Hye! I am back with the new chapter. Anyway I would like to thank…
DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Prince of Tennis and never will.
Johanna - thank you sa suggestion although, may nagawa na akong eksena na halos katulad nyan. Kay Fuji yun sa iba kong story. Thank you still. This is the next chapter... :)
heartluv - indeed. Having friends like Kanata is really hard to find these days. Sakuno is just lucky to have Kanata around her. Tee hee hee... You'll find that soon in the future chapters. Thank you. This is the next chapter. I hope you like it. :)
Chapter 20: Naze
Chapter Summary: The rain continued to drop but she only realized on thing. It was better to leave those questions unanswered and those answers that were left unsaid.
'The Hydrangea flowers swaying over my shoulder are blurring my memories
my chest feels pain
"Because kind words won't stay and drift away instead"
Turning your back and not saying anything was how you showed your kindness
The wind is getting heavier, the rainy season is coming again
The ambiguous season is…
"Things that are important to me can't be seen, so I lose them easily"
Hey, even when you're happy you have tears, why?
Even when you're sad you smile, why?
I'll always be wondering…'
~ Naze – Junko Minagawa (RYOMA) ~
As they promised, they let her paint the next day since she did the part of the bargain. She rested the rest of the night and didn't do anything at all. The next day was their promise. Sakuno would paint and no one would disturb her.
Seeing in a good condition, her grandmother, Tomoka, Fuji who visited her that morning finally allowed her to go out. Kanata went home last night. He reminded her to come and stop by in the court when she was free. She was really thankful of the guy's effort that to leave his area and visited her to her home. She thought of giving something for him when she was done with her painting.
With the resolve, she started walking on her way to her location. The sunset valley. The people who chose the view were somehow related to her. Fuji took the picture. Kanata chose the picture.
Ryoma gave her memories within the picture.
The latter did give more than that. He gave her first kiss there. Their first sweet talk which he rarely did and some promises that weren't worth keeping anymore. Reaching the place, she shook her head rigidly as she stood on top of the hill.
Those were memories to her now. This time, she would move on and pursue her own dreams. This time, she would make sure to finish her canvass… without fail.
Meanwhile:
The sound of the ball being hit on the wall and to the racket that he was holding were all the noises he could hear, let alone his grunts and some… frustrations he was feeling at that moment.
He was frustrated and he released his frustrations to the ball and to the wall. He screwed up big this time. His resolved crumbled and he didn't know where to start.
Echizen Ryoma had an epic fail to woe the girl that he was winning back.
She was in front of him when she collapsed yesterday. She was already in his arms but someone just stole her from that… just like that.
She was sick because of the weather… because of the rain. They were soaked for two days but having a strong resistance and endurance, he was not that easily to get sick. Gripping his racket really hard, he focused his attention back to the wall and started hitting the ball to it.
"Frustrations can lead to a messed up game."
Hearing his senpai's voice, he stopped rallying and looked at him. Fuji Syuusuke was walking towards him, his eyes were opened. He rarely showed his eyes opened like that… not that it wasn't something serious. Now that they were opened, he knew that whatever their conversation would be was definitely something serious.
He faced him but he didn't say anything. Fuji took it as if he would speak first which he did;
"I won't hold back anymore, Echizen," He said looking straight to his amber eyes, "You missed your chance of winning her back."
"…"
"I am going to court her."
He stared at him for several seconds. As he did that, he wasn't aware that he was actually clenching his hands along with his racket that he was holding. He only realized when he moved his hand from the racket. He turned around to grab his bag from the bench.
"I am not bluffing this time."
"I know that you are not," He said coolly as he slung his bag to his shoulder and looked back at him, "but that doesn't mean I am going to stop pursuing her."
"You are at it again."
"I haven't given up on her," He said staring closely to his eyes, "Not again. Not ever."
They stared at each other for a long time before they both looked away at the same time. Ryoma walked where his tennis ball had landed and picked it up while Fuji looked at the wall where he was rallying a while ago.
"Do whatever you want and I'll do whatever I want," Fuji said calmly, "I am only quite certain that I am not the one who's going to break her heart."
"…"
"This is about being a man. I am taking you as a rival."
Ryoma, who started walking out from the court, gave him a weak grunt that sounded like a chuckle, "I am considering every guy who approaches her as my rival." With that he continued walking out the court leaving the tensai there. Now that the tensai wasn't going to back down on this, he knew that he should double his effort.
But on what had happened to the both of them recently, he just didn't know what to do. He gave her space and he hoped that the space he gave her was enough for him to approach her again.
Call him stubborn even in the wrong way, but giving up was never listed in his dictionary.
The Next Day Later:
She was closed of finishing her painting as no one did bother her. Good thing that no one did stop her from painting nor bother her as she did so. The club was emptied for she didn't go there just to finish her work. Going to the landmark was the greatest idea that she thought. She was on her way to that place.
