Sakura's second visit to Kimimaro went considerably more smoothly than the first: word that she was visiting on Council business made its way to the prison before she got there and there was no argument at the gate this time to slow her down. The same shy guard as before led her to maximum security, down past the ANBU operatives in their secret nooks and the sparsely populated cells until they reached level 5, where he took his post outside the heavy steel door.

Sakura all but skipped her way through the threshold, illuminating the dark corridor and its empty cells with the brightness of her mood.

She slowed her steps as she approached Kimimaro's cell. He was facing away from her, drying his hair with a scrap of a towel. He had by all appearances just taken a shower and done some basic laundry: his shirt and pants were hanging to dry and he was wearing dark grey prison-issue boxers.

Her steps faltered as she wondered if she ought to turn around and give him some privacy. It used to be normal to see him wandering around barely dressed – but that was a long time ago now, and he was no longer her patient, so this was probably weird, right?

Weird or not, she had to agree with Councilwoman Utatane as she watched him dry off – he really was a handsome shinobi. Tall and lithe and leanly muscled all over and that butt, would it be inappropriate if she complimented him on that? Yes, obviously it would be… but what if she just told him that his posterior chain muscles looked like they were magnificently well-conditioned (and it was true) and she was proud of him and she would like to check on them, for medical reasons, all the way from the nape of his neck down his back and then a handful of very firm buttocks to complete her examination…?

He would totally let her.

Also, what the hell was wrong with her?

Sakura was mercifully able to shut her slack jaw by the time Kimimaro turned around.

His hair was down, damp, and slightly messy, and he was all shades of pale, pale skin, pale hair, pale lips, except for those eyes of green that lit right up when he saw her.

He had no right to be this pretty. No. Right.

"Hi," said Sakura breathlessly.

And then she wondered if this was how he felt, when he found her being unexpectedly beautiful – maybe this is what that was like. It made her feel speechless and stupid, altogether alien sensations for someone as articulate and intelligent as she was.

"…I have good news, I think," said Sakura, trying to concentrate, because she had a purpose for coming here, and it wasn't to stare at his chest or the broadness of his shoulders or the way his waist cut in into that lean V that disappeared into his boxers, V for Very Interesting…

Kimimaro approached and Sakura could see that he didn't really care about her news – right now, he cared that his manacles prevented him from getting his hands through the bars and reaching out to her. The cuffs clanged against the iron, loud and unyielding.

She saw his jaw clench in restrained frustration and passed her own hands through the bars to assuage him (and maybe herself).

"I didn't quite get them to agree to set you free," said Sakura. "But I think I got the next best thing."

He was preoccupied by her hands in his but he didn't quite sink into his usual Sakura-impelled reverie. "Oh?"

"The Council wants to negotiate. They have a counter-proposal. If you manage to find Sasuke, they've offered to you a limited release."

"I do not know what that means," said Kimimaro.

This close to him, Sakura could see the slow drip of water from his hair onto his bare shoulders. That was distracting. His voice was distracting. His fingers on her wrists were distracting. Everything about him was distracting. It had been four days since she'd last seen him and apparently that was enough to make her thirst for him like an infatuated idiot and she needed to get a grip.

Sakura blinked hard and refocused for the third time during this brief conversation.

"Well – basically, they'd establish some rules and have someone watching you at all times to make sure you follow them – so you don't go anywhere you're not supposed to and keep to your curfew and any other limits that they set up."

"Oh," said Kimimaro. "This is not free."

"I know," said Sakura. "But it's better than the alternative, which is staying here until I figure out something else…"

"I do not like it," said Kimimaro after a moment of silence. "But. You are right."

"Well," said Sakura, biting her lip to prevent herself from smiling, "would you like it more if it was me, who was assigned to watch you?"

He looked up. "You…?"

"Yeah."

"Can this be done?"

"It's what the Council suggested, actually. That you be placed into my custody."

"Oh," said Kimimaro. He searched her eyes for a moment. "If it is you… you need not ask. You must know my answer."

