*sniff* Only one review for the previous chapter? I've never worked so hard and polished and edited a chapter like that before. *sniff*
The room was dark. The curtain had been pulled across the great window, making it impossible to tell if the glass had been repaired.
The first things Rachel heard upon entering were a series of high-pitched whines and weak chuckles. Bryan was awake but lying down. Seger was lying at his masters side, head and neck sprawled over Bryan's torso. With his left hand Bryan scratched around Segers' ears. With the other hand he slowly stroked up and down the wolfs' body, assuring him he was okay. Little Eli had gotten into the room somehow, or maybe he'd been hiding under one of the beds the whole time. The fluffy cub paced along the edge of the bed. Although a baby, he could tell there was something going on and wanted to know what it was.
"Hey," Rachel said softly. Elias heard her and scurried to her feet. She picked him up.
Bryan turned his head as far as he could manage. "Hey." He replied.
Seger jerked his head up and growled at her.
"Oh shut up, dog. I'm not scared of you." Rachel came over to the bed and dropped Eli. He could be present, otherwise he'd just mewl and cry but he wasn't her main focus right now. Seger laid back down but still had an annoying warning growl in his throat for a minute, even with Bryan telling him to stop.
"Everybody knows I'm not dead, right?" Bryan asked, trying to make a lighter atmosphere but found he didn't really have the energy. It had only been a few hours but he had circles under his eyes like he hadn't gotten any decent sleep in a while. He was also much paler than normal.
"Master told us you were doing okay."
"I'll live. Hey, what's wrong?"
Rachel looked at him sadly then crawled onto the bed. She laid her head on his pillow. Their heads were close and their bodies formed a bendy right angle. She chuckled weakly after she got settled.
"You're the one who just went through who-knows-what and you're asking me what's wrong?"
Bryan lifted his left hand from Seger's head to the pillow. Rachel took it and held on (as best a grip with two left hands could).
"I'm sorry I scared you."
"What do you have to be sorry for? The only thing I hate you for right now is thinking you could stare down Xehanort…or whatever it was you thought you were doing."
Bryan closed his eyes for a while. His breathing wasn't heavy or labored but he wasn't completely relaxed either.
"You guys need to know something. And I know you won't believe it."
His long pause between speaking had made Rachel wonder if he'd drifted off.
"What?" She asked anxiously.
Bryan took a long breath, not so much because what he was about to say was difficult, but his body was very tired despite his mind being sharp and alert.
"This is all my fault. Xehanort didn't do anything to me."
Rachel was quiet a moment, processing what he said. When it sank in, Bryan had been right, she couldn't believe it.
"No, we saw you both. Xehanort he…when your Keyblades were locked. It was right after that you were in pain. How could that not have been him hurting you?"
"Honestly? I had him just as confused as you guys."
"But Riku and Master could sense a piece of Xehanort's darkness within you!"
"That's not exactly what you think."
Bryan adjusted himself and took several restful breaths before continuing. Rachel wanted to know what he was talking about yet at the same time noted how even thinking back to it was causing visible stress. He looked as though he were trying to concentrate through a bad headache.
"The Darkness you sensed did belong to Xehanort. But he didn't put it there. I don't even think he realized I picked it up. I certainly wasn't trying to pick up any darkness. I didn't even know what would happen until it started happening. I had an idea back there. A crazy, really stupid idea but I just knew if I could make it work it would be the best thing for all of us."
"The more you talk the less sense you make." Rachel squeezed his hand. "What exactly were you trying to do?"
Bryan took a long breath.
"I was listening for Xehanort's Heart Song."
Once again Rachel had a hard time processing what he said.
"And I found it."
"Bu-but what good could that have possibly done?"
"The location spell would never have worked without the dusk leaves. But finding Xehanort first and bringing the fight to him was still our best option. Now I have something even better. He'll never be able to sneak up on me now. No matter where I go…if he's there too I'll be the first to know. Remember?"
"'The music in all things'." Rachel breathed, catching on to what he was talking about.
Some time ago Bryan, Sora and Kairi were exploring a hedge maze in the Hall of Gardens. It was there the Master first explained to his friends about Heart Songs and what his gift for music allowed him to hear. It was also there he explained to the Princess of Heart how he would always be able to find her now that he knew the sound of her heart. Music existed in all things; Bryan understood that better than anyone. Hearts sang and melded harmoniously with the music of their worlds. Normally human hearts he didn't know only made beautiful white noise against the rhythm of the land, sea or sky. But if he knew the song, he could pick it out from among the other sounds. All Bryan had to do was listen.
Rachel finally understood the brilliance of her brothers' plan. If Xehanort were to ever lie in wait for them anywhere, Bryan would know. A man of Xehanort's power could undoubtedly mask his Dark energy if he really felt it necessary. But no one could stop their heart from singing. It would be like trying to stop your own heart from beating. And if Xehanort hadn't figured out what Bryan had been looking for, he had no way of preparing against it. It certainly put a pleasant smile on her face to think about Xehanort trying to figure out what Bryan was trying to do, whether he succeeded and what he had found out even if it wasn't what he was looking for. It was still up for debate whether Xehanort even knew what a Heart Song was. For example, from his time in Fantasia, Master Yen Sid knew about how the energies and magic of people and places could make music, so it hadn't surprised him when Rachel and Bryan were coming into their gifts. However, being able to hear the melody of places other than Fantasia, where it abounded naturally, was something the Sorcerer had not yet seen. It made sense that music existed everywhere, only other worlds did not possess that unique magic that made it audible like Fantasia. So that Rachel and Bryan had that gift, the Sorcerer was naturally intrigued. With knowledge as vast as Yen Sid's, it should come as little surprise that it was rare yet delightful to learn something new. Yes, it was possible this was common knowledge to someone, somewhere, but the odds that Xehanort was one of those people? Did his knowledge of the heart (or what he thought he knew) also include the beauty of the eternal song of a heart? Of how that song can change? That there exist those who can hear it?