Only to be met up with the last person that she wanted to see.
Echizen Ryoma.
With enough practice or so she thought, she was able to appear unaffected of his appearance there. Not really forgetting her manner, she gave the tennis player, who was just standing not far from her, a bow before proceeding to her destination.
"We need to talk."
That stopped her from walking but she didn't look back, "There's nothing to talk about."
"There is. Us."
Taking a deep breath, she tried her best not to look at him but she replied to him, "Ryoma-kun, we are no longer together, let's say, for five? Six months?"
"But I want you back."
"I already gave you that," She closed her eyes as she looked down, "Let's stop now."
"I did go there. I tried catching up to you."
"But we didn't meet," She looked at her sideways giving him a rueful smile, "You cannot just let go of the past."
From the corner of her eyes, she saw him reacted a little. His amber eyes were giving her a slight shock, a way that he would express, in his own way, the Ryoma-ish way. She gave him a shrug before she continued talking;
"It's alright, Ryoma-kun. You're still my friend no matter what."
As she continued walking, all she could think was to reach her destination. But as she took another step, a pair of arm grabbed her waist from behind. Her eyes suddenly widened as she felt the tennis prodigy behind her and she couldn't help but blush a little… and panic a little, "R-Ryoma-kun, let go. I need to—"
"Why can't you see me?"
That stopped her from moving as shock was registered to her face. It seemed that he noticed that so he continued speaking;
"I am trying to correct my wrong doings. Give me time to prove it."
Sakuno remained speechless but she felt awkward at the hold he was giving her.
"I am trying Ryuzaki," He said with a serious tone she could hear from his voice, "and I am striving to win it."
"…"
"…to win you back, I must."
Biting her lower lip, she breathed in deeply for air before she took enough effort to remove his arms from her waist.
"Ryuzaki…"
"G-gomen," She whispered and before he could say another word, she started to run away as she continued speaking, "I don't know."
Ryoma called out to her but she ignored him. It was the most ridiculous thing that she did. And that was to run away from him. Never did she expect that the day she would run away from him would come. The boy was a great runner and it was really thankful of her that he didn't catch up with her through running as well. She managed to 'escape' from him but she was not in the mood to paint once again.
Her concentration was ruined once again and she didn't know why she couldn't finish her art. She had attempted for several times but she couldn't make it. Thinking that way made her lost interest and she was scared of losing the interest completely.
She needed to do something in order to finish that paint. Being at close to be done, she had that urge to continue doing that. At least she was able to continue painting. She hadn't lost hope for that dream.
Her goal was to travel to London, to study art and to meet greatest artists in the world.
And a simple problem wouldn't stop her from pursuing her dreams. That brought her to a stop as she realized that he wasn't following her anymore. That confirmed it when she looked behind her.
Ryoma couldn't be seen anywhere.
Finally calming down, she slowly walked away from that area with a new detour. Since losing the mood for painting that day, she decided to go home and thought of another plan on how to finish her art.
Later on:
Her phone rang just as when she reached home. Fuji was calling her at that moment. She picked it up as she continued on her way to her room.
"Konnichiwa, Fuji-senpai," She said, "Do you need something?"
'Saa, I just want to hear your voice, that's all.'
Blush was able to appear to her cheek when he said as simple as that.
'You are blushing, are you not?'
"Then stop teasing me," Reaching to her door, she pushed it open and made her way inside. She dropped her bag on the floor and sat on her bed, "Is something wrong? Is the practice over?"
'We can get by. How's your painting?'
His question made her vision go to her bag. Sighing, she gripped her apparatus hard and talked to him, "I am home, senpai. I didn't go there."
'You, didn't?' Fuji repeated sounded a little shock, 'It was Echizen, wasn't it?'
"H-hai." She didn't deny that to him, "But I am okay. I'll just rest today," Lighting caught her attention from her window and she started at it, "And I don't think it's going to be a great weather after all."
'I think this is not going to be good,' Fuji agreed to it, 'You better stay indoors.'
Sakun pouted at that, "W-what are you, my mother?"
'Saa… what do you mean by that?'
She was taken aback of her own words and blushed really hard, "G-gomen, senpai. I—I didn't mean—I was happy that you are worried about me."
'I do worry about you.'
"Eh?"
'I love you.'
She gasped audibly and she felt that her face couldn't get even redder than that. Fuji confessed to her… on the phone. Even it was only on the phone, the impact meant a whole lot to her., "S-senpai…"
The rain started to fall after that. Their voices were covered with the raindrops from the outside. The place was getting cold for that. Her heart was drumming from her chest. She bit her lower lip as she gripped her phone harder this time.
'I just told you how I feel. I am not forcing you to answer,' He said from the other line. From the seriousness of his voice, she knew that his eyes were opened at that time, 'All I have to ask is for you to give me a chance.'
