Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Thanks and credit to Stephenie Meyer her creativity and storytelling!

A/N: Thank you for all for the story alerts and for making this story a favorite. Most of all, thanks for your feedback. Your participation makes this a better story and I am inspired by it. If you're interested, check out my other stories "The Transformation of Emmett McCarty" about Emmett's change, and "Family Ties" which is a collection of Cullen family moments with Bella. Links are on my profile page. Happy New Year!

JPOV

Something was happening to Bella. As soon as we arrived at the house, Emmett was eager for the arm wrestling match, but seeing Bella's demeanor made him back off. She was unusually quiet, not making eye contact with anyone, as Esme gave us a tour of the property. Even Alice stayed in the background, although I could feel her impatience. All of us exchanged glances, noticing that Bella was preoccupied with her thoughts. When Esme showed us our bedroom, the family left us alone.

It concerned me that Bella was unreadable. I couldn't feel anything coming from her and wondered if she was using her shield. We discussed her gift a handful of times over the last several months, but never really explored it. Now I wished I understood it better.

"Darlin', are you okay? I can't feel you," I asked softly, sitting down on the bed and pulling her into my lap. She laid her head against my chest and sighed.

"I don't feel very well," she responded blankly.

I was alarmed. Vampires rarely felt sick, unless they went without blood for a long period of time, and I knew Bella was well fed. "I'll fetch Carlisle," I said, standing up and setting her back on the chair.

"No, don't leave," Bella pleaded. "Let's just sit here for awhile." She held out her arms to me.

I nodded and returned to our previous position, sending her waves of comfort, although they kept bouncing back to me. After a few minutes, however, I began to feel her again and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"There we go, Bella's back," I murmured, smoothing her hair. She was feeling heartbroken and afraid. It wasn't intense, but it was there, pulling at Bella. I sent her my love and she smiled, but didn't open her eyes.

"Jasper, no matter what happens, don't leave me," Bella pleaded.

I kissed her head. "Darlin', I will never leave you."

"Good," she murmured, satisfied.

It was only seconds later when Alice, and the rest of the family burst into the room.

"Bella, Jasper, where are you?" Alice screamed, looking around, searching for us.

Anger pulsated through my body, "What the hell, Alice?" I yelled, still holding on to Bella.

Everyone looked at us in shock, surprised that we were in the room. Did they think we left? I immediately realized I was only reading their body language and couldn't feel their emotions.

"I couldn't see you...I can't see you..." Alice stuttered, looking confused.

"I can't feel you, either," I admitted, looking directly at Carlisle. "Is Bella shielding us?"

Bella hadn't responded at all to the commotion, but was as still as a statue in my arms.

"There's one way to find out," Carlisle said. "When the Quielete's tried to attack Bella, they physically bounced back."

Emmett nodded in understanding. "I'll do it," he offered, and immediately began walking towards us.

When he was only a few feet away, there was a flash of electricity in the air and Emmett flew back, crashing through the bedroom wall. Rosalie rushed to Emmett's side to help him up.

"Damn, that hurt," Emmett muttered, shaking his head. "I'm not volunteering to do that again...Sorry about the wall, Esme," he added with a grin.

Esme gave Emmett a side hug. "I'm glad you're alright," she assured him, dismissing the damage to the wall. "What was that?"

Carlisle looked impressed and very pleased. "It's Bella's shield. It's her gift and it explains why Alice couldn't see her and Jasper, and why no one can approach them. She must feel overwhelmed and is protecting herself...and her mate."

A thrill rushed through me when Carlisle referred to me as Bella's mate.

"We need to give them privacy and let Bella become more comfortable with us. She needs to acclimate slowly," Carlisle advised.

Everyone nodded in agreement and filed out of the room. Alice was the last one to leave and smiled at me with compassion. "I need to talk to Bella, Jazz. Soon," she mouthed and I nodded, acknowledging her words, but not giving my permission.

It wasn't that I didn't trust Alice, because I did, but I knew that often what she thought was urgent wasn't necessarily a matter of life or death. She was wanted things to happen as soon as she had a vision about them. Alice needed to be patient.

