Cronus sat at his computer, wishing that he had someone to talk to about all of this. He thought briefly about messaging Aranea, but he knew that she would somehow turn the whole ordeal into story time. He decided to go to his blog and figure everything out. He made a new post and started to ramble.
sometimes bein me is fuckin hard. i cant evwen figure out just wvhat im doin anymore. it feels like i need someone to fuckin talk to but the only person i can talk to is the one person that i dont wvant to tell that im a clueless fuck.
He deleted the post before he even posted it. He hated showing that he didn't know what he was doing on the internet. That just wasn't cool. His phone chimed.
anymoby ever tell you that you are one useless piece a shrimp
Cronus frowned. He had no idea who this was.
vwho the fuck is this?
im the queen bitch in this school
i still havwe no idea who you are.
im on your fuckin swim team you cod damn grease ball
oh. wvhich one are you?
M-E-ENA)(
oh yeah! you vwere that cute cat wvith the braids. i still aint ewven sure how you can swvim vwith those things.
theyre badass you fuck
wvhatevwer you say doll. nowv vwhy are you textin me?
your hot ass step sis is livin in my sweet suite
and?
and how the fuck do i get her to mackerel on my FAC-E
i feel like that might be the wveirdest pun I havwe evwer heard for makin out.
yeah that one got away from me there
vwell I guess i could tell you... if you listen to what i got to say.
bitch why you gotta be that way
because i dont have anyone wvillin to listen to my vwoes
fuck it FIN-E i shore will listen to your woes
it aint evwen wvoes so much as a bad case a blue balls and heartache.
grow a pair an tell me how to make out with serket
oh damn youre cold.
and your an idiot
bitch.
douche
...youre okay. wvanna meet up so I can tell you hovw to make out wvith her?
cod no
you shore?
yeah and dont take my fuckin puns you fishdick
i aint a fishdick you heartless bitch!
She didn't text anymore after that. He put his phone back in his pocket. That wasn't exactly the kind of interaction he'd wanted after the previous day. He wanted someone to talk to about how things were going with Kankri. He wanted to yell from the rooftops that someone loved him and that it wasn't just himself.
He looked at his left wrist and traced light scars with his light thumb. The last time he'd told anyone that he loved them they'd laughed and he'd cut himself when he got home just to feel like he was in control again. He'd never cut his wrists before then, and he'd never done it since, but it was always where he'd stare when he thought about doing it again. He didn't want to cut. The day before had been too good to ruin with something like that. He talked himself out of doing it for something to do. It always led down a bad path.
Instead he pulled out the bottle of Jaeger from his freezer and held it in his hands. He hadn't taken a drink of it since Kankri had taken his. He smiled and opened it, taking a long drink, wishing that Kankri were here instead. He'd told him that he needed space though. He was determined to give him that space. The screen of his phone stared at him longingly on the desk. He threw it in his drawer and wrote in his journal while he continued to drink. He didn't have as much as the day before, though he felt like it wouldn't be a bad idea.
He couldn't concentrate on writing. He put the journal down and climbed up into his bed with the bottle. Kankri had left his sweater there the previous day, so he'd thrown it up there. He pulled it on over his own shirt. It was a little short and it was tight on his shoulders, though it fit fairly well otherwise. Wearing it he felt like a complete and utter nerd, but when he saw it on Kankri he couldn't help but think it was the most adorable thing he'd ever seen.
He still wasn't sure if they were actually in love, but he felt like it was still more than just those first stages of like. Or maybe it was the way his favorite Pakistani had grabbed his dick they day before. He smirked as he thought about that. He'd never expected Kankri to come to his room that day, or to take control like he had again. Admittedly, he loved it when other people took control. It gave him a reason to try and get it back.
But he had to remind himself that this relationship was going to be different. He wasn't going to force this one away. Or have to pay him to do things with him, even though that's how the whole thing had started. He frowned. He didn't like that that's how they'd started out. He decided that he was going to take him out on another date, and this time he'd let him know that it was going to be a goddamn fancy place, because fuck convention. He wanted to make sure they got the best they could from this, because he already felt like it was more than what he'd had in his life. And that was strange for the boy that had everything.