"…"
'I'll court you, okay?'
"A-anou… I don't know… what to say."
'Just say yes.'
"Mou," She bit her lower lip once again, "It's not that easy, n-not that…" She couldn't continue her words. Even if she didn't say those words, Fuji knew what they were.
'I know that's why I am competing. I won't lose until you declare it.'
"Senpai…"
'And I am also aiming that one day, you will no longer call me senpai.'
Her heart beat was still beating frankly. Fuji was doing it… to sway her. Of all the places he had the chance to do it, why would it be on the phone. But not really admitting, she found his confession on the phone… nice and calming.
It was new to her.
…New that somehow, she could welcome in the future.
'I won't be long so you should rest,' The tensai suddenly said cutting her from her reverie, 'I'll see you tomorrow then.'
"H-hai, arigatou, senpai." She immediately dropped the call after that, not really wanting for the tensai to reply. Collapsing on the bed, she was able to think what had happened a few seconds ago. Fuji was true to his words. He had telling her how much he liked her and she could feel the seriousness in his tone.
It was the first time the tensai confessed to her on the phone. And like what she had thought a while ago, it was new to her. Definitely. She hadn't stayed for a minute lying down when her phone rang again. Assuming that the tensai was calling back, she answered it without checking the caller.
"Moshi, moshi, senpai? Did you forget something?"
'…'
"Fuji-senpai?" Blinking twice, she wondered why the tensai wasn't talking from the other line. When she received a dead air from the other line, she looked at her screen and her eyes widened when she realized who was calling her.
'Ryuzaki.'
She heard his normal voice from her earpiece but she never responded to him.
'I know you realized by now that it's me,' He said from the other line, 'Considering that you didn't check your caller a few seconds ago.'
That recovered her from the shock and returned to him, not really beating around the bush anymore, "R-Ryoma-kun, didn't we talk about this—"
'You decided that to yourself.'
"And I won't change my mind."
'I'll make you.'
"Ryoma-kun!"
'You know me well. This isn't something I'd give up not that I have the chance.'
"W-what are you talking about?"
'Ryoma-kun,' He emphasized his name to her, 'That's how you call me.'
Now that she heard that, she felt that her own heart skipped a beat. She knew what he was talking about and she hated that he was making her remember those days that she wanted to forget;
"Ryoma-kun, that was in the past. I've been calling you by your name since the first time I met you"
'It doesn't matter. It's what you said does.'
The rain continued falling and she was thankful that there was no thunder warning in the sky. All she could hear was the pitter-patter of raindrops on the ground. A buzz from a moving car was heard from the outside and even from the speaker. Then realization hit her. Forgetting what he had just said, she stood up and walked to the window. Her instinct was right.
Ryoma was there across the street. His phone was on his ear as he was looking at her window. He knew that she saw her from her location. He was not taking any shelter from the rain instead he let the rain soak him there, while he was seriously staring at her window where she was standing.
'I am still…' He started not tearing his gaze to where she was, '…in love with you.'
Panicking, she immediately turned around and hanged up the phone afterwards. Sakuno bit her lip as she slid herself to the wall and crouched there. Of all the happenings dawned upon her, she was in the merge of crying again. Fuji and Ryoma both confessed to her on the phone but the way they delivered their words were unique and different. They had different impact to her but she knew whose words she was most affected with.
The phone rang once again making her flinch in the process. Ryoma was calling her again, reminding herself that she must check the screen due to earlier circumstances. This time, she didn't answer it. She clasped her phone with both hands as she brought them to her forehead. Her elbows were supporting from her folded knees.
"W-why are you doing stupid things like this?" She murmured as the phone kept ringing. A single tear finally fell to her cheek as she bit her lower lip, "Why?"
Three Hours Later:
The sound of the door downstairs woke her up. She didn't realize that she fell asleep on the floor with her knees folded in front of her.
"Sakuno!"
Hearing her grandmother's voice boom downstairs, she immediately bolted up from sitting, "H-hai!"
"You better go downstairs this instant."
Sakuno panicked due to her authoritative voice. When Sumire was like that, she knew that no one would mess up with her. She would probably be in a bad mood or something bad did happen at the court. Throwing her cell phone in the bed which she was still holding, she immediately walked to the door and got out from her room;
"W-what's the matter, Obaa-chan?"
Sumire was holding an umbrella and from the looked of it, it hadn't used yet. The umbrella that she thought she used was on the rack wondering why she would pick another umbrella.
"Echizen is out there and stubbornly refusing my help," Sumire said startling her in the process, "He asked for you so you better solve this. You must face this problem whatever you have with him right now."
"O-Obaa-chan…"
"Sakuno, I know that you know what you are doing," She said giving the umbrella to her, "You cannot hide from him. That boy outside will not leave anytime unless you go there and do what is right."
