Thank you to everyone reading and reviewing, I survive on these feedbacks, as it costs me a lot to write this story and update each chapter - I think this might be the most difficult chapter to write so far...

Lucie, I don't get to reply to personally, so I just want to thank you for your reviews here!

*Hides shivering under a big rock, holding my breath*

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

The film is done and the pie is gone. Blaine yawns and stretches his arms in the air. Kurt sighs contently, twisting his body to work out the knots from lying still for so long.

"I almost fell asleep," he chuckles, slightly embarrassed.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to keep you awake," Blaine says shyly.

"I'm fully capable of going to bed if I'm too tired, so don't sweat it, Blaine."

"If you're sure…" Blaine hesitates.

Kurt just glares at him, and Blaine takes a moment to appreciate how he already knows the boy well enough to decipher some of his glares. This one means Seriously, Blaine? Are you still going there, Blaine? So Blaine laughs awkwardly, and scratches the back of his head.

"Do you want to use the bathroom first?"

"Sure," Kurt accepts the offer, jumps out of the bed, and disappears to the bathroom after a detour to the drawers.

Blaine spends the waiting time finding a pair of pyjamas pants and a t-shirt to sleep in. He scrutinizes the curtain screen, wondering where to place it. He finally unfolds it, and lets it split their room in two, between their beds. It makes the space between the beds a bit narrow to navigate within, but he thinks they'll manage. It's more important that he can offer Kurt some privacy.

Kurt exits the bathroom as Blaine is finishing adjusting the screen.

"Is this OK?" he asks and points at the screen separation their beds.

Kurt merely shrugs.

"I'm fine with whatever."

Blaine nods, grabs his sleeping clothes from the bed, and heads for the bathroom.

He takes a quick shower to release his hair from all the gel he's been accustomed to using, slips into his night wear, brushes his teeth, and examines his face in the mirror. He isn't particularly fond of what he sees. His hair is constantly misbehaving, is in dire need of a trim, and is impossible to make look any good, no matter what he tries. His eyebrows just look weird. He hates how fast his stubble grows; shaving is so boring, and he likes to have a smooth face. His nose is too big. His chin is so square, and he's always wanted to look… cuter. And his facial muscles make all this weird grimaces and faces, why can't he just look normal? And this is just from his neck and up. His body is too short. He's blessed with a toned torso, and it defines easily now, he doesn't have to put in a lot of effort to get muscles after all the boxing training he's put down. But with his wide shoulders he wishes he could be taller, to look more proportional.

Blaine sighs, ruffles his hair, and leaves the bathroom.

"Good night, Kurt," he quickly whispers as he passes the boy's bed, and slumps down in his own after taking the light. It's been a long and exhausting day. A lot of tears and pain, and a lot of memories haunting him. He had tried to get some sleep before dinner, but his mind had been super busy and kept him awake. It doesn't even take a minute before he's fast asleep now, however.

Kurt had almost fallen asleep while Blaine was in the bathroom, but when the other boy had whispered the three words he had drifted back to being awake. Kurt needs a minute to clear his brain and throat, but finally gets out a "sleep tight" to Blaine. He doesn't get a reply, though, and soon after he hears a few soft snores from the other side of the curtain screen.

Kurt lies still and stares at the screen. He can't really see anything through it in the dark, but he still thinks he can point out the silhouette of Blaine's sleeping body. Kurt isn't used to sharing room with anyone. Sure, Finn and he had done so for a while, but not long enough for Kurt to get used to it. He still feels a tad too conscious about everything. He's afraid to bother his roommate. The hospital bed makes a squeaky noise every time he moves, so he hesitates to turn around or adjust how his body smelts into the mattress. He's afraid of keeping Blaine awake.

Then his mind starts pestering Kurt, wondering if he snores loudly. Or maybe he talks in his sleep? Is he a sleepwalker? Will he do some funny or weird things that'll annoy or freak Blaine out?

Kurt tries to breathe as silently as possible, but his body itches to move a bit. He finally lets his body have its way, and turns around. He inwardly groans at the sound of the squeaking sounds the bed makes. He breathes evenly, but if he holds his breath, he thinks he can hear the sound of Blaine's inhales and exhales.

Kurt keeps staring at the ceiling, thinking about nothing and everything. It's late, or maybe even early in the morning, before he finally falls asleep.

When Blaine wakes up, he discovers a downside of having to share room. He desperately needs to pee, but Kurt is already in the bathroom. Luckily, it's easy to solve, and he heads out of their room to use one of the bathrooms in the hallway.

