- My only friend -

He raise the gun and aim it at her. As she gets down on her knees, he pushes the gun at her forehead, afraid anger would get the better of him before getting his answers. He tells himself that he should have known it was her. He trembles from conflicting emotions. She says nothing. 'Beg for your life' he tells her. No, he pleads. Please, beg me for your life. Please convince me! She didn't say anything, just looks up at him. She cries while studying his face. He begs her, please say something. Anything! He gets angry. She just stares at him. Eventually she answers him. She does not regret what she did. He gets angry. He deservs to hear her reasons.

"Kolyat.."

His eyes spoke of one thing and one thing only. Determination.

"I couldn't have known! I wanted to be close to someone. He was there for me! I regret my involvement but if I hadn't.."

Tears threatened to choke her completely. She fought through it. Wheather or not she was going to die there, he deserved to hear the truth.

"If I hadn't.. That AI was the world to me, my one and only friend. If I hadn't, I would never have become the person I am today, I would never have met Keiji.. I would never have met you.."

His whole being was shaking. Kasumi could see the conflicting emotions dance across his face. He tried his best to hold on to his hatred.

"Kolyat.. I had noone growing up. Noone but your father. I looked up to him, he was kind to me. I wanted to be around always. I wanted his serenity, his strength.. but he was never really around for longer than a few days at a time. That AI.. it was like he was around all the time, like he was my best friend.. I didn't know, Kolyat! I had no idea they were watching me. I.. I never coded your name into the AI because I was jealous of you. I wanted to be you so bad, to be Thanes kid, that I pretended you didn't exsist. In my AI you didn't exsist.."

Tears broke their way through. She looked down at the floor. She knew how much that AI had meant to her, how important it had been for her since it to resemble Thane so much. She was ashamed to admit it but even if she had known what that resemblance would result it, she would still have coded it, simply because it was her sole point of companionship. Her only friend until she met Keiji. Kolyat let the weight of the gun take him over. His arm fell to his side and he slowly sat down on his knees.

"And that's probably why I'm still alive.. they never knew I exsited.. They never bothered to look for me"

"Kolyat.. I am so sorry.."

She crawled closer to him.

"Father told me he had killed all of them. All who had anything to do with my mothers death. All but one. When I asked him why he spared one and who it was, he only told me that some wrongs are made for the right reasons and cannot be judged the same way. He told me to let it go.."

He paused, trying to find the words.

"I swore I would find and kill the last one. Almost like that guilty person was left for me, like it was my chance for closure.. I didn't know it was you.."

She reached her hands out to touch his. He was shaking. She felt truly scared for the first time. Not to die but to loose her friend. Her intentions at first may only have been out of selfish reassurance, to try and erase her own sins, she realised. She had taken him for granted, strung him along, ignoring or pushing away any genuine feelings he had towards her. His need to connect, to tell her, to show her. She had ignored it all, so focused on her goal to reach out to Thane. He had mentioned a life changing assignment and this must have been it. She didn't listen. For the first time, she saw Kolyat. This damaged boy, desperatly reaching out for something real, thinking he had found it. Only for her to crush him all over again. She felt fear for the first time. Of loosing something she didn't realised she had.

"I'm so sorry.. please, forgive me, I should have told you.."

Suddenly he stiffened. Anger washed away all feelings of confusion and he stood back up.

"You let me believe I had a friend in you. I trusted you! You're the reason my mother died and you just let that slip you mind while befriending me? You know how I feel about you! No, how I FELT about you and still you kept this whole thing a secret? How could you betray me so?"

Kasumi felt ashamed. Not one day had passed without her feeling like she should tell him, like she owed him atleast that.

"I.. I wanted to.. I somehow felt that if I was simply there.. that I could somehow make it up to you if I was just there for you.."

Kolyat refused to let go of his anger. He looked down at the gun. The cold white metal weapon looked so misplaced there on the floor between them. Kasumi made no attempt in taking it. Neither did Kolyat. He looked at her with despar in his eyes, tears surfacing.

"I trusted you.."

He turned around and left the room. A mixture of panic and relief gripped Kasumi by the troat and she started breathing heavily, as if she couldn't catch her breath at all. He knew. He had found out about her involvment. He could have killed her but he didn't. He would have had the right to. Kasumi would even have let him. She could easily have dodge the bullet, even at that range but she would have let him kill her. If that would have offered him closure, she would gladly have granted it to him.

She sat like that for a while to let her body catch up with her mind. The sudden need to let someone wrap their arms around her overwhelmed her. She stood up on shaky legs, afraid to let her mind wander to long lost love and friends, afraid of what those emotions would bring. She could not handle them right now.