I continued to hold Bella in my arms, whispering words of my love for her, my thoughts filled with what to do next. Maybe the family should have visited us in Alaska first, I thought. It was a familiar and a safe place for Bella. All of us together was overwhelming her for some reason, although she had given no indication she was unhappy or uncomfortable until we arrived at the house. But, maybe she was shielding herself and I hadn't noticed? Her shield seemed to have varying degrees. She could protect herself, protect others...it was fascinating and very powerful.

"Are you thirsty?" I asked, looking for an excuse to leave the house. "We can get out of here for awhile, if you want."

"No," Bella replied. "I'm alright, probably just some newborn freak out." She looked up at me and smiled, but oozed embarrassment.

I kissed her forehead, sending her reassurance and confidence. I didn't know if talking about this episode would help, since Bella herself didn't seem to understand why she was out of sorts.

"Do you feel well enough to go downstairs?" I asked.

She nodded and stood up. I pulled her back into my lap and kissed her fervently.

Every kiss with Bella shared the same intensity of a first kiss. I felt vulnerable and confident and when our lips touched, it was a sacred moment. No one else mattered, everything faded away and it was just the two of us.

I had observed mated vampires and logically understood what it meant to be mated, but experiencing it personally was an entirely different thing. Every moment with Bella was the happiest moment of my existence. I was completely at peace when she was with me. Physically, I didn't know it was possible to feel so satisfied when we made love. Bella instinctively knew how to please me and I seemed to know exactly how to please her, too. And while I was committed to and loved the Cullen family, if Bella asked me to leave and never see them again, I would do it without a second thought. She alone had my undying loyalty. I would be at her beck and call for the rest of eternity.

Although we hadn't had private conversations about the shocking revelation that Bella was my mate, Carlisle and Esme and Emmett and Rosalie seemed to have fully accepted us as a couple. I hadn't detected any unusual or ill feelings, and when I had been affectionate with Bella, they were happy for us. Only Esme had shown worry and I knew it was because she was thinking of Edward and his reaction, not because she disapproved. But, it made sense we were so readily accepted. Now that I had a mate, I realized there was a mutual understanding with others who had also mated. Carlisle and Emmett felt the same way about Esme and Rosalie as I did for Bella. And I'm sure once Alice reassured them that she was supportive of the relationship, that had helped as well.

"Did you know that when the burning stopped, you were the first person that came to my mind?" Bella mentioned after our kiss.

This bit of information filled me with joy. "Really? You never told me that before."

"I just thought of it, actually. Strange," she shrugged and pulled me off the bed. "I believe Emmett is ready for a little competition," she added with a smile, apparently fully recovered.

A shout of excitement was heard coming from downstairs, Emmett's response from his enhanced hearing picking up our conversation and the news he would finally get to arm wrestle Bella.

"Kick his butt," I encouraged, with a wink.

BPOV

I didn't know what happened to me and I'm glad Jasper didn't make me talk about it. I wanted to blame it on being a newborn, and that's the excuse I gave Jasper, but I knew it was more than that. I felt a sense of impending doom, a sense of a coming confrontation that could not be avoided. After Jasper told me he couldn't feel me, I even blacked out for a moment. It terrified me.

But, Jasper was my source of strength. After being alone with him for awhile, I recovered. Whatever was going to happen, I needed Jasper to be by my side, and that's why I begged him to never leave me. I felt secure and confident in his love, and it would give me the power I needed to face whatever was coming my way.

Despite the unexpected episode, it was so good to be with the family again. Being surrounded by the Cullens made me feel like I was home. When I came downstairs, almost everyone but Emmett ignored me and Jasper. I figured they were trying to make me feel comfortable, but it was unnecessary.

"Would anyone like to watch me humiliate Emmett?" I joked.

Immediately the others were attentive and followed us outside to the designated area. For the next several hours everyone watched me and Emmett compete, cheering and clapping for us. It began with basic arm wrestling, then running, weight lifting, but as I continued to win, Emmett began to think of more specific challenges. Eventually, he won in a game of control – something to do with bouncing a ball while climbing a tree. Jasper refused to let me wrestle Emmett, so he volunteered himself, and even Carlisle went a few rounds.