"Hey, it's been a long time since we were last forced to be each other's company. I thought maybe you'd be tired of me and my vitamins and my lectures…"

His grip on her hands tightened. "Never."

And Sakura was unable to hold back that smile.

"You are teasing me, now," said Kimimaro.

"Maybe a bit," said Sakura.

"I will do this," said Kimimaro. "I will find the Uchiha."

"Good. It'll get you out of this pit."

"It will get me lectures and vitamins."

Sakura thought that this might be a joke, only, he never really joked…

He was distracted by her hands again. A few droplets of water had dripped from his hair onto her palms where he held them before him. He erased the droplets with his thumbs and now it was Sakura who felt herself almost falling into a happy floaty trance.

"I have to tell you," said Sakura, coming back to reality with some effort, "I feel like the Council is using me to get you to do what they want."

"…Perhaps," said Kimimaro tilting his head at her. "But. It is also what I want."

This was a fair point. Sakura acknowledged it with a nod. "Well then, you have a shared purpose. This should work out."

She turned her attention to their joined hands. She pushed her fingers into the small gap between his wrists and the manacles. She could feel a sudden deadness in her fingertips where they hooked under the metal; the manacles' chakra-blocking properties began there, on the underside, where potent jutsus were engraved.

"These will be coming off soon," she said, tugging at the metal in annoyance. "You're to leave at midnight. The Hokage is assigning a full team to you, to support you on this mission. And if you find Sasuke, they'll bring you back here – back to me, and you won't be imprisoned again…"

"I will find him," said Kimimaro.

"How does it even work, this tracking thing?" asked Sakura. "How do you know where to go?"

"It is a feeling," said Kimimaro.

"A feeling? Like an instinct, or…?"

Kimimaro seemed to be searching for words to explain. "No matter how dark it is, you know where your hands are, and where your feet are."

"Yes."

"It is like that."

"Huh," said Sakura. "Those bones really are a part of you. This is so cool…"

Kimimaro drew his eyebrows together in the slightest frown. "However. It is not easy, when the pieces are so small."

"So right now, do you kind of know where he is?"

"No. I do not know where," said Kimimaro. "But I think I know the direction."

He gestured towards the eastern corner of his cell. "There. Many days away, probably."

"You amaze me," said Sakura. "Did Orochimaru know that you could do this?"

"No," said Kimimaro.

"Why not?"

"He wanted a fighter, not a tracker," said Kimimaro. "It did not come up. Perhaps I would have shown him, in later days – but then, my sickness came, and so."

"Ah."

"You know the rest of that story," said Kimimaro.

"Yes," said Sakura.

"That story would have ended years ago," said Kimimaro, his hands warm on hers. "If not for you."

"I'm so glad it didn't," said Sakura, squeezing his fingers for added sincerity.

He took a step closer and so did she, until they were as close together as they could possibly be with him in his cell. Kimimaro leaned his forehead against the bars. "The old woman was right. I am grateful. And – other things…"

Silence fell. He looked down at their hands and left that sentence hanging unfinished. And Sakura's heart beat a little faster, and she was both thankful that those bars were there, and angry at them, which was fantastically confusing.

She stared at his chest, where little droplets glimmered in the dimness and made her want to reach out and trace her fingers along that pale skin…

"I should go," said Sakura at length, when the unspoken things became too much to bear. "I'll go see about the preparations for tonight."

He nodded, once, but it was her who had to pull her hands away.

VVV

Half an hour later, Sakura knocked on the door to Tsunade's office.

"No," said Tsunade through the door.

"But it's me," said Sakura.

"You can only come in if you have good news for me," came Tsunade's voice. "I've dealt with enough bullshit today…"

"It is good news," said Sakura, coming in and perching herself on her usual chair. "He accepted."

Tsunade didn't look up from her writing. "Good. I mean, it would've surprised me if he didn't – because, you know, he loves you and all."