"…" Looking at the folded umbrella, she bit her lower lip. She slept for what? Three hours? As she looked at the clock a while ago and Ryoma hadn't moved a budge from his position. She never expected anything like that… not for him at all.
"Sakuno," Her grandmother said placing a hand to her shoulder, "if there is a day that you must face things seriously with him, then this is the day."
"…"
"Go and knock some sense to that boy."
xxx
He ignored the cold, the numbness and the rain just to stay there. Sumire was shocked of seeing him there soaking wet under the rain. He refused her offer and help and also refused to give her explanation why the heck he was doing in front of their residence.
Their coach had an idea though so it was useless asking him after all.
What he was doing was awfully ridiculous but he was kind of… desperate of having her to trust him again. He was stubborn so doing something like that was just a piece of cake for him. His body had faced different obstacles and hurdles that this was nothing compared to what he was doing before.
He wanted to win her back.
Ryoma saw her peeking from her window and right after he told her his feelings, she immediately turned around and dropped the call. He tried calling her again but she never answered.
That was why he waited for her there under the rain… for three hours. He didn't remain standing for the whole three hours as he was sitting now. The rain didn't stop from falling. He was looking down and watched the droplets fall from his locks. He was wearing his hat but it was useless to protect his head now. He was wet all over.
A shadow loomed over his and felt that the raindrops were not falling towards his head and back. Looking up, he saw the girl holding an umbrella, wearing a painful expression to her face. Studying her face, she was in the merge of crying once again and she was just suppressing that.
"Y-you're unfair," He could hear Sakuno's trembling voice as she jerk the umbrella a little to his body, "Really unfair."
Few minutes later:
Sakuno didn't know how it came to that at all. Just a few hours ago, she just spotted Ryoma under the falling rain outside while talking to her on the phone and the next thing she knew, he was now sitting on the sofa drying himself in front of the fireplace. His eyes were staring at the hearth where the fire was soothing to stare at… just like she was thinking the same.
And in her eyes, she looked… vulnerable.
The silence was making the place utterly deafening… in a weird way. She was only sitting not far from him and she didn't know how to initiate a conversation towards the guy. Sumire had given him a towel and placed it to his head, leaving them alone afterwards. Her grandmother scolded him for a whole bunch of minutes, giving him sorts of punishments when he returned back to practice tomorrow before leaving the floor to her.
Now they were left alone once again.
Ryoma was her friend and she kept reminding herself that. She was worried about her friend, like how she worried about Tomoka and Kanata. He was her friend so why not worried for him too, "Y-you should dry yourself up. You could get sick."
"…"
"Stop staying under the rain too much. You have to take care of yourself." She tried to reason out when he didn't respond to her first advice.
"Gomen."
That was why she was shocked when he replied almost inaudibly to her ears. That fired her up to continue reminding him, "You have practice tomorrow so please don't do this again."
"Gomen," He whispered once again.
"I guess I should bring you something to wear in exchange to that—" Her voice was cut and her attempt to stand up when his hand stopped her to her arm. She found herself looking at his amber eyes which were looking right back at her.
"Gomen, Ryuzaki," He repeated once again. The way he delivered his apology was different from before and she only realized that on the third. Ryoma was apologizing to her for several times and everytime he did that, she kept telling him that she already did forgive him. His apology was still something that she must not ignore about, "I've been stupid and I am aware of that."
"Ryoma-kun."
"I just couldn't take the fact that you still accept me as your friend, despite of everything," He confessed which was rare to him. He was never expressive not even once. Was he running of options on how to win her back? That was totally ridiculous, "They all hate me for what I did, for I am indifferent."
"Y-you are not—"
"I knew you would say that," Ryoma cut her pulling her back down to the sofa. That was the time she realized that he was still holding her to her arm, "and that's what I like about you."
That made her speechless but her heart was noisy. Her heart was betraying her again… she wasn't even aware that Ryoma slid his hand and reached for her hand and squeezed it.
"That'll never change even if you don't choose me," He said seriously despite the awkward atmosphere they had. All she could do was to stare at his eyes as he continued speaking, "Just be happy."
The words were strong but his expression was somehow… rueful in his own way. His eyes softened, looking at her doe-liked eyes.
"I'll be contented if you do."
She didn't know but his words seemed to affect her. His voice was calm yet she could sense signs of regret from it. And she knew that she would regret things as well if she made the wrong decision in the future.
Only she hoped that she wouldn't.
Done! How was this chapter? So many RyoSaku moments here and a slight FujiSaku tee hee hee... :P What do you think of Ryoma here? Does he deserve to have another chance?
Tell me your thoughts please. Thank you very much.
The song (translated in English) featured in this chapter wasn't owned by me. It solely belonged to Junko Minagawa. I just love sharing what I love.
Next Chapter: What eyes can't see is what the skin feels