I felt like I had never laughed so much. The games and quality time together was the perfect way to be reintroduced to the family. I suspected Emmett intentionally planned it this way and I made a mental note to thank him for it later. Testing my skills and exercising them also reinforced my general feeling that I was always intended to be a vampire. It felt natural and right and I was so thankful I had been given a second chance, even if it didn't happen how I originally planned.

As I reflected on this, a flash of a human experience came to my memory. It was vibrant and clear. I was at the prom, with Edward, and the others were there, too. We were dancing and I was happy. Flash forward, to Edward and I alone, and I was asking him to change me into a vampire. He refused.

I suddenly lost my balance, but quickly recovered. I looked around to see if anyone had noticed, and they hadn't, except for Jasper, of course. He looked at me with surprise and concern, and I smiled and shook my head dismissively. The look in his eyes told me that he would make me talk about this later.

Dawn arrived and Carlisle, Esme and Alice informed us they were going into town to finish Christmas shopping. Since I didn't want to be tempted with humans, Jasper and I stayed behind, along with Rosalie and Emmett. However, once the others left, Rosalie and Emmett quickly made an excuse and disappeared, too.

"They wanted some alone time," Jasper explained, sending a wave of lust my way, probably what he had observed from Emmett and Rosalie, with a mixture of his own.

"Ooooh," I replied with a grin, my eyes widening.

Jasper pounced, pinning me down on the sofa, the weight of his body heavy on mine. I sighed.

"This is nice," I cooed, feeling relaxed.

"We have to make the most of this opportunity," Jasper informed, kissing my neck. "Everyone is so happy when we're all together, I expect we won't have very many more times alone."

"Is it silly to say that I've missed us?" I asked. Although we had never left each other's sight since we arrived, I missed being completely alone with him.

"No, I feel the same way," he replied, unbuttoning my shirt so that his mouth could explore my chest.

I moaned as he kissed my breasts. "Could we move this to a more private place?" I whispered.

We were on a sofa in the living room, which had a very open and exposed floor plan. I didn't want to shock sweet Esme by allowing her to walk in on us making love or face the awkwardness of being caught by Alice. Surprisingly, Alice hadn't pursued the one on one conversation that she seemed to desperately want. During the competitions with Emmett, she was my loudest cheerleader, and didn't seem so impatient to talk. She was enjoying herself like the rest of us.

"Your wish is my command," Jasper responded, gracefully placing me on his back and running out the door.

As we were running, I had another flash of human memory. I was on Edward's back and we were running through a forest. He was laughing and so was I. When we stopped, he carefully set me on the ground and then he kissed me.

I opened my eyes and Jasper was kissing me. I screamed.

JPOV

Bella had never screamed at me before, and I took two steps back in shock. I was hurt.

I rarely guarded my emotions around Bella, it was my natural instinct to be transparent with her, and she felt my hurt. Her eyes widened in horror and she threw her arms around me.

"I'm so sorry! It's not you! It's not you!" she exclaimed.

I hugged her. "What happened, Bella?"

She sighed and looked over at a bench. We were in a small shack, on a section of the hundred year old property that Esme hadn't yet restored. I spotted it when Esme gave us a tour, making a note it would be a perfect place for alone time with Bella, far enough away from vampire ears in the main house.

"Let's sit down," she suggested. "We need to talk."

Bella held my hand and led me to the bench, where we sat facing one another.

"This is not easy for me to talk about," she warned. "And I know it's not easy for you, either."

Edward. This had to be about Edward. I nodded.

"Remember earlier when I lost my balance? Well, I had a very clear human memory. It was about Edward."

I wanted to growl, although I had no reason to feel defensive or angry. Bella was watching to see how I would respond, and I smiled.

"Go on," I encouraged.

"I was asking him to change me, but he refused. And just now, as we were carrying me while running, I had a memory of Edward and I doing the same thing. Then, when you were kissing me, I was remembering when Edward kissed me."

