:: | Theme twenty-one,
:: | Never Again
: Rated K :
Getting lost in the terrible, maze-like Lakebed Temple was bad enough. Having a rude, sassy imp sneering at him every minute just made things worse.
For what felt like the millionth time, Link pulled the switch in order to make the staircase change position. Just glancing down the stairs and to the door at their base made him realize that wasn't where he was supposed to go. With a frustrated sigh, he turned around and tried to find a different switch.
"Still haven't found where to go, I see?" came a bored-sounding voice from his shadow.
Link held his tongue. Multiple times he had so desperately wanted to make a sarcastic remark in reply to Midna, but he refused to. Giving her an irritated response would only fuel her fire of sarcasm, and he did not want to start an argument with her.
"Maybe you could hurry things up a bit, because really, there's nothing interesting for me to do. Being in your shadow is kind of boring, you know..." Although he couldn't see her, Link imagined her apathetically inspecting her nails. He resisted the urge to roll his eyes, and instead pulled a different switch. Again, the staircase moved... and again, it was in the wrong place.
Where do I move this stupid staircase to?! Link thought to himself with an aggravated huff.
The little imp in his shadow giggled as he circled the room, discovered that a wall was blocking his path, and had to backtrack. "Keep working at it, Mister Hero! If you're lucky, you'll find out what to do in the next ten years!"
"If you actually helped me, maybe I could figure these things out sooner," he snapped, clenching his hands into fists and taking deep breaths to calm himself. How many hours had he been in this stupid temple, stumbling around the same exact room, trying to figure out which way to position the accursed staircase?
"I already do everything for you," Midna snorted. "Use your brain for yourself already."
Usually, Link was a patient person, not one to lash out at people, even if they irritated him. But Midna... Oh, Midna, he could not stand her. He had tried to put up with her - sometimes he even thought they had started to get along - but each time she started acting just a little nicer, she would revert to her usual intolerable self, making Link's rage boil inside him. "You do everything for me? Everything? Tell me, who was the one who banished the Twilight from Hyrule, who has defeated plenty of beasts and solved countless puzzles in these ridiculous temples all just to find the pieces of the Fused Shadows you so desperately want?"
The imp snickered, leaping up from his shadow and folding her arms across her tiny chest. "And tell me - how far would you be without me?"
Link felt his cheeks blaze red with anger. "Farther than this!"
"Eee hee hee! Looks like someone's a little frustrated." She gave him an impish grin, her single fang poking from beneath her lips. "And for your information, if it wasn't for me, you'd still be rotting in a prison cell beneath Hyrule Castle, stuck in the form of a stupid beast. You'd better be grateful for my help!"
He was grateful she had freed him from that cell... And maybe she was right. Maybe he would be rotting away without her.
No. No way. If it weren't for her, he still would have figured out a way to escape... somehow. He didn't need her at all. She was more trouble than she was worth. "Yeah, thanks a lot. You're so helpful." His voice dripped with sarcasm.
"I'm glad you finally admit it," Midna said with a matter-of-fact nod, and one of her signature impish giggles. Then she dove into his shadow again - and though Link said nothing, he couldn't resist rolling his eyes.
For what felt like hours, he pulled different switches to try and get the staircase where it was supposed to go, all while Midna snorted at him and made plenty of scathing remarks about his level of intelligence. With each remark, he clenched his teeth harder and harder, trying not to say any of the rude things flitting through his mind.
Eventually Midna popped out of his shadow once more. With her hands planted on her hips, she floated only inches away from his face, her single visible sunset-colored eye narrowed. "Okay, I'm sick of seeing you stumble around like an idiot. Get a move on, lazy wolf! Pull that switch," and she pointed to it with a shadowy finger.
Link gave her a dull look. He said nothing, only obeyed her as she floated along beside him. Once he'd pulled the switch she had pointed to, the accursed staircase scraped across the stone walls as it slowly spun around the room. Once it had reached its destination, he climbed the stairs as quickly as possible, heading toward the door at the top of them. I had better be nearly finished with this stupid temple, he thought with a wide yawn, as he shoved open the door.
Beyond the door was a simple hallway, blocked completely by a huge waterwheel. It wasn't moving, either. There was simply no way to get past it.
Link's shoulders drooped. "Sweet Golden Goddesses, you've got to be kidding me."
Midna burst into uncontrollable fits of giggles. "Great job, Mister Hero! Look where you landed yourself - a dead end!"
"This is your fault! You told me to come in here!" he seethed.
"You're welcome!" she declared cheerily, staring cheekily at him with that stupid grin of hers. "Now, get back into the other room and figure out where you're really supposed to go, stupid wolf!"
"Remind me never to listen to your advice ever again," he mumbled below his breath as he turned around and headed back into the miserable, Goddess-forsaken staircase room.
A/N: What can I say, I wanted to write about Midna being a sarcastic jerk. I love the fact that she and Link hate each other near the beginning of the game. It's just amusing to me for some reason.
Also, please tell me I'm not the only one that's had trouble with that stupid staircase in Lakebed Temple...? I have played Twilight Princess from start to finish eight times just in the past year, and I still get lost in that room and don't know which switches to pull and where to change the staircase to! So irritating! xP