Sakura blinked at her.

"Yeah," said Tsunade, "I figured it would be unprofessional if I said I told you so in front of the Council. So this is me telling you I told you so."

"Okay, okay. You were right," said Sakura with a sigh.

"I'm always right," said Tsunade.

Almost always, thought Sakura.

"… Except when I'm wrong," said Tsunade.

She looked up from her writing at last and folded her hands in front of her.

"So he's going to find Sasuke for you, this Kimimaro kid."

"Yes."

"You must be happy."

"Yes, of course I am…"

"We'll pull that seal from him and see if there's any of the old Sasuke left."

"There will be," said Sakura.

"Mm. It'll take a while, but yes – he's there, somewhere, the boy you once loved."

Sakura noted Tsunade's use of the past tense, there, and was unsure if this was a deliberate thing or not. She shrugged her shoulders noncommittally, not quite daring to clarify.

"And then Sasuke is back. And then what?" asked Tsunade.

Unsure where she was going with this, Sakura gave her a careful answer: "Orochimaru doesn't get a ridiculously powerful new body. And Konoha doesn't lose the Sharingan. The Leaf stays safe."

"I'm asking about you, Sakura. Not the Leaf."

Sakura looked at the desk, knocked off-kilter again and, once again, uncertain.

"So then… what?" prompted Tsunade again. "You and Sasuke live happily ever after?"

Sakura hated being the subject of Tsunade's study like this, especially when she didn't understand her angle.

"I don't know," she said honestly. "It's been almost ten years and… and he never loved me back."

"Mm. The universe is cruel, isn't it?" said Tsunade, propping her chin on her hands and contemplating Sakura. "You wanted the love of a man with a shattered childhood, a last heir of a disappearing bloodline, a prodigy… and you got it."

Tsunade leaned back. "Only… it's the wrong man."

Sakura looked up; she hadn't thought about it in those terms before. So many nights spent dreaming about a broken boy who might one day love her and the chance to heal him – and she had that, now, Tsunade was right. Only it was Kimimaro Kaguya, not Sasuke Uchiha.

"You do know how to pick 'em," said Tsunade. "What do you do, walk around and choose the most broken ones possible?"

Sakura shook her head. "I didn't ask for this."

"Mm. No wonder you went into medicine, you'd have to have a penchant for fixing things with this kind of habit…"

"Ugh," said Sakura, dropping her face into her hands.

Tsunade regarded her quietly for a few moments.

"You going to fix Kimimaro?"

Sakura looked up. "How do you mean? I already healed him…"

Still those pensive eyes were on her. "Of course. You're right."

Tsunade turned her attention to the papers in front of her. Sakura watched her, waiting for the other shoe to drop, but Tsunade very deliberately changed the subject.

"About tonight. I just finished putting together the team," said Tsunade. "We've got a lot of people out on missions already, but it's a good squad."

"Oh?" said Sakura, leaning forwards and reading the names upside down. She could see Kakashi there, as well as Naruto, Shikamaru, Kiba, Yamato, Gai, Neji, Ino…

"I'm on medic duty, I guess?" said Sakura, not seeing herself mentioned.

"No, actually – that's going to be Ino."

"So where do you want me? Close combat specialist?"

"No – Naruto, Gai, Neji and Kiba have that amply covered," said Tsunade.

"So you want me there as general support, or…?"

Tsunade didn't answer her, instead calling for Shizune, who arrived within seconds.

"Shizune. Take this – my list for the Uchiha retrieval team. See that they're at the gate at midnight. Get them a full set of supplies; we have no idea how long they'll be gone. And keep this strictly under wraps – if Orochimaru has ears in Konoha, I don't want him knowing of this."

"Right away," said Shizune with a bow.

As Shizune trotted out with a list that very much did not include her, it finally dawned on Sakura that she wasn't going.

"Tsunade. You can't not include me."

"Can't I?" said Tsunade, turning her attention to some paperwork in front of her. "I believe I just did."