Shortly after, Blaine is back, and he notices Kurt is already out of the bathroom.

"Where have you been?" Kurt asks confused.

"Oh, I just needed to use the toilet," Blaine shrugs.

"I'm so sorry, Blaine, I should have waited until you woke up, and asked if you wanted to go first," Kurt rambles, clearly upset.

"Hey, hey, hey, calm down," Blaine laughs friendly. "You really need to relax while we share room. We share, so you act as if you actually live here, and not like you're some polite guest, OK?"

He looks sternly at Kurt until the boy nods in affirmation.

"Good", he smiles. "By the way, I was wondering. Would you like to get out of here and grab some coffee later on? We'll have to bring one of the nurses, but I know that's not a problem for them, and there's a nice café only a couple of blocks away."

"I appreciate the offer, but I don't feel ready to leave these walls," Kurt answers, gesticulating at the room at large.

"I understand. Maybe some other time?"

Kurt nods half heartedly, and unconsciously tugs on his shirt sleeves to cover up his wrists.

Blaine finally takes his time to actually see Kurt, and his heart skips a beat at the boy's outfit. He's wearing the same jeans as yesterday, a simple black shirt, a metallic black tie and a steel grey vest who accentuates a body Blaine is learning to know he appreciates more and more.

"You look stunning," he gasps, and shakes his head to recover from his stupid. "When I saw you yesterday I just assumed you had dressed up for the holiday, but I'm starting to think you've upgraded your entire wardrobe."

"I'm awfully overdressed," Kurt whispers, wringing his hands, and Blaine realizes how uncomfortable the boy looks. He sits down on Kurt's bed, and the boy is squirming, standing on the floor in front of him.

"What's up, Kurt?"

Blaine never asks what's wrong, because God knows too much is wrong, and nobody wants to be wrong, and Blaine's decided for a long time ago to avoid that word as much as possible,

"These are my old clothes," Kurt whispers, but looking intently at Blaine.

His old clothes? So the sweats and hoodies are his new wardrobe? But why?

Blaine gives Kurt a confused look, and Kurt sighs.

"I've changed," he sighs softly, and the infamous light bulb pops up over Blaine's head. Of course. Kurt had told him he had changed a lot about him to avoid being a target. Dressing stylishly and fashionably might have singled him out, if his school is anything like the one Blaine went to.

"Oh Kurt…" Blaine sighs with sadness. It's easy to see how good these clothes fit Kurt, and how well he wears then. He can only imagine how important fashion is to this boy. It saddens Blaine that Kurt willingly dropped his wardrobe to more easily blend in with the crowd at his school.

"I told my dad I was in need of more clean clothes, but my friends came with a bag of my old stuff. I don't know why they'd do that; they have to know I've changed, but…"

"Kurt," Blaine says, getting up from the bed and standing in front of Kurt. "First of all, you look amazing, you do. Secondly, I don't believe you have changed. I think you're just trying to hide." Blaine places a finger on Kurt's lips to interrupt the boy's protests. "I understand why you hide, but it doesn't make me less sad. I hope you'll find the safety and confidence to be yourself again, because when you are, I'm convinced you rock the world!"

Kurt snorts and Blaine removes his fingers, allowing the boy to talk again.

"I miss my brother's clothes," Kurt sighs. "I stick out like a sore thumb."

Blaine pats Kurt's shoulder, and opens the wardrobe. He pulls out a pair of red jeans, a black shirt, and the box of bowties.

"Then we can both be sore thumbs," he offers, showing Kurt the clothes.

Kurt smiles so brightly it almost blends Blaine, but he still think he can see some moist gathering in Kurt's eyes.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to hit the shower."

Kurt aimlessly flickers through one of his magazines, but he already knows it by heart, and it isn't able to capture his attention. So after a while, Kurt decides to leave and give Blaine some privacy. It isn't more than about 20 minutes until breakfast anyway. He walks to the common's room, and notices a stranger sitting in the couch. It must be the newcomer, he thinks, as he looks too young to be part of the staff, although it can be hard to tell apart when everybody is wearing regular clothes. His heart is beating faster as he studies the burly young man sitting with his nose in a comic book.

"Good morning, Kurt!" Jenny chimes, making the new boy look up. He snarls when he spots Kurt, and Kurt immediately freezes at the sight of the boy's repulsed expression.

