Chapter 21 (I don't own crap) Read and Review please thanks!
"Hey…" I clear my throat a bit seeing as how she looks completely broken at the moment.
"You wanna talk?"
"Nope." She says and turns on the radio full blast "Wanted Dead or Alive" is playing.
I'd only seen her this mad at me ironically enough. I sigh in thought remembering how she referred to Sammy as her brother I knew that had to hurt something fierce. Which only further drove me into anger it just wasn't like Sam to talk to girls that way maybe demon bitches sure but Bella Swan of all people? I look back over at her and simply take her hand hoping at least the smallest of gestures helps her.
Eventually she falls asleep in my lap and the latest events play out in my mind. I try to piece them together like a puzzle. Yet no matter how much I try to come up with a solution I can't it just gives me a god damn headache. My eyes start to bat as well and I know it's time to find another hotel. This would normally be the point where Sammy or I ring one another and meet up or set up something. But I was to god damn pissed still. I knew if I saw Sammy I'd only fucking hit him again. So I let it go figuring tomorrow we can hash things out.
I pull up to a hotel and get a room then carry her inside. I take off her shoes and jacket and tuck her in. I sigh in spite of myself and just kick back in one of the chairs at the table and watch her sleep.
"DEAN!"
"No, No… You can't take him! Please!"
I fall back in my chair and stumble around trying to gather where I am.
"Please you can't take him!"
I hurry over and see she's covered in sweat tossing around on the bed clawing at the bedspread. Tears streaming down her face as its solid red from screaming. I narrow my eyes a bit and shake her. Once she wakes she pops out of bed and dives into the corner of the room.
"Hey…" I slowly approach and kneel over.
"Dean…" She says looking to me and checking me over.
"Dean…" She says softer and gets on her knees putting her palm to my face.
"It's me angel everything's ok."
I help her up and her arms go around me and she leans into my chest.
"You ever going to tell me what these nightmares are about?"
She pulls away shaking her head.
She sighs and I cut on one of the lamps sitting next to her on the bed.
"I saw it Dean…"
"Saw what baby?"
Her bottom lip quivers.
"Just before Cas came for me I saw one last dream... It was yours Dean."
I swallow back knowing this isn't going to be good.
"What'd you see?"
"I saw you in hell."
"How do you mean?"
"I saw it Dean I saw the fucking hooks… I saw how…" She goes pale on me her hands shake.
"I keep seeing it won't go away since… I heard you screaming hell I still hear it!"
"JESUS BELLA!"
I stand up and pace the room a bit.
"That's something you should have never had to see."
"It was like a flash I saw it just before Cas sent me out. It was right after Sammy's dream."
"What was Sammy's?"
She blushes shaking her head.
"Ah, one of those…"
She half smiles but wipes her eyes and tucks her legs under her. She reaches out to me and wraps her arms around my neck.
"I'm sorry you had to see that… That's not right. God angel."
"See it? Hell Dean baby you had to go through it! You had to live it! I can't imagine I don't even want to."
Her grip goes tighter around me.
"And you don't need to. I don't want you thinking on this any longer. I want you to fucking let it go. You understand me?"
I kiss the top of her head.
"I mean it let it go. It happened and it's all over now. I'm fine. Sammy's fine. You're fine." I wink.
"Well you're always fine…"
"Jokes Dean?"
I shrug.
"Why not? I'm here aren't I? Who all can say I've been to hell and back and really mean it? I can't think of a better time for a joke baby. Hell sometimes laughing in the face of this bullshit is what keeps us going. You're a hunter now baby. That sometimes means pushing everything back and saying FUCK IT! It's the only way to keep sane through all the fucking insanity we face. So yeah, jokes why not?"
"I love you so much tiger…"
"How much?" I hint suggestively.
She shakes her head laughing softly.
"I love you too but I mean it no more ok?"
She nods but pulls me into the bed with her.
"And FYI you being fine is not a joke…"
She smiles and runs her hand along my chest.
Bellapov
I roll my eyes as I see him against the Impala his arms folded about looking over at me.
"Morning…"
I nod and keep walking to gather some ice for Dean when he wakes.
"Hold up…"
Sammy walks beside me. Something comes over me though and I stop and turn.
"If Dean had talked to me the way you did yesterday I'd have punched the living shit out of him."
Sammy sighs.
"Looks like Dean took care of that for me." I notice the shiner on his eye.
He shakes his head with a bit of a smile.
"I deserved it."
"I happen to agree."
He grabs my arm and looks me in the eyes.
"Bell hun I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. I just was in a bit of shock to see you pull something that I'd only expect out of Dean. I just…"
"Just what Sammy?"
"I just don't want to see you get hurt. I understood why you did it. I just hate seeing you of all people…"
"Me? Me of all people? What's that supposed to mean Sammy?"
He sighs shaking his head.
"I'd hate to see that sweet girl from Forks turn into one of us."
I rear back.
"What?"
He sighs again.
"You know what I mean Bell."
"Um no actually I'm afraid I don't."
"Jesus Bell I just don't want to see you lose yourself."
"Sammy this is who I am it was always buried inside me. Dean just happened to of light a match in me so to speak."
"Some match…"
"What are you trying to say Sammy? Are you saying you don't like who I've become or might become? You miss the sweet naïve girl from Forks?"
"That's not what I'm saying…"
"Then what are you saying?"