It was too much, the image of Edward kissing my mate, even though she had been human at the time and I was unaware of my attachment to her. I stood up, jealousy pouring off me, my fists clenched.

"I'm sorry," she replied miserably. "I didn't want to remember it, it just happened."

I knew I was being selfish and sat back down to hold Bella's hands.

"I'm sorry, Bella," I apologized, squeezing her hands gently. "Your human memories seem to be returning. Maybe it's because you're with the family again?"

At this realization, I wanted to take Bella away from the family. Her human memories were filled with Edward, and I didn't want her to be reminded of him. Not just for jealousy's sake, but because I knew the damage he had done to her. It wasn't too long ago that Bella came to me a mess of emotions. I remembered the intense heartache and loneliness she felt when she confessed Edward told her he didn't want her. I didn't want Bella to have to face that pain again. Protecting Bella was my duty.

She shrugged. "Maybe."

"We should leave," I suggested. "You're still a newborn and this trip was pre-mature. I shouldn't have allowed you to be overwhelmed like this..."

Bella shook her head in protest. "I'm happy to be with the family. It's not their fault. I want to stay."

I sighed. Leaving would be easy, but perhaps this would have inevitably happened, no matter what length of time we stayed away.

"Okay, then we need to talk about Edward."

She cringed. If her memories of Edward were resurfacing, then he was unavoidable.

"We can't ignore him forever. For my peace of mind and for yours, and for the future of the family, we have to resolve our issues."

"And those issues are...?" Bella asked, wanting clarification.

"Well, to put it very simply, Edward did you wrong. He needs to acknowledge the pain he caused you and how his selfishness affected the entire family. And, we need to tell him about us."

Bella sighed. "How am I going to deal with this?" she asked.

I cupped her face with my hands. "I'm not going to leave you, Bella," I reminded her tenderly. "We'll face this together."

Bella smiled, and though I felt her love for me, I knew she was hiding something, too. She initiated a kiss, but it was filled with sadness. This troubled me.

"Bella," I whispered between kisses. "I want you, forever. You're so good for me. You are my world."

Bella stood up and started hyperventilating, which I had never seen a vampire do before since we technically did not need to breathe to survive. She was having an emotional reaction to my words, but not in a good way. I was terrified to see Bella so upset, especially when there was nothing I could do to help her. She wasn't blocking me, but the calm I was sending her was not affecting her. She absorbed it, but it wasn't enough to settle her.

I pinned her against a wall, trying to steady her.

"Focus on me, Bella. Look into my eyes," I instructed, trying to make eye contact with her.

She obeyed and her eyes full of panic settled on mine. Within a couple of seconds, she physically relaxed.

"What's happening to me?" she asked, her eyes searched mine, as if I had an answer. I didn't.

"I wish I knew, but we'll figure it out," I encouraged with a small smile.

Bella used her newborn strength to break free from being pinned and she threw her arms around my neck, pulling me closer to her. She jumped up and wrapped her legs around my waist. It was similar to the second time we kissed, the time when she actually kissed me back. This time I didn't have to use restraint and walk away. I pressed Bella against the wall, wondering if it could withstand our weight, and decided to be careful just in case.

The pleasure from our kisses filled us both with desire, and Bella gave me a familiar look that told me she ready. Bella unbuttoned my pants and I unbuttoned hers, and after she guided me into her, she started sobbing. I paused for a second, concerned, because usually I was the one who became emotional during our love making.

"Don't stop," she pleaded, moving her hips back and forth, filling me with pleasure. She was going slowly, savoring each sensation, and I matched the rhythm of her movement.

Usually our love making was fervent and intense, but this was slow and steady, prolonging the satisfaction, taking the most out of every moment. She continued to sob as I covered her face with kisses, trying to comfort her.

Bella looked me at directly as I moved in and out of her.

"Don't leave me, Jasper," she commanded, repeating her earlier request. "No matter what happens, promise you won't leave me."

"I promise," I immediately answered with a kiss.

I didn't understand why Bella was suddenly so afraid of me abandoning her. Later I would realize it wasn't me she was afraid of...she was afraid of herself. Her intuition was preparing her for what was to come.