"Well, I be damned, of course a fairy like you would be placed in a nut house like this. But you know what, homo? I don't enjoy breathing the same air as fags, it makes me sick!" he spits.

Kurt can't breath, and is staring wide eyed at the boy. Thomas is preparing breakfast, Melinda is waking up the last sleepyheads, and he doesn't know where Matthew is. All Kurt knows, is that except for Jenny, he's alone in a room with a boy that looks like Karofsky's big brother, but with less brain to mouth filter.

He gets up from the couch, and he is tall, Kurt notices. Really tall, really muscular, really big, really determined, and really scary. He approaches Kurt, and Kurt isn't able to move a muscle, he can't blink, he can't talk.

"You," the hulk snarls, pointing at Kurt. "You worthless cockroach, you shouldn't be here, you should be six feet under," he hisses, pushing Kurt in his chest with a lone finger. It hurts. It stings. Tears are welling up in Kurt's eyes.

"Hey!" Jenny shouts from her position on the couch, but neither boy hears her.

"How dare you pester the air I breathe and the food I'm about to eat?" he says, head quickly nodding against the half decked breakfast table.

Jenny presses herself past the two boys who are almost blocking her way, and leaves the room.

"It's worse enough they forced me here, but I have to live in the same building as a butt boy, a fucking faggot, a freak of nature. I detest you!" he spits.

He shoves Kurt, and it's as if it snaps him out of his frozen stance. Kurt stumbles backwards, one step, two steps, then does a 180 and runs away. His feet take him to the room he's now sharing with Blaine, and he barely manages to close the door before he collapses on the floor, a muffled scream forcing itself out from his lips. Tears stream down his face, and he's sobbing loudly.

He doesn't hear the bathroom door being opened, and he doesn't hear the hurried foot steps approaching, and he tenses as another body all but drops down next to him and quickly scoops him up in a tight embrace. He doesn't say anything, just holds him close with one arm, the other hand gently rubbing his back up and down. Kurt has no control over himself, and clings to Blaine's shirt. He's pretty sure he's soaking it in tears and snot, but he isn't able to care about it.

"Hey guys, Jenny told me to come see you." Thomas' voice fills the room as he opens their door.

Blaine looks up at him, trying to communicate with his eyes how worried he is for the crying boy crunched in his lap on the floor. Thomas quickly steps up to them, and crouches down.

"Kurt, sssshh, it'll be OK, come one." He gently pries Kurt's fingers loose from the tight grip he has on Blaine's shirt, and carefully moves him away from Blaine's lap. Thomas gives Blaine a certain eye, but he doesn't need it, he understands he has to leave for breakfast; he has to get out and let Thomas deal with this. This isn't for Blaine to solve; he has no right to care. Except he does.

Blaine finds a free chair by the breakfast table, and helps himself to a much needed cup of coffee. Jenny is sitting beside him.

"How is Kurt?" she whispers, leaning closer to Blaine.

Blaine shrugs and shakes his head.

"Not too well," he whispers back, hesitantly, he doesn't want to say too much, it isn't his story to tell.

A boy Blaine hasn't seen before sits down by the table. He looks older than them, but Blaine knows that as this is a psychiatric emergency ward for youth, he can't be more than 18.

"Morning, everybody," the boy smiles. "I'm Seth, can somebody please pass the bacon?"

Blaine chuckles at the polite, but laidback attitude the new kid is radiating. He doesn't see the furious glare Jenny is giving the new kid.

Sarah joins them by the table, and goes for the empty chair next to Seth. The boy quickly jumps up and pulls out the chair for her.

"Thank you," she blushes.

He asks if she wants coffee or tea, and then pours hot water in a cup for her.

"How has your morning been?" Sarah asks Seth.

"I slept well enough, thank you," he smiles. "But this morning something dreadful happened. I stumbled upon this God awful fairy in here, but luckily the sissy got scared and ran away. Ladyboy, what a whimp," Seth snorts.

Blaine's jaw drops to his knees, and he has to look at the other people around the table to see if he really heard those words. Unfortunately, the amount of shocked expressions tells him Seth actually made that unforgettable, little speech.

Blaine frantically looks around the table once more, but Thomas is still with Kurt, and the rest of the staff is occupied with their own morning meeting.

"So, does anyone else want scrambled eggs, or do you mind if I help myself to the rest?"

"That's plain offensive!" Blaine burst out.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did you want eggs?" Seth smiles honest and polite.

"What? Are you freaking kidding with me? You hurt my friend!" Blaine seethes.

