My eyes water from the agonizing pain. And then as the sound softness, a odiously laugh reverberates in my eardrums.
Oh you've got to be freaking kidding me!
~ o ~ O ~ C~ O ~ o ~
1) "I Dream of Kimmie" is actually "Jeannie." and the description is same for that real show. No copy right infringement intended.
2) "Never Think" is Robert Pattinsons song released in Twilight 2008 soundtrack. No copy right infringement intended.
3) Robert Pattinson; a Hollywood actor & great musician. He stars as 'Edward Cullen" in the Twilight movie series.
4) Lorezapam; Adivan is a real tranquilizer. Used specifically for anxiety etc. Highly addictive. What Sammie did was really bad in character & I do not promote such abuse in medication nor do I in taking other peoples medication. This releases me in future liabilities.
5) I also do not promote in not eating right. Three meals a day is healthy.
6) The spell that Sammie suspected has been proven. Regards to what happen in the classroom, the spell sparked in which made Sammie's blood appealing to Emmett. Why Emmett? Keep reading glitch fans, keep reading.
'Breaking Dawn Pt. 2" was so Awesome! Hope everyone has had a chance to see the movie. It rocks!