She made her way to the Normandy, cloaked. Noone took notice of her boarding and entering her quarters. The crew had grown use to her sneaking about and hardly reacted to any sudden feelings of eyes in their necks. It was both a relief and annoyance for Kasumi. She loved to tease and scare people in the crew but they had all slowly gotten so comfortable with it, she had to keep changing her games to keep them entertaining. However, this time it was a blessing. She closed the door behind her and sat down on the sofa. As she uncloaked, she didn't hold the emotions back anymore. She crawled into a featus like position on the sofa, laying down, hugging her own knees. She let the tears roll down her cheek and pools on the cushions of the sofa. This had all been such a bad idea. Ever since Keijis passing she had been so lost. She had noone she could trust the way she had Keiji. And noone could trust her. For all her skills, handling people was simply not one of them.

The knock on her door quickly woke her from her fog of emotions. She wiped her tears and made sure her hood covered her red, swollen eyes.

"Who is it?"

She tried to sound her usual happy self and knew she failed.

"It's me"

Thane. Why, of all people? Kasumi did not exactly feel like talking to him right now, or at all, but he insistently knocked on the door again. She knew she wouldn't get ridd of him that easily. She didn't have the strength to fend him off. Maybe she should just follow Shepards advice and talk to him. She had already ruined a relationship today, might as well keep that winning streak of good choices going. She stood up and walked to the door, sighed, put on a fake smile and opened.

"Thane! What can I do you for?"

She tried her best to keep her face hidden. Thane didn't say much. He walked passed her into the room, despite her attempts to stand in his way. He closed the door and turned to her.

"Kolyat knows, doesn't he?"

He was never one to ease into a topic but it still surprised Kasumi. She was sure he was there to talk about something completely different. She hassitated a while before answering.

"Yes.. he does.. he.. almost killed me for it.."

"I told him to let it go.. Kasumi, I'm sorry. I really thought I could make him understand. He's a passionat boy.. man, I mean. Emotional. I can't always seem to see the logic in his reasoning.. I swear, I will talk with him and make him understand. I know you two are good friends and it would please me to see that continue"

Kasumi just stood there, surprised, feeling vulnerable. Thane watched her for a while, almost like he was trying to figure out what to say to make it better. He walked up to her and grabbed her by her shoulders.

"Kasumi. Please, understand that I have forgiven you a long time ago. There is no bad blood between you and I. I don't know why you've avoided me, I only wanted to tell you thus; I forgave you a long time ago. I only needed to know if you could forgive me for leaving you behind like I did"

Kasumi looked up at Thane. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. He wasn't angry with her. He wanted her forgivness. She had been such a fool, scared to confront him. Scared to be confronted.

"You forgive me?"

"Yes. At the time, I was angry, I admit"

He let go of her shoulders and started to pace across the room with his hands behind his back.

"Let me explain. I left and hunted down the last of the slavers with that same anger I had felt for what you had done. I had no intention of coming back. No intentions of ever.. seeing you again. I only wanted my son. But when I returned to him, he was a man already.. Unknown to my eye, to my memory. I had taken too long.. I had nothing to offer him, so I left. Again."

He paused, looked at her with regret in his eyes.

"Shepard made me realise it's important to keep family close. She helped me find him, to get him back in my life. In a way, you were family too, I just didn't see it back then. That evening, when I heared the sound of your cloak.. when I realised it was you.. I was not sure what to feel. I got angry, yes but not at you. At myself. For that I never seeked you out, for you to find it necessary to lie, to hide yourself in such a way.."

He walked up to her and looked down into her eyes. He pulled her hoody back. All the emotions gripped her again and she couldn't fight the tears as they started making their way down her cheeks. He wiped away a tear with his thumb as he put his hand on her cheek.

"Carrin, I ask your forgivness"

It was all she could do but cry and nod. Thane looked surprised but to Kasumis relief he did not comment. He only wraped his arms around her and let her cry. He gestured to the sofa and as they sat down, he let her crawl up close to him, holding her like a child. After a while she felt the emotions drain and sleep slowly took her. She hadn't slept for two days running. These last few days had been so intense and emotional, she had completely forgotten about sleep. Thane sat still, stroking her arm and she let herself fall asleep like that. She felt at home. The smell of Thanes leather armor reminded her of simpler times. She fell asleep and dreamed of bright red fruits and old books of hidden treasures. Thane carefully stood up and watched her sleep for a while. He smiled, feeling glad he had finally managed to start mending a part of his broken past even if the timing was unfortunate. He found himself feeling somewhat proud of Kasumi. For every bad thing he had done, he had always thought he had only added one good. Maybe, he almost dared hope, had he been part of creating the path for another good thing and he was determined to be there for her. His time may be limited but he would hold on long enough to ensure her the strength she needed.