"If you recognize your friend from my description, it can't be much of a friend to have," Seth shrugs.

Blaine jumps up from his chair.

"I'm gay, and I've met a lot of jerks in my life, but you are by far one of the biggest assholes I've had the misfortune to not avoid," he yells.

"Oh sorry, did I insult your little loverboy? You sure you're gay? You could fuck a girl and not notice the difference, for goodness sake," Seth sighs calmly.

Blaine has moved around the table before Seth has finished his tirade. He yanks the boy up from his chair by the collar of his sweater.

"You have some nerve talking like that. I would recommend you shut up and keep your opinions to yourself, as they aren't really appreciated here," Blaine hisses.

"Who made you king of lunatics?" Seth grins. "You know what? I would recommend you stay away from my face, otherwise I can't be held responsible for my actions. People like you are nothing but insects, and I have to admit I was the kind of kid who enjoyed pulling the wings off of the flies."

"What's going on here?" Matthew asks as he enters the room. Neither Blaine nor Seth saw it, but Jenny had darted out as soon as their confrontation started, to get someone from the staff come help them.

Blaine immediately lets go of Seth, and Christy and Melinda enter the room. Matthew takes Blaine to the conversation room.

"What was that?" he asks in a calm voice, neither accusingly nor condescendingly.

"Seth is a homophobe, and he isn't exactly shy about it," Blaine fumes, pacing around in the room. "He kind of threatened me, and I assume he's the one who made Kurt cry his heart out earlier as well," he sighs, running his hands through and through his hair.

"What exactly did he say to you?"

Blaine gives a recap of the breakfast, including the polite and normal, well articulated behaviour the boy had shown.

"As a general rule we don't like the patients to get physical with other patients like that, but I can assure you this won't give you any trouble, Blaine. But from now on, please come to us instead. I'm sorry none of us where there during breakfast, we didn't know Thomas would need to stay that long with Kurt. This won't happen again, I can promise you that."

Blaine nods to show he understands.

"Now you go and join the morning meeting. I'll take Seth to his room and talk with him. He has an appointment with doctor Whimchester while you have your kitchen activity later on.

Blaine nods again, and they leave the conversation room together. Matthew immediately approaches Seth, and takes him out of the common's room, and Blaine sits down for the morning meeting.

Blaine tries to be silent when he enters their room, in case Kurt is sleeping. The lights are still on, but that doesn't have to mean anything. Kurt is tucked under his covers, lying on his side facing the wall. Blaine can't resist stroking a gentle hand through Kurt's hair. The boy stirs and turns slowly to face Blaine.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up."

"You didn't." His voice is hoarse and whispering, his face is red and tear stained, and his eyes are puffy and shot. Blaine lowers his hand so it's resting on Kurt's shoulder. He doesn't ask how Kurt's doing, 'cause he's obviously not doing too well.

"We're going to make cookies and lemonade in the kitchen in an hour; do you want to join us?"

Kurt shakes his head.

"Are there anything I can do for you? You know where my books are, so please help yourself if you want to." Kurt shakes his head, and then nods, at the right places. Blaine doesn't want to pry, he respects him and keeps a distance, but he wants Kurt to know he's there if he wants him to. And they are sharing a room, so he can't very well ignore him either. Something happened, because no one can look that devastated without a cause, and Blaine is pretty sure it has got to do with Seth.

"I wish I could offer to leave you alone, but I have nowhere to go. Seth, the newcomer, is sitting in the common room, and if we have to share space I'll be forced back to anger management class." Blaine easily feels how Kurt tenses under his arm when he mentions the new guy, but Kurt still manages to chuckle slightly at the end. As if he doesn't believe Blaine has had anger management therapy.

"Don't worry, it's your room," Kurt mumbles.

"No, it's our room now. Equal rights, equal opportunities," he winks. Kurt blushes, and it does funny things to Blaine's stomach.

"If you don't mind, I think I'll take a shower and freshen up."

"By all means," Blaine gets up and steps away from the bed to give the boy some room.

Kurt gathers a towel and change of clothes. His toiletries are already in the bathroom, as Blaine had insisted he unpack and settle down yesterday. Blaine had even made sure to make space for him before he moved in. He didn't want Kurt to feel he was intruding. It wasn't his fault the ward ran out of rooms, and Blaine wanted to make the best out of it.

Blaine sits down by the desk to do some math. Kurt has to pass him to get to the bathroom. A warm hand lands on Blaine's shoulder, squeezing it slightly.

