dove in love: I'm glad you like bitchy Casey. I was so hesitant to write her that way at first.

darknightcat: haha I know. I don't think many people would be strong enough to survive what Casey will have to endure.

Alex's POV

"I know I shouldn't be telling you this because of the whole sacredness of sororities, but Allegra told me that Alejandra kissed Casey after the pledge ceremony last night," my sister tells me while her, Bridget, and I are getting ready in my dorm.

I can feel my heart sink. "Her and Casey kissed each other?"

"She kissed Casey," my sister corrects. "Allegra saw the whole thing and said that Casey stepped back, called her a slut, and said that she'd never cheat on you."

Bridget looks nervous. "Holy shit! Alejandra already hates Casey for some reason and for Casey to call her a slut, that's just major. Casey's really in for it now."

Megan looks confused, "If Alejandra hates Casey so much, why did she try to kiss her?"

"It's just who she is," I answer.

"She wants Alex and Casey to break up. She's wanted that since they became a couple." Bridget tells my sister. "But I don't think it's about that anymore. Alejandra never met Casey until 6 days ago at the Rush party and she told me that she still doesn't like her, but she thinks Casey would be a good lay."

I'm fuming. "That little slut! I'll kill her!"

Bridget rushes over to my side, "Alex, you're expecting. You shouldn't put yourself through such emotional distress. It's not good for you or the baby."

"I'm not keeping the baby, Bridget, remember? My appointment is today."

"Sorry," Bridget says sadly.

My sister tries to change the subject. "You have a good woman, Alex. Casey would never cheat on you."

"I don't know what's come over her lately," I tell them.

Bridget starts stroking my hair, "Lexie, you two have been through so much in such a short time. Casey's not used to any of this."

"Neither am I," I add. "Casey and I haven't been sleeping in the same bed and she's hardly even talked to me this week."

"Just give her some time," Bridget says to me.

"I really love her," I tell them while trying to choke back my tears.

"Then let her in," my sister tells me. "You need to tell Casey exactly how you're feeling and what you're going through. You can't keep shutting her out."

"I'm not going to do that to her anymore. I just wish she'd talk to me. I don't even know where she is right now."

"It's their Big Sis/Lil Sis ceremony today. I'm sure Allegra is watching out for her right now," Megan adds. "My girlfriend is a total sweetie pie like that."

Bridget starts to giggle. "Did you, Megan Cabot, just say the words 'sweetie pie'?"

"No," my sister blushes. "I said 'I'm going to kick your ass, McNamara'."

"Fair enough, fair enough." Bridget says.

I start to giggle as my sister blushes even more. I love seeing her this happy with her girlfriend, especially someone who is so perfect for her.

"What's a Big Sis/Lil Sis ceremony?" I ask as my giggle fit starts to die down.

Bridget gasps. "How do you not know? The Big Sis/Lil Sis ceremony is one of the most important parts of sorority life. There is no bond in life as sacred as the one between Big Sis and Lil Sis. The Big Sis is supposed to guide her Lil Sis through the pledge process and offer her encouragement and basically spoil her. I love my Big. I hope Casey gets to have that kind of bond too."

"She will," Megan says with a big smile. "Last night, Allegra told me that she chose Casey for her Lil Sis."

I start laughing again. "Megan, since when have you been interested in sororities?"

"Since I fell for a girl who is the president of one. I'm trying to take an interest in what she does. That's something you should try, dumbass," my sister tells me.

"I just wish she weren't pledging. I'm never going to see her anymore," I tell them.

"Join the club," Bridget says. "Caleb is Pledge Master, so he's going to be hazing the new guys for a good part of the quarter. And Allegra is president of G-Pi so she's going to be extremely busy with president stuff and she's working with the Pledge Mistress. Casey is going to be so wrapped up in pledge stuff this quarter. G-Pi doesn't go easy on their pledges. I guess the three of us are going to be Frat and Sorority widows this quarter."

I fail to see the humor in this, "What does G-Pi do to their pledges?"

"Allegra told me it's brutal," Megan laughs.

"I had to give head to like five guys when I was initiated," Bridget tells us. "It's not something I'm proud of, but you really do have to earn your letters."

"Eww!" I add. "Why would you do that?"

"For the same reason Casey is going to be doing a lot of similar things; the letters, the status, the traditions." Bridget tells me.

"Allegra told me that when she was pledging her Pledge Mistress broke her down and made her start crying in front of everyone," Megan says.

"My poor Casey," I say, almost to myself.

"It really helps to have someone on your side during the process," Bridget tells me. "Caleb really kept me sane while I was pledging. Remember, he was here like every day and he was always holding me and comforting me?" I nod.

"Casey is going to need someone to do that too," Megan tells me.

I glance at the clock and realize that my appointment is in an hour. Everything seems so final all of a sudden.

I'm in a daze until my phone displays that Casey is calling.

"Casey?"

"I'm not supposed to be on the phone right now, but I just wanted to say that I've been thinking about everything lately and I'm sorry. You do what you need to do, okay? Regardless of what decision you make, I promise I'm going to love you."

"Will you cuddle with me tonight?"

"I'd love to, sweetie. I'll see you tonight."

As soon as we hang up, I feel a knot in my stomach. Even though Casey is being supportive, I know she's still disappointed. Casey really wants this baby and I know she'd be a good wife and mother. It was wrong of me to get her hopes up and then tell her I'm going to get an abortion. Is this how Alison felt when she was thinking of terminating her pregnancy?

"I don't want to be like Alison," I blurt out.

"Alex, you're nothing like Alison," Megan tells me.

"Are you having second thoughts?" Bridget asks.

"I don't know. I just know that Alison didn't want us. She wanted an abortion and because she didn't have one, she was a horrible mother."

"Is that what this is all about?" Megan asks.

"Casey wants this baby and I'm not sure if I do and I'm afraid I'll resent it."

"Alex, once you do this, there's no turning back, you know?" Megan tells me.

"You and Casey are going to be great parents, whether it's with this baby or one you have later on. You're nothing like Alison," Bridget tells me. "You and Casey have so much love for each other and I know you both would love this baby."

"I just wish there was a do-over button in life and I can change everything about the past six weeks," I tell them.

Megan wraps her arms around me, "You're not Alison. You're Alex. Even though Alison didn't want us, Daddy did and we had a good life with him. And our lives are good again, Lex. I have Allegra and you have Casey. We're not alone anymore. There's love in our lives again. We don't have to be scared anymore. As twisted as Alison is, I'm glad she had us."

I cling tightly to my sister. "I'm not going to do it, Megan. I want to be a mom. I'm ready to have this baby and raise it with Casey. I'm going to be the mom I always wanted and dreamed of having. This baby is going to grow up without the fear that we had because of Mike and Alison. And I want Casey to be by my side throughout every milestone in this child's life."

Bridget beams, "Oh my god, you guys! We're having a baby! Megan's going to be an auntie and I'm going to be a…"

"You'll be one, too, Bridget. After all, you and I are both going to be Novaks someday."

Even Megan starts to smile. "This is so exciting, Alex!"

"I know!" I tell them. "Alison's a red head, so maybe the baby will have that gene and be a red head like Casey! That would be so cute!"

Casey and I are going to be parents, for certain this time. I can't wait to tell her about the newest addition to the Novak family.