Rachel's thoughts were interrupted when Bryan jerked with a full-body shiver and shifted uncomfortably .
"What's wrong?"
He didn't answer right away. Seger's ears snapped up, sensing something was changing. The movement made Eli jump (he'd been playing with Seger's tail at the time, an action the wolf steadfastly ignored).
"I really hope it will be worth it." Bryan sounded like he was trying not to be sick. "I can't make it stop."
Rachel felt a cold chill crawl down her spine like spider legs. Those words again. Bryan's grip on her hand suddenly tightened, as did his other hand on Segers' neck. The firm grip didn't hurt the wolf, Seger was too tough for that but it did get his attention.
"Make what stop?" She whispered.
"That horrible noise. I-I could always tune it out if I wanted. Whatever it was, I could ignore it. But now-but I-I can't make it stop. It-it won't stop. It's all I can hear! That terrible awful noise!" Bryan was starting to panic. "Nothing should ever sound like that!"
"Bryan! Calm down!"
"That sound! That sound in his heart! It wasn't-it wasn't music. I can still hear it! How could anyone be so-so-!" He tried to get up but Seger wouldn't let him. "How could someone do that to Music! I don't-how could-how could anyone have such a polluted soul to pervert Music to its core! His Heart Song wasn't a song! It wasn't music. It was barely a noise! It-it was-it was…" But there were no words to describe what he heard. Awful. Terrible. Horrible. Those words kept repeating in his mind but Bryan couldn't speak them because they were simply too feeble and ambiguous to accurately describe the sounds he heard within Xehanort's heart.
To Bryan, music was everything. He listened to it. He played it. He heard it everywhere. All things had their rhythms, tempos and meters. He could hear it in all things, even as mundane as a steady footstep. He hadn't told anyone, but his gift was getting stronger. Emotions changed the music around a person. Bryan was beginning to hear happiness if he listened. That was partly why he'd eased up his defensive brother mode with Rachel and Riku. After hearing the sound of genuine joy that rang from their hearts when they were together, he knew he had nothing to worry about. The Master was even convinced with a bit of practice he could tell if someone was lying by the music their being made. If Music could be considered an Element, Bryan would most certainly be an Elemental. Maybe it was. But that was a contemplation for another time.
Now that beautiful gift felt like the most wretched curse. Knowing something as wonderful as music could be corrupted so badly saddened him greatly and bothered him terribly. It was like learning a horrible, dark secret about your childhood hero. And the reminder of just how terribly Music could be led astray continued to echo in his mind.
Rachel was bothered most by his actions and his strained words. She never could have imagined seeing her brother like this. He looked on the verge of a panic attack. Bryan had let go of her and Seger to put both hands over his ears.
"I can't make it stop!" He whimpered.
"Bryan-."
"It's in my head! Make it stop!"
Rachel quickly slipped from her spot across the pillow to right beside him, cradling his head the best she could while lying on her side. She was still worried but most of the raw emotions had been tamed from earlier. Now she could try and be useful with a clear head. Bryan wasn't like this and she needed to fix it. Bryan didn't get scared. He didn't lose control of himself. He didn't cry. If he had a problem, he worked it out himself. Not because he didn't trust or feel comfortable letting others help him, that was just how he was wired. That's just what he did. If he cried, if he broke down, no one ever saw it. That was his business. Rachel was fine with that. No one was going to make him change that. Still… she gave herself until the count of five to be scared.
"What do you need me to do? Just tell me what you need." Because she needed him to be better. It was all a big sister could do to be strong when her little brother was at his weakest.
"I can't listen to it anymore!"
"What do you need?" Rachel repeated. No wonder Master Yen Sid took so long and his magic to keep Bryan calm and at ease didn't last long. Turns out, Bryan's first words were to his sister. Whether by choice or ability, he hadn't told his master anything.
"I need to stop hearing it! It's in my head and I can't make it stop!" Bryan was teetering dangerously on the edge of desperate tears. "I can't focus on anything else! I can't make myself ignore it!"
"What do you need me to do?" She couldn't let him get to the point of tears. Bryan didn't cry. He just didn't. She couldn't see that. Not now.
"Sing! Play a music box! Find a record player! Anything that makes music that's good!"
Seger was whining again. There was so little he could do to help his master and it saddened him. But it was the wolf who gave Rachel the perfect idea of how to best help. Or at least…his namesake did.
And so she sang. Even though she hadn't heard it in a long time, there was no way she could have forgotten the words. Rachel took a deep inhale and pursed her lips like she were to whistle; but the sound was not a whistle. Lightly the shrill, sassy cry of the saxophone cackled out the intro note to his favorite song. It was the song that was worn out of all his grandfather's old records from repeated playings. It was the song that made him fall in love with the classic rock genre. It was the song that beget his desire to play music as a child. And maybe, just maybe, it was the song that quickened his ability to hear the music in all things.
"On a long and lonesome highway, east of Omaha, you can listen to the engine moanin' out its one-note song. You can think about the woman, or the girl you knew the night before.
But your thoughts will soon be wanderin', the way they always do. When you're riding sixteen hours and there's nothing much to do. And you don't feel much like ridin', you just wish the trip was through.
Say here I am…on the road again. There I am…up on the stage. Here I go…playin' star again. There I go,
Turn The Page."