"Th-thank you. Thank you for earlier," he whispers hoarsely, before slipping into the bathroom. Blaine's eyes shine and the corners of his mouth twitch upwards. He did something right! Blaine managed to help someone!

Blaine leaves Kurt to join the others in the kitchen. They are making cookies today, and Blaine makes sure to fill a big box for both him and Kurt.

Afterwards, Thomas and Matthew come into their room to have a talk with both Kurt and Blaine. It's obvious they don't like what they have to say.

"The staff has discussed the pressing issue in a meeting, and we all agree that Seth can't be here. Unfortunately, it's difficult to make it happen as soon as we'd all like to. Because of the holiday weekend, the process will be delayed. We're afraid he'll have to be here until Monday, as most wards don't want to deal with transfers during weekends. On Monday the regular staff is back, and then those in charge can do the paper work, and Seth can be out of here," Matthew explains

Kurt doesn't say anything, just sighs, and pulls the covers closer around him, sitting in his bed. Blaine wants to protest, but he knows the staff is doing all they can.

"I know this isn't ideal for any of us, and you'll have to let us know what we can do for you. Seth needs to be observed as much as possible, so it's easier for us if he's in the common's room with us. We suggest you guys hang out in here this weekend. You'll be excused from any activities, and we'll bring you your meals."

Thomas looks expectantly at both of them, waiting for a response.

"It's fine by me," Kurt shrugs.

"Can't this be solved different?" Blaine asks. "It feels like we're being punished."

"This isn't a house arrest," Thomas quickly explains. "We'll do anything we can to make this weekend easier for you. You don't have to stay in this room, we just assume you're not too eager to be in the common's room with Seth either. We'll communicate and cooperate if you have suggestions or wishes," he adds.

"I don't mind," Kurt says softly. "I could need a weekend spent sleeping and reading. Sounds about perfect, to be honest."

"At least we have each other," Blaine sighs. "We'll make this work."

After eating dinner, Blaine suggests watching a movie on his laptop. They are lying side by side on their stomachs, with the cookies Blaine made earlier.

Because of the holiday, doctor Whimchester hadn't scheduled any session with Kurt today. Thomas had asked if he wanted to see him, and offered to organize an emergency session. Kurt had declined, but tried to explain through tears and sobs what had happened and how petrified he was of the new boy. Then Thomas had tucked him in bed, and Kurt had been dozing until Blaine came back.

"You're silent," Blaine asks after a while.

"I'm watching the movie."

"Are you really?"

Kurt sighs and looks at Blaine, shaking his head.

"No, I'm not…"

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Kurt is silent for a long while, and Blaine just keeps watching the DVD, but he lowers the volume just in case.

"Seth, that's his name?"

Blaine nods, and mutes the movie completely. He then turns around to face Kurt, elbow on mattress and head resting in his hand.

"Seth is the spitting image of my biggest tormentor in school. This Neanderthal has made it his mission to make my life a living hell, so I panicked when Seth said some… unkind words. I'm the only one out in school, and the jocks…" Kurt chokes.

Blaine rests an arm on Kurt's waist, and it's as if the gentle touch calms him down a little. He tells Blaine everything. Every single detail of the bullying. From dumpster tossing to locker shoves, from slurs to slushies. He tells about Karofsky, and how Kurt had been singled out by him.

"I don't understand why, but he kept leering at me, stopping me in the hallways, and he often touched me in really disturbing ways. I kept waiting for him to hit me, but he only shoved me into lockers. I guess I should have confronted him and stood up for myself, but I never had the courage," Kurt whispers. "I didn't feel safe in school anymore. I was jumping at any sharp sound, I hid away, and dreaded every single day. I couldn't sleep at night, but I couldn't get up in the morning either. They slowly killed me, until I couldn't take it anymore. I only saw one solution, but ended here," he sighs, and shows Blaine his scarred wrists.

Kurt has been crying as his story unfolds, tears streaming down his face. At some point, Blaine pulled Kurt into his arms. He's holding him tight, trying to still some of Kurt's shaking. A hand is gently soothing and caressing him, slowly dancing up and down Kurt's back.

"Sometimes I wish I never was born. Or that I at least was straight," Kurt hiccups. "I feel so lonely…" He stares into Blaine's eyes, and notices how moist they are. Blaine clears his throat, looking for his voice.