"I just… Hell I don't know Bell hun I'm trying to apologize and make amends but apparently I'm just going to keep putting my foot in my mouth."
"Now that's a trait you and your brother have in common."
He shrugs looking to the ground.
"Why did you want me to hunt with you then Sammy?"
He looks to me confused.
"Dean told me."
He sighs yet again.
"Because I knew you could handle it. That and I was tired of seeing my brother push away every good thing that comes his way. My brother will never stop hunting. Even for you Bella you must realize that if the choice was ever put out there he would fucking leave you high and dry. Sure he'd want to kill himself for doing it but he would and will always be a hunter. I for one don't want this for the rest of my life. I want to settle down one day lock up the fucking guns and have a god damn family. I don't want to die knowing this was it? And frankly I don't want that for you either but it's your life. You just need to realize what you're getting yourself into and the deeper you invest in my brother the more you could get hurt in the end."
"So you go from supporting Dean to not?"
"That's not what this is about anymore. This is about your life! About you as a person! Not about my brother not about me but you! He should love you enough to…"
"To what?" My skin crawls as I hear his voice and I see Sammy's reaction…
I stumble in my thoughts and go to the first thing I can think of.
"Dean let's go get something to eat maybe some pie?"
He eyes Sammy without even blinking.
"You know that's a good idea." He says and I drag Dean away from yet another confrontation.
Deanpov
I pop in Metallica as we head out of town. Bella's driving and I'm looking out the window.
"Because I knew you could handle it. That and I was tired of seeing my brother push away every good thing that comes his way. My brother will never stop hunting. Even for you Bella you must realize that if the choice was ever put out there he would fucking leave you high and dry. Sure he'd want to kill himself for doing it but he would and will always be a hunter. I for one don't want this for the rest of my life. I want to settle down one day lock up the fucking guns and have a god damn family. I don't want to die knowing this was it? And frankly I don't want that for you either but it's your life. You just need to realize what you're getting yourself into and the deeper you invest in my brother the more you could get hurt in the end."
"So you go from supporting Dean to not?"
"That's not what this is about anymore. This is about your life! About you as a person! Not about my brother not about me but you! He should love you enough to…"
This plays over and over in my mind as I do what I can to keep my anger in check. I was glad to see we'd finally be in Washington by tonight even though after all the bullshit I wasn't sure how things would go from here. I look to Bella with mixed emotions.
Would she stay behind when go to leave again? Hell did I honestly even want her to go with us anymore? I close my eyes already knowing the answer to that. Selfishly yes I want her to hunt by my side. Since she's joined us I can't picture doing this without her now. But after everything she might not feel the same. She might want what Sammy wants. Something I could never give her and it fucking kills me. I want to believe me. Sammy thinks I don't want those things he's fucking mistaking! I'm just logical I know what happens I've seen it. You can never let down your guard… Never… God Damn It! I close my eyes on this my nerves are completely shot. Hell maybe I should have fucking sent Sammy! My knuckles pop in thought. I felt as if I was going to have a damn anxiety attack.
"Hey baby can you pull over for a bit?"
She looks to me concerned but nods and finds a wooded rest stop. She pulls over and I force a smile. I'll be right back. I peck her on the lips and head out into the woods. I had to get out of that truck before I scream out irrationally, punched something or started a fight with her. Last thing I wanted to do was hurt this girl any further. I growl out and punch at a few trees pull at my hair a little just releasing all frustrations or at least some of them anyhow. Anything that to someone else I'd look incredibly insane but at the moment I felt like I was heading there.
I return and Bella's leaning against the truck twirling her keys about.
"Feel better tiger?"
I nod. But my eyes widen as she grins and flashes me.
"How bout now?"
I say nothing I pick her up in a fireman carry and take her out into the woods. I pen her against a tree thankful she was wearing a skirt today as I pull her panties to the side and get her prepared for me. Once I'm inside her I take her shirt off and toss it on a branch. I couldn't get over how sexy it was watching her arch her back against that tree her breast moving about with each thrust I gave.
We finally arrive but it's a bit too late to be waking Charlie so we all stay in the house we stayed in before. I'd not dropped the rent on it just yet do to certain events before I wasn't sure what I was going to do with it. Besides it was a cheap dump anyhow.
Thus awkward to say the least as the three of us sit amongst the living room. No one's really eyeing one another or talking.
"So I was thinking about getting a tongue ring…" Bella randomly says and we both look to her.
Sam rears back and his jaw drops. I smile and wiggle my brows a bit but I got what she was doing. She wanted to break the ice.
"So when do you want to get this little piece of art done?"
"Oh as soon as possible after that I wanted to get that tattoo of that girl Sammy was admiring when I got this one."
Sammy breaks into laughter finally getting what she's doing. So she did see what he pulled that day hell.
"And then on my ankle I'm getting a tat of you Dean with a set of horns and a halo only the halo is a bit crooked."
"I'm ok with that…"
She laughs but we both see the tiredness in her eyes.
"You guys take the bed I got the couch." Sammy says.
I nod towards Sammy and lead Bella into the bedroom.
"Dean…"
I sigh and turn.
"Let's just let it go. Trust me you don't want to dig into that with me bro. I'm not in the right frame of mind."
He nods but looks to Bella a certain way one that rather unnerves me. I narrow my eyes at him as she's falling asleep against me. He clears his throat and lies down on the couch. What the fuck? I shake my head on this knowing I'm just to fucking tired to deal with any of this shit.