"But – but how can you send Kakashi and Naruto to get him, and not me? We're Team Seven!"

Tsunade looked up. "Because. I'm sending out a squad accompanied by Orochimaru's number one, to go and fetch his number two. There is no other mission in the world that would attract his attention as much as this one. And if he were to find out and interfere, and get his hands on you again…"

"You can't be serious…"

"I've never been more serious in my life," said Tsunade. "Kakashi and Naruto – if anything went wrong – wouldn't suffer as much as you would if you got caught. It would've been bad enough, before – but now? Now Kimimaro – the one that he did so much to keep alive, the apple of his eye, the body that would fulfill all of his hopes and dreams – has left him. For you."

Tsunade looked grim, perhaps more grim than Sakura had ever seen her. "You don't know Orochimaru like I do. You don't know his fury. The others, he'd kill – and that's a reality that they're aware of, they're shinobi, death is part of the life they've chosen. But you… you took Orochimaru's plan and shattered it into a million pieces. His most devoted nin, his pathway to ultimate power, ran off to be with you. You, he'd torture in the most vile, sick way possible, and send me the ashes, after…"

Tsunade shook her head. "You aren't going. Clear?"

And Sakura, who had been gearing up for a protracted argument, felt herself grow pale, and wisely decided to shut up. Because she hadn't quite explored the full consequences here, the full brunt of Orochimaru's wrath – but obviously, Tsunade had.

"Understood," said Sakura in a small voice.

"Good," said Tsunade. Some of the stiffness left her shoulders. "You can see them off at the gate tonight. But you sure as hell aren't going through it."

VVV

Midnight found Sakura dashing for the gate: she had been held back at the General by a difficult (and inconveniently-timed) labour that had finally resolved itself with the birth of a healthy baby.

It was a cold spring night; along the rooftops on either side of Sakura the six ANBU shadows trailing her were themselves trailed by wisps of cloudy breath as they sprinted to keep up with her.

A few blocks into her run she almost collided into Tsunade turning a corner.

"S-sorry, Tsunade," said Sakura. "I didn't realize you'd be seeing them off too…?"

She fell into step next to Tsunade, because Tsunade was far too dignified to dash anywhere.

"That's mostly why I'm here," said Tsunade. "And I want to make sure you don't convince Kakashi to let you go gallivanting off with them."

Sakura shook her head. "You know, thirteen year old me might've been that stupid. Hell, she would've followed Sasuke out all those years ago if he hadn't done her the kindness of knocking her unconscious. But – present me isn't that stupid."

"Good," said Tsunade with a dark look. "I've already buried you once. I don't intend to do it again in this lifetime."

Her words were sobering. Neither she nor Sakura spoke again as they walked down Konoha's silent streets.

Finally, the gate loomed before them, green-black against the whitewashed village wall. In the shadows at its base Sakura could make out a group of ninja geared up to head out: there were Naruto, Shikamaru, Yamato, Neji, Gai, Kiba and Ino. Sakura noticed that Kiba stood as far from Ino as was polite while Akamaru lay at his feet like an enormous furry sphynx.

To Sakura's amusement – and Ino's carefully-masked irritation – the dog's fluffy tail beat the ground wildly whenever Ino so much as glanced in Kiba's direction. Ino shot Sakura an annoyed look when she noticed her smirk.

Off to the side of this main group stood the white figure of Kimimaro flanked by two ANBU operatives. He and Kakashi were having a quiet talk – well, Kakashi was having a quiet talk while Kimimaro stared him down and gave him an occasional nod and not much else.

As she neared, Sakura could see that both men were eyeing each other guardedly. She hoped that they would be able to sort their differences (and that Kimimaro would be able to set aside his distrust of anything remotely Uchiha) for the duration of this mission.

Kimimaro's guards caught sight of Tsunade and sprang to attention, which caused the rest of the group to notice the Hokage's arrival and straighten right up – with the exception of Kimimaro, because it was not the Hokage who caught his attention, it was Sakura.

And then the whole world might as well have stopped existing, because he had eyes only for her. Sakura felt her cheeks flush. Ino was holding back a grin: now it was her turn to be amused and Sakura's turn to be annoyed.

Though most of the group watched Tsunade's approach, a few of the more perceptive among them – Yamato, Neji, and Shikamaru – appeared to notice Kimimaro's sudden fixation but did not seem to know what to make of it. Sakura reflected, as she willed her blush away, that this was good – it meant that Intel's report had not circulated beyond the Council and that this squadron's briefings on that particular aspect of Kimimaro's file had been minimal. Hopefully nonexistent. (Right now, she didn't need everyone knowing that she was the subject of a rogue nin's fierce affections, she was having enough trouble disentangling the issue herself, thank you very much.)

Tsunade's imperious tones rang out and immediately commanded everyone's attention, including any dreamy-eyed Sound fugitives in the crowd:

"I want you out of here in the next five minutes," said Tsunade, "so I'm going to keep this short. You've all been briefed on the mission and the role you're expected to play. You all know what's at stake here. You also all know the risks."

The group before her responded with silent nods.

"For some of you, this is the tenth time you're being sent out on a retrieval mission for Sasuke Uchiha. For some of you, this is the fiftieth."

Sakura caught Naruto's eye and Kakashi's lazy gaze: the three of them were among the latter category.

"For all of you, I hope that this will be the last time," said Tsunade. "Because now, we have an unexpected ally."

She turned towards Kimimaro and gestured his guards to remove his manacles. This was not an uncomplicated affair; it took two of them and a flurry of hand seals to unbind the things.

Everyone's attention was now focused on Kimimaro. Sakura gathered, based on the whispers around her, that tonight was the first time that most of the squadron had actually laid eyes on him: So that's the guy who's going to lead us to Sasuke… He tracked Sakura from two countries away… yeah, right up to her bedroom window, I heard; she had one of his bones… they say he's fought Sasuke enough that there's bits of his bones in him, he's like a damn Uchiha compass or something… who stabs an Uchiha that many times and lives?

The manacles fell to the ground with a clang. Sakura could see immediate relief in Kimimaro's body language, in the slow blink as he considered the cuffs at his feet, in the way he opened and closed his hands as his pathways thirstily sucked up his chakra again and diffused it through his system.

There were raw lines in his skin left by the unkind bite of metal and binding jutsus. Sakura found herself resisting the urge to run up to him, green chakra aglow at her fingertips, to heal away the hurt. But even as she watched, his kekkei genkai – finally at peak function, two years after his recovery – was healing the bloody rawness away.

Right, so he didn't need her anymore. Not even remotely. In a matter of seconds, his wrists were perfectly intact.

"Cool," said Naruto and Kiba together.

"…Indeed," said Tsunade, who had also watched the phenomenon with interest, to the point where she seemed to have lost her train of thought. "So – so this is Kimimaro Kaguya. You've been given a rundown of his abilities. Of chief interest to us is the fact that he can trace Sasuke in ways that none of our trackers can."

"I know that some of you have fought against him before," she continued with a look at Naruto. "And I know that, for all of you, working with a missing-nin from the Sound is going to be a – a peculiar thing. However. Keep in mind that he has been thoroughly interrogated by Intel. They've indicated that his motivations are genuine and that he can be trusted."

"Confirmed," said Ino with a serious nod. "He's clean. Without a shadow of a doubt."

All of those present knew what an 'interrogation' by Ino entailed – that she ran people's' minds through the ringer until every dark corner had been exposed, until every plot and hope and machination had been laid bare, until there were no secrets left. Shikamaru turned his face to the ground and, in the darkness, Sakura saw him wince sympathetically.

"You are therefore to treat him as a squadmate and ally," said Tsunade, "as you would any other Leaf ninja. Understood?"

There was a general ripple of acquiescence through the squadron. A half-dozen curious pairs of eyes lingered on Kimimaro, who stood stock-still and expressionless as ever.