"I know how it is," he says, and shares his story with Kurt. He tells about a Sadie Hawkins dance, he tells about the expectations to a first date, he tells about the butterflies and the fun, he tells about the hate and violence, he tells about weeks and months in a hospital, and he tells about physical therapy and long lasting pain until the doctor pronounced him fully recovered - physically.

"This is my fourth visit here, so I'm still struggling," Blaine states matter-of-factly.

"Things weren't as rough in school as it is for you, but the attack after the dance destroyed me. The police never found out who did it. It could be someone from school, or it could be some random passerby's. Neither my date nor I remember anything from the night, and of course no witnesses stepped up."

"When was this?"

"Freshman year."

"And now you are?"

"I'm a junior, but I needed a year to recover, before I transferred school and begun my sophomore year."

"So you should have been a senior now?"

Blaine nods.

"I'm graduating this summer. I can't wait to get out of here…"

"You'll make it, Kurt. You are strong, you are fighting, and you have love and support from your family and friends. You'll go far, Kurt, I can see it," Blaine smiles through tears.

"Do you… I haven't seen your…"

"You can ask me anything, Kurt," Blaine reassures, pulling Kurt a little closer to him.

"I'm thinking about your parents and friends, do you have any support outside these walls?"

"I've told you about my friends at school?"

Kurt nods, he remembers Blaine telling about how they support him, push him, and helps him.

"They're the best. I miss them and am looking forward to see them again, but I often talk with them on the phone, text them, and they e-mail me school work and notes."

Kurt smiles, they do sound amazing, although he doesn't understand why they don't visit, but he doesn't want to pry.

"My parents… When I came out to them that Thanksgiving, they needed some time to digest it. My mom came through first, telling me it didn't matter. My dad didn't talk to me for a week, but then he approached me with his new plan," Blaine rolls his eyes and wiggles his hand with jazz fingers.

"He made a plan for you?"

"My parents have always had big plans for me…" Blaine sighs, and he looks so sad. Kurt can't help himself, but gently runs a hand through Blaine's hair.

"My older brother ditched us, and ran off as soon as possible to be an actor. All the ambitions and dreams of my parents were dumped on me. They want me to excel in school, they want me to get an honourable education, they want me to land a prestigious job, and they want me to have a picture perfect family. I think they do love me, but they keep pushing me to constantly be better. I feel as if they're never satisfied, I'm never good enough."

Tears are falling down Blaine's cheeks by now.

"Dad doesn't have any big problems with me being gay, as long as I settle down married and adopt kids. But, he wants me to be gay differently."

Kurt just gasps at him.

"He's the CEO of some hot shot company with offices in several states. His new plan entails me to go to law school, and become a successful lawyer in the San Fransisco-office."

"But why do you need to be gay differently?" Kurt whispers, trying to digest everything.

"He wishes I was a stereotypically effeminate, exaggerated, secretly cross dressing for fun in weekends, flamboyant queer, infiltrating what he believes is the dominating San Fran gay community and attract new clients to the firm. Then I would be acceptable, an asset for the firm. He wants me to play a part, to improve the business."

Kurt is silent for a long while.

"That's… disturbing."

"He accepts me for most parts, and where I miss support it's because he's leaning on prejudices, stereotypes and his lack of knowledge. I don't know what to do, Kurt. I feel like some worthless pawn in his big chess game."

More tears are falling, and Kurt's heart breaks for him.

Both boys are crying, clinging to each other, holding each other tight. They cry for themselves, they cry for the other, and they cry for a world of ignorance and prejudices. They lie so close, as if everything will be better if they can elide into one strong gay man instead of two broken gay boys. They pull the other closer, arms around each other, somehow their legs are entwined and they stare at each other with so much hurt, longing, sadness, frustration, and desperation. But there's also a slice of hope: They're not alone anymore. They found someone else as well. They have each other.

They need this, they need to not be alone, and they need to be as close as possible. Hesitant lips meet, carefully greeting the other pair of lips, not wanting to intrude. No one objects, no one interrupts, and the hesitance grows to frantic needs. It's lips and tongues and teeth and mouths and wet and sloppy, sliding on tears, tasting the salt, it's hands in hair and on cheeks, it's roaming hands and clinging feet, and it's nothing like a first kiss should be, but it doesn't matter, 'cause a lot of things in their lives aren't as they should be.

Later, none of them will be able to explain how and who and why. Maybe it doesn't matter, maybe it was an unspoken agreement, maybe both took advantage of the other, maybe both needed it, or maybe their subconsciousnesses communicated the despair. But they fall asleep in each other's arms, in the middle of a kiss.