"So," continued Tsunade. "Kakashi is your lead on this mission. If Kakashi falls, Shikamaru is your second-in-command."

Silent nods were Tsunade's only response.

"Don't fail me," said Tsunade.

Sakura looked at all of the shinobi gathered there in the night, united by this one final push to bring Sasuke back – their weapons honed, their eyes bright with determination – and her heart swelled for this little village hidden in the leaves.

It was Naruto, of course, who broke up the seriousness of the moment. He flashed Tsunade a wide fox-grin.

"Nah, we'll find him," he said, and sidled up to Kimimaro. "I got my GPS right here."

Kimimaro raised an eyebrow when he understood that it was he who was being thus referred to. Then he pinned Naruto with a supremely unimpressed stare which, typically, went unheeded by Naruto – who proceeded to ask if the twin markings on Kimimaro's forehead were on/off buttons and whether or not he could press them.

Sakura saw Kimimaro's jaw clench in restrained annoyance. She bit back a laugh, wondering how long it would be before Naruto aggravated him enough for them to have a tussle.

Kakashi appeared to be thinking along the same lines. He gestured the group to move out and, as he passed Tsunade, asked her in a low whisper if it was okay for Naruto to get killed, or if he'd get in trouble for it. (And Tsunade whispered back, no, it would be fine, it would be his fault for antagonizing the GPS.)

So the gate was pulled open and the newest – and hopefully last ever – Sasuke Uchiha retrieval squad departed. Sakura wrapped her arms around herself and watched them go, wishing that she could've been a part of it. But Tsunade's presence at her side reminded her of the dangerous what ifs that worried the Hokage and, truth be told, Sakura did not want to be returned to her in a little satchel of ashes…

"Impressive healing on that kid," said Tsunade as they watched them go.

"Yeah."

"Completely involuntary?"

"As far as I can tell," said Sakura. "I've never seen that before, though, that kind of speed. I guess Kimimaro's bloodline limit is at peak function now, probably the best it's ever been. And I…"

Sakura trailed off and fiddled with the zipper on her jacket.

"You what?"

"I don't know," said Sakura, unguarded for a moment. "It made me feel weirdly useless."

Tsunade turned to her. "Really."

"You're getting that look like you're about to give me a lecture."

"I ought to. You think you can't be useful to him unless you're healing him? You're useful to him – valuable to him – in ways far beyond that…"

"You're right," said Sakura. (Because she didn't want to explain that healing had been the basis of so much of their relationship, that having him as her patient had been a precious experience, that making him better had made them so close, and now, he didn't need her for any of that…)

"No I'm not," said Tsunade, studying her in the dark. "Not quite. But you won't tell me how I'm wrong."

"It's complicated," said Sakura.

"Yes," said Tsunade. "I'm beginning to understand that."

Silence fell between them. Through the slowly closing gate, the green-clad Leaf shinobi were fading into the trees. Then only Kimimaro was visible, a figure of white against the midnight-green forest. He paused and turned to look at Sakura once before continuing.

Tsunade muttered some threat at the retreating group under her breath, to all come back safe or else…

And Sakura watched Kimimaro disappear from sight and found that her heart ached with worry and something else, and she thought about Tsunade's words about the fickleness of the universe and how it had lined up for her exactly what she had wanted.

Yes, she had gotten her prodigy, her damaged boy, her genius, last-of-his-name, only…

Only it was Kimimaro Kaguya, not Sasuke Uchiha. And thus, somehow, she had simultaneously received just what she had wished for and its exact antipode. She had dreamed of a blood-red gaze and had gotten life-green, longed for raven hair and gotten white. She had wanted the genjutsu virtuoso and got the taijutsu master; she had wished for the seal of heaven and got the earth; she had wanted the one who was vengeful and angry and received one that was kind and gentle beyond words…

She had wished for the one who didn't love her and got the one that did.

